Chapter Nine
Lyla
Every once in a while, I’d bump into Beck, but he’d just laugh and steady me, so I figured he didn’t mind. My head felt pleasantly floaty, and I was pretty proud of the fact that I wasn’t even slightly nauseous. Weirdly enough, standing still and walking were way more challenging than dancing right now. It was like the beat told my body where to go when it wasn’t sure, and I was already swaying, so I just went with it. Man, I loved to dance!
Near the end of the second song, Beck gave me a funny look, the line of his jaw tight. His chest rose and then fell with a deep breath, almost like he was fortifying himself.
“What?” I asked, trying to stop swaying and totally failing until I put a hand on his arm.
He shook his head. “Nothing.”
“Just tell me, I can take it.” I cringed, already expecting the worst. “I’ve been singing too loud, right? When I get excited, I really belt it out, which is bad, because I’m totally tone deaf.”
The crooked smile he gave me eased the anxiety trying to work its way through my happy buzz. “The singing’s fine. I like how you make up your own lyrics instead of singing the right ones.” He put his hand on my hip, pulled me close, and hovered his lips next to my ear. My stomach crawled up to my throat and I wrapped my hand around his biceps, my thumb running across the curve there. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew this was a bad idea, but the other sensations were louder—racing pulse, fuzzy pleasantness, his firm body pressed against me, his hand sliding around to rest on my back. “You’ve got several guys checking you out, and you’re wasting all your cute on me. Why don’t you go circulate?”
Beck stepped back, his sudden absence a shock to my revved up body. Other guys? Huh?
Then I noticed two girls eye-humping him, and they didn’t look like they’d mind sharing him, either. He glanced their way and then slowly back at me.
“Right. You want to meet girls.” That sufficiently doused the happy from my mood. I shook my head, feeling like a moron. Stupid alcohol, glorious one moment and making you think idiotic thoughts about one of your closest friends the next. “I’ve gotten in your way a lot lately. I wasn’t even thinking. Go, pick up a girl, or at least get a few numbers. I’ll be fine on my own for a bit.”
“Lyla, that’s not it. It’s not like I can’t go without for a while.” He curled his hand around the brim of his baseball cap, molding it the way he did when he needed to keep his hands busy. “I just wasn’t sure if you were going to check another item off your list. Wasn’t that what this party’s all about?”
Sure. Check everything off now so he wouldn’t have to spend every weekend plastered to my side, basically babysitting me. How embarrassing that I thought he was having fun, too. I worked to sound as casual as possible. “Yeah, and I definitely want to accomplish my list this semester, but…” I glanced at all the people, but between the spinning and the music and the lights, dizziness set in, tilting the floor under my feet.
Beck reached for me right as someone knocked into me from behind, and I ended up having to brace my hands on his chest. Holy muscles, Batman. It’s like hitting a wall. A warm, solid, smokin’ hot wall.
He gripped both of my arms, just above the elbow, and tingly zips of heat spread from his touch and skittered across my skin. “We can keep dancing, if that’s what you want. I’m down for whatever.”
I licked my lips, trying to wade through my sluggish thoughts. “No, you’re right. No time like the present. When you’re as behind as I am, missing an opportunity isn’t an option.”
Suddenly I did feel a little nauseated. I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol, or the dancing, or the weirdo attraction vibes. Maybe I just needed to be drunker. Yeah, that must be it. “I’m gonna go grab another drink. You mingle, I’ll mingle. We’ll meet in the middle.”
“Are you sure?” he asked, his large hands still fully wrapped around my arms and making me feel things I shouldn’t.
Which meant I needed to be drunker and put space between us before I did something stupid like try to kiss a beautiful not-stranger, who would then decide we couldn’t be friends anymore. “It’s a party. I appreciate you being the more responsible one, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. See you in a bit.”
With every step I took away from him, the more like myself I felt. Wait. The point is to not feel like myself, though. Thoughts weren’t connecting like they should, but when a cute guy stopped me and asked me if I wanted a drink, I said sure.
We headed over to the table overflowing with alcohol, exchanging names on the way. By the end of the heavy-on-the-vodka red drink, and a conversation that was too out of focus for me to really follow, the world had blurred into nothing more than colors and sounds, reality melting away with it.
…
I shot up and immediately regretted it. Some little bastard was hammering away at my brain, and my mouth was a desert wasteland. It took me a moment to realize I was at Beck’s.
In his bedroom.
In his bed.
I lifted the covers, letting out a relieved breath when I saw I still had on my clothes. Pressing my fingers to my forehead, I swung my legs over the side of the bed and screeched when the floor moved under my feet. Beck was stretched out on the carpet, a pillow under his head. He squinted up at me as his hand wrapped around my ankle.
“Please tell me I didn’t puke on you,” I said.
“There were a few close calls, but you didn’t puke. I did have to carry you in here, though, and then you got super chatty. When I tried to go sleep on the couch, you asked me to never leave you alone again, so…”
I dropped my head in my hands, all too aware of the weird thoughts I’d had about Beck last night. “Did I say anything embarrassing?”
“No, mostly just random stuff, heavy on the cat and science references, as usual.”
I peeked through my fingers. “Did I end up making out with anyone at the party?”
“That jackass you were talking to started to pull you away from the crowd, but I cut him off. You gave him your number, but I don’t think he’ll be calling you after what I said to him. Sorry about that.” His tone conveyed that he wasn’t actually sorry at all.
Beck sat up, his hair more a mess than a stylized mess now, although he still made it look good. “You went to a party, did a keg stand, and got so drunk you forgot half the night. Congrats on this amazing milestone in your life.” He squeezed my leg. “What are you gonna do next?”
“Uh, Disneyland?” I spotted a pen on his side table, so I wound my hair into a bun and secured it in place. “Actually, I’m thinking breakfast. Is that thing about greasy food being a good hangover cure true?”
“There’s nothing bacon can’t fix.” Beck glanced at the clock. “I’ve got just enough time to hit the diner around the corner before I need to get going on the rest of my day. This huge assignment in econ is trying to kill me, and I want to knock it out before my game tonight.”
We’d only been practicing conversation skills last night, but he’d said I should go to a game, and the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to. “Would you be embarrassed if I came to watch you play?”
The beat of silence made my stomach clench—I was blurring the lines too much. Already I had him helping me with my list, carrying me home from parties, and I didn’t want to smother him.
But then a smile spread across his face. “Not at all. It’d be cool.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. But best lay off the booze for one night. I might be too distracted to keep the guys off you.”
“Pfft. Like that’s gonna be a problem.” I stepped over the piles of clothes littering the floor of his room and headed to the bathroom. My eyeliner had made a run for my cheeks, so I cleaned it up the best I could. Figured it was nice enough for the diner, at least.
All that really mattered was that, in the light of day, I was thinking clearly enough to realize that Beck was an awesome friend and nothing more. I’d never do anything to risk messing that up, either. I needed him in a way I didn’t need most people.
Momentary attraction aside, I’d say last night had been a success. I’d hit a huge party and had fun, even if the last half was a bit blurred—very college, if I do say so myself. With two items checked off the list, I was feeling pretty good about life. As for finding a cute boy to make out with, there was this total hottie who always studied at the same spot in the library. I’d wanted to approach him a dozen times, but hadn’t been able to work up the courage.
This afternoon, I was going to walk right up to him and put Beck’s flirting tips to good use.