Chapter Ten
Dangling her feet into the water off the edge of the dock, Alisha watched the sun set on the lake. The peace of the location was broken by laughter from a group of people gathered around a fire pit two houses down. Voices rang out from the other direction as someone playfully threw someone else in the water. It was impossible to begrudge families for having fun simply because she wasn’t. In a way, their happiness comforted her. Someday, someday I’ll feel like that again.
Just not today.
Rachelle hadn’t called her back. Not even a text. Alisha was tempted to call her and apologize again, but Rachelle had asked for time.
Spencer hadn’t called, but Alisha hadn’t expected him to. He was dealing with his own issues.
Does he blame me, too?
Does it matter?
Nothing will ever be the same.
She lay back on the dock and watched the stars as they began to appear in the sky. I should go somewhere. Somewhere far away.
Is that running away?
What’s the alternative? Stay here and feel sorry for myself?
There’s an upside to having no one in my life. I don’t have to ask anyone for permission to do whatever the hell I want to do.
She sat up, took her phone out of her pocket, and began to search for last-minute vacation destinations. She wanted to go somewhere easy. No planning. No thinking. Just take me away.
A cruise?
She searched for ships that left from somewhere on the East Coast within driving distance. A seven-night cruise to Grand Turk and the Bahamas? She clicked through an itinerary and its accompanying photos. The reviews were positive. “Walk off the boat onto the beach. Escape to paradise.”
That sounds pretty damn good right about now.
She clicked through the website.
“Number of passengers?” Alisha blinked back tears and entered, “1.”
“Inside. Balcony. Suite.” She read about each and chose the middle option. A few more thousand dollars just to have a butler? Balcony is fine.
The constant state of uncertainty and fear in her childhood made Alisha avoid anything resembling irresponsibility. She’d worked hard to put herself through school. She’d saved diligently and bought her own home a few years ago. Although she was far from rich, she had a decent rainy-day savings account. She also had a current passport.
I’m doing this.
She chose the earliest available cruise, filled out her personal and credit card information, and then hesitated.
What do I have to lose?
I don’t have anything left here.
She confirmed the purchase and tucked her phone back into her pocket.
Paradise, here I come.
Brett pulled into the small driveway of Alisha’s lake house and parked behind her car. He’d guessed she would be there, and seeing her validated what his gut was telling him. They might not have had much time together, but he knew her. Their connection was real.
He saw her outline on the dock, illuminated by lights from the neighboring house, and walked down to where she was. Before stepping onto the dock, he slipped off his Louis Vuitton loafers and socks and rolled his pants up. She was deep in thought and didn’t realize he was there until he sat down on her left side.
She bounced a foot into the air and screamed before realizing it was him, then she punched him in the arm—hard. “Stop sneaking up on me.”
He laughed and rubbed his arm. “Ouch.”
She settled back down beside him. “Seriously, don’t do that again. I aged about five years.”
He frowned. “You shouldn’t be out here alone. I could have been anyone.”
She turned to look back over the water. “I can take care of myself.”
The way she said it made him realize how often she probably had, and it saddened him. “You shouldn’t have to.”
She folded her arms in front of herself. “When has life ever been about what should be?”
He wanted to put an arm around her, to comfort her, but he knew she wasn’t ready. “Most of my family would agree with you today.”
She sighed and her voice softened. “Sorry. I know it wasn’t an easy day for any of you.”
“Or you.”
“Or me,” she agreed.
“There was no way you could have known.”
She laughed sadly and covered her face with one hand. “You don’t have to sugarcoat it for me. I should have stayed out of it.”
That wasn’t how he saw it, but what mattered was that she did. “Maybe, but you went to see my grandmother because you care about my family.” He took her left hand in his and ran his thumb over her now-bare ring finger. “I’ve never known anyone like you.”
Her hand went cold and stiff beneath his touch. “Brett, just because I’m not marrying your brother doesn’t mean . . .” Her voice trailed off, then she said, “The only way I could possibly screw this situation up more is if I sleep with you.”
He couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face. “I’m flattered that your mind went there, but we could start with dinner.” She went to pull her hand away, but he held on to it, brought it to his lips, and kissed her knuckles. “Before you throw me in the lake, this is a new suit.”
She laughed and their fingers laced. “I’m serious.”
“So am I.”
Her smile faded. “I can’t, Brett.”
“But you want to.”
She gave him a look so full of yearning he almost kissed her, but then she said, “All I want right now is to get as far away from here as I can.”
“Where would you go?” Wherever it was, he’d take her there.
“Oh, I’m going. I already bought my ticket. I leave on Sunday for a week.”
His hand tightened on hers. “Where?”
“On a cruise.”
“Alone?”
She pressed her lips and slid her hand away from his. “Yes, alone. I want to sit on a beach, sip frozen drinks, get a tan, and forget about everything else.”
“I have a two-hundred-fifty-foot yacht.”
“Good for you.”
She wasn’t making it easy for him, and that was a novel experience. Too many women offered themselves to him before he had a chance to learn their names. Alisha was going to make him work to be with her, and he liked it. “There’s no need to suffer through being shuttled like cattle when you could go there on a private craft with a crew dedicated to anticipating your every need.”
“Quick, say something plebeian, your entitlement is showing.”
He thought about what he’d said and grunted. Like his father and grandmother, he’d been raised with money. He generally didn’t think much about it, but lately he was aware of how it had shaped him. Seeing himself through Alisha’s eyes was often uncomfortable, but in an honest way that left him feeling invigorated. “The cattle reference was too much?”
With her finger and thumb she measured an inch. “Just a little.”
He was tempted to smile, but held it back. She was serious and adorable all at once. “Where does this perfectly wonderful cruise go?”
“Now you’re being sarcastic.”
He felt like a young man trying desperately to impress his first crush. “But in a humble, everyman kind of way.”
Her answering smile was reluctant, but it was there. “Fine.” She took out her phone and opened a photo of one of the cruise’s excursions. “Grand Turk. Look at that beach. Doesn’t it look amazing?”
All he saw was a herd of drunk college students, a hundred screaming children, and their sweaty parents all crammed onto a very crowded beach, but he wasn’t about to say it. “Hmm . . .”
She pointed to a lounge chair beneath an umbrella. “That’s where I’m going to be. Right there. Hopefully with a nice buzz.”
It would take a few drinks to make the setting appealing to Brett, but if she wanted to be on that beach, he wanted to be beside her. “And you already bought your ticket?”
She put her phone away. “I did. I never do anything wild or crazy, but I’m doing this. I leave this Sunday. I can’t wait.”
Sunday to Sunday.
I’d have to clear my schedule at work.
And find out what cabin she’s in. I’m sure the people in the next room would love to spend a week on my yacht instead.
Okay, then.
“Are you staying here or heading home?” he asked.
A kind of hopeful expression filled her eyes. “Going home.”
“I’ll follow you to make sure you get there safely.” He stood and offered her his hand. She took it and came to her feet close enough that with a dip of his head he could have claimed her lips with his. Their eyes met and held. He wanted her, but strangely he didn’t want to rush it. He wanted to savor every moment with her before he tasted every inch of her. Being with her felt that good.
“Thank you.” Those two softly spoken, heartfelt words warmed him in a way that he welcomed even as they scared him a little, too.
Whatever they had, however this thing between them worked out, he knew he would never be the same. And that is not a bad thing.