“You’re sure about this?” I look up at the apartment building in front of me and then back to where my best friend, Tess, is sitting in the passenger seat of my car.
She arrived in California two days ago with a plan to win back Sebastian, her high school boyfriend and perhaps the love of her life. Those two have gone back and forth for so many years I can’t keep up with them anymore. Though I must admit, I was surprised when she showed up at my front door the day before yesterday. In the five years since she and Sebastian broke up, this is the first time she’s made any real attempt to salvage what they have—or had; I guess that part still remains to be seen.
“I’m sure,” Tess finally manages to answer my question, letting out a slow breath as she looks back in my direction, her blue eyes full of uncertainty.
I give her a warm smile and reach out to pat her leg. Tess has always been the strong one, the one to hold our little group together. It’s weird feeling like I’m somehow the rock in this situation. I guess it just goes to show how full circle our friendship has come.
“You can do this, Tess,” I reassure her. “Just walk up there, knock on his door, and tell him you love him.”
“Just like that,” she laughs nervously. “You make it sound so easy.”
“He loves you, and you love him. If you both focus on that it should be easy.”
She nods, forcing a small smile. “I hope you’re right.”
“Only one way to find out.” I look up at the apartment building again and then back to Tess. “Go, you got this.”
“You’ll keep your phone on you in case I need you to come back?” she asks for what feels like the hundredth time.
“Yes, now stop stalling and go,” I say, not telling her I have no intention of actually going anywhere until I know she’s good.
“Okay.” She lets out a deep breath before pushing open the car door and climbing out. I offer a few additional words of encouragement before she shuts the door, and within moments, disappears inside.
I stare at the building for the next several minutes, envisioning what might be happening inside and if my best friend is finally getting the man she’s loved nearly half her life. It took a lot of courage for her to come here. I know it couldn’t have been easy. And not just flying across the country to pour her heart out to Sebastian; I’m sure that’s nothing compared to breaking off a two-year relationship with the other man she just agreed to marry days ago.
I have to admit, I envy her strength. To go after what you want so fiercely it’s a quality I wish I possessed. Then again, I don’t know that I’ve ever truly wanted anything that badly before. To get away from my alcoholic mother and the less than desirable company she keeps, maybe, but I don’t know that I’ve ever wanted or needed something so badly that I would put everything on the line to go for it.
But Tess, she loves with her whole heart and has more drive and desire in her little toe than I have in my entire body. That’s one of the things I love so much about her. She may seem shy and innocent to some, but to those of us who really know her she is anything but. She’s strong and independent. Fiercely loyal and trusting to a fault. There isn’t one thing she wouldn’t do for the people she loves. She’s shown me that on numerous occasions.
I’m so lost in my thoughts that I barely register the tall, broad man crossing toward me until he’s standing right in front of my car. He meets my eyes through the windshield, and a wide smile immediately flashes across his face.
“Anthony Treadway.” I almost squeal, climbing from the car so quickly you would think it had just burst into flames.
Within seconds my arms are wrapped around his middle, squeezing him like he’s the sweetest damn thing I’ve ever seen. Honestly, he just might be.
Anthony, or Ant as we’ve always called him, dated my other best friend, Courtney, in high school. They were very Tess and Sebastian for a while, but things rapidly declined for them and they broke up shortly before I left for California between my junior and senior year of high school. And while I considered Ant a good friend of mine, I haven’t seen or spoken to him since I moved.
“Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” I smile up at him as I step out of his embrace.
He’s a good head and shoulders taller than me and just as attractive as he was in high school, or at least that’s what I think until that smile of his once again graces his face. Nope, definitely hotter now.
“Bree Kingsley, as I live and breathe.” He looks at me like he couldn’t be happier to see me, and in some weird way that leaves me with a whooshing feeling in my gut.
“My god it feels like it’s been forever.” I take a full step back so I can really get a good look at him. Tall, lean, broad shoulders—he’s filled out a lot in the last five years. His dark hair is a little longer, pushed to the side haphazardly to keep the strands from falling into his eyes, and he has some day-old scruff lining his jaw, giving him a rugged quality that I have to admit is definitely doing it for me.
I shake off the thought. Ant is someone I’ve always harbored a bit of a crush on. Nothing I ever acted on, of course. He was Courtney’s and therefore completely off limits. That didn’t stop me from checking him out every chance I got, but that little bit of information I always kept to myself.
“What are you doing all the way out here in my neck of the woods?” I ask. “Last I heard you were living in Boston.”
“I’ve actually been here a couple months now. Needed a change of scenery.”
“And how’s that working out for you?” I question, just needing to fill the space.
“I love it. I love the weather, the beaches, and the laidback west coast vibe.” He shuffles his feet as he shoves his hands into the front pockets of his worn jeans.
“Thinking you might hang around for a while?” I question.
“Maybe.” He shrugs, non-committal. “Guess that depends on whether or not Tess is stealing my roomie.” He chuckles, gesturing to the building behind him.
I was so preoccupied with my shock to see Ant again that I had all but forgotten about Tess and what she may or may not be facing upstairs at the present moment.
“How do you think it’s going?” I ask.
“Hard to say.” He shrugs. “But if I had to guess, I’d say they’re definitely to third base by now.”
“Oh my god,” I laugh, shaking my head. “Of course, you would say that.”
“What?” He grins. “I’m just saying, it’s probably true.”
“Ugh, you’re probably right,” I laugh out in agreement.
“So how are you, Bree, really?” Ant refocuses, the last part of his sentence feeling a bit accusatory.
“I’m great. Perfect actually. How about you?”
“Well, I up and moved across the country on a whim with no real idea of what the hell I’m going to do with myself next, so I’d say I’m pretty much fucked at the current moment.” He smiles, despite the seriousness of his words.
“Tell me how you really feel,” I joke, sensing that he needs the lighthearted banter.
“So… Perfect huh?” He shifts his weight from one foot to the other, his blue/gray eyes never leaving mine.
“What?” I blurt, confused by his question.
“You said you were perfect,” he reminds me of my earlier statement.
“Oh, yeah. Well, perfect might be too strong of a word. But I’m doing okay.”
“And how’s Jackson?” The fact that he remembers my son’s name surprises me a bit. Then again, Ant has always been good at holding on to details.
In high school, we used to joke that he could walk into any room for thirty seconds and then walk back out, able to recount exact details of what the twenty people inside were doing without a second thought.
“He’s good, getting big.” I smile at the thought of the one human being who means more to me than any other person on this earth.
“I bet. How old is he now, five?”
“Yep, just turned five actually.”
“Ever hear from Blake?” The minute the question leaves his lips I can tell he wishes he could take it back. I understand his hesitance to ask about Jackson’s father, but it doesn’t bother me that he did.
“No, though I never actually expected to. That was kinda the point in coming here.” I shrug, knowing it certainly wasn’t the only reason.
Getting my son away from my mother was another big reason I left the only home I had ever known and moved from Connecticut to California to live with my grandparents when I was only seventeen.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I asked that.”
“Don’t be, it’s fine.” I wave a hand through the air. “I never got to properly thank you for everything you did for me that night.” The statement leaves my lips on a rush, and it takes me a beat to realize that I just said the words out loud.
I can tell by the look on Ant’s face that he knows exactly what I’m referring to, and a sad smile pulls up one side of his mouth like he’s just not quite sure how to react to what I just said.
“You don’t ever need to thank me for that,” he says after thinking over it for a long moment. “He’s just lucky I didn’t kill him for putting his hands on you, or Tess for that matter.” A hint of anger crosses his handsome face.
“Well, thank you anyway. And thank you for not blabbing about what you saw to the whole school. It was hard enough having people whisper about how the school slut had gotten knocked up at sixteen. I can only imagine what they would’ve said had they known that I was also letting the guy who got me pregnant beat on me for sport.”
“Hey.” Ant takes a step toward me, somehow sensing the shift in my demeanor.
“It’s okay.” I shake it off, my easy smile falling back into place.
This is what I do, the mask I wear. Every once in a great while, I let the wall slip; though, it’s almost always Tess or Court who get to see inside. Never a person like Ant—someone I haven’t seen in years and am no longer particularly close to. I wish I could say this thought doesn’t bother me, but truthfully it does; which I guess is why a tight knot has formed in the pit of my stomach, and I suddenly feel slightly panicked.
I open my mouth to say more, but I’m momentarily distracted by the cell phone that comes to life in my hand. I jump, startled by the unexpected noise. Quickly looking down at my phone, a small panic rushes through me when I see Tess’ name flash across the screen.
“Hey, everything okay?” I quickly answer, my voice rushed.
“Yes.” I can hear the smile in her voice instantly. “I just wanted you to know you don’t need to wait for me.”
“How did you know I was waiting?” I question, even though I know it’s just because she knows me that well.
“Like you would’ve just left me,” she says, like it’s the most absurd thing in the world. “But seriously, you can go now.” She sounds so happy it drips from every word that leaves her mouth.
“That good, huh?” I giggle, meeting Ant’s curious gaze and giving him a nod. He smiles and lets out a long sigh, thinking what I’m sure we both are—it’s about time.
“Um, yeah. So I’ll just call you later?” She seems flustered, and I instantly flash back to Ant’s comment about what base they were probably on.
“Okay. You two have fun,” I croon over the line before ending the call without waiting for a response.
“Looks like I’m gonna need to find somewhere else to stay tonight,” Ant chuckles, shaking his head.
“I would say that’s an accurate assumption,” I agree. “Those two have five years of built-up frustration to get out of their system.”
“I really don’t want to think about what they’re going to be getting out of their systems.” He shakes his head as if trying to shake the visual image away. “What about you? What are your plans for the night?”
“Well, considering I had no idea how this whole thing was going to go down, I cleared my day. Jackson is staying the night at my grandparents, that way on the off-chance things didn’t go Tess’ way, I could take on the role of drinking buddy and shoulder to cry on.”
“Well, it just so happens I’m in need of a drinking buddy.” He quirks a brow. “I mean, I would hate to see a kid-free night go to waste, and I kind of have nowhere else to go.”
“Just what every girl wants to hear—let’s hang out because I don’t have anything better to do.” I fake offense.
“I didn’t mean it that way, and you know it.” He laughs off my statement.
“Yeah, yeah.” I let out a long, dramatic sigh. “I mean, I guess I don’t have anything better to do either.” I smile when I see his lips twitch as he fights back a laugh.
“I think I might need a couch to crash on as well; how generous are you feeling?” He crosses to the passenger side of the car and climbs in without waiting for me to respond.
I laugh, shaking my head as I pull open my door and quickly join him in the car.
“Now that might be asking too much,” I tease, clicking my seatbelt in place before firing the engine to life.
“What if I offer to rent it from you?” He bats his thick lashes at me playfully.
“That depends on your form of payment.” I pause, wishing my mind didn’t immediately go somewhere it shouldn’t.
“How about I buy the first round and we go from there,” he offers, his smile still firmly in place.
“Fine, but I must warn you, I’m not much of a drinker anymore, so you’ll need to take it easy on me.”
“I love a cheap date.” He winks, the action doing something strange to my insides.