Chapter 9
I think we dream so we don’t have to be apart for so long. If we’re in each other’s dreams, then we don’t have to be apart for so long.
-Winnie the Pooh
Winter
After getting Tai settled in the second guest bedroom of Adam’s house, Jack took a seat at the computer and I took a seat on the couch looking through old photo albums. Sons of Anarchy was playing in the background but I was ignoring it since my favorite character was being a bad boy and cheating on his wife.
“What are you doing?” Jack asked me curiously.
I looked up at him and saw him staring at me as if he thought I was a crazy loon. Although, now that I looked at myself, I probably did look stupid. My hands were covering my ears while trying in vain to block out the moans coming from the TV.
“I don’t like this part.” I said lamely, keeping my hands over my ears.
He rolled his eyes, and then glanced at the screen. “What the fuck are you watching?”
“What I’m not watching is my favorite character having sex with a club whore while his wife’s in prison. What I’m not watching is my respect for the man dwindling down to the barest of threads. I think I can’t watch this show anymore. I could deal with the drugs, the killing, and all that fun stuff, but I cannot abide a man cheating. That’s just wrong and fucked up. I would never be able to stay with a man who did that to me.” I spat.
By the time I was done with my tirade, I wasn’t sure if I was talking about the actor on the screen or just men in general.
Over the past three weeks, I’ve been seriously wondering how a man like Jack could have gone seven years without having sex. I mean, come on, the man thought I was dead. Wouldn’t a man have those needs, regardless of if he had a dead wife or not? Who could blame him?
It was then I started to get mad. If I’d been able to make it seven years and not do anyone, surely he would too. Yet, I didn’t feel comfortable asking him those questions, because I wasn’t sure I would like the answer if I did. I knew I was being irrational, but I was mad. Furthermore, the man hadn’t even made a move towards me yet.
He hadn’t done anything more than just give me a peck on the lips and a hug here and there. Neither did he hold me at night. Once he thought I was asleep, he would roll over and put as much distance in between us as the bed would allow. I was starting to feel unwanted.
“Well, we wouldn’t have that problem. You’d never go to prison.” He said distractedly, as he turned back to the computer.
“I would if I shot somebody.” I murmured darkly.
Him, for instance.
“First of all, you’d never have to, because I’d do that for you if the need ever arose. Secondly, if you did have to, that would mean I was seriously injured, and I would take your place. You wouldn’t go to prison. I wouldn’t allow it.” He said with conviction.
My head shot up when he said that, and my eyes connected with his. “You can’t tell me I can’t go to prison!” I all but yelled, tossing the photo album down so it spilled open at some random page. “I can take care of myself!”
If I were being honest with myself, I would know that I wasn’t making any lick of sense. The shit that was coming out of my mouth wasn’t connected with my brain at the moment. It was connected to my heart. I was an emotional mess. I was so beyond tired of not having what I wanted. And what I wanted was him.
Jack came up from his seat at the computer and whirled around to face me. “I don’t want you to have to face anything by yourself! Ever again! Over my dead body will anything ever hurt you. If anything even tries, I will rip it to goddamned pieces. Those fragments will be so goddamn small that you won’t even be able to tell what it used to be; not one single piece will even remotely resemble what used to be a human being. You’re fucking mine.” He roared.
“If I was fucking ‘yours,’” I sneered. “Why the hell won’t you freaking touch me?”
His mouth opened and closed a few times as his eyes were lit like hot black coals. “I’ve wanted to touch you for seven mother fucking years!” He seethed. “If I touched you now, it wouldn’t be what you deserved. It would be raw. It would be need. It would be…”
“It would be us.” I said quietly, interrupting him.
Then he was on me. What we did next could only be described as fucking. Yes, there was love involved, but that love was balled into so much need that it was unstoppable.
His hands went to the base of my butt, where my ass cheeks met the back of my thighs. Lifting me effortlessly, I wrapped my legs around him. The dress I was still wearing rode up until the barest hint of panties showed. Our mouths met in a whirlwind. Within milliseconds, my mouth was opening to allow his seeking tongue entrance.
Jack growled low in his throat as he encountered my lace boy short panties with his fingers. His hand traveled to the juncture of my thighs, took a heaping handful of fabric, and wrenched hard. He ripped the panties free of my body with a tearing sound. It was so hard and sudden, that I gasped into his mouth.
Seconds later, I felt him fumbling with the zipper of his jeans. The rasping sound of them unzipping only fueled the boiling blood in my veins. It coursed harder, rapidly sending blood down to my clit, making it pulse with need.
The hot, blunt crown of his penis ran the length of my outer lips. At the first touch of the head against my clit, I detonated. Throwing my head back, I cried out in surprise as lights danced at the back of my eyes.
Seven years of buildup detonated through me like a punch to my entire body.
Jack’s large, and by large I mean fucking huge, erection started to press inside of me, and I was right there on the brink of climax yet again. With a few short thrusts and then a deep plunge, Jack was deeply embedded inside of me.
“Do it.” I demanded huskily.
I was filled to the brink of too full, but my body didn’t seem to care. Didn’t care that I was just as tight now after seven years of nothing but a few fingers entering, than I was when I’d lost my virginity in the first place.
I was bouncing against him uncontrollably, trying to get him to move faster, harder. However, the man had plans of his own. Leaning me back over the back of the couch and down the arm, he pulled out nearly all the way, and then slammed back inside me. Hard.
He looked into my eyes, as if in confirmation that I was all right. Satisfied with what he saw, he let go of his iron control and took me. Deep hard stroke after deep hard stroke, filled me up to bursting.
Not satisfied with the fact that I was still wearing ninety-nine percent of my clothes, he started yanking at the neck of my dress trying to undo the buttons. The first three were easy for him, but when he got to the zipper, he was over the hassle. Fisting the two sides of the fabric, he gave one sharp pull and my dress tore at the seams.
“This was a fifty dollar dress!” I panted.
“Fuck the dress.” He grunted.
Pulling down on the cups of my bra, my breasts bounced free, and he gave a sigh of relief. Cupping them in the palm of his hands, he leaned down and desperately sucked one, and then the other. Flicking his tongue over the turgid tip in between sucks.
“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” He said, getting back up to his feet and taking my hips in his hands.
Each stroke of his cock inside me started me up that peak again and soon I found myself teetering on the edge. Sensing my pending orgasm, Jack reached forward and took one nipple between his fingers, twisting hard.
That roughness was just what I needed and it sent me hurdling over the edge. Back bowing up, I flew apart, shattering into a million pieces.
Distantly I heard Jack’s growl of completion follow immediately after mine, but I was too lost in my own little world to acknowledge it.
Coming back to earth, I found myself squished in between Jack and the couch arm. My breasts were smashed up against his sweatshirt-clad chest, rubbing nicely over the soft fabric. Jack’s head was buried in the crook of my neck, and he was panting so hard, I worried that I would have to get him a paper bag if he didn’t slow his breathing down.
“God, I’ve missed you.” He rasped.
“I’ve missed you, too. I may not have remembered that you were mine, but deep inside, I knew something big was missing. It’s what’s stopped me from ever moving forward.” I said quietly.
“The same goes for me, Winnie. You were my one and only. It’s only ever been you.” He said staring intently into my eyes.
“You weren’t a virgin before I met you.” I said with a laugh in my voice.
“You remember that?” He asked.
“Yep. Now, get off me. I don’t want to ruin Adam’s couch, and your brother is asleep in the other room. You don’t want him to see my lady lumps, do you?” I asked, blinking my eyes rapidly.
“Too late! You two have always been loud! Not to mention that y’all are about three feet away from my bed.” Tai yelled from the other room.
My face blushed scarlet and I buried my face into my hands. Jack laughed, but disengaged and helped me stand to my feet. I was happy that there was a dress underneath my bottom; otherwise, we would have made one heck of a mess.
Tucking himself back into his jeans, he gave me a soft peck on the lips before walking back over to the computer. I, on the other hand, had to clutch the tattered remains of my dress together and walk fast to the bathroom.
Taking care of business, I threw the dress into the trash and then came up short. My only clothes were in the guest bedroom, which was across the house from the bathroom I’d just gone into.
Spying a robe hanging on the bathroom door, I reached up and pulled it down. Slipping my hands into it, I heard the rustle of paper. I tied the robe securely around my middle before reaching my hand into the pocket and withdrawing a folded note.
Brows furrowed in confusion, I shoved it all back into the pocket before washing my hands and walking quickly back to Jack. Jack was still where I left him, only this time he was immersed in his business of deleting porn from his best friend’s computer.
“Jack! Look at this.” I demanded once I reached his side.
He looked up, took in what I was wearing, and then reached for the piece of paper and jump drive I was holding out to him. “Where’d you find this?”
Pointing down at the robe pocket, I waited for him to see the significance.
“Is that the one you bought him?” He finally asked.
“Yes.” I nodded vigorously.
“The one he said he’d cherish forever. The one he said you could have when he died?” He confirmed.
It’d hit me as soon as I crossed the threshold of the living room. Why that robe was so important. It was the one and only gift I’d ever given anyone. The day he “fake” married me, I gave him that robe as a gift. It was made of flannel and it had a picture of Tweety Bird on it saying, ‘I do, I do.’
I’d thought it fit the situation perfectly and he did as well. His promise to me was that he would cherish it forever and always. From what I remembered, he even got it professionally preserved as women do their wedding dresses. Initially, it’d been a joke, but he kept it in that packaging, if only because there was no reason to take it out.
Yet, for it to be hanging on the guest bathroom door there had to be some significance to it.
Flipping open the note, Jack read it. Then he re-read it. Looking up at me, he was extremely confused. Not that I could blame him, I was confused by the note, too.
“All you’ve got to do is remember. Same place. Same password.” Jack read gruffly.
His eyes caught mine and studied me.
My eyes closed, and I strained to remember. Something. It was a whisper. A brush against my consciousness, and then it was gone. “I don’t remember. I remember mostly everything from before. I can tell you what we did all the way up until the day you left. Then nothing.”
“Don’t strain. It’ll come. Come sit down with me and we’ll go over the computer.” He said, tapping his lap for emphasis.
I went willingly, sitting down gingerly. I made sure my robe didn’t expose anything important, and leaned back against his chest. Why I bothered, seeing as he’d just seen all those important things, and more, just a few moments ago was anyone’s guess. His arm came around me, settling just underneath my breasts and we went to work.
An hour and three porn folders later, we weren’t any closer to anything than when we started. “I can’t believe he hid that under your name!”
Jack snorted behind me. “The man knew I’d find it and get a kick out of it. He’s crazy like that. Was crazy like that.” He corrected.
I cupped the back of his head with the palm of my hand, patting lightly twice before standing and stretching my arms over my head. My robe gaped open a few inches and I found myself propped up on the computer desk with my ass on the keys. Jack’s body was in between mine in the next instant, and I was lost.
“Goddamn, but you undo me. You don’t even know that you do, either. That’s what makes you so sexy.” He muttered against the side of neck.
His lips traveled from just below my ear giving wet kisses all the way down until encountered the collar of the robe. His left hand moved up slowly until he reached the collar and then slowly pulled it aside, baring my top half to his seeking eyes.
His other hand tangled in my hair but stopped when his fingers tangled up with my hair band. Wasting no time, he deftly removed it with a flick of his fingers and my crazy curls cascaded down my back and over my chest.
“That’s better.” He whispered against my collarbone.
Grabbing my hair in his fist, he pulled back just hard enough that a tingle of pain coursed through my body. Legs working on their own volition, circled his hips, and pulled him closer so his crotch was snugged close to mine.
The hard line of his cock worked its way up and down my slit. Just as he was lifting the thin fabric of my robe out of the way, a hoarse rasping shout came from the room that Tai was sleeping in.
Nothing could have brought us down faster. Instantly, we broke apart. The sprint to his room took only a few seconds, but it felt like a lifetime. Each cry of dismay coming from Tai was heartbreaking.
“No, no, no. He’s still in there. Fuck!” Tai said as he thrashed on the bed.
I flipped the light on as Jack went to his brother and put a hand on his chest. His skin was slick with sweat. His face ashen. The black t-shirt and black sweats he was wearing were sopping. His breathing was rapid. Almost too rapid.
Going to his other side, I felt his skin. He was most definitely running a fever, which isn’t surprising since you run a high risk of infection with burns. Seeing as he should have still been in the hospital was another thing. He wasn’t healthy enough to be out, but Jack and I knew he needed us more.
I went to the living room, grabbed my purse, and searched around for the Tylenol. Finding it, I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and went back to the room to see Jack holding his brother in his arms, telling him something too soft for me to hear.
Tai’s eyes found mine as I approached his other side. Confusion clouded his eyes for a few moments before recognition dawned. Shaking himself once, he held out his hand when he saw me offering the Tylenol, crunched on them once, and then swallowed them dry.
Shaking the water at him I said, “I brought this for a reason.”
“How about some Jack instead?” He rasped.
His voice was hoarse from his yelling.
Jack leaned him back against the pillows gently, and then studied his face for a few moments before coming to a conclusion. “You’re coming home with me.”
“Fuck that. I’m staying.” Tai ground out.
They’d been like oil and water since the first time I’d met them. Jack was his father’s son, while Tai was most definitely not. Jack said that Tai changed when his sister died, and ever since then he’d been hard and unapproachable.
They loved each other, it was blatantly obvious. However, they fought as if they hated each other. Jack was hard and unrelenting when it came to his brother. Tai didn’t help matters. He was a partier when I’d first met him. Fucking away his college years with drinking and sex, while his dad paid for college that he couldn’t afford.
Jack had taken pity on his father and joined the army right out of high school. He knew he couldn’t add anything on his father’s plate. He had hospital bills out the wazoo from those three months that his daughter, Jack and Tai’s sister, was fighting for her life.
Although Catori had insurance, it wasn’t enough to cover the cost it took to keep her alive. Therefore, Mr. Stoker had taken it upon himself to help, but in the end it hadn’t been enough. She’d died despite the care she was getting and, according to Jack, her death is what started Tai into the downward spiral he’d taken.
However, that must have changed in the seven years I’d been gone, because now he was a firefighter. He had his own place. His own car. He also seemed to have a somewhat better relationship with his brother as well.
“I have to get back to work.” Tai gritted out through clenched teeth.
“You can’t work for another month. Something fucked up happened with that fire. You and I both know it. Adam knew it. The Chief knows it. Hell, even the damn media knows it. I want you safe while you heal.” Jack explained roughly.
My eyes went from Tai’s troubled ones to Jack’s stubborn ones. My brows wrinkled in confusion. This was the first time in four days that I had even thought about the fire that took Adam’s life. I hadn’t even been aware that it was suspicious in any way, which made me even more confused. Why was this the first time I was hearing about this?
Opening my mouth to say something, Jack’s sudden harsh frown stopped me in my tracks. Snapping my mouth shut, I gritted my teeth and waited to question him like the Spanish Inquisition.
“A week.” Tai said reluctantly.
Knowing that was about all he would get out of Tai, Jack stood and walked to the bedroom door. He held his hand out for me and waited, knowing I would come to him. Which I did. Placing my hand in his, he pulled me along, shutting the door behind him gently.
“Thank you for waiting.” He said quietly, as I followed in his wake.
I didn’t say you’re welcome, because honestly, I was still rather pissed that I was just now learning that something was wrong. “Whatever.”
“Uh, oh. That’s a deadly word in woman speak.” He said lightly as he closed the door behind us.
Walking to the lamp, I snapped it on and turned back to him. “Tell me.”
Letting out a slow breath, he sat down on the side of the bed and pulled me down beside him. “It was arson. Explosives were found in the underground parking garage. It was blatantly obvious, which I think was the point. Something Adam was doing was setting off alarm bells to whomever he had his sights set on. I’d called him and asked him to look into your sister and her ex-boyfriend; as well as your disappearance. I’d only had one call from him since then saying he wasn’t getting anything. Then I had the call that he was killed. It was most definitely not an accident, either. It was a call about a hurt child. There was never a child found. The child’s name was said to be Winter.”
The last of that explanation was dropped like a bomb, and my body went tight as a bow string. “What?”
He nodded in confirmation. “Yeah. We’re leaving tomorrow. I don’t feel comfortable having you here anymore.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked.
“I didn’t want to.” He said simply.
Okay.
“I guess you think that’s alright?” I asked with a forced serious tone.
He probably could have said anything else and I’d have been pissed. However, he told me the God’s honest truth. It was plain and simple. It was Jack. He didn’t pull his punches. He said what he meant. He did what he thought was right and he would protect anyone he loved with his life.
“Yes.”
My God, it was like talking to a wall sometimes.
Getting up from the bed, I walked to the chair that was holding my bag. Removing the white t-shirt I’d worn to bed every night since I’d gotten out of the hospital, I slipped it over my head and turned to see Jack staring at me with a dark expression on his face.
“You still have that?” He asked in awe.
My brows puckered and I looked at him questioningly. Moving to me with purposeful strides, he fisted the t-shirt in his hands and held it away from my body. “This.”
“Yeah, what’s the problem?”
“Absolutely nothing. It just makes me happy that you had something of me all those years.” He said simply.
My throat clogged and I put my arms around his neck. “I’ve worn it every single night for the past seven years. Even when it needed to be washed, I waited for it dry before going to bed. I’m not sure how much longer it’ll hold up, so it’s a good thing I found you so I can steal another one.”
“Yes, ma’am. Steal anything you like.”