Chapter 7
“Is there anything that would make you settle down?”
Chatan’s question rolled through Jacinda. She turned to study him. They drove over a dip in the road and she caught herself on the dash as she thought about the answer.
“Never thought about it. Maybe when I find what I’m looking for.” Not that he would ever understand.
Glancing over, he smiled. “Let me help you find what you’re looking for.”
She almost asked why, but it was clear he was interested in a lot more than she could ever give him. At least until she found a way to kill Thanatos. She didn’t want to fall in love only to lose him.
Which meant she needed to solve the clues.
She let out a long sigh. “I’m not even sure what I’m looking for, Chatan. I can’t ask you to search for something I can’t explain.”
“Then how will you know when you find it?”
“Who knows?” She turned to stare out the window. She had to keep the faith her father knew what he was talking about.
Chatan drove. The silence stretched. Then he pulled onto another gravel road and drove a couple miles before pulling to a stop on a loop at the end.
“Where are we?”
His eyes twinkled as he watched her. “Trust me, Jace.”
He slid out of the truck and she climbed down. At the front of the truck, Chatan took her hand. A shiver worked through her body. “Does that mean you do?” he teased.
“So far,” she answered, holding his stare.
He pulled her down a sandy trail and fell in step with her considerably shorter stride. “Like walking?”
“I do, especially when surrounded by such beauty.” And Chatan fit into that category, but the forest itself was a magical place. Pushing down her desire, she focused on the trail, the scenery, and her hand in his.
Could she really spend a week or two in Wanatoga and resist more time with Chatan? Did she want to? If she were smart, she’d find a reason or a way to avoid him.
But that was the last thing she wanted. He was easy to be around. He woke something up inside her, longing for a friend, maybe a lover.
What would her mother say?
Best not to think of that. Instead, she asked, “Tell me about your father. Where is he?”
“Up north, near my brothers. After Mom died, he needed to go elsewhere. I stay with him a couple months a year, but it’s not home. I wind up going to hang out with my brothers, or my cousin.” He sighed. “Seems like everyone I know has found their person or finally accepted what was right in front of them.”
She perked up. “Right in front of them?”
He nodded. “My cousin Eddie and his fiancé Jackie are probably my closest friends. Her dad died when she was six. She wound up living with Eddie’s family. And everyone treated them like brother and sister. For years, neither could admit what they were to each other. Now they’re more whole together than they ever were apart. The road they traveled to get there was long, hard, and full of twists, but they’re where they should be.”
“You want that?”
“Don’t you?” he replied, as if that was the only thing anyone could want.
“Never stopped to think about being with someone.” Until he became a temptation.
He shook his head, blinking. “No one? You’ve never dated, gone out with someone? Nothing?”
She gulped. “Consider my life a moment. I don’t stop any one place for long. I don’t make friends—usually. I keep my distance, because I know I’m not staying.”
“And what if someone were willing to follow you?”
She snorted. “I don’t know. Never had that happen.”
A part of her brain was yelling at her to run before she got tangled up with someone she could really fall in love with. In that moment, she realized she was in deep trouble and sinking fast.
They fell back into silence, and she finally relaxed as time ticked by. He didn’t pester her, didn’t pry when she started to shut down. Chatan seemed to understand what she needed even before she did.
A sensation started at her toes, working its way up her spine and to the tips of her hair. She gasped. “What is that?”
He squeezed her hand. “Follow your instinct.”
Jacinda moved faster, then took off running. Chatan kept up like it was the most natural speed in the world. After several minutes that seemed to stretch into forever, she burst into a clearing. A perfect circle, black sand, surrounded by trees that seemed miles tall. In the center stood a pillar made of hematite, covered in symbols.
Her father drew the very same stone in the journal. And before she ever made it to the clearing, it called to her. The magic was so familiar.
Runes and other symbols she’d only ever found in her father’s journal decorated the stone.
Slowing down, she crossed the distance and ran her fingers over a string of familiar words she’d mostly translated, save two from a language she hadn’t found.
Light danced in the etchings as she made contact, and dazzling blue light filled the carved symbols. Placing her hands flat on the pillar amplified a voice she could hear but couldn’t decipher.
The ground fell away as she started to fall into blackness.
Her father stood over the crib, murmuring the lilting chant she could never forget. His voice was the most soothing thing she could recall. His accent was faded Irish.
She couldn’t have been more than two, but she stood up in the crib and reached for her daddy.
He picked her up. “Morning, my little dove. Sleep well?”
“Mmm.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged tight.
He squeezed her back. “One day, you’ll save us all. You’re the key, Jace. You’re the one who will stop Thanatos.”
Jacinda yawned, laying her head on his shoulder, clinging to his shirt.
“One day a hawk will show my dove the way.”
He placed a kiss on her head as he rocked her back and forth. Then he murmured the words again.
* * * *
Jacinda reached for the pillar and Chatan’s breath caught as light sprang to life in the symbols she touched. He rushed forward as she placed her hands on the stone. An unseen force flung her back.
He caught her and sank into a cross-legged position with her in his lap. He arranged her so he could cradle her while running his fingers through all those red curls. Freckles covered her face, her shoulders, her arms, even her legs. He wanted to trace patterns on her skin, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to resist pushing boundaries if he took that step. Instead, he focused on her soft hair.
Chatan looked up at the pillar once more. Every symbol had come to life with colors with her touch and the words she spoke. The pillar gave off one hell of a light show, but the surrounding forest would hide that from Saint Morton.
What had she done? Most of the symbols were from other languages, other people. They all knew that. He recognized a few of the runes and the symbols in his language, but most weren’t familiar.
And the only answer he could come up with, her father was part of the group that powered the pillar in the first place. The casters who came together to lock away an old evil and protect the land. All the elders ever called the group was the Branches. No one had more information. And every so many years, someone from the group would come and feed power into the stone.
Who was her father? How far could he push to get that answer? Maybe the elders or even his father knew something more about what she was searching for.
The elders said it took many kinds of magic to unlock the pillar. Maybe her blood was so mixed she had the right magic to do what took several people to do.
Which meant she was the perfect target for someone stealing magic. Chatan wanted to keep her safe from Josephine.
He combed his fingers through her hair, rocking with Jacinda. Her lips moved, barely a whisper escaping. She spoke gibberish, or so it seemed, but he could swear he’d heard it somewhere before, even if he couldn’t understand or recall where.
There were so many questions, and he was half-tempted to call his father. Only Dad would want to meet her, and he wanted to wait until he knew she wouldn’t run.
His father always said a woman would come along who’d change his life. One who’d unlock his gifts. One he’d fall hopelessly in love with, but Chatan wasn’t sure his father had ever been hopelessly in love. He loved women, but so many of them. Had any of them changed his life forever? Probably not.
Needing a distraction, Chatan sang a song his mother taught him. Jacinda curled closer, pressing her cheek against his chest as her hand twisted in his shirt.
Her scent wrapped around him, drawing him deeper. Something deep inside recognized her as a part of him. It made no sense. He would have remembered her angelic face, her tender tone, that smile.
Dakota wouldn’t give him grief, but his other brother would. Tomahawk would tease that he was falling hard, just like he had. And then Eddie…Shit, what would his cousin say?
An hour passed with her in his arms. He could have sat there forever, but someone would have come looking eventually.
In fact, he was almost surprised that no one had, with the way the stone lit up. Magic had washed past him. How far had that shockwave gone? Did it pass the barrier to the reservation? If so, Josephine would know. Their town wasn’t far from where they sat in the sand.
If he needed to, he would protect Jacinda. Hopefully, they’d be out of there before the idiots from Saint Morton could snoop around.
* * * *
A steady rhythm lulled her awake, a deep voice singing a familiar song in a different language. She felt as if she’d heard another voice sing those very same lyrics.
Gentle fingers caressed her face and her eyes fluttered open. Chatan stared down at her, a smile on his lips. “You okay, Jace?”
She sucked in a breath as she realized she was cradled in his lap. She’d never been more comfortable in her life, and she shouldn’t be.
Startled by the realization, she tried to shoot to her feet. He was faster, picking her up off the ground. She fell back into his embrace.
“Slow down. I’m sorry if this is too personal, but you scared me.” And man, he sounded disappointed that she didn’t like to be that close. Only, in this case, she wanted to be closer.
And she didn’t know how to explain that she was afraid of these new feelings. Biting her tongue, she shook her head. She didn’t want to encourage him because she couldn’t resist.
After she’d calmed her breathing, she placed one hand on his chest. “Please, put me down. I’m sorry I was startled. Never been this close to a man.” She closed her eyes, then shrugged. “Whatever happened, I wasn’t expecting that.”
She could still hear her father’s words in her head. The ones she’d later learned were in the Irish language.
“Slowly,” Chatan said, but he helped her stand, then held on to her biceps gently, ensuring she had her balance.
She couldn’t help smiling. “Thank you for watching over me. Now, what happened?”
“I’ll explain on the way back, but we might want to take it slow.”
“How late are we?”
He smiled. “We have time before dinner, but it means I’ll have to take you to our next destination tomorrow, or later.”
“You aren’t tired of me yet?” she asked, more amazed than anything else. She didn’t like being around people long, usually. And she couldn’t get enough time with Chatan.
He laughed. “Don’t think I can tire of you. I’ll admit, it was nice to hold you, even if it only lasted a couple hours.”
“Why?”
“Why what? I’m happy I got to hold a beautiful woman I can’t get enough of. Don’t worry, I didn’t molest you. You went out like a light, and I wasn’t sure how you’d react to me carrying you a couple miles back to the truck.”
Her eyebrows shot up. “We’re that far from the truck?” It hadn’t seemed like that far.
He nodded. “Yeah, which means slow and steady, until I’m sure you’re not going to faint again.”
The rest of what he said sank in. She gulped. “You think I’m beautiful?”
“Yes, and I thought that was obvious. Jacinda, you’re breathtaking, and if no one has ever told you that, there’s something wrong with every man you’ve encountered.”
Blushing, she ducked her gaze. “Thank you, but that might be my fault. I’ve never given anyone the opportunity to say anything. I’m not like this around anyone else.”
“So, you don’t think of yourself as ugly?”
She shook her head. “No. Never really considered it, but no. I wouldn’t call myself ugly.” Then she laughed. “Is it weird I never considered that?”
“That’s both sad and good.”
“How?” she asked, her brow arched.
“Sad because you’ve never thought about it. Good, because you’ve never had low self-esteem.”
“For the record, I’ve never been more attracted to anyone.” She closed her eyes after admitting the one thing sure to push things forward. Then she figured this might be her only opportunity to explore things with a man. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to entertain the thought. At least for a little while.
She sighed. “Sorry, I’m nervous and not used to this.”
He swept her hair back and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Come on, Jace. We should get to dinner.”
The walk back went faster than she expected. Time seemed to fly.
Chatan asked, “Do you know what those symbols mean?”
“All but one set. I’ve searched, but I’ve never seen them.”
He smiled. “Know any Native American symbols?”
She shook her head.
“I’m guessing the ones you couldn’t find are the ones in my mother’s language. I only know there are Fae and other arcane symbols on the pillar.”
She laughed. “Yes. Actually, there are two Fae languages on that pillar, at least two that I saw. And two sets of runes. The other language, that’s yours?”
He nodded. “Where have you seen the others?”
“My father’s journal,” she admitted.
“Makes sense. Though, when was he here?”
“Honestly? I’m not sure. Before I was born, but that could have been anytime through the years. He was born in 1904 and died about twenty years ago. So, it could have been anytime.”
“The pillar has been there longer than that. But it seems every generation or so, someone comes to add symbols to the pillar. Different people, all connected to something called the Branches. Maybe he was one of them.”
“Maybe.”
“Could I see the journal?”
She paused.
“I could help you decipher the rest of our symbols. And remember, I know a few runes, but I don’t know enough to read them.”
Jacinda fiddled with the hem of her shirt. “Maybe tomorrow. It’s the only thing of his I have.”
He cupped her shoulder and ran his thumb back and forth. “I wouldn’t take the book. I wouldn’t read what he wrote. I want to help decipher the symbols.”
“Which is why I’ll probably let you. But it’s been a long day.” She needed to think all of this through. Accepting his help was probably her best chance to figure out what her father thought she’d be able to do.
“You’re still having dinner with us?”
She nodded.
“And after? It will be early.” The hope in his gaze pulled her toward him.
Her stomach fluttered. “We’ll see. I want to figure out what happened at the pillar.”
She felt as if she were supposed to learn something from the experience. Something she missed. Had Chatan somehow anchored her to the spot? Had his fear prevented her from seeking the answers?
“So, where did you go?”
“Hmm?” She looked up at Chatan.
“You went on a journey, one I couldn’t follow you on. Where did you go while you were under?”
Under? Journey? That was an odd way to put it, but maybe not. She looked over with a smile. “Like a spirit walk?”
“Maybe?” He squeezed her hand. “You tell me, Jacinda.”
“It was like I was thrust into the past, back when my father used to…sing to me.” It wasn’t singing, exactly, but she didn’t think Chatan would understand.
“Hmm.”
“I felt as if I were transported there. Like an out of body experience, only I was little again.” She shook her head.
His smile was sweet. “Must mean something.”
“Yeah, I think so, but I’m not sure what.”
“You’ll figure it out when the time is right.”
“Have you been on many spirit walks?” she asked.
“Only twice. Once to figure out who my spirit animal is. Another time to help guide me when I felt so lost I didn’t know what to do.”
“Why were you lost?” Jacinda asked.
“Fell in love, got my heart stomped on. I was angry, frustrated. I did everything right, was the better man, and it wasn’t enough to keep her.”
Her hands tightened to fists as her gaze swung his way. “She cheated on you?”
He nodded. “Yeah.” Then he sighed. “It was young love. Things moved too fast. She got pregnant, but she was sleeping with someone else, and she wanted him more. And he didn’t want a child, so she aborted. I found out later and it crushed me that she not only chose someone else, but she didn’t even discuss it with me. I mean, it was her choice, but it still tore me apart to know that life meant nothing to her.”
“I-I’m sorry.”
He shook his head. “It was a long time ago.”
“How old were you?”
He let out a short laugh. “Seventeen. Like I said, young, stupid, but it was love, at least on my side.”
“I can’t imagine what you went through, or what pushed her to make that decision.”
“I don’t expect you to. I’m sorry I brought it up.”
“No, don’t. It’s important to you. She broke your trust, then did something you can’t understand. That has to hurt.”
“You know the worst part? She’s still here, and now she realizes she made a mistake, but I can’t forgive her for how she broke me into pieces.”
Her heart raced at the thought that the girl from his past was there and might want him now. She wanted to demand why he was telling her this part of his past, but he clearly needed to express himself.
Jacinda pulled him to a stop and turned toward Chatan. So much sadness stared back that she wanted to comfort him. Reaching out, she touched his face. His hand covered hers as his breathing calmed.
His hand wrapped around her waist as he brought her closer. She wound her arm around his back as he engulfed her in his arms.
“I wish I knew what to say to take the pain away,” Jacinda murmured.
He pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “You already are. Since you’ve been here, I don’t feel so alone.”
She felt the same but couldn’t bring herself to admit it. She’d never considered how lonely her life had been until she watched him walk home the night before.
The desire to have someone in her life scared the hell out of her.
“Dinner will be soon,” he murmured.
“Yeah.”
“We should go.” Chatan didn’t let go. No, he held tighter. “What are you doing to me?” he whispered.
A nervous laugh bubbled up. “Me?”
* * * *
Chatan had been in love.
Twice.
Neither time made him feel like he did when he was with Jacinda. He hardly knew her. She hadn’t opened up. And the thought of her moving on promised to break him.
“Only good things. Thank you.” He squeezed her tight, then released her.
Jacinda blushed, but she threaded her fingers through his. “Come on, we need to go.”
He allowed her to lead him toward the car while he sorted his head. Jacinda was nervous, because of him, which made sense. She hadn’t been with anyone, hadn’t explored relationships.
And here he was, wanting to dive in and show her everything she’d been missing. For once in his life, he didn’t mind having some patience for a woman. In fact, he wanted to take things slow, make her crave him half as much as he needed her. He’d survived worse things than prolonged desire without sating the hunger.
“I never expected you,” Jacinda murmured.
He couldn’t help smiling. “Tell me that’s good.”
“It is.” She glanced over and looked away again. Whatever she was thinking, she kept to herself. He wanted into her head, into her thoughts. He wanted to understand what she was afraid of, what she was searching for.
He stopped at the passenger side and opened the door.
She leaned closer, her scent flaring. “Thank you for showing me these places.”
“There’s more. I plan to take you to the waterfall tomorrow. We ran out of time today.”
“Why can’t we go after dinner?”
“No one goes there after dark. Maybe tonight, after dinner, we can go for a walk, and I’ll tell you some of the legends surrounding the reservation.”
Her eyes lit up. “Really?”
He nodded, pleased with her reaction. “Definitely.” Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her into the seat.
Her hands landed on his chest, sending warm tingles through him. There was nothing like the sensation every time they touched. To keep from giving into temptation, he closed her into the truck and moved to his side.
Jacinda wore a soft look as she chewed on her bottom lip, staring out the window.
“What are you thinking?” Chatan asked.
“That it’s going to be hard to move on when I need to.”
“Maybe you’ll find a reason to stay.”
“Maybe,” she answered, but didn’t sound convinced.
This time the silence quickly became awkward. But he didn’t push and he didn’t pry. Sooner or later, he would. There was a story there, one he wanted to understand.