Epilogue
Some people care too much. I think it’s called love.
-Winnie the Pooh
Winter
“You can pat the seat all day long. There’s no way I’m getting on that thing in this dress. Why the heck am I even wearing this anyway?” I scoffed.
Jack was now cane free for two weeks. It’d been eight since the kidnapping and explosion, and he’d been bugging me to get on his bike with him all day.
“I, Jack Kennedy Stoker, do solemnly swear that I will only take you just down the road. And I will not go over ten miles an hour. Scout’s honor. ” He said holding up his fingers.
Rolling my eyes, I decided that he couldn’t get away with the cuteness. “That’s Spock’s sign, not the boy scout’s sign.”
“Balk!” He said, clucking like a chicken.
“Jack,” I said, turning to the side and showing off my baby bump. “How the hell do you expect me to hold on to you if I have this?”
I was now seventeen weeks and most definitely showing.
“Just get on.” He demanded.
Sighing, I did as instructed, and found myself still able to get close to him, even with the baby bump between us. “Where’re we going?”
“Patience is a virtue.”
“Fuck patience. Tell me.” I demanded.
He didn’t. Instead, he started the bike with a roar, cutting off my demand.
The baby did the usual and started doing the fluttering that I so loved. Anytime she heard the bike’s rumbling, she woke. I had a feeling I had a bike lover on my hands.
True to his word, we didn’t go over ten miles an hour. We rode around the garage, and then across the forecourt, until we reached the edge of a field where a tent was set up.
My brows puckered, but due to the noise, I couldn’t ask Jack what was going on. It looked like a party was set up, but it wasn’t until I was closer that I saw that all of our friends and family were there waiting for us to arrive.
He turned the bike off just as we got to the walkway that had recently been mowed. How thoughtful of them.
Jack swung his leg over the bike and stood holding his hand out to me. “Winnie?”
I laid my hand in his. “Yeah?”
“Will you marry me?”
My mouth dropped open, and it was then that I took in the preacher that was standing at the front of the tent. “Really?”
“Yeah.”
“Every damn day and twice on Sunday!” I exclaimed, throwing my arms around his neck.
***
Winter
Five months later
“Hello?” I answered.
“Please, for the love of all that’s holy, turn the bike off.” Ember pleaded.
I grimaced. “If we turn the bike off, she wakes up.”
“Yeah?” Ember groaned. “Well if you turn the bike off, the rest of us can sleep.” Is this Ember or Cheyenne speaking? Are they on three way?
“Is Gabe awake?” I asked.
Hesitation.
“No.” She finally admitted.
“The kids?” I asked.
“No.”
Honestly, after a truly god awful labor of 43 hours, zero sleep in the hospital, followed by two days of non-stop crying when somebody wasn’t constantly bouncing or letting her listen to Jack’s bike, I needed the peace and quiet. They’d slept, I hadn’t.
“Well, then you’re on your own. I haven’t slept in sixteen hours. I need a nap.” I said before I turned the phone on silent and went back to sleep.
Hours later, I woke to a quiet house.
Unease rippled through me when I realized that it’d been hours since I’d heard Cat cry. I jumped out of bed and ran to the living room only to stop dead when I saw the most heartwarming vision of my life.
Jack was on his back, in the recliner, fast asleep, with a sleeping Cat on his chest, scrunched up with her legs and hands underneath her body. A little puddle of drool...or was that spit up... pooled on his chest where her mouth lay open on top of him.
Her little tiny hand was splayed out over Jack’s chest directly on top of the tattoo he’d gotten the day he got his cast removed from his leg. It was a series of heartbeats across his chest that looked like they’ve been ripped from his chest.
I’d been confused at first, but then he explained that they were Cat’s first heartbeats. The first ones we’d ever heard. The beats had been on the sonogram photo that we’d received before leaving the office. He’d then taken the picture to the tattoo shop and had them permanently inked into his skin.
Walking quietly back to my room, I grabbed my phone so I could capture the Kodak moment.
“You’re going to need to stop. It’s already getting old.” Jack rumbled with his eyes still closed.
“Never.”
***
Jack
Four years later
“Daddy.”
I turned over in bed when I heard Catori say my name. She was standing at the foot of the bed, and I raised up on an elbow to get a better look at her.
Her hair was a curly mess around her face. You could tell that she’d been sleeping hard because half of the curls were plastered in drool on the side of her face.
The black curls stood out starkly against her porcelain skin, and my fingers itched to move it back away from her face. Even more, I wished to cut it, but Winter refused.
“What, baby?” I asked her softly.
Winter was at work, and I knew what she really wanted was to come sleep in the bed, which was often the case when mommy was gone. Secretly, I loved it. We did it every night Winter was working, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Her tiny little body crawled up carefully into the bed, and I held the covers aside so she could crawl underneath.
“My sisters said to tell you hi.” She said as she snuggled close.
My body froze.
Not because her icy toes were buried under my stomach, but because she mentioned her sisters.
Winter and I’d discussed this at length, and agreed that we wouldn’t be telling Catori about this until she was old enough to understand. Which wasn’t going to be for quite a while yet.
If my asshole brother told her, I was going to kill him. “What do you mean your sisters said to tell me hi?”
“I dream about them all the time. Sometimes they talk to me. Sometimes we just play tea party and watch La Oopsey.”
La La Loopsey was her favorite show. She had a ‘La Oopsey’ nightshirt that she had to have on every night or she’d bug the absolute daylights out of you until she had it on. Then she had to be in her ‘La Oopsey’ sleeping bag, with her ‘La Oopsey’ pillow underneath her head, and she was perfect.
She’d never been the type of child to make up imaginary friends, so I knew she was serious. Or at least thought she was.
“Tell me about these sisters of yours, baby.”
“Tanis is older than Meli by seven years. Meli is my age, and has hair exactly like mine. She says she’s not cutting it because mommy would be mad at her if she did. Tanis has mommy’s red hair, but it’s straight like yours. Why can’t they stay with us, daddy?”
Nothing would come out. I was speechless. My four-year-old daughter had surprised me so much that I literally could think of nothing to say that would make this situation any easier.
“A long time ago, both of your sister’s went to heaven to stay with your Grandpa, your Aunt Catori, and Uncle Adam. I made that dream catcher over your bed for that very reason. I wanted your family to be able to visit you in your dreams. To know you as I know you, and what better way to do that than while you’re sleeping?” I whispered against her silky hair.
I ran my beard against the side of her face and she squealed. Which, in turn, woke her baby brother up, who was sleeping beside the bed in a bassinet.
“You’ve gone and done it now.” I laughed and Adam started the grunting and whimpering thing that was the opening act to his drama-filled show.
He was the total opposite of Catori. When Catori was a baby, she was so laid back and mellow compared to Adam. Adam was a momma’s boy through and through, whereas Catori would go to anyone and everyone as long as they held her and never let her go.
Which is why she always slept on my chest. And why she still did so at four years old.
Adam, however, was very independent. At two months old, he wanted nothing more than to be on the floor exploring, and he wouldn’t sleep anywhere but in his bed. Not that I didn’t try to pull him into bed with us. Sometimes I even succeeded in getting him to fall asleep, much to Winter’s chagrin.
She didn’t think it was as cute as I did when Cat slipped in between us in the middle of the night.
I picked Adam up and groaned when I felt how big he was getting. The boy reminded me of the Michelin Man with his rolls and rolls of fat. The doctor loved to say that Winter needed to cut down on her calories so we could put Adam on a diet as well, seeing as he breast fed with the voracity of a Hoover Vacuum Cleaner.
Glancing at the clock, I decided to wait the fifteen minutes it would take for Winter to get here. She got off shift about five minutes ago, and if I could find something to occupy the boy with, he could have it straight from the source instead of the bottle.
Ten gruesome minutes later, Winter walked into the bedroom shrugging off her uniform top and kicking off her shoes.
“Oh, boy! You shouldn’t have waited.” Winter laughed as she eased Adam out of my arms and snuggled him up to her breast.
She flipped the top down and the boy latched on so fast that she winced. “Jesus, he’s got a stronger suction than you!” She laughed.
“We could always try it out later and you can compare.” I raised my brows suggestively.
“Actually, that sounds wonderful. You know, I got the all clear yesterday before work.” She smiled.
“The all clear for what, mama?” Cat asked.
Winter turned beat red and averted her face. “Nothing.”
Laughing, I blew raspberries into Cat’s neck making her shriek, interrupting the feast that Adam was having. He started to cry in between ravenous sucks, so I stopped and let him have his meal uninterrupted.
“Alright, Cat, let’s go get dressed. Daddy’s got some work to do. You get to stay with Uncle Tai today. Sound fun?” I asked as I stood and stretched.
I made sure to make it extra-long when I caught Winter’s eyes on me. She was watching the muscles in my stomach play.
“Yes!” She squealed.
“All right, go grab some clothes,” I didn’t get the words out before she was gone in a flash.
Tai loved her more than life itself. When Catori was born, it was as if the life came back into him with each breath she took. Ever since then, he’d doted on her. He even moved here and joined the KFD all because he couldn’t bear to not see her for long periods of time.
“What time do you have to pick up the bounce house?” Winter asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. Ten maybe? What does it matter, the party doesn’t start until three.”
“Get it as soon as possible. The kids aren’t the only ones that want to play with it.” She laughed.
That was true enough. The adults were looking forward to it just as much as the kids. We’d gotten it for Cat’s third birthday as well, adding water to it, which made it more like a slip and slide than a bounce house.
The extra fee was worth it. Apparently, we didn’t read the fine print when we rented it saying that water wasn’t allowed on it.
Who knew soap wasn’t either? Five grown men, soap, and a bounce house wasn’t a good combination.
“Yeah, I’ll get it early,” I said with a bright smile.
“Y’all aren’t going to reenact the WWF again, are you?” She asked suspiciously.
“We’ll see.”
***
Winter
“What are we shopping for?” Ember asked from beside me.
We were at Brookshire’s getting a few last minute snacks for Cat’s fourth birthday party. Really, we’d just run out of beer due to the fact that the so called ‘men,’ who acted more like adolescent boys, had been playing on the bounce house for eight hours straight. At least this time we’d thought ahead and rented two. One for the adults and one for the children.
“I don’t know. Beer and chips was what Jack told me before he shoved eighty bucks in my hand. They were wet, too.”
“Last year Gabe ended the night with a broken toe.” Ember laughed.
“Jack was sore as hell the next morning. He didn’t even want to get on the thing again.” I laughed as I remembered his moaning and groaning he was doing as he got out of bed that morning.
“As long as they don’t get the soap out again, this should go better. I’ll tell you one thing though. I’m sure as hell not going near that thing again.” She said.
I stopped as two teenagers stopped in the middle of the aisle cracking up about a display for condoms.
“Pick a lane, asshole!” Cat said from the front of the buggy.
My eyes squeezed tightly shut as I went through all the things I was going to do tonight to torture Jack. The boys, of course, thought it was funny. I didn’t in the least.
“I swear to God, I am going to kick his ass.” I said to Ember who was doing her upmost best not to laugh.
“That’s okay. Yesterday Cora told me she was going to fuck my face up.” Ember said, with a glare in Cora’s direction.
My mouth dropped open. “Jesus, who would’ve said that around her?”
“Gabe, of course. Stupid Call of Duty game. They get on there, and there are so many insults flying around that I can’t even stand to be in the same room. Then he bought these headphones because I complained about the noise, and it only makes him scream all the louder without realizing it.” She huffed.
We left the store ten minutes and two hundred dollars later. When we arrived back home, it was most obvious that the men weren’t good babysitters. Cheyenne, Payton, and Blaine were all outside watching the kids jump when they should have been sleeping.
Payton and Cheyenne because they worked the night shift last night, and Blaine because she was about eleven months pregnant and was ready to pop any second. Add to the fact that it was over one hundred degrees out here, and that didn’t make for a happy pregnant woman.
Taking the milkshake I got her from the cup holder, I walked over to her and handed it over. “Thank you,” She said as she fell upon it. “The boys got a tad distracted.”
“I can see that. They’re such little shits,” I said as I slipped my shoes off my feet.
“What’re you doing?” Payton asked warily. “You’re not going to get in there, are you?”
“Will you watch Adam for a few minutes?” I ignored her question.
“Yeah,” she answered hesitantly.
“I’ll be back.” I said in my best Arnold Schwarzenegger voice.
Her snickers followed me as I made my way to the bounce house. Really, it was more like a massive thing. Calling it a bounce house just wouldn’t do it justice. There was the flat bounce house part attached, but there was also a slide, and further beyond the slide it went into an obstacle course.
The men were spread out playing with dodge ball. As one would come down the slide, the others would try to peg the slider with the ball. The slider was trying to catch the ball and launch it at someone as hard as he could.
I was happy to see there was no soap, yet, but with the amount of beer and alcohol we bought, it would only be a matter of time.
A meaty thud made me turn and watch as James took Max down with a hard tackle. They continued grappling for a few minutes before breaking apart and continuing to play.
Still not able to find Jack, I started to take a step away from the obstacle portion when two strong arms encircled me from behind. Trapping me in their steely embrace.
“Jack!” I squealed right before he tossed me over his shoulder.
Not one to waste an opportunity as this one, he made sure to rub my ass through the shorts I was wearing as he climbed the steps into the bounce house. I looked down just in time to see him throw me through the air and land in a puddle of muddy water before diving over the side of the slide and plunging down before I could retaliate.
Looking around the area, I spied a little nook beside the stairs that would conceal me and crawled to it.
“Jack,” I yelled.
“What?” He yelled back suspicion in his tone.
“Do you smell that?” I yelled back.
He poked his head in but didn’t see me. “Smell what?”
Crawling in carefully, I waited for him to turn his back on me before taking out his legs at the knees. He recovered quickly, but by that time, I already had him on his back and my legs straddling his chest. My knees were in his armpits
“What The Rock is cooking!” I whispered, and then went for his nipples.
The man was a freaking rock when it came to anything but his nipples. He could go all day long with you tickling him, but you get anywhere near his sensitive nipples and he goes nuts.
His hands easily caught mine before I did much damage, and held them securely against his chest.
Jack’s laughter shook his chest, and made me very aware that his bare chest was underneath my thighs. “Jack?” I whispered huskily.
His hands ran up my thighs and then spanned the length of my hips. “Yeah?” He answered gruffly.
I leaned forward until my lips were against his ear, grinding myself down against him. “Can you go get the beer out of the car?”
He laughed. “Yeah, Win. I can.”
***
“As long as you’re living my baby you’ll be.” I whispered through my tears, and then gave Cat a kiss on her rosy cheek.
Kodiak gave a doggy sigh as I stepped over his large form taking up most of the space beside the foot of Cat’s bed.
Walking as quietly as I could out of the room, I managed to make it into bed before I broke down in tears. “Dammit, that book gets me every single time!”
He chuckled. “Why do you read it then?”
I sighed. “Because I always wished that my momma would read it to me.”
“You do know that it’s creepy, right?”
“His mother loved him.” I replied angrily.
“His mother was a creeper and a psycho. I mean, who sneaks into their child’s room when they’re an adult?” He asked with a smile in his voice.
“I’m going to.”
“You will not. You’ll get shot.”
“We’ll see.” I said stubbornly.
“You won’t.”
This was a seriously old argument, and I knew that this wouldn’t end well if I didn’t end it myself.
“I would have to say that today was very successful.” I said, snuggling close to Jack.
“Yeah, we’re going to have to add on to the house if she gets any more shit.” He agreed.
“Stormy sent a fucking jungle gym. It’ll get here Tuesday.” I told him.
“Joy to the world.” He said with barely contained enthusiasm.
Not. Stormy wasn’t a real part of our lives now that she moved up north. She came home on holidays, but that was it. She didn’t want anything to do with Texas, and seeing me and my children reminded her of how much she’d screwed up, or so she said.
Although it was devastating not to see her, I knew she needed to be away from here so she could heal. Yet, it wasn’t any easier when I was rewarded with a five-minute phone call every other week.
Shortly after I’d disappeared, my mother had shot herself in front of Stormy, killing both herself and our unborn sister. According to my sister, my mother had told her it was because she was devastated over what she’d witnessed, and, unfortunately, we’d never know.
Jack’s fingers tangled into the hair at the base of my neck. “You’re quiet.”
“Is it bad that I’m happy?” I asked quietly.
“No. Don’t you think we’ve suffered enough?” He asked.
“Yeah,” I whispered. “I do.”
“We’ve been lucky so far, but nothing will ever stop me from living each day like it’s the last day of my life. Too much has happened. We’ve lost too much time together. We’ve lost family that we loved. I think it’s time to stop worrying if we should be happy, and just be happy. They’d want that for us.”
“I love you, Jack.”
“Love you too, Win.”