The smell of fried bacon and maple syrup caused my stomach to grumble like a monster straight out of a horror movie. It screamed, Feeeed meeee.
Stopping in front of the empty hostess station, I stretched up on the tips of my sneakers and scanned the booths for two somewhat familiar heads. The texts from Roxy and Katie had started Saturday evening, and I would’ve agreed to meet them Sunday morning right off the bat, but their escalating pleas and messages had been quite entertaining. At one point Katie had threatened to break into my apartment and draw a mustache on my face if I didn’t come.
The funny part was, I wouldn’t have said no to them. Sure, Katie, whom I’d only met briefly, seemed like she might be missing a few screws, but whatever. Who was I to judge? I missed my old friends and our weekly, or sometimes triweekly¸ meet-ups. Admittedly, I was a social creature most of the time, and the loneliness I’d been wallowing in wasn’t going anywhere.
I spotted Roxy and her blue glasses toward the back of the busy restaurant. The walkways between the booths were crowded with racing kids covered in sticky jelly and older people trying to rein them in as I made my way toward them.
Roxy’s hair was pulled up in a messy bun and her eyes squinted as she glanced up at me. “You seriously went running before you came here. You weren’t lying.”
“Nope. I try to run every day.” I sat beside Katie, who compared to Friday night was dressed down in a baby blue off-the-shoulder sweater that looked like sequins had thrown up on it. Her blond hair was pulled back in a low ponytail at the nape of her neck. “I have to work out,” I explained, placing my purse between Katie and me. “I eat like five starving guys in college. It’s actually embarrassing how much food I can consume in one sitting.”
Katie laughed. “I don’t have that problem. I can eat whatever I want and not gain a pound. Actually, I’d probably lose weight.” Her shoulders rose in a shrug. “Sucks to be you all.”
Roxy scowled at her. “You don’t need to rub it in, you know.”
“Don’t hate me because I was born this way.” Katie grinned when Roxy rolled her eyes. “Maybe it’s Maybelline. Maybe it’s Katie.”
I giggle snorted.
The waitress appeared at our table, clicking the pen she’d pulled out of the pocket of her apron. She took our drink order and then dashed off to fulfill it, her white sneakers squeaking across the floor.
“I’m glad you came,” Roxy said, propping her elbows on the table. “I was worried I was going to have to search you down and force you to come eat with us.”
I laughed again. “I’m pretty sure you’d have a hard time doing that.”
“I’m scrappy.” Roxy grinned. “I could take you.”
Thinking of the shiner I’d first seen her with, I decided she was probably telling the truth. “I’m glad you guys invited me.” I paused while the waitress returned with our drinks before disappearing again, then I said, “So, I know Roxy works at the bar, what about you, Katie?”
“At the club across the street from Mona’s.” Katie dumped a packet of sugar into her coffee and then picked up five more, managing to rip the tops off in one impressive swipe. “It’s a strip club.”
“Oh.” How had I not noticed a strip club across the street from Mona’s?
Katie dumped the sugar in her coffee. “I strip. I don’t dance. I take my clothes off for a living and get paid damn good money for it, too.”
I blinked. “That’s cool.”
Her gaze turned shrewd. “You don’t have a problem with that?”
“Um, not if you don’t.” I glanced at Roxy, who was busy cleaning her glasses, a small smile pulling at her face. I picked up my soda and took a deep drink.
Katie tilted her head to the side, studying me. “Really?”
I lifted a shoulder. “Nope. Honestly. I think it’s pretty cool you have the lady balls to do it.”
A slow grin appeared. “You should do it. You’d make so much money. Hell, I’d pay to see you—”
“Katie,” sighed Roxy, resting her chin in her hand. “Stop trying to recruit rookie strippers. You do this every time you meet someone. No one has agreed yet.”
I grinned as I pictured the odd blonde roaming the city, looking for women who wanted to take their clothes off. “I don’t think I could do it. I’d get up there and then forget how to take my clothes off.”
“Taking your clothes off is the easiest part,” Katie replied seriously.
Roxy looked doubtful. “Those spandex running pants leave very little to the imagination. If I had your body, I’d walk around naked all day.”
“I have no problem getting naked when it’s—I don’t know, an intimate situation,” I announced, “but doing it in public is a different story.”
“That’s good to know,” the waitress said, pen in hand. “Do you guys know what you want to eat?”
“Awkward,” I murmured under my breath as my eyes widened.
Roxy giggled, and we quickly placed our orders. Katie ordered grits and a waffle, and I went with an omelet and a side order of bacon. Roxy went for some kind of fruit thing and a bagel. I watched the waitress zoom away and then said, “Well then . . .”
“I think she needed to know your getting naked preferences,” Roxy said, sitting back against the worn red booth. “So how is it working out at the Lima Academy?”
“You’re surrounded by hot guys from nine to five, right?” Katie perked up, like a bell had been rung. “Especially Brock. Mmm. Goodness. Brock can get all beastie with me anytime he wants,” she said, and I almost spit out my drink when she added, “My vagina would have its own personal landing strip for him.”
“Oh my God,” Roxy whispered as she snickered. “The imagery. I’ll never get it out of my head now.”
I never wanted that imagery in my head. “I actually don’t see a lot of people, and I have yet to meet Brock. I think he’s coming back next week or something, but it’s pretty cool. I’ve been doing a lot of running around, but all and all, it’s what I expected.” I lifted up, sitting with my legs crossed. I always had to. It was weird, but I wouldn’t be comfortable if I didn’t. “Everyone is nice. Well, except these two guys that work in sales.”
“Are they mean or something?” Roxy asked.
I shook my head. “Not really. Just overbearing and douchey. One of them said the only reason why I got hired was because of the way I looked.” Flipping my ponytail over my shoulder, I rolled my eyes. “And he meant that as a compliment. For real. Like I should’ve thanked him for that.”
“Wow.” Roxy frowned and her glasses slipped down her nose. “What an ass.”
“Pretty much.” No arguing that. “He said something about the girl who used to work in my position, but I don’t remember much other than him saying he hoped I didn’t end up like her.”
Blood drained from Roxy’s face so rapidly I jolted forward. “Oh God, are you okay?” I asked, wondering if she had some kind of medical condition.
“Yeah. Yes. It’s just that . . .” She trailed off, straightening her glasses.
“Wait.” Katie wrinkled her nose. “Wasn’t that girl attacked by the Kip Corbin creep?”
“Yeah,” Roxy confirmed quietly.
Something was most definitely going on, and I didn’t have to wait too long before Katie expanded on the details. “If you ask me, a guy with two first names as their first and last name just says bad shit is on the way,” she said, and I pursed my lips together, because that didn’t make a lot of sense to me. “Kip Corbin was this freak who basically stalked Roxy for months and attacked a bunch of other women.”
“What?” My eyes nearly popped out of my head as my voice rose a notch.
Our conversation halted while the waitress brought our food, and all the plates of yummie goodness sat untouched while Roxy fidgeted with her fork. “He was this guy who lived above me,” she said. “Seemed normal. Obviously wasn’t. He was basically a budding serial killer.”
My jaw dropped.
“He attacked a lot of other girls. I was lucky.” She smiled tightly, and again I thought of the bruise I’d seen on her. That was now explained. Good God. Horror swamped me. “Reece showed up in time and . . .” Color hadn’t returned to her cheeks as she stared at her plate of food. “I was very lucky.”
“Total white knight right there.” Katie stabbed her bowl of grits with her fork. “But that girl who used to work at Lima, she was the last executive assistant.”
Holy crap.
And Rick had made the poor woman’s exit sound like it wasn’t a big deal. God, he was grosser than I had given him credit for. One look at Roxy told me she wasn’t doing too well. I reached over and squeezed her hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring it up.”
“It’s okay.” She squeezed my hand back. “You had no way of knowing. And it’s in the past.”
“And Kip Corbin is dead.” Katie shoved a heap of grits into her mouth. “The girl who used to work at Lima was Isaiah’s cousin. And of course, you don’t know who Isaiah is, but you’ll probably meet him at some point at Lima. I think he’s a funder of the academy or something, or whatever you call people who pay for stuff.” She scooped up another mouthful. “Anyway, Isaiah is like the legit mafia. Everyone here knows that. Don’t get on his bad side.”
My gaze swung sharply to Roxy. “For real?”
“For real.” She forked up a strawberry. “Kip ended up hanging himself in jail, but it was real suspicious. No one crosses Isaiah or messes with one of his own.”
Picking up my knife and fork, I started to cut my omelet into absurdly small pieces. Hot UFC fighters. Sexy bartenders. A serial killer. And now a mob boss? This was like a romance novel. Or a Lifetime movie channel. Geez.
“Let’s talk about something else,” I suggested. Relief eased the taut line of Roxy’s shoulders. I searched for something else and settled on familiar grounds—the connection between here and Shepherdstown. “I’m still kind of in shock that you all know everyone from Shepherd. It’s a small world.”
“I know!” Roxy exclaimed, her eyes brightening. “It’s bizarre—amazing—but crazy bizarre. I know they were just as surprised as you were. I know you don’t know Calla well, but I hope you get to hang out with her when she comes back to visit. She usually spends every other weekend here with Jax.”
“That would be cool,” I murmured, forking the omelet into my mouth.
Katie snickered. “You said, as enthused as a kid opening up a package of socks Christmas morning. Why’s that? You don’t like Calla?”
“No. I mean, I like Calla, but, I don’t know her, but . . .”
“But what?” Katie prodded.
Pushing the fluffy yellow stuff around my plate, I didn’t know how to respond, because I wasn’t sure how much Calla had known and told Roxy. I picked up a slice of bacon and crunched away. By the time I finished, I decided to be truthful, because why not?
Wasn’t like I was ashamed of anything Calla could’ve told Roxy.
“I’m not sure if she likes me,” I said, picking up another slice of salty, greasy bacon.
“What?” Roxy’s lips parted as she pushed her glasses back up her nose. “Why would you think that?”
“Well, maybe because I’ve had relations with Cam . . . and Jase at one point.” I went for a drink of cool soda. “Not when they were with Avery or Teresa or anything like that, but . . . yeah, some girls don’t care if that was in the past, before them. And Calla is really close to Teresa.”
“Oh.” Roxy blinked once and then twice. “Calla never mentioned anything like that.”
Pressing my lips together, I resisted the urge to smack myself in the face. Well, perhaps this was an even worse conversation idea. Go Steph! “Well . . .” I raised my hands with a shrug. “Anyway, I’m not really close to any of those girls for that reason.”
“But all of them seemed super excited to see you,” Roxy insisted, frowning. “None of them were catty or gave you the side eye. And I notice all cattiness from a mile away. It’s like a special radar I have.”
Hmm. Maybe they were cool with me? But I wasn’t even sure Teresa knew about Jase and my one and only hookup. I knew Avery had found out about Cam, but Avery was always hard to read. Maybe I should’ve just kept my mouth shut about all of this. I barely knew these girls and I just told them I’d hooked up with two random guys they knew.
I went back to pushing my omelet on my plate. “You probably think that sounds slutty—”
“No. I don’t,” Roxy stated firmly. “Not to me.”
My lips curved up in a smile. “Contrary to what some might believe, the list of guys I’ve been with isn’t as long as my arm.”
“Mine is as long as my leg,” Katie replied and then tipped her head back. Her brows furrowed together. “Well, wait. Probably as long as both legs and an arm.”
“Wow,” murmured Roxy, appearing impressed.
“Sounds like you have me beat.” My smile raised a notch as I peeked at her. “But it’s weird being close to them—Avery and Teresa. Which is strange, because one of my other friends—Yasmine—she’d messed around with Cam, too, and it’s not weird for us.”
“Was Yasmine in love with Cam and Cam in love with her?” Roxy asked. “Because if not, then that probably explains it.” She popped a piece of cantaloupe into her mouth. “And you weren’t in love with him either, right?”
“Nope. Good point.”
“I bet some chicks think you’re a real tramp.” Katie laughed.
My smile slipped off my face. “Well, yeah, I’m sure some do. Actually, I know some do.” Suddenly, I thought of Nikki Glenn, a girl who was in my English 102 class my second semester at Shepherd. “This one girl, a couple of years ago, wrote ‘vengeful tramp’ in shaving cream on the hood of my car.”
Roxy’s eyes widened behind the glasses. “Oh, wow.”
“In September, during a heat spell.” Pursing my lips, I nodded. “Yep. I ended up having to get a paint job. That doesn’t come off. And just imagine the looks I got when I drove the car into the body shop.”
“Did you sleep with her man or kick her dog into traffic?” Katie asked.
It was my turn to laugh. “No. I’ve never slept with a guy—at least knowingly—that was involved with someone else. Nor have I kicked any animal. This girl was mad because I was friends with her boyfriend. I’d known him for years, long before she came into the picture. We went to high school together and had gone to homecoming as each other’s dates one year. That was it. According to her, based on my reputation, I’d slept with every guy I’ve ever talked to.” I paused, thinking back. “Ironically, they are no longer together and I still chat with the guy whenever we see each other.”
I shrugged a shoulder. “The funny thing is, Donnie—that was the girl’s boyfriend—he was such a player before he met Nikki. Now he is probably someone who has two legs and two arms worth of girls he’d been with, and she didn’t have a problem with him sleeping with an entire zip code worth of chicks, but boy did she have one with me, and I hadn’t even so much as kissed the dude on the cheek.”
“They never do,” was Katie’s sagelike reply.
“I don’t get it.” Roxy slathered a continent-sized amount of cream cheese on her bagel. “Like why would anyone care who someone was with if it was in the past and everyone was safe about it? Consensual sex or whatever between two people isn’t shocking. I don’t walk around thinking Reece has never been with anyone but me, and he knows I’ve been with other guys before. And I know damn well Avery and Teresa don’t think their guys haven’t been with anyone else. That whole mentality is stupid.”
“Yeah, it is,” I murmured, staring at my plate as an old burning sensation picked up in my gut. What people thought of me, especially virtual strangers who had absolutely no impact on my life, didn’t bother me most of the time. But I genuinely liked Cam and Jase, so that meant I liked their girlfriends by extension, and . . . yes, I wanted to be liked by them, too. I didn’t want them to think I was lurking in the shadows somewhere, about to pounce on their guys. Truthfully, though, there were times when the opinions of virtual strangers like that of Nikki Glenn did get to me. Moments when whispered words and harsh looks had cut deeper than they should—moments when words like “slut” and “whore” were laced with enough venom to take me down.
I’ll never really understand it, I realized as I sat there, staring at the red and green flecks of the leftover peppers, why others’ sexual habits bothered people—especially other women—so much. Of all people, you’d think women would be more tolerant of other women’s choices, but sadly, a lot aren’t. In a lot of ways they could be worse than the guys. It wasn’t like I was sitting in judgment over those who waited for marriage or believed sex automatically equaled love. I could care less if someone had two partners or fifty. So why did they have to?
“You know what? Fuck ’em,” Katie replied, moving onto the waffle that was as wide as her plate. “That’s my motto. Because here’s the deal. They hate on you because you had mutual, consensual humping with some guys who weren’t even involved with anyone, while they worship the dirty-ass ground the guy walks on, like they slipped and fell into your vagina, for doing the same thing? That’s what we like to call dumb double standards, and what we in the business like to also call ‘Mind your own business.’ No matter how many times it’s explained to those kind of people, they aren’t going to understand. Never. Dude, that’s their problem. Not yours.”
“True,” Roxy said, nodding.
“Women are each other’s worst enemy, you know?” Katie continued. “Wives and girlfriends all the time come into the club, pissed off at me, because their husband or boyfriend came there on his own free will. Like, just because I strip, I want to get with their goofy ass husbands.” She rolled her blue eyes so far back I worried they’d get stuck. “And if doing that and having safe and fun times with available dudes makes me a slut, I have no problem getting that tattooed on my middle finger.”
Suddenly, without any one reason I could put my finger on, the back of my eyes started to burn, and I think I fell a little in love with Roxy and Katie at that moment.
These were my people.
Roxy’s gaze bounced from Katie to me, and her smile turned soft and mischievous. “Speaking of guys who are players, players, I have to bring up Nick.”
A strange pressure clenched my chest as I scooped up the last of my omelet. Nick. Oh, Nicky boy. I was so doing my best to not think of him and his parting words.
That you and I are the way we are.
What in the hell was that supposed to mean and why was it a shame? And why did he have to be so freaking hot and really shitty when it came to dealing with the opposite sex? Ugh. Double and triple ugh.
“Yeah,” Katie said. “Now let’s get to the good stuff.” She twisted toward me. “So you and Nick hooked up. Congrats on that. I imagine that was a good and decent hard fucking.”
The fluffy egg and diced bell peppers I’d just eaten almost got stuck in my throat. I swallowed quickly and then dragged in air. “What?”
Finished with her food, Roxy pinned me with a no nonsense stare that would’ve made my mama proud. “We know you hooked up with him.”
“Did he tell you that?” I blurted out.
Roxy grinned. “No, but you just confirmed what we already knew.”
My eyes narrowed. Dammit. “If he didn’t, then how did you know?”
“Because of what he said to you when he saw you Friday night in the bar,” Katie explained. “He didn’t expect you to come back. Therefore, that means y’all did the nasty. That’s his M.O.”
“You guys know about his . . . I guess, his rule?” I started to fiddle with the wrapper the straw had come in, folding it like an accordion. Although I had sincerely forgiven him, anger brewed. “Did everyone know about that except me?”
“Well, everyone who knows him does.” Roxy’s brows knitted as she studied me. “He didn’t set up ground rules or something before you all got down to business?”
This was such a weird conversation, when I thought about it. “Not really. At least not in a way that I understood what he was saying. Having a rule where a girl can’t go back to the bar after sleeping with him is about the dumbest thing I’d ever heard of.”
“You’d be surprised by how many chicks he’s hooked up with who’re totally okay with it,” Roxy replied dryly, and then leaned forward, placing her elbows on the table. “But as long as they’re cool with it, too, whatever, but man, when you told him off at the bar, it was freaking priceless. Don’t get me wrong. I consider Nick a friend, and we get along because we’re just friends, but I wished I had thought to record that.”
I’m glad she hadn’t.
“I’m so disappointed I missed that.” Katie sighed heavily. “But you gave him hell. He needs that. Hell, most people need that every now and then.”
“Oh man, and when he jumped over the bar to stop you from leaving?” Roxy fanned her face with her hand. “I need to get Reece to do that at least once a week for me.”
I coughed out a laugh. “Yeah, that was kind of impressive.”
“And I also missed that.” Katie pouted. “Such bullshit.”
Roxy grinned. “So are you going to give us the details?”
“Apparently you all already know everything.” I straightened out my straw wrapper and then began folding it again. “Not many details left.”
“There’s always detail,” Katie corrected. “But I don’t have to ask if he’s good or not, because one look at him tells me he’s good at it.”
A flush stained Roxy’s cheeks. “And that’s not the kind of detail we’re asking for. I know he went to see you after he left Mona’s Friday night. His car was in the condo parking lot.”
So he did drive a car. I shook my head. “He did stop by Friday night, but we didn’t do anything. He actually came over to apologize to me.”
Roxy’s brows climbed her forehead as she exchanged a look with Katie. “Say what?”
I glanced at the bedazzled girl next to me. “He came over to apologize for the way he acted.” I paused. “Obviously, that must be shocking behavior for him.”
“Shocking doesn’t really even cover it.” Roxy blinked a couple of times. “Did he try to get some after apologizing?”
“Not really,” I answered, letting the wrapper uncurl in my palm.
“Whoa,” Katie murmured.
I wasn’t sure if the whoa was a good or bad thing. “He seemed genuinely apologetic, to be honest. We chatted for a little while and then he left, but he did say something along the lines of me coming back to the bar.”
“Whoa,” repeated Roxy.
“Is this all really that surprising?” I sat back, dropping the wrapper on my plate.
Roxy nodded slowly. “Yeah, for Nick it is. Look, I don’t know how to say this nicely, but—”
“He’s a dick?” I finished for her, and when she winced, I had to fight the grin. “Trust me, I know he’s a dick. I’ve never in my life had a guy act like that after we got together. And I’ve only forgiven him because, like I said, he seemed genuinely sorry. That doesn’t erase how he acted, though.”
“Yeah, he’s a dick,” Roxy said. “But he can be a really nice guy. Nick was there for me when I was dealing with that . . . that creep, but he’s got relationship issues,” she finished.
“I don’t think he’s a bad guy,” I said. “I just think he’s not relationship material.”
Roxy was silent for a moment as she smoothed her hand over her hair, stopping when she reached the topknot. “I honestly think I’m his only female friend. He hardly talks to Calla. It’s kind of weird. It’s like she doesn’t exist to him.”
Okay, that was weird. I thought about how he believed he met the “one” but had been wrong. Was it Calla? I didn’t know enough about her to even hazard a guess at that possibility.
“But that’s just how he is.” Roxy’s brow creased as she continued. “And we’re not even that close. He’s not the most talkative guy. Sometimes he goes through spells when he is, but mostly, he’s kind of quiet, like an observer.”
Come to think of it, he hadn’t been real talkative the first night we got together. Then again, both of us had other things on our minds. “He was pretty talkative Friday night.”
“That’s pretty telling.” Roxy’s forehead smoothed out. “When you walked back into the bar Friday night, I just knew something was going to go down between you two.”
“Of course you did, because I called it the first night Steph walked in the bar.”
I turned to Katie. “You did?”
“Remember. I’m kind of psychic.” She tapped her finger off her temple. “I called it.”
“She did,” Roxy confirmed, grinning gleefully, while I’m sure I had What the Hell written all over my face. “Katie told Nick that someone was coming into the bar who he was going to fall for and he was going to meet his match. Guess what?”
“What?” I said wryly.
“You strolled right on in that night.” She clapped her hands excitedly. “And here we are.”
For a moment all I could do was stare, and then I laughed. Some of the weird comments Roxy and Katie had made when I first met them now made sense. “I don’t see why this is such a big deal. Nick’s a player who normally doesn’t apologize or act decent to chicks he’s slept with. Knowing that doesn’t make him more alluring in my book. And even you said he was a dick.”
“Well, no shit, but the fact that he is acting different with you means something,” Roxy countered, and then she squinted. “Unless you don’t want it to mean anything.”
“She doesn’t,” Katie answered, and my gaze swung to hers sharply. “She’s going to break his heart.”
I stared at her, absolutely dumbfounded. “I am not going to break anyone’s heart.”
“Oh, you will. You won’t mean to, but it’s going to happen.” She was serious, and a sad look crept into her features as she met my stare. “Yeah, it’s going to happen.”
Shaking my head, I turned to Roxy. She was staring at Katie with this perplexed look on her face. I threw up my hands. “Why are we even having this conversation? Just because I accepted his apology and he appears to want to be friends doesn’t mean either of us are entertaining the idea of going there again.”
“People can change,” Roxy said.
I shot her a bland look. “Please don’t tack ‘for the right person’ on the end of that.”
She made a face. “No. I was going to tack ‘when they want to’ on the end of that.”
“Oh.” I flashed a brief grin. “That sounds more believable, but still, it doesn’t matter. Maybe Nick and I will be friends at some point, but that’s it. I don’t think our paths are going to cross a lot outside of visiting you.”
“I don’t know about that,” Katie said, and when she looked at me, the unwarranted and strange sadness lingered on her pretty face. “I don’t think you’re going to have a choice when it comes down to it.”