I was fucking over my bandmates and I knew it but there was no way I could play tonight.

If the venue came after them for lost ticket sales, I'd pay them. I shell out whatever I needed and then I'd quit. They were poised to be a huge fucking success and they didn't need my bullshit weighing them down. Ironic that I'd changed our name from what it was at first because it was pretty clear I'd gone and wrecked everything.

Alone in my white kitchen was a pretty fucking sad place to be pounding the Scotch, but I couldn't be around people right now.

There was only one person I wanted to be with but she was too wrapped up in her own neuroses to see that.

"Bloody hell," I growled as I poured another draught. I slammed it back and then shoved the glass aside, ready to dispense with the formality and just drink straight from the bottle, when the alarm at my building entrance went off.

Blinking, I flicked on the security camera to see CeCe, standing there, arms hugging her chest tightly. For a moment my heart soared until reality dragged me down again. Celia was a classy girl. She would want the closure that came from a face to face meeting. She would be looking to end this thing professionally, like two business people drawing up a contract, with no messy leftover feelings to deal with. And as much as I hated the idea, I knew I loved her too much to do anything other than give her what she wanted.

"Fuck," I sighed and entered the code to let her up. Then I took a drink straight from the bottle.

The elevator dinged open and there she was, still so fucking pretty she took my breath away. "You're here," she said as she stepped into the kitchen.

I lifted the half empty bottle. "Been here a bit, yeah," I said tightly.

"You're supposed to be playing a show right now."

"Yeah well..." I shrugged, unable to keep the bitterness out of my voice. "I suppose if my label wants to fire me for not fulfilling my contractual obligations, I'd understand. Given that this is a business relationship and all."

She coughed and looked away from me. I hated how far away from me she was right now, but I also couldn't stand to have her any closer. "Ewan," she started to say.

"No, I get it," I said, gripping the bottle. "You tried to warn me from the very beginning. I told you I'd protect you from yourself but I see," my vision blurred and I looked away, choking. "I see I couldn't make you trust me enough for that to be enough."

"Ewan I trust you!" she cried, stepping to me. "And I know you mean what you say." She dropped her eyes. "And you said that you loved me."

"Aye," I said sadly. "I did. I do."

"Ewan, you told me it didn't matter whoever I was, or whoever I wanted to be, you loved me either way."

"I get it, lass." Now she was just pouring salt in the wound.

She stepped closer and I closed my eyes as her fingers brushed my face and I wished like hell I could pull away but I couldn't. "I know who I am," she said.

I opened my eyes to see her smiling. "I'm the woman that loves you."

I blinked and a warm sensation flooded my chest. I leaped to my feet and gripped her by the arms. "Are you serious?"

Her laugh was like a spring thaw after a long, dark winter. "Of course I'm serious! I love you and I don't care if they take our picture or write stupid headlines with silly words like canoodling." I had no idea what she was talking about, I was too wrapped up in the happiness that was flooding through me. "I'm Celia fucking Silver and I have music in my blood and I have Ewan fucking Boyd in my heart."

I lunged to kiss her, catching the corner of her grinning mouth before I pressed her face in between my hands and kissed her correctly.

"Ewan," she murmured against my mouth.

"Quiet, lass. You promised me next time we'd take it slow."

She laughed and gently pressed down on my arms. "Ewan you have a show to play."

"Fuck the show," I growled, trying to steer her to the bedroom.

"Ewan." She stepped back and leveled me with a glance. "You promised you'd protect me from myself. Well, I'm going to do the same for you. I won't let you sabotage this, do you hear me? You're too fucking talented to mess this up. You're playing tonight." She rushed in and kissed me again.

I took a deep breath. "Damn, lass."

She reached up and touched my face. "You go play your show," she told me. "Tear the roof off the fucker and make them all love you like I do." She bit her lip and I had to suppress a groan. "You do that and then come right back here and I'll be waiting."

My heart squeezed tight in my chest. "You'll stay?"

"Yes, lad." She nodded and pressed her lips to mine. "I'm staying."