Chapter Eleven

Lia

My favorite parts of the day were the mornings, during school drop-off, afternoons during parent pick-up, and then late at night after children were asleep. If I had to choose, though, it would be the latter.

Then I had Jacob all to myself. Then we didn’t have to worry about anyone seeing us, noticing anything between us. Then we didn’t have to worry about watching eyes, little girls waking, or anything. The only people who knew about us were Anna and Ellis, and they wouldn’t tell a soul.

Not that I wanted to keep Jacob a secret. That was all his idea, which made me uncomfortable. I told myself he was doing it because he was a good dad, because he didn’t want to hurt his daughters, but I couldn’t help and feel as if he was ashamed of me.

Was I not pretty enough? Sexy enough? He certainly found me so when we were alone, I reasoned, so I just had to remind myself he was a dad and his girls came first. He didn’t want them to get teased in the playground or be subjected to gossip. When the time was right, he’d tell them.

He’d tell everyone.

In the meantime, I just had to treasure the moments we got alone.

It was parent pick-up time and I was busy chatting to a new student’s mom who was worried how her boy was settling in. I was assuring her that he was okay when I heard Ava’s voice.

“Mommy!”

At first, I didn’t register her words. It was only when I looked up and saw Jacob and the woman walking down the corridor that the pieces fell into place.

Ava ran down the hall and threw herself in the woman’s arms as I tried to keep my composure, tried to keep listening to what the parent was saying.

But truthfully, I had no idea. I was too caught up in the other woman.

The woman I’d heard so much about. Tara. Jacob’s ex-wife. The woman he’d once loved so much that she wasn’t a secret. She wasn’t someone he saw only at night when they were alone. She was the woman he’d proudly walked down the aisle with and declared to the world he loved more than anyone else.

She was not me.

She was tall, very tall, and thin. She reminded me of a catwalk model, which only made me feel worse. For weeks, I’d been imagining a dirty junkie, but the woman in front of me was anything but. Her hair was long and glossy, a thick chestnut color that glowed with auburn highlights. Her skin was flawless, her eyes large and brown-fringed with long dark lashes and accentuated by high, arched cheekbones. She was dressed in denim jeans, a plain white t-shirt, and sneakers, but on her they looked effortless and chic.

This was the woman who made Jacob’s and the girls’ lives a living hell?

This was his drug-addicted, low-life ex-wife?

I somehow felt as if I’d been played.

I looked away from Tara to find Jacob watching me carefully, his expression unreadable. I wanted him to say something, I wanted to hear something reassuring. I wasn’t quite sure what, but I wanted it. In the face of this beautiful woman who was everything I wasn’t, I needed something from him. I wanted him to tell me she wasn’t Tara, that she was his sister or something. That even though this stunning, glamazon was his wife he wanted me not her. That she meant nothing to him.

Now they were headed in my direction. I stiffened, resisting the urge to turn and flee.

Up close, she was even more beautiful. I was acutely aware of how plain and ordinary I must have looked in my pants and blouse. I probably had paint in my hair as well.

“Hi.” She smiled warmly at me. “You must be Miss Henley? I’ve heard so much about you.”

I stared at Jacob, who remained mute.

“Oh?”

“Ava just adores you,” she continued. “She talked about you all morning over breakfast.”

Breakfast? I didn’t look at Jacob. Is this why he hurried out of my bed this morning? Because Tara was coming for breakfast? Sickening feelings of hurt curled in my chest.

“Ava is a lovely little girl,” I managed over the knot in my throat. “She’s delightful.”

A look flickered over Tara’s face. “You probably know about my—uh—er—problems. I was hoping we could talk some time?”

“We can. I’m afraid I can’t right now—”

“Oh no, that’s all right. Not now. We are going out with the girls now, anyhow. We said we’d take them to the park and then for pizza.” She turned her sweet smile on Jacob, “Didn’t we?”

Jacob nodded, still not saying a word. Something in me crumpled a little.

“That sounds nice.”

“But I’ll come by one day after school next week,” she said with a wave. “I have a lot I want to talk to you about.”

I nodded. Tara turned with Ava and headed off, their hands linked and swinging. I stared Jacob, who stared back at me. His eyes were full. He was sorry. I could see that. He was sorry and regretful, and I knew just looking at him that he was going to break my heart.

I’d always known it. Someone like Jacob, so sexy and dangerous and completely out of my league, was always going to break my heart.

I knew it. I’d been expecting.

I just didn’t expect it to hurt so damned much.