“Hey, shh, it’s okay.” A slight shudder he couldn’t halt, worked through her body as he withdrew. Working quickly, he shed the condom and disposed of it. He wrapped her up in his arms, rocking her gently. “I’ve got you. I’m right here, Nat.”

She jammed her fists in her eyes and tried to forcefully rid herself of the tears. Aaron had been expecting this. She apparently had not. “Why am I crying? That was amazing.”

Trying to conceal his grin, he brushed a kiss on her head. “It was incredible.”

“I’m not crying because I’m sad. I am not sad,” she finally determined.

“Did I do anything you didn’t like, baby?”

“No. It’s just… I don’t know. I don’t have anything to compare it to.”

“I’m sure this makes me a possessive asshole but I happen to love that fact.”

She managed a half grin before she buried her face in his chest again. Leaning with her in his lap, he turned off the lamp, shrouding them in a cocoon of darkness. The sun would be up soon. He needed to get her to sleep if she could.

When she lifted her head and stared him down he knew neither of them was going to be sleeping anytime soon. “But you do. You slept with other people, people you didn’t really care about, right?”

Every intelligence officer reached the points of no return in negotiations. The place where no amount of lying was going to achieve the goal. The place where you either walked away or told the truth. The moonlight danced in her tear-soaked hazel eyes as she studied him, seeing beyond what anyone else saw, what anyone else had ever looked for. He knew this was the point where only the truth would set him free.

“Yeah, more times than I care to remember. But, Nat, I swear they meant nothing, and you… my God, you mean everything.”

“I know. That’s my point. You’ve had that before with other people and I need to know if this was different. It felt like it was different than I thought it was supposed to be. It…sort of…felt like…more.” She stumbled through her own confusion.

He reclined in her bed and guided her onto his chest. “It was more. More than anything I have ever experienced, more than anything I could ever have fathomed, and you gave me more than I will ever have to give to you but I swear, I’ll be more somehow.” There, the truth, both barren and bold, hollow and hallowed, all he was, and all he ever hoped to be for her.

“But you did. You gave me everything. Thank you for that. You don’t need to be more for me.”

“Trust me, I’m the one who should be thanking you. Are you sore, honey? I can give you a bath. It’ll ease a little of the strain.”

“We just took a shower. I’m okay. I just want you to hold me.”

He strengthened his arms around her. “I don’t ever want to let go.”

“Good.”

He watched her sleep as the sun pierced the darkness bringing a hesitant glow to the deep purple night. Aaron shifted his body to keep it from awakening her. He needed to go read that damned letter but he couldn’t let her go. She needed him and he would never let her down.

Tucking her hair behind her shoulders, he let himself drift on the edge of sleep as her scent and her warmth contented him. A relaxation he had no recollection of ever experiencing before kept him at ease.

The memories he both hated and refused to forget were too far away to be reached that night. She kept them at bay. An angel to pull him from the depths of hell where he’d resided for so long he no longer knew which way was up. She took his hands and guided him home.

The nightmare always started the same way. Natalie tried to shake free from it. The skirt of the dress that matched Holly’s, the ones their grandmother had given them, flew out to the sides as she jumped from hay bale to hay bale. The wind lifted the dress higher.

Uncle Mick leaned against the barn. Three broken beer bottles were at his feet. Another was in his hand.

No.

Her fists collided with something. Skin and muscle. Someone.

“Nat!” His voice tried to reach through the terror. “Baby, wake up.” She couldn’t reach it. Her uncle’s hands gripped her arms. They held her captive. She couldn’t run.

Someone sat her up and shook her. “Natalie, baby, it’s okay. Wake up for me.”

She clung to something. His arms. A lifeline.

“Natalie!”

His voice shattered the icy hands that held her captive. Her eyes flew open. Air rushed into her lungs in a frantic gasp. Aaron’s gentle hands cupped her face. “Look at me, Nat. Right here. You’re right here with me. You’re safe. I’ve got you. It’s over, sweetheart. Never again. Okay, I will never let someone hurt you again.”

She collapsed into him and washed his chest with another round of tears her uncle didn’t deserve and she hated herself for crying in the first place.

“Deep breaths for me, okay. I’ve got you,” he kept speaking the words that steadied her breaths and her heartbeat. “I’m right here. I will always keep you safe.”

She tucked herself closer to him. He wrapped his arms and legs around her, a shield against her past. His right hand cradled her head, keeping her from having to see anything at all.

His left hand pulled the sheets up over them. He covered her completely. “I’ve got you, baby.” His kisses wiped away every escaping tear. His hands kept her in the here and now. She just needed him to stay forever. If he was there, nothing could get to her. She was safe. “I’m right here.”