Selena

 

Imagine my surprise when the cab pulled up to the address and it was the Boys and Girls Club. I hadn't for a moment considered that Logan might want to meet me here. I hadn't thought he was the kind of person to set foot in places like this. I'd thought the children's DVDs would be for his niece or nephew or something.

 

And I'd even been skeptical about that part.

 

Five big bikers lay on the grass eating sandwiches like school children when I got out of the car and Logan was the first to come to me. He smiled at me like he was genuinely happy to see me. I was still upset but something inside me melted a little when he did. I pushed it away. I didn't want to feel this way about him until I knew what I was feeling and I knew where I stood with him. Right now it felt like I was just another woman to him, a notch on his bedpost.

 

I noticed other things, too. Motorcycles - five of them - placed strategically on the law and equipment, too. Things like spanners and wrenches and oilcans. Judging by the grease on the boys' arms they'd been working on their bikes.

 

There were books on the lawn, too. Some open, some closed, all on motorcycle maintenance, and all from my branch.

 

So this was what he'd been doing.

 

The revelation was a kind one. It made me see him in a different light. I still didn't think much of his ways of getting out of fines but somehow the fact that he'd gotten fines in the first place was a lot more forgivable now that I saw he didn't just leave everything lying around. He was using them.

 

The door flew open and a horde of children of all ages ran out. A lot of them had grease on their arms and clothes, too, and it wasn't hard to put two and two together and realize these five badass bikers were teaching children something that could benefit them. I looked at Logan and saw someone completely different.

 

I didn't have time to think about it for very long. The children crowded around me, tugging on my clothes, all talking at once.

 

"You're Logan's friend." "He said you were coming." "Do you want a sandwich?" "Are you his girlfriend?" There were so many questions and I could avoid answering most of them, including the one about me being Logan's girlfriend. I wasn't right to make a decision on that one yet. I was getting pulled in different directions - the contrast between last night and today was crazy.

 

"Miss Selena is going to tell you all a story," Logan said and for a moment I was back to my anger.

 

Who was he to volunteer my services? But then the kids looked at me with such expectant faces and such joy that I couldn't say no to them. I could say no to Logan, and maybe later I would, but I wouldn't say no to them. I smiled at them and made sure they were all eating.

 

The caregiver brought out a chair and I sat down, and like one organism the kids all sat down and looked at me with bright eyes, chins on their hands or hands in their laps. They were adorable. I could see why anyone would want to come back here and spend more time with them - even if being with them had only been community service at first.

 

"Does anyone know the story about the Three Billy Goats Gruff?"

 

Some of the kids shouted yes. Others looked around like they should have known but didn't.

 

"Well, you've got the story all wrong. And if you haven't heard it before, you'll hear the true version right from the start."

 

I glanced at Logan. He stood with his arms folded, watching me with a smile. Another biker stood next to him with the same stance and they seemed like brothers although they didn't look the same.

 

"Right. Well, once upon a time in a far away land there were three goats. They all had the same name. Gruff. The first Billy Goat Gruff was the smallest of the three with a tiny squeaky voice. The second Billy Goat Gruff was a little bigger and his voice was a little louder and a little stronger, too. The third Billy Goat Gruff was much bigger with a big scary voice and curly horns that made everyone scared of him. The three goats were best friends.

 

One day the three Billy Goats Gruff decided to go up the mountain to have some delicious grass that would fill them up for the entire winter. The first Billy Goat Gruff, the littlest one, went first.

 

Trip, trap, trip, trap, his hooves went on the bridge.

 

Now, under the bridge there lived a big, nasty troll named Logan."

 

The kids squealed with laughter. When I looked at Logan he pulled a face but he was smiling.

 

"Hunger the troll was selfish. He wanted to eat all the goats and refused them to go up to the pasture to have their grass.

 

'Who's tripping on my bridge?' he called. The littlest Billy Goat Gruff answered him in a tiny voice, 'it's only me, the first Billy Goat Gruff.'

 

'You can't cross my bridge,' Troll Logan said."

 

Logan walked to the front of the group, standing next to my chair. "You can't cross my bridge," he said in a bellowing voice. "I'm going to eat you." I smiled. The kids laughed and pointed.

 

"'Oh, no. You can't eat me, I'm too little,' the first Billy goat Gruff said in a trembling voice. 'I still need to fatten up. Wait for the second Billy Goat Gruff. He's bigger.'

 

The little Billy Goat Gruff crossed the bridge safely and went on to the pastures where he could eat enough for winter.

 

The second Billy Goat Gruff arrived and started crossing the bridge. Trip, Trap, Trip, Trap."

 

"Who's tripping on my bridge?" Logan bellowed next to me and I jumped a little.

 

The kids all shouted together, "The second goat!"

 

"That's right It's me, the second Billy Goat Gruff,' said the goat. 'I'm going to the meadow to eat grass for winter."

 

"You can't cross my bridge," Logan said in a loud voice. This time I expected it and it didn't startle me. "I'm going to gobble you up."

 

"'Oh, no. You can't eat me. I'm not nearly big enough,' the second Billy Goat Gruff said in a voice that was a little deeper than the first Billy Goat Gruff's voice. 'Wait for the third Billy Goat. He's much bigger than I am. I still need to get fat.'"

 

"Fine," Logan huffed.

 

"The third Billy Goat Gruff came over the bridge," I carried on. "Trip, Trap, Trip, Trap."

 

"Who's tripping on my bridge?" Logan was really into it now.

 

"It's me, the third Billy Goat Gruff and I'm going to the pasture to eat.' His voice was strong and loud and fearsome."

 

"Oh no you don't. I'm going to gobble you up," Troll Logan said.

 

"The third Billy Goat Gruff wasn't scared because he was big enough. He bleated loudly and his voice was like thunder. 'You're not going to eat me. If you try I'm going to poke your eyes with my horns and I'm going to crush you with my hooves.'”

 

"I'd like to see you try."

 

"The troll came out of his lair under the bridge and tried to eat the third Billy Goat Gruff, but just as he'd promised, the third Billy Goat Gruff poked the troll in the eyes with his horns."

 

Logan clutched his eyes and stumbled around. The kids were hysterical laughing at it.

 

"He trampled the troll with his hooves and the troll fell down the mountainside and into a ditch where he couldn't reach any goats to eat them anymore. For all his meanness, all the troll had left now was pain."

 

Logan had rolled onto the floor and played dead. He peeked at me with one eye. I wondered if he caught the double meaning to my story. When he sat up the kids all clapped their little hands and smiled and I had to admit that entertaining them and making them smile really was a great feeling. Logan got up and dusted himself.

 

"Do you guys think I'm a bad troll?" Logan asked.

 

"Yes!" The kids cried in unison.

 

Logan feigned offense and they laughed. The other bikers were laughing, too. The one that had been standing next to Logan with the serious eyes looked at me as if he was trying to size me up. I wasn't sure what his deal was. I had the feeling he was measuring me to see if I was found wanting. I wished I knew.

 

"Isn't she amazing?" Logan asked, putting an arm around my waist.

 

"She is your girlfriend!" One of the boys shouted.

 

Logan laughed and nodded.

 

I stepped away from him and smiled but I felt uncomfortable. I still didn't know how I felt about everything that had happened. We still needed to talk. I didn't want to be seen as his girlfriend without us talking about what happened, without him even asking me officially. Sure, they were just kids, but his friends were here, too. Call me old-fashioned but I wanted it done the right way.

 

The caregiver came out and called the kids in for a movie. The bikers started clearing their bikes and equipment and I helped, closing the books and stacking them in a pile by the door.

 

When everything was packed away Logan walked toward me. "Thanks for doing this. The kids loved the story."

 

He leaned forward and pressed his lips against mine. The kiss was unexpected and I was still angry but I didn't push him away right away the way I should have. He still had that seriously magnetic pull to him that made me want to kiss him back and keep kissing him until there was no kissing left to do.

 

I managed to break the kiss after a moment. I raised my eyebrows at him. "It was a pleasure doing it for them, but you didn't really give me much choice."

 

"I wanted to surprise you."

 

I nodded. "You did. I was very impressed when the address brought me here. I was less impressed with you volunteering me for something, volunteering a relationship status that's not necessarily true."

 

Logan frowned for just a second before smiling again, the kind of smile that made me melt all the way into my shoes. Stop it, I willed without saying anything out loud. At this rate he was going to woo me right back into his bed without talking about anything at all, and that wouldn't do.

 

"I'd like to talk about last night," I said.

 

Logan nodded. "Let's do it over dinner."

 

I shook my head. "You're not going to get me like that again. Did you think I was just going to have dinner with you, a repeat of last night without us fixing this?"

 

He shook his head. "I would love to have a repeat of last night, but I really just want to spend time with you." His face was open and sincere, none of the arrogance and charm I knew he could use on me. I would accept it.

 

"If you want to spend time with me you're going to have to come to the library. I have to go back. I have the evening shift tonight."

 

Logan nodded. "I'll follow you there. I have nowhere else to go after this and those books need to be returned." He cocked half a smile. "Before I get a fine."

 

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help smiling. "Let me call a cab. You can follow me there."

 

He nodded and walked to his bike while I dialed a car to come pick me up.

 

He waited with me, sitting on his bike. The others all said their goodbyes with claps on his shoulder and manly handshakes and drove off with a roar. I frowned, looking after them.

 

"You didn't introduce me to them."

 

He looked at me, grinning. "I didn't think you wanted to be introduced to them. I thought you wanted to talk about where we stand first."

 

I shook my head, irritated. He was right, I was falling around a little bit, but if the same thing happened and it was me and Joanne I would have introduced her to him and vice versa.

 

"I'll introduce you to them when the time is right, but the boys are all a little rough around the edges. Just give it time."

 

I shrugged. I wasn't sure what that meant but the fact that he was asking for time in our relationship - or whatever it was - made me feel like we were on the same page about something, at least. We were going to give it time and see how it went. That was what I got out of it and it made me happy.

 

The car pulled up and I got in. I waved at Logan through the window and gave the driver the library address. When we pulled off I heard the growl of Logan's motorbike behind us. I looked out the window at the passing scenery. My life had been drab and dull for so long, this adventure with Logan in the picture was a thrill. I was still skeptical and unsure about him, but this was already a hell of a lot better than what I'd had before. I'd had some guys in my life but most of those relationships had either been awkward or very one-sided. Whatever this was with Logan - given that what happened last night had just been a mistake - was already so much better than before.

 

At some point along the way I realized I didn't hear the motorbike anymore. I looked over my shoulder out of the back window. He wasn't behind us and he wasn't a number of cars back, either. I thought about the call before we'd gone to the restaurant and the fact that he'd asked me to meet him there. That, combined with the message he'd gotten and my theory that he might have been with someone else before he met me surfaced again and I was suddenly pissed all over again.

 

Who the hell did he think he was? He asked me to meet him on my time, but I couldn't ask the same with him. He told me to come and when he did I had to come as if I was summoned, but in return he did whatever he wanted and he kept me waiting until after he was done with whatever he felt like doing.

 

This was bullshit. Why the hell did I always end up with losers? Did I have some kind of sign on my back asking people to take advantage of me and discard my feelings as a human being?

 

I huffed, folding my arms over my chest and glaring at any pedestrian we passed. There was no way I was going to be give Logan the time of day anymore. He was going to bring to books to the library tonight - after he was done with whatever he was so busy doing he couldn't accompany me to the library like he'd said he would - and then I was going to treat him like any other customer and not someone more than that, something special. I definitely wasn't going to treat him like the person I thought he could be in my life.

 

No, no one messed with Selena that way. I was pissed off and tired of being messed around. I was good at being alone. I had books and writing and the few people I dared call friends. I didn't need some asshole to fill in the gaps only to break my heart later. Or sooner, given how quickly I fell for Logan.

 

Of course, my falling for him had just been because of his charm. Maybe it had felt like some kind of feat to win him over, take him away from Alicia. I had just been fooling myself, obviously. The only person playing this game the right way was Logan. The rest of us were being played and he got away with it with a cocky grin and drowning deep eyes that made me forget about all my resolutions when it came down to it.

 

The car pulled up in front of the library and I paid the driver. I got out and walked up the steps. A new lady was behind the counter and she smiled at me when I walked in.

 

"You're just on time," she said and hurried out the door.

 

Well, that was my shift, then. Another lonely night where I was going to have way too much time on my hands to think about the son of a bitch that had the nerve to mess me around.

 

Logan. What an appropriate name.