Bellamy

 

It was so good to see him like this.

It was something I honestly didn’t think I would see so soon, but here we were. I smiled as I watched him, curled up in the center of the big bed with Charlie at my feet. He was a cross between an excited little boy and a man buzzed on really good liquor.

“I’m gonna have to get all my gear, make sure it’s all still good,” he said into the phone. “Hell, maybe I should get new gear.”

He paused, listening.

“Yeah, yeah. Maybe call them up.” He stopped mid-pacing and made a face. “You think they would do that? I don’t know.”

He glanced up at the ceiling as if he was surprised as Joiner said whatever he was saying in his ear. Liam began pacing again, a caged animal wanting to run.

“No shit?” he swore, turning and glancing at me. “All my old sponsors still want to work with me. Under Armour is making me some custom shit for my knee.”

I grinned widely. “They know a sure bet when they see it.”

His teeth flashed, and he chuckled. To Joiner, he remarked, “No, I’ll call Chevy myself. They’ve been too good to me.”

I listened to him and Joiner prattle on about everything humanly possible that was related to snowboarding and marveled at the fact they’d already spent several hours together at the pipe. They acted as though they had to plan everything in one night.

I sighed loudly, and Charlie lifted his head to stare at me. “Little boys and their toys,” I told him, scratching behind his ear.

The phone Liam had been talking on landed on the end of the bed with a thump. “Whachya say about me?” he asked, raising a brow.

“Nothing,” I replied sweetly.

My body bounced when he leapt on the bed and near tackled me. Charlie jumped up with a bark, and we all ended up in a pile on the mattress with me on the bottom. Of course, Liam made sure he held his own weight and the weight of the giant dog.

I squeaked and squirmed, making Liam chuckle and tickle me.

“Get him, Charlie!” I wailed, and the dog slobbed up Liam’s arm good.

“That’s nasty!” he insisted and sat back on his haunches. Charlie stood over me, wagging his tail and drooling everywhere.

Liam tugged the shirt he was wearing over his head and used it to mop up his arm. I lost interest in the game when his bare chest entered the equation. I didn’t know how someone could look so warm and smooth when they had snow in their veins.

Liam noted how I stared, and a knowing smile transformed his face into a smug expression. Both hands planted on either side of me, and he leaned down.

Just as he was finally about to kiss me, his face screwed up and he drew back. “What the fu—” His voice fell away when he picked something out of the bed and made a face. “Woman, you’re leaving them nasty raisins in my bed,” he said, showing me the wrinkly fruit.

I giggled.

Charlie leaned over and ate it out of his fingers.

“Good boy!” I crooned as he went around sniffing for more.

“Probably gonna give him diarrhea,” Liam quipped.

I smacked him. “They aren’t that bad!”

“What else you got hidden in this bed?” he purred, leaning down to scoop me against his chest and roll. “Anything for me?”

His mouth covered mine before I could say anything, making the rest of the world fall away for a few quiet moments. Our legs entwined against the blankets, my hair sliding over my shoulders and brushing against his face. Liam didn’t brush it aside or move against it. He put a palm against the back of my head and pulled me closer.

Liam was pretty much an expert with his tongue. He turned a French kiss into a dance, into seduction. With every stroke and lick, I became more electrified.

As he pulled back, he tugged my upper lip with him, not so committed to ending the kiss. I felt a little fuzzy when I blinked down at him, our gazes hidden from the rest of the room thanks to the curtain of my hair.

“It’s good to see you like this.”

“Like what?” he murmured, stroking my cheekbone with his thumb.

“Happy.”

Shadows moved over his face, robbing just a little of that peace I’d seen before.

“It feels like a betrayal to feel anything but sorrow.”

I smiled gently and rubbed over his stubble. “I know. But your father wouldn’t want that. This is what he wanted. You filled with energy and determination. You living your life.”

“Can you believe that pipe?” he asked, wonder coming into his stare. His lips curled up a little.

I almost felt a little jealous of that pipe. At its ability to bring him back to life like this. At the same time, I was so grateful. I wished Ren could be here to see him light up.

I smiled. “I’m so happy you’re going to be using it. That you finally admitted how much you needed to do this.”

Liam deserved so much more than to spend the rest of his life wondering what if.

Quickly, he rolled, coming over me, his steady, intense stare looming over mine. “You know I never could do this without you, right?”

I rolled my eyes. “You, Mr. To The Extreme, could do this in your sleep.”

His grin flashed quickly. “You know what they used to call me, do you?” Then he whisper-sang, “Stalker.”

I laughed low. “I told you I followed your career.”

Liam leaned down and kissed my forehead, allowing his lips to linger against my skin. My eyes fluttered closed, and I wondered how the hell I lasted eight years without him.

When he pulled back, there was a serious note in his eyes. “Once, I could have done this in my sleep, but not now. Too much has happened. It’s so fucking intimidating,”

I tilted my head. “You? Intimidated? Of what?”

“Going back. Worrying that I won’t be able to live up to the name I held before. To the boarder I was. What if my days of being the best are over? What if my knee just won’t perform, and instead of going out because my knee took me out, I go out because I just don’t have it anymore.”

I made a soft sound and wiggled until my arms were free and could loop around his neck. “I have never met anyone harder on themselves. I’ve never known anyone to be so confident yet at the same time fight for control.”

“To the extreme,” he quipped.

I smiled ‘cause it was funny.

And true.

I closed one eye and squinted at him through the other. “Wanna know what I think?”

“Duh,” he mouthed.

“Let go. Do this for the love of it. Because it feels good.” I reached out and touched the sides of his lips. “Because it makes you smile like nothing else does.”

He frowned. “That’s not true.” He grasped my hand and turned his face to kiss the palm. “You make me smile like that, too.”

I smiled, but his frown intensified.

“I will not have you thinking that boarding makes me happier than you,” he demanded.

“I don’t—”

Liam cut me off. “Because I could never board again, and I would still be happy as long as I had you.” He gripped me tighter. “I mean it, Bells. I wouldn’t even be going back if you weren’t here to support me. You make me feel like anything is possible.”

I melted beneath the words, and I admit it was nice to hear because sometimes Liam seemed so hard to reach I couldn’t tell if I loved him enough.

A low swear floated over my head. “Baby, you are more than enough. I’m sorry as hell I ever made you feel like you weren’t.”

I gasped, feeling my eyes widen.

He smirked. “Yeah, you said that out loud.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“I’m glad you did because it’s how you feel, and I need to know this shit.”

I rolled my eyes. “You have enough on your plate without worrying about my hormonal thoughts.”

“The only thing on my plate that matters is you and my baby.”

“I just want—” Stupid tears sprang into my stupid eyes. I blinked them away, not wanting them.

“What do you want?” he whispered, kissing my cheek.

“I want you to know how much I love you. How much I’ve always loved you since that first moment you found me staring up at the lift, scared as crap.”

He laughed. “You were practically green with fear.”

“I was not.” I protested, even though I totally was. “I feel bad for everything I’ve cost you,” I whispered, sharing one of my most painful thoughts. I knew we talked about it before, but this was just so hard to let go of.

He dropped his forehead to mine. “You’ve given me so much more than I even thought you could.”

My voice wobbled with emotion I tried to hold back. “I watched you reading that letter today from your dad. It bruised my heart, watching the emotion play over your face. I took that from you.”

“Can I tell you something? Something that will make me sound like a terrible man.”

“You can tell me anything.”

“Sometimes I wonder if Dad dying this way was better. If having it be fairly quick was easier than watching him slowly waste away with cancer.”

My throat constricted. “Oh, Liam, that’s not terrible. That just shows how much you love him.”

A distressed sound broke from his throat. “You mean being glad he was murdered?”

“No!” I said firmly. “Being glad he suffered far less than he might have. Being glad he died on his own terms, not because of some horrible disease.”

“It wasn’t on his terms. It was Crone.” Frosty was a kind way to describe the sound of his voice.

Chills raced up my spine, and I shivered. “You scare me when you talk about him.”

His eyes flashed, and he glanced away, blowing out a breath. “I hate him, Bells. I hate him, and I won’t lie and say anything else.”

“I hate him, too.” I confessed. “He took both our fathers.”

Liam’s jaw clenched and the skin around his eyes tightened. “I’ll be damned if I let him take anything else from either of us.”

“He won’t. He said so in the note he sent.”

Liam made a rude noise. “Yet you still practically jump out of your skin when the wind blows sideways or someone knocks on the door.”

“I spent a long time running. A long time looking over my shoulder. Part of me wonders if that reflex will ever go away.” I rationalized.

“It might be over,” Liam murmured, hunching around me like a shield. “But you’re still suffering.”

“We all are,” I added.

“It’s exactly what he wanted,” Liam intoned.

“So you believe him?” I asked. He pulled back and stared down at me. “Do you believe Crone will finally leave us alone?”

“Yeah, I do. The bastard gets off on knowing we have to live with the mess he made.”

“Well, you know what they say,” I said, dragging a hand through his soft, messy hair.

“What’s that?”

“The best revenge is a life well lived.”

Liam didn’t say anything. Instead, he kissed me. I wasn’t sure if that meant he agreed or if perhaps he was trying to distract me.