Chapter Eight
The dinner party
Liv couldn’t believe she’d agreed to this. Her brother had arranged a dinner party of all things and he’d invited her and Mason as a package. They’d only been friend dating as she called it for three weeks and it felt weird to be classed as a couple especially when they had made no decision that they were. Mason had only grinned when she’d showed him the invitation. Liv hadn’t been sure it was a good idea; she didn’t want people making assumptions, even though she knew they already were, but Mason had brushed aside her worries telling her it would all be fine. Since the night they’d had dinner together they’d become close. She had no trouble telling him things she couldn’t admit to anyone else, and he sat silent without judgement as she poured her heart out to him about the guilt she felt. She hadn’t told him that half the guilt she felt was because of her feelings for him, but he wasn’t stupid, he knew she was struggling. He’d made it clear he wanted more than her friendship, but she’d felt no pressure from him, just his unwavering patience. He showed her in many ways how much he cared for her, he’d stroke her hair as they sat watching a film together; brushed her cheek as he said hello and the forehead kisses every time he dropped her off at her door were proof of his feelings. Those kisses melted her every time, but it was the warmth in his eyes that sent her into overdrive. The last three weeks she’d been torn between wanting him to kiss her and release the ache he caused inside her or running away from him and holding her memories of Ryan as a shield against him.
Now, here they were at Tony’s house, he’d invited a few friends from work and their wives. Ava was here too, she’d brought a man named Jack, who seemed very nice, if not a tad too possessive of her. Liv wasn’t sure if that would work in his favour. Mason squeezed Liv's knee under the table and she turned to give him her attention.
“Are you ok?” he asked quietly.
“Yeah, I was just thinking of Ava.”
Mason grinned. “I think she’s met her match there. I don’t think Jack will take any of her crap.”
Liv looked over at the man in question. He had his arm resting over the back of Ava’s chair. Every so often Ava would lean back and he would tussle her hair gently making her smile. They’d known each other for over a year, but Ava had always run from him saying he was too intense. Liv thought Mason was right; Jack didn’t seem like the kind of man Ava could walk all over and that was a good thing. Ava needed a strong man and Jack definitely seemed to be the dominant type. He’d be good for her.
“I’m going to speak to Tony a minute. Can I bring you back a drink?”
She grinned. “I’m ok thank you. One’s my limit, remember?”
“Shame, I really want to meet table dancing Olivia.” He chuckled.
“I’m sure she’ll make an appearance one day.” She promised.
“I can’t wait.” His hand brushed her cheek. “I’ll be back in a minute.”
“Ok. I’ll still be here.” She said with a grin. She watched him walk towards the kitchen, her eyes glued to him. He looked gorgeous in his navy blue suit; his trousers cupped his bottom and his thighs giving Liv a view of his beautiful physique.
“So,” the wife of one Tony’s friends drawled. “Tony tells me that you and Mason are dating.” Liv turned to face her with a frown; she knew Tony wouldn’t have said that. “We’re just friends, actually.” Liv replied politely.
“Sure, sure. I guess with your husband dying only two years ago you’d want to keep your hook up a secret.” She said in a bitchy tone.
Liv flinched in shock at the attack. Why would a woman she didn’t know want to hurt her like she just had? She didn’t know what to say, so she walked away instead. She picked up her clutch from the table and went in the direction of the bathroom; after she entered, she locked the door behind her. Liv stared at her reflection in the mirror, her eyes burned from unshed tears. Should she feel badly about moving forward with Mason? They may not have slept together or even declared themselves a couple, but the truth stared her in the face every time she looked at Mason. They were a couple. Friends didn’t cuddle up to watch a film and fall asleep together on the sofa wrapped up in each other’s arms. The tears slipped down her cheeks. When had she fallen in love with him? She shook her head, she knew the answer to that, he was sweet, he was gorgeous, and he was so generous. He always made sure she was comfortable, he always put her first. For such a strong man, he was so gentle. He could crush her with one arm, but he treated her like a fragile flower. She’d never felt so delicate and she loved it. She loved his strength. Then the realisation came to her - he loved her too. Liv leaned her head against the cold mirror. Crap. She could see their future, see the wedding they would have and the babies they would make and she felt hope for the first time in forever. She would always love Ryan, but Mason was a part of her now. She hadn’t thought she would ever get to this point in her life, she never thought she’d be able to give up the life she had planned with Ryan, but with Mason, it seemed natural.
A knock at the door made her jump. “Olivia, are you in there?” it was Mason.
“Yes, I’ll be out in a sec.” she quickly tidied up her face and opened the door.
“Ava said you rushed off?”
“The big breasted blonde said something to upset me.”
Mason turned to go and Liv grabbed his arm in alarm. “Where are you going?”
“To speak to Candy.”
She laughed at the name that matched the mean girl attitude so well, even as warmth spread through her at the protectiveness he was showing her. “You don’t need to do that. She actually cleared something up for me.”
He frowned. “She did? Are you feeling ok?”
She slipped her hand into his. “I’m more than ok.”
“Good. She’s just jealous sweetness. She’s trying to better herself by having her boobs done, dying her hair and more, but none of that can make you a better person. You look the way you do and you’re still sweet and lovely.”
“I’m glad you didn’t say nice.” He said smiling.
“You are nice.”
She rolled her eyes. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome, now let’s get back before Candy thinks she’s upset you.”
“Do I look like I’ve been crying?” she asked.
“No.” he slowly raised his hands to her face cupping her cheeks. Staring into his eyes, Liv stopped breathing, as his face got closer to her own she closed her eyes and then he kissed her. It was magical, it was breath taking, it was right. He kissed her slow and soft. His fingers rested below her ears, one of his thumbs caressed her cheek, and she lost herself in him. When he pulled away to catch her eyes she saw worry there, perhaps he thought he’d pushed her too fast. He was wrong. He hadn’t.
“Now, I look loved?” She asked him with a smile, her heart hammering in her chest.
Mason stared at her intently. “Yes, now you look loved.”
She beamed. Mason let go of her face and tangled his fingers with hers.
“Sometimes things happen to help you see what you’re missing.” Liv said quietly, looking into his dark eyes.
“What you’re running away from.” he corrected.
“No more running for me.” Liv told him sincerely, hoping he would understand what she was trying to tell him.
He did. “If you run from me, Olivia, I will catch you.”
“I would hope so.”
“I understand that things are going to take time I just ask that you don’t shut me out.”
“I’ll try not to. I’ve been pushing everyone away for so long that it’s become so easy to do.” She admitted.
“Since our first date you haven’t done that to me. That tells me things maybe you’re not ready to admit to yet.”
“You’re not an easy person to ignore.” She bit her lip before continuing. “Since the first time I laid eyes on you I knew you would become special to me.”
“You didn’t want me to be.”
“No, and you know why.”
“I do, but things have changed now.”
“You’ve worn down my defences, you mean.”
“That was the plan. If you knew how hard it’s been to drop you home every night and not kiss you…”
“It’s been hard for me as well. If I’m honest though, I’m glad you didn’t do it.”
“Why?”
“For the record, our first kiss was perfect, but if you’d tried before now I would have run from you.”
“I had a feeling you would, that’s why I held back.” He said seriously, and then his face broke out in a grin. “Does this mean we’re dating now?”
“I think we always have been.”
“I know, but now we’ve put it into words it's real. How do you feel?”
Liv thought for a moment. “Happy. How about you?”
“I’m delighted, baby. I won’t ever pressure you, Olivia. You’ve had enough of that in your life lately.”
“I trust you, Mason. You are so sweet. Have I told you that?”
“A few times in the last couple of weeks.” He grinned.
Her eyes twinkled. “I think you should put a little pressure on me otherwise we might never move forward.”
His turned serious, his gaze capturing hers. “Are you ready for that?”
“Yes.”
Mason leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Prepare to be kissed a lot then”
“I look forward to it.”
“There you are, jeez, that blond bitch has been telling everyone that you’ve sneaked away to have some nookie.” Ava said from behind them making them both jump in surprise.
Mason grinned. “We aren’t there yet.” He whispered in Liv’s ear. “What did you tell her?” he asked Ava, knowing that she wouldn’t have held back.
“I told her she was a bitch.”
Liv laughed. “Let her say what she likes, we know the truth.”
“Yes, I’d say Mason finally kissed you.”
Liv raised her hand to her lips in surprise. “How could you possibly know that?”
“Mason is wearing your lipstick.”
With a chuckle, Mason rubbed the back of his hand across his mouth and sure enough, there was a pink stain.
“So, how was he?”
“Ava, I’m not answering that.” Liv laughed.
“So, you’ll tell me later when he’s not with you?”
“She’ll tell you everything. Doesn’t she always?” Mason said with a grin.
“She’d never give up asking if I didn’t.” Liv laughed.
“I’m just curious, that’s all.” Ava said.
Liv coughed. “Nosy more like.”
“Whatever.” Ava grinned.
Mason, still holding her hand tugged Liv along the hallway towards the dining room. “Let’s go and show our faces. Give them something to talk about.”
“Wow, dude, you like to stir the pot.”
“No, I just think if they are nosy enough to make stuff up we should at least give them a show, besides, it stops them talking about somebody else. If Olivia was upset though, it would be a completely story.”
“I wouldn’t want to be them if Liv was upset.” Ava said seriously.
Liv snorted. “He’s a big softy.”
Ava shook her head, “To you, maybe.”
“Olivia, are you all right?” Tony asked as they entered the dining room and walked towards him.
“I’m fine, where’s your friend?”
“I asked her to leave when I heard what she was saying.”
“Oh, that’s sweet.”
Tony grinned. “She didn’t think so.”
“I bet. You’re a bit scary when you’re mad.”
“She’s lucky Maggie didn’t hear what she was saying.”
Liv looked around, but didn’t see Maggie. “Where is she?”
“Picking Joshua up from her mum’s house.”
“Oh good, I can have a snuggle before we leave. Jack has an early start.” Ava said.
“And he’s making you leave with him?” Liv asked in surprise.
Ava actually blushed. “No, I’m making him. He has an important meeting in the morning and I don’t want him to be tired.”
That was when Liv realised just how special Ava thought Jack was. She beamed at Ava, but didn’t say a word; she didn’t want to embarrass her. A hand slipped around Liv's waist and she leaned into Mason’s warmth. “Do you want a drink?”
“No, I’m good, thank you.”
“Ok, I’ll go grab one. I’ll be back in a minute. Will you be ok?”
“I’ll be fine.” Liv promised.
“I’ll keep an eye on her.” Ava said with a twinkle in her eyes.
Mason shook his head at her. “I won’t be long, sweetness.”
Liv watched him walk away with her heart fluttering. She couldn’t wait until he took her home so he could kiss her again. She had no worries about it going further, she knew when he’d agreed to give her a little push he hadn’t meant sex.
Ava whistled. “Wow. The look you’re giving him is scorching.”
Liv blushed as her brother covered his face with his hands. “I do not want to hear any girl talk about Mason.” He groaned.
“Go away then because it’s happening.” Ava ordered, and he didn’t need telling twice.
Liv laughed. “I’ve never seen him move so fast.”
Ava didn’t laugh with her. Instead, she took Liv by the hand and led her to a chair. Checking no one was in earshot she turned back to face her. “How do you feel?”
“Mason just asked me that. I feel happy, but I’m scared.”
“That he’ll hurt you?”
“No, that I will hurt him. I’m letting go of the past, but what if he can’t do the same? Will he keep being reminded that Ryan was my first love?”
“He’s accepted that you won’t forget about Ryan, Liv, he doesn’t want you to.”
“Down the line he may resent me, resent Ryan. What if we have kids?”
“He will love them like he loves you.”
Liv shook her head. “You think I’m being silly, don’t you?”
“I think you are finally letting go and you’re scared. You won’t forget Ryan, and Mason isn’t going to replace him. He is your new start. He knows your hang ups, he knows everything about you, and he loves you anyway.”
“I love him too. My love for him is different from my love for Ryan, but it’s still strong. I can’t see myself being without him. I want to spend my life with him, have a family with him.”
“Then tell him. He needs to hear the words.”
“You’re right.”
“I know. We don’t have drinks so we’ll have to high five on it. Here’s to moving forward.” Ava said as she lifted her hand.
Liv giggled and smacked Ava’s hand with her own, “To moving forward.”
“I’m so pleased for you. You deserve to be happy again.”
“I am. I also feel guilty, afraid, worried. You name it, I feel it.”
“I think it’s natural to feel that way.”
“I know it is. All the books say so, but I wonder when it will stop. I want to remember Ryan and feel happiness that I had him as part of my life, not feel the loss that I carry around with me.”
“Only time will heal, Liv. Mason seems ok with it; most guys would hate not being the centre of your universe.”
“He’s very understanding. But you’re wrong; Mason is the centre of my universe.” She hesitated. “What if I’m not ever ready to take the next step with him?”
“You will be.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“The chemistry between you is off the charts. You’re made for each other.”
“I was made for Ryan.”
“When you’re lucky enough to get another chance at love, you have to embrace it.”
“The lady at the pier said the same thing.”
“It must be right then.”
“We haven’t admitted anything to each other yet.”
“You will when the time is right.”
“His kiss was timed right. It was amazing. I have never been so lost in a kiss before.” Guilt filled her as she said the words. Her kisses with Ryan had been explosive, but in a different way. She had to stop comparing because Ryan and Mason were two very different men, but each of them had her heart. Comparing them would hurt Mason and hurt her memories of Ryan.
“With Ryan you had a safe, lasting relationship. You both loved each other and you would have grown old together if he hadn’t got sick.”
“That’s what makes me feel worse.”
“Why?”
“Knowing I wouldn’t have met Mason guts me.”
“He’s a part of you now as Ryan is.”
“Yeah, a huge part of me.”
Ava looked behind Liv and grinned. “He’s back. No more girl talk.” She laughed.
“Is everything all right?” Mason asked as he slipped an arm around Liv’s shoulders.
“Yes, everything is perfect.” Liv smiled sweetly.
“Tony said Maggie will be here any minute. We can have a cuddle and then I’ll take you home.”
“Ok.” Liv blushed because going home with him meant more kissing and she wanted that so much. She thought he knew because he caressed her burning cheek and gave her a dimple smile.
They heard the front door open and Ava clapped her hands. “Yay, baby time. Josh is so loveable I could just eat him up.”
“I’d rather you didn’t eat my son.” Maggie laughed as she walked towards them. “But I know what you mean.” She passed the baby straight to Ava and as Jack walked up behind her, Liv could picture them as a family, and it filled her with delight. She didn’t think Ava had to worry about growing old alone anymore. Liv looked at Mason and caught his heated stare; Liv didn’t think she had anything to worry about either.