Chapter Twenty Five
Sophia~
We’re eating apple pie when I ask, “Have you ever been in love, Miss Ella?”
“I try to avoid it,” Miss Ella pats her mouth with a napkin and then looks right at me. “Love is like a car accident, child.”
Resting my elbows on the table, I rest my chin on my hands and frown at her.
“It hits you hard and out of the blue. By the time you realize that you’re in love, it’s too late to run for the hills. When it’s done with your poor heart; you’re either in a world of pain, or you’re one of the lucky ones who has a great story to tell. Love will either break you or make you.”
I stare at Miss Ella as what she just said sinks in. It will either break me or make me.
“What Miss Ella is trying to say is that love can hurt if it’s not returned by the other person, and love can be a beautiful thing if both parties feel the same way.”
I glance at River. I didn’t see her coming in. What she says makes a lot of sense. It’s what I’ve been feeling with Adam the past weeks. When he avoided me it hurt, but last night felt so incredibly good.
“Beautiful thing my ass. You don’t have a clue what love is,” Jack suddenly growls.
He stands up and resting his hands on the table, he towers over us all, looking like he’s about to kill someone.
“I’m damaged, River, not destroyed.”
His words slam the breath right from my lungs, and I gasp.
As he leaves the kitchen, I get up and go after him. I make sure to keep my distance as I follow him down to the chapel.
When we reach the clearing, I suck in a breath.
“It’s so beautiful, Jack.” I walk over to a flower and lightly brush my fingers over it. Jack doesn’t even look at me. He starts to work as if I’m not here.
I bite my bottom lip and try again, “I used to watch you through the window while you worked in the garden.”
Jack keeps working the ground over, his movements almost aggressive
“Did you know about David?” he suddenly growls.
I take a step back and whisper, “Yes.”
He stops shoveling, but keeps his back to me. When he doesn’t say anything I say, “You know we weren’t allowed to talk about anything that happened there.”
The words sound empty, even to me.
I swallow hard and whisper, “I’m sorry, Jack. I’m so sorry.”
I rush away from him and the guilt I feel for my part in his pain.
***
I’m making some coffee for us while Adam is showering.
There’s a knock at the door and I go to open it. River looks shocked to see me. “Is Adam here?”
“Yes, he’s just taking a shower. Come in,” I say, smiling softly at her. I don’t get to talk to her much but I’m very grateful for all she’s done for me.
I walk back to the kitchen. “Would you like some?” I ask while I finish making the coffee for Adam and myself.
“No, thank you,” she says. “You look good, Sophia.”
I feel my cheeks heat and I glance at Adam’s closed bedroom door. “Adam is good to me. He’s teaching me what’s right and what’s wrong.”
“I’m so happy for you.”
Adam comes walking down the hallway and I take in his body. I love it when he only wears a pair of sweats. He looks at River and then at me, as if he’s worried about me. Just the thought that he might be concerned about me makes my stomach erupt with butterflies.
“Is there something you needed?” he asks River.
She shakes her head, then says, “I’m sorry for slapping you the other night. You were right and I just didn’t want to hear it. I’m so sorry, Adam.”
My lips part in surprise. She slapped Adam? My eyes jump to his face and I watch as he smiles. He walks over to her and hugs her. He cups her cheek and his eyes are soft on her. “You deserve to be happy, and so does he.”
“Thank you for always being there to point me in the right direction.”
“Always, that’s what friends are for.”
He locks the door behind River, then comes back to the kitchen. He doesn’t sit down to have his coffee, but instead walks around the counter to where I am.
He takes hold of my hips and he lifts me onto the counter. I feel nervous and for a moment I let the feeling take over.
“I missed you today,” he says, his voice hoarse. It makes my insides clench in a way I’ve never felt before.
“I missed you too,” I whisper back.
I reach out and touch his chest. I trail my fingers softly over his skin. I watch as his muscles ripple under my touch.
He brings his hand to my cheek and he slips his fingers into my hair.
I press my forehead to his and whisper, “I’m scared.”
“Of what?” he asks.
“What if we have sex and it’s …” I let the words trail away, not wanting to say them out loud. I’m so scared that when I’m with Adam it won’t be any different from when I was a slave.
“You’re scared it will be the same?” he asks. I pull back and look into his eyes. There’s so much strength in them, that it overwhelms me. “It will be good because it will be us. It will mean you made a choice.”
I nod, feeling better about it.
He steps closer, pressing against my knees. I hesitate for a heartbeat before I open my legs. He steps between then and keeping me imprisoned with his eyes, he leans into me until I feel his breath on my lips.
My heart starts to pound so fast it makes me feel dizzy.
He doesn’t kiss me like I expect him to. He keeps perfectly still as his breaths tickle my lips.
I close my eyes and let every feeling consume me. The nerves. The anticipation. The want. The need. The delicious feeling that comes with knowing that this man sees me. That every ugly part of me is beautiful to him.