I could not stand the sight of myself during the initial days of the cycle. When the statue drained me, it reduced me to nothing. It was the closest to a true death that I could feel. I always came back as a creature with no certain form or shape. Until I fed on blood, I was nothing more than a grotesque creature made from flesh and with nothing but a long bony tube with which to feed.
I could barely move. I usually spent my first nights in this broken and simple form beside the statue that had cursed me with this eternal existence. Soon, Richard would arrive with another wife to call my own. He was instructed never to enter the vault while I was in this form. Similarly, my new wife was to be blindfolded with her hands tied behind her back.
The hunger for blood struck at me with a vengeful pain that emanated from my very soul. I had no form, no nerves, or body to harm. No, this was beyond a physical hunger, it was a spiritual and supernatural one. The door to the vault swung open, and though I could not hear it, I could feel the presence of a healthy young woman. I acted out of instinct. I was not gentle, but I was precise. The crude feeding tube that emerged from my shapeless form shot into the skin at the base of her neck.
Blood flowed freely into me, and I felt myself coming back from the brink. Death, once again, was forced to watch as I drank the life of another and took my first uncertain steps back into my miserable and cursed life. She was terrified, I could taste it with every drop I took from her. That was normal, they were always scared at first.
I pulled the tube back and retreated into the shadows behind the statue. Learning restraint was perhaps the most difficult part of my existence. When I tasted blood, all I wished was to drink until there was none left. It was a lust that couldn’t be satiated, but there were limits. I only took what I needed, and no more.
Richard entered the room, I felt his presence next. He guided my new wife out. She was alive thanks to my restraint. As instructed, he left the door open so I could emerge when the time was right. We had done this countless time since he was first taken into my employment. One of my wives had been his mother. Before she died, she begged me to take care of her son. She was one of the few I truly loved, so I obliged.
Richard spent his entire life working for me in one capacity or another. He was the only person I trusted in this world. As the blood of this new wife surged through me, I was given form. Arms and legs grew from my uncertain shape. A body with bones, a head, eyes, a mouth, and a nose also took shape.
I still lacked true skin to cover my newly formed body. I walked awkwardly on brand new legs like a toddler to the entrance of the vault. Hanging on a hook beside the entrance was a long red robe with a hood that I wore at this stage in the cycle. Richard knew to have it washed and waiting for me after my first feeding. I draped the robe over me and pulled the hood over my head. Richard was waiting for me outside the entrance to the vault.
I saw my new wife for the first time as the vault door slowly closed behind me. She was sprawled out on top of the sheets. She wore a silk nightgown that fit her perfectly. Her jet black hair was spread out behind her on the pillow. Her snowy white skin matched the shade of moonlight pouring in through the nearby window.
Looking upon her, my hollow and cold heart felt something for the first time in hundreds of years. She looked just like her. I could barely remember her face after all this time, but before these mail-order wives I once had a true love. One that I left behind to fight in someone else’s war. This woman laying before me was a spitting image of her. Her beauty cut through the immortal curse that separated me from her all this time.
“She’s perfect, Richard, utterly perfect,” I whispered.
“I’m glad you agree, sir. She looked exactly how you described your true wife. I thought, after the last one, you needed someone you could talk to, perhaps even love.”
I shook my head. “I’m incapable of love, Richard.”
“With all due respect, sir, one does not require a beating heart to feel love.”
I felt a tear welling up behind my freshly formed eyes. I turned away from her and looked to the open door.
“You’re a good friend, Richard. What is her name?” I asked.
“It’s Natalia, sir.”
“Have a meal prepared for her. I will need to feed again soon and she needs her strength.”
“Right away, sir.”
“Oh, and Richard?”
He turned and looked at me and I at him.
“While I appreciate what you did, we will not speak of her again. Are we clear?”
Richard nodded. “Yes, sir, I understand.”
I made my way to the banquet hall and sat at the end of the long, intricately crafted table. This place was the definition of luxury, of success and wealth, and yet I could enjoy none of it. I only used it as a place to my make my wives feel comfortable and safe. It was nothing more than an illusion.
Richard’s gesture stirred up old emotions and memories that I had long thought forgotten. Seeing my new wife, Natalia, reminded me of her. Her name was Reyna, and she looked just like her. My mind wandered back, hundreds of years, to the last night I saw my true wife, the night before our expedition into the forbidden tombs.
I was a prized soldier back then. I fought and died beside warriors for a place that no longer exists. It cannot be found in history books, our enemies made certain of that when they crushed us beneath their heel. We knew we were losing, but our military leaders insisted that we push forward and die with honor if we must.
Reyna didn’t want me to go. She begged me to stay. I recalled the night we sat in our bedroom, surrounded by luxuries which only that time could afford. We argued by candlelight as electricity was a far-flung fantasy from that time period.
“It is madness! The king has gone mad, can’t you see that, Constantin?”
“Mad or no, Reyna, he is my king and I must follow him!”
Reyna threw her hands up and stepped back into the darkness. The candlelight briefly illuminated the silk dress she wore. Made from the finest of materials our dwindling empire could offer. We had both returned that night from a somber celebration of tomorrow’s final push into the enemy’s land. Reyna looked indescribably beautiful. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on. I would say that again even now hundreds of years into the future, even after countless wives that came and went, she was perfection.
“Where must you follow him, Constantin? Into death? Because that is where he marches his armies when the sun rises!”
I crossed the gap between us and took her hands into mine. She wouldn’t look directly at me, but I saw the candlelight flickering in her endless blue eyes.
“I will come back to you, my love. I always do.”
Reyna pulled back and wiped tears from her eyes. “I can’t believe you, Constantin, not this time.”
I wrapped my arm around her back and pulled her into me. We locked eyes and I gazed deeply into hers.
“Very well, then believe this: I love you, and no matter how far apart the winds of time may carry us, I will always find my way back to you,” I whispered.
The tears welled up in her eyes as her soft hands grazed my face.
“I love you too. Please, don’t go.”
“Very well, tomorrow when the king’s army marches to the east, we shall go to the west, together.”
“Truly?” she asked.
“I swear it.”
She smiled through the tears and pressed her lips to mine. Even after hundreds of years, I could still feel her passionate kiss against my lips. I felt the heat that emanated from the fires of our love. Her hands desperately tried to undo her clothing. I reached down and gripped the frilled centerpiece of her dress.
“Here, like this,” I said, as I tore open the front of her dress. One of her soft white breasts spilled out from within. I cupped it with one hand as I furiously tore off the rest of her dress. She laughed and grinned. Her hands gripped the waistband of my leggings and wrenched them downward. My thin shirt tore like parchment when faced with her passion. We were both naked within seconds. Our tongues danced as our lips never left each other’s embrace. I lifted her up and sat her upon the intricately crafted dresser where we stored our clothing. As her hands slid down my back, I softly kissed her neck, tracing a line down to her thick and curvaceous breasts.
I lifted one with my hand and it slid it into my mouth. I gently suckled on her as my hand slid up her thigh. My fingers slid into her with ease as she begged me to take her. I pushed her legs apart and stepped forward. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I gripped her waist as I thrusted forward into her.
She cried out in ecstasy and bit into the flesh on my shoulder playfully. I roared like a beast and thrusted into her again and again. With each thrust I heard the sounds of pleasure erupted from her. I picked her up and took her to the bed. As I laid her down I hovered over her, taking in the depths of her beauty as she laid there with her breasts falling to the side and her legs tucked together.
There was nothing so beautiful in this world, of that I was certain. I leaned down and kissed her as I spread her legs apart and gently slid inside. We made slow, deep, and passionate love. With a steady rhythm I pulled out and then slowly slid back inside of her. I wanted her to feel every part of me and the way I felt her. We stared deeply into each other’s eyes as she climaxed. Her head shot back, her back arched, and her entire body quaked as she screamed to the stars.
She wrapped her hands around the back of my head and pulled me down. I returned to a thundering rhythm. The entire bed shook with each thrust as I felt myself reaching a climax. One final thrust into her and a wave of pleasure crashed over my entire body. It was a feeling that I still desperately clung to after hundreds of years, but one that faded with time.
Our story did not have a happy ending. Our plans to leave before the final push were foiled before we could exit the borders of the city. As punishment for abandoning my post, I was forced to march at the front lines, along with the rest of the prisoners and fodder for the enemy. When it came to desecrate the enemy’s holy ground by entering the forbidden tombs, I was first to cross that line and attract the ire of their gods.
Had we simply made it out of the city, none of this would have happened. I would have spent my life with Reyna as I always intended. We would have been happy. We would have grown old together and I would have long been gone from this world. Fate, it seemed, did not have a happy ending in store for me. My story was one without end, only endless torture.
Natalia and Richard entered the hall. I retreated further into my hood so she wouldn’t seem me. She moved with a purpose, as if each step meant something to her. She approached the table without fear and sat in one of the ornate chairs beside me.
“I know what you are,” she said.
“Do you?” I asked.
“Yes, Richard told me on our way here.”
I leaned back into my chair, pulling myself deeper into the robe to hide from her gaze.
“Then you must think I am a monster. Are you afraid of me?” I asked.
Natalia shook her head. “No, I don’t think you’re a monster, and I’m not afraid of you. The men you rescued me from, those are monsters. You, you’re unique.”
I scoffed. “Unique? I am cursed with an eternal burden. Do you know how many have come before you? I must feed until you have nothing left, and then I will move on to the next one.”
Why was I being so crass? Normally I did everything in my power to make them feel comfortable and welcome. Was it because she reminded me of Rayna? Was it because my memory of her filled me with rage at the curse that has corrupted my soul? I could see Richard’s disapproving gaze.
“I am sorry. It’s just, you remind me of someone that I once knew. I haven’t seen her in hundreds of years,” I said.
“Was she your wife? I mean, your real wife?” Natalia asked.
“Yes, she was.”
“What was she like?”
My eyes shot up and I looked at her through the darkness of the hood. She had Rayna’s eyes. Calm, calculated, but also caring and soothing. Could this be her? Did her immortal soul, if such a thing did exist, find its way through the winds of time to be with me once more?
“She looked identical to you. She was calm and collected. When she wanted something, she took it, no matter the cost. I tried to flee with her, tried to escape this fate, but it found me nonetheless. I, I—”
I ducked my head down to stifle a sob. I waved to Richard who departed with haste to fetch Natalia’s food. She found her way into my past faster and more efficiently than any who came before her.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Natalia said.
“It’s fine. You should eat, I will need to feed again soon.”
Natalia nodded as her eyes wandered around the hall.
“Can I ask you something personal?” Natalia said.
“Have you not done so already? Speak.”
“Do you, you know, sleep with your wives?” she asked.
I looked back up to her and for a moment I felt Rayna’s hands on my face once again. I longer for her touch. Rayna, Natalia, they were one and the same in that moment.
“Only if they wish to, and only when my body is fully formed.”
“Is that why you’re hiding your face and your body? Richard told me it had something to do with a cycle.”
He never tells them this much. Was he trying to soften the blow? Was it for my sake, so I wouldn’t have to watch her suffer in confusion, or was it for hers?
Richard emerged once again with a plate of food. He set the piping hot dish down in front of her.
“Wine?” he asked.
I grunted and Richard turned to look at me.
“No wine tonight Richard.”
“What if I want some?” Natalia asked.
“Out of the question. It taints the blood.”
Natalia smiled playfully. “Taints it? Or makes it better?”
She was smart. If she drank too much wine, her blood would have an equal effect on me. My mind would become dulled. In that state I wouldn’t be able to control my thirst. I could drain her completely and not even realize it.
“One glass, but that’s it,” I said.
Richard poured a glass of red wine for Natalia and she began eating. While she nourished her body, I allowed myself a moment to admire her. She had a perfect physique. Her jet black hair fell across her shoulders, which descended to thick breasts that filled out the shape of her gown. She was exactly as I remembered Rayna. The resemblance was uncanny to say the least.
“When you’re finished eating, I’ll take you to your room and feed,” I said.
“Will you stay with me tonight? I mean, if your skin grows back.”
“Why do you wish to lay with me?”
“You make me feel something I’ve never felt before,” she said.
Could it be something as cliché as love? No, we barely knew one another. Even if she did look like Rayna, it couldn’t be that. Not yet.
“What is it? What do I make you feel?”
Natalia’s cheeks blushed as she set down her fork. She looked over at me with piercing blue eyes.
“You make me feel safe, Constantin. No one has ever been able to do that since I was a child.”
She knew my name? Richard must have told her that as well.
“How could you feel safe with me? I drink your blood.”
“I know, but somehow I know you won’t hurt me. Honestly, it’s kind of a rush. So, what do you say? Will you stay?”
“Only until dawn, then I must leave.”