Ali stood in front of the full-length mirror, silent as Cristina smoothed her veil and bustled her dress. She was grateful to her friend for having the balls to face down the other women, including Cecile Dawson, and tell them to leave. Her body was in the throes of fighting back a panic attack, and she wanted desperately to just get through the next few hours and disappear to St. Maarten where she could forget the mess she’d made of everything.

 

She took a few deep, steadying breaths and looked at her best friend in the reflection, just over her shoulder.

 

"I know what you're thinking," Christina said softly. "Stop it. This is not a mistake. This is what you've been planning for a whole year. You are going to go out there and walk down that aisle on your Daddy's arm, and you are going to be radiant."

 

Ali blinked back tears as she gazed at her reflection. She didn't feel radiant. Though not a hair was out of place and not a single wrinkle marred her gown, everything was far from perfect. She felt like her heart was being squeezed by a giant, cruel fist, and there weren’t enough pearls and lace and lipstick in the world to make that better.

 

She thought of Bobby beaming in his tux at the end of the aisle, waiting patiently for her to walk to him. She imagined the moment Reverend Allen would pronounce them man and wife, and the whole church would clap. She imagined Bobby giving her that first kiss to join their souls in matrimony.

 

Then she tried to envision their wedding night, but all she could see was Alejandro. It was his handsome face she saw bending to hers, his dark eyes gazing at her full of love and desire and promise. Instead of Bobby quietly murmuring, I love you, Sugar, she heard Alejandro's husky voice whispering in her ear, Mi amor, mi corazón, mi preciosa esposa as he turned her inside out with pleasure.

 

Ali doubled over with a cry, clutching her chest. Every fiber of her being longed for him. The ache was too much to bear. There was a roaring in her ears and she couldn't catch her breath.

 

"I think you need a Xanax," Cristina said gently. Ali shook her head but the roaring wouldn't stop. She leaned against the wall. I can't do this.

 

"Ali, I'm serious," she heard Cristina say through the haze. "I'm going to give you something to take the edge off. You're on the verge of a panic attack. We can't have you collapsing out there."

 

"I can't do this," Ali gasped. "It's not supposed to happen this way."

 

"This is exactly what I was afraid of. Shit," Cristina murmured under her breath, rummaging in her handbag for the bottle of pills. "Here." She pressed a small while pill in Ali's hand and held out a water bottle. "Take this and try to relax. In ten minutes you'll be fine, I promise."

 

Obediently Ali placed the pill on her tongue and washed it down with a mouthful of water. In a few minutes the shaking stopped, just as Cristina had said it would.

 

"Cristina, I don't know what I'm doing."

 

"You're marrying Bobby," her friend said.

 

"Am I making a mistake?"

 

"Of course not."

 

"Cristina." Looking deep into her best friend's eyes, she took Cristina's hands in hers and clung to them, tugging her close. "Please."

 

"I love you like a sister, mami," Cristina vowed, her eyes misting as she squeezed Ali's fingers. "Like my very own flesh and blood. And if you were my sister, I would tell you the same thing. I know you love him, Ali, I do. I know it's hurting right now. I remember what you went through before, how bad it was. So I'm telling you, as a friend, as a sister, this is the best thing for you to do. A life with Alejandro is a death sentence. You care about Bobby and he loves you enough to forgive you and spend the rest of his life taking care of you. What else could you possibly ask for?"

 

Ali shook her head and forced a smile. “No, you’re right. It’s the smart choice. I’m lucky, just like you said. I just need a second alone.”

 

Cristina smoothed her coral-colored gown. “Just a minute,” she warned before walking through the door. Ali could hear Cristina speaking rapidly to the others, her stern tone ensuring the bride one peaceful moment before showtime.

 

Ali closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. Thoughts of Alejandro pushed into her brain and she chased them out. It was like phantom pain, the way she felt his stubble scratching against her throat, the way she heard his deep voice murmuring in her ear. She even swore she could feel the vibration of the Harley’s rumble through the floorboards, and just the thought of never being on the back of his bike again sent her into a fresh wave of panic.

 

But there was no time for that. Cristina was back through the door, her bouquet in hand. She reached her other hand for Ali’s. “Come on, then, mi mejor amiga linda,” she said softly. “Let’s go give these people what they’ve been waiting for.”

 

The organs sounded and four hundred people stood from their seats, waiting for the future First Lady of Texas to make her way down the aisle.