Chapter Thirty-Three

 

 

ADAM arrived at the house a little before eight. Roger’s car was already there, as well as another car—a bright blue Nissan Leaf with the dealer’s tag still on it. Adam smiled. Karen had been talking about trading in her SUV for something more practical for the past few months. He’d told her kids meant upsizing. Minivans. She’d made a face and sworn she’d never buy a mom taxi. He shook his head and chuckled. She’d figure out only too soon what a mistake not buying the Chevy Cruze was.

Adam entered the house to the sound of laughter and lively conversation. “I’ll be down in a minute,” he said as he climbed the stairs and made his way to his room. He kicked off his shoes and traded his work clothing for sweats. He slipped on a pair of flip-flops from the closet only to discover a bit of sand between his foot and the shoe bed. He smiled at the memory the sand evoked, then just as quickly put it out of his mind.

Once downstairs he headed for the back porch. His mother had always loved to make them dinner on Friday night when his father was still alive. Adam had come to cherish those evenings, especially in the spring when the grapes bloomed and everything looked so green. Maybe with a grandchild on the way, his mother would decide to stay in Napa at least part of the year.

“Sorry I’m late,” Adam said as he walked onto the porch. “Traffic was worse than I—”

For a moment he wondered if he was imagining things, because seated between Karen and his mother was Jonah. Smiling and entirely at ease.

“What are you doing here?” he demanded, more out of shock than anger.

“That’s hardly the way to greet a dinner guest,” his mother said. She glanced at Karen, and the two shared a knowing, we-got-him look.

“Guest?”

Damn that smile! He wouldn’t fall for it. Not this time. Jonah had his own mess to clean up. Maybe if he figured out what the hell he wanted….

“I hope you don’t mind,” Jonah said. “Your mother invited me.”

“She did?”

“And why not?” his mother asked, indignant. “This is my house, isn’t it?”

Technically it was. And hearing her own it, quite literally, gave Adam hope. Hope that quickly turned to irritation. “I still don’t see why you—”

Jonah stood. “I should leave. I appreciate the offer, Katherine, but I think it’s best I—”

“You’ll stay,” Adam’s mother said emphatically, and she waited until Jonah sat back down.

“Then I should probably leave,” Adam put in.

“No.” Karen this time. Next to her, her husband, Ken, chuckled.

“Am I missing something?” Adam asked, his gaze set on Jonah. “Much as I appreciate what Mr. Roth did for us—”

“Please call me Jonah.”

Damn those amazing blue eyes and the way they seemed to sparkle when the man smiled! “Jonah,” Adam began again. “I appreciate how you went to bat for Prestco. I really do. But I—”

“Can we speak in private, please?” Jonah asked. “And if you want me to leave after that, I promise I will. No questions asked.”

“Seems reasonable,” Adam’s mother said. She was still smiling.

“Okay.” What was he supposed to say? He poured himself a glass of wine, took a long drink, and set the glass down, then motioned Jonah to follow him.

“This is nice,” Jonah said as they walked into the library and Adam closed the door behind them. “You have quite the collection.” He ran reverent fingers over the spines of some of the books, pausing from time to time to read some of the titles.

“My father loved to read. He always bought us books for our birthdays, and sometimes he’d secretly add them to the library. We’d check every day to see what turned up.” Adam smiled in spite of himself. “It was a great way to hook us on reading.” He gestured to the modern desk in the corner and added, “This is my study now.”

Why was he even saying this to Jonah? Whatever they’d been to each other, it was over and done with. They both needed to move on.

“That reminds me of my father,” Jonah said. He pressed his lips together as if willing away the emotions that accompanied his memories. “There were bookshelves everywhere in our house when I was a kid.”

Adam wasn’t sure what to say. “I’m glad you remember him,” he managed.

“I am too.” Jonah’s eyes sparkled for a moment. “Do you mind if we sit?”

“Sure.”

“I still miss him.” Jonah sat facing Adam on one of the club chairs. “My father….” He breathed deeply as though steadying himself. “He was the reason I ran away.”

“Your father?”

Jonah nodded. “He died a few days before. We… we weren’t on the best of terms.”

“I’m sorry.” Adam was. It didn’t take much to imagine how he might have felt if the same had been true when his father passed away.

“He told me I’d become a different person. That I was cruel. That all I cared about was money. Success.” Jonah ran a hand through his hair. For the first time, Adam noticed he’d cut it since the meeting, although it was still longer than it had been in the photographs of Jackson before he’d gone missing. “He was right. I was all those things.

“You know how it is when you lose someone,” Jonah continued. “You can never go back and fix the things you said you’d fix. Say the things you should have said.” A muscle in Jonah’s cheek gave a telltale twitch. “They’re just gone, and you have to live with things the way they were. No do-overs.”

“Yeah. I get that. And I’m really sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Jonah’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “I was given a gift, in spite of my stupidity.”

“A gift?”

“A second chance. When I lost my memories, I wasn’t Jackson anymore. I really was Jonah. And now….”

“Now you’re Jackson Roth. CEO of Entech. Married to your business partner.” Adam had to say it, more for himself than for Jonah’s benefit. He needed to remember that what they’d had in the Caribbean wasn’t reality. This was their reality.

“Actually,” Jonah said, “that wasn’t exactly what I was going to say.”

“Oh?”

“I was going to say that I’d never have met you if Jonah hadn’t existed. And that sometimes you get more than just one second chance.”

Adam wouldn’t give in to the temptation of believing that things between them might turn out differently. And he needed something more than the sip of wine he’d had at the table to steady the whirlpool of emotions that seeing Jonah awakened.

“Something to drink?” he asked.

“Sure. Whatever you have is fine.”

Adam poured them both some whiskey, then handed one to Jonah. Their fingers touched, and for a long moment, Adam hesitated. Then he forced himself to break the contact. Jonah took the glass as Adam returned to his seat.

“I’ve been a bit persistent lately, haven’t I?” Jonah asked after they’d both taken a sip of the alcohol.

“You could say that.” Adam probably should have called Jonah on the change of topic, but he didn’t. He sensed Jonah’s need to come clean, and he knew he needed this too. They both needed to clear the air between them before they could move on with their separate lives.

“I’m sorry. I really needed to speak with you, and it wasn’t something I could leave a detailed message about.”

“We’ve been there, done that on the subject of your marriage,” Adam pointed out, irritation flaring once again. “I don’t see what more talking will accomplish.”

“Things have changed.”

Three words, and Adam’s heart took off at a gallop. Why the fuck did he let this man get under his skin time after time? “Okay. I’m sure you’ll get around to telling me how.”

Jonah frowned and sipped from his glass. “I know I hurt you. I wish to hell things had been different. I didn’t—”

“You owe me nothing.”

“You’re wrong.” Jonah released an audible breath. “I owe you more than you’ll ever know.”

Adam took a drink of the whiskey and savored the burn at the back of his throat. The tension in his shoulders and jaw began to recede.

“I didn’t remember marrying Phil,” Jonah said. “I still don’t.”

“I see.” Why had he said that when he didn’t see? “I’m sure these things take time,” he added, feeling like a complete fool. He sipped his whiskey and hoped the heat in his cheeks hadn’t translated into a full-on blush.

“No,” Jonah said. “They don’t take time.”

“I don’t understand.” At least that’s the honest truth!

“It doesn’t take time to remember something that never happened.”

Jonah’s words sank in slowly. “What?”

“The marriage never happened,” Jonah repeated.

“Never happened? But…?”

“I ran away without thinking about the consequences. And when I didn’t come back, Phil had to fight to keep control of the company.” Jonah briefly closed his eyes. “In a sense, I left Phil no choice but to do what he did.”

“I remembering hearing on the news a few months back that they’d started proceedings to have you declared legally dead.”

“Without my shares, Phil would have lost control of the company.” Jonah finished his drink and set it on the side table.

“He faked the marriage.” The wave of relief that washed over Adam mingled with disbelief.

“Yes. He told everyone we’d gotten married years before and that we’d hidden it because we didn’t want the publicity to hurt the bottom line.” Jonah laughed and shook his head. “It’s something I could almost imagine myself doing.”

“I don’t think you—”

“Think again. Because I would have considered doing something like that. When I was Jackie. And wherever this conversation takes us, you really do need to know that I was the world’s biggest asshole. No hyperbole.”

“How did you figure it out?” Adam wasn’t ready to think about the consequences of the truth or whether any of what Jackie had done mattered. He needed the entire story, and he needed time to digest it all.

“I had a strange feeling about it,” Jonah explained. “The other memories came back in waves. Like a daisy chain. One memory led to the next and…. Well you get it, right?”

“Makes sense.”

“But my memories of marrying Phil… I didn’t have any. Not even a hint of one. And the house we supposedly picked out together—I didn’t remember it. At all. So I did a little research and found nothing. Not a scrap of evidence in my notes, my calendar. No photos. Nothing.”

“Did he deny making the story up?”

“He gave in pretty quickly when he realized I wasn’t buying it.”

“I’m sorry. He was a good friend, wasn’t he?” Adam got up and put a hand on Jonah’s shoulder. The intimate contact felt familiar. Natural.

“He was. I hope he will be again. Someday.”

Neither of them spoke. Silence stretched like a chasm between them. Adam knew what he needed to say, but finding the words took more effort than he’d expected.

“I’m glad you figured things out,” Adam said finally, “but I don’t understand why you’re here.”

“What do you want?” Jonah asked.

The question took Adam by surprise. “Want? Me?”

“In a perfect world. Let’s say you can do what you want when you want. What would that be?”

“I don’t know.” Adam wished he had an answer.

“I want to be Jonah.” Jonah laughed. “Crazy as it sounds. I wish I was back at the dive shop, cleaning up the sand. Waiting for the next group of divers.”

“What’s stopping you?”

“Good question.” Jonah stood and faced Adam. He took Adam’s hands in his. “But it’s easy to answer. I can’t go back there.”

“No, I guess not. So you’ll go back to running Entech?”

“No.”

That was the last thing Adam expected to hear. “Then what…?”

Jonah lifted Adam’s right hand to his face and kissed it. “Whatever I want. I’ll need to lie low until the divorce is final.”

“Divorce? But you were never married.”

“That’s true. But if I tell the world the truth, what do I get?” Jonah asked. “Whatever he’s done, Phil’s really good at his job. Maybe he needs a little push in the right direction, but he’s as good as they come.”

“You’d let him stay on, knowing what he’s done?” Adam had a hard time wrapping his brain around that one.

“I learned the hard way that punishing people for their mistakes doesn’t make me happy. It’s also not very good for business.” Jonah leaned in, his lips just inches from Adam’s. “Besides, I’ve made so many mistakes myself. Not the least of which….”

“We barely know each other.” Stating the painfully obvious, but Adam didn’t know how else to respond with Jonah this close to him. It was as if his brain had frozen and with it, his body.

“We know each other better than a lot of people. The rest, we’ll figure out.” Jonah kissed Adam, who sighed and kissed him back with a ferocity that scared him half to death. “Some things just feel right.”

“Another second chance?” Adam whispered.

“Could be. Depending on how you answer the next question.”

“What’s the question?” Adam wasn’t sure he could handle winner-take-all.

“Can we eat dinner now?” Jonah grinned. “I hear your mother makes a hell of a lasagna.”

“That’s the question?” Adam laughed and shoved Jonah playfully.

“It’s a question. But I guess there’s another one lurking.”

“I’m waiting.” Adam leaned in and brushed his lips over Jonah’s.

“You’re a tease.”

“I’m a tease?”

“Okay, okay.” Jonah’s smile faded and his expression grew serious. Earnest, even. “Will you give me a chance to show you who I really am? Warts and all?”

“When you put it like that….”

“Is that a yes?” Jonah asked.

“Yes. But it’s not like I don’t have warts of my own, you know.” Adam pulled Jonah close and held him. He didn’t care that the entire situation was about as surreal as it could get. He didn’t want Jonah to disappear from his life.

“Good.” Jonah kissed Adam’s neck, causing Adam to hiss with pleasure. “How about we eat some dinner? I’m starving.”