Selena

 

I felt like I was drunk. Everything was surreal. Everything was perfect. Everything was like a dream and I was like a dream and I was scared at some point I was going to wake up.

 

I was starting to fall in love with Logan. He was everything a girl could ever want. A badass who would be good just for her. A biker who was sexy as hell and knew just how to charm the pants of a woman. A man who was fucking good in bed. Or on table. Or on beach.

 

But he was also kind and caring and he had such a terrible past it was difficult to see how he'd turned out so well. I had a lot of respect for him. A lot of respect, and growing affection.

 

We stood side by side on the beach after we'd had sex. I was dying for a shower but I didn't want this moment to end in case, for some reason, there wouldn't be another one. I needed there to be more of this. I wanted Logan in my life. He kept reappearing and I liked it.

 

He took my hand and his hands were large and warm and capable. I knew exactly how good he was with them, but when he held my hand now there was nothing about sex. I felt protected with him. I felt like he might fight for me if it came down to it, whether it was physically or emotionally.

 

"We have to head back," he said. "It's getting late and I need to check in with my boys."

 

I nodded. I knew the moment would eventually come to an end. Hand in hand we walked back the way we'd come. When we got to the bike, the tires were both flat. Logan swore under his breath and kneeled down, inspecting them.

 

"May."

 

"What?"

 

He shook his head like he'd spoken his mind out loud. "Someone slashed my tires."

 

"Who is she?"

 

Logan looked at me, suspicious. "You know about her?"

 

I shook my head. "I've seen the name." I explained to him what had happened at the library, what she'd said and how crazy she'd sounded.

 

"Her comment about hunting season made me think maybe she knew you. It was too weird not to be related and I am involved with you..."

 

Logan got up, interlinked his fingers behind his head and walked away stretched out like that for a moment. When he turned and looked at me again his eyes were very serious. "She's an ex-girlfriend. We dated for quite some time but she's crazy and it didn't work out. She didn't agree with what the gang was becoming, what I was becoming. She disappeared off the scene but the day before our first date she came out of nowhere. I think she's causing trouble with the boys somehow."

 

I nodded. That sounded about right with what I'd seen of her. She was really pretty but looks on the outside meant nothing when you were rotten on the inside.

 

"When I broke up with her she threatened to take down the Fallen Thorns. I hadn't thought much of it then - she was a woman scorned - but I believe now she might be crazy enough to actually do something."

 

"Was she the woman who sent you that message?" I asked, thinking back to that night.

 

Logan nodded. "I was going to explain."

 

"I know." I understood it now. I really had overreacted, Joanne had been right. Logan had been faithful and honest from the start and I'd been quick to believe the worst of him. I was going to apologize for that at some point. It didn't seem like the time, now. "Will she be able to destroy you?" I asked.

 

Logan shrugged and it made me think he wasn't entirely convinced it was impossible. If he thought an ex-girlfriend had the ability to do that, she must have been a lot worse than he was letting it come across. "We received a threat at the club a short while ago, saying our time is up. I made the boys go out in pairs or groups and check in with each other to make sure everyone is fine. I've arranged for us to start meeting somewhere else, too, just in case."

 

"But you think it will still go wrong?"

 

He didn't nod but he looked at me for long enough that I thought maybe he really was nervous for their safety.

 

"What are you going to do?" I asked.

 

"Whatever it takes." He looked at me and his eyes were so dark and ominous for a moment it was scary. I knew he had the ability to do something just as insane. I didn't want him to get into trouble. "There's something I want you to understand," he said and he was so grave I sat up and listened. It wasn't every day Logan looked this serious about something. "We all turned our lives around because living on the wrong side of the law is no life. I won't just do something to screw that up, and definitely not to mess up what we have between us now." He paused for a moment. "But I will do anything, anything if it means keeping my boys safe. They're like my family, my blood, and I'm responsible for each and every one of them. I won't lose a life even if it kills me."

 

He said that and I believed him. I had goosebumps on my skin. I could feel his passion when he spoke. Some people used the phrase 'even if it kills me' as a metaphor but I knew Logan was serious. If it came down to it he would die for those men. It was noble and honorable and all that is good.

 

It terrified me.

 

The fact that May had been at the library made me think she was stalking Logan or me or both. I'd never seen her there before. Of course, when she'd signed up for the computer lab I hadn't really cared about the fact that she was unfamiliar. New people came into town all the time. It got weird when they'd been in town for a very long time and had never set foot in the library until my relationship with Logan had started. Coincidence? Probably not.

 

"What happens now if I go back to work?" I asked. I didn't want to sound like I was scared out of my mind, but the truth was I was nervous. If she'd threatened to take down the Thorns and I was dating the guy she had such a grudge against, I wasn't sure if I could feel safe. I knew I was probably being a little overboard about this, but it was a fear and I was going to voice it, even if it was just for Logan to tell me I was being silly and I didn't need to worry.

 

"I would prefer if you didn't go back to work."

 

My stomach turned when he said that. "Am I in danger?"

 

He hesitated before he shook his head. Somehow I didn't believe him.

 

"Do you have any vacation days?"

 

I nodded, unsure what that had to do with anything. Logan nodded as if confirming something to himself. "I would like you to take them, as many as you have."

 

He dialed on his phone and held it to his ear, speaking before I could ask him why. I felt like it was more than enough of an answer to my question about being in danger so I did the most logical thing to do in this situation. I trusted him.

 

I found my own phone and dialed Alicia's number. I wasn't exactly in her good books but maybe a couple of days away from each other wouldn't be a bad thing. I waited for the phone to ring and it rang for so long I thought it would roll over into voicemail. She picked up on one of the very last rings, though.

 

"I have a uh..." I glanced at Logan. What was I going to say to her? "Family emergency. I need to take a couple of personal days, if that's okay with you."

 

"This really isn't the best timing, Selena." Her voice was sharp like she was scolding me. I could imagine what her face looked like.

 

I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "I realize this, and if I could help it I would. These things always happen at the worst of times, don't they?" It was a rhetorical question and I was hoping she would take it and run with it. I wasn't sure how to carry on if she said no. I would have to fight with her and I didn't exactly enjoy conflict.

 

She sighed. " I suppose they don't. How long do you need?"

 

I glanced at Logan who was talking into his phone with a very serious tone. "Will a week be too much to ask?"

 

She hesitated for long enough for me to wonder if she was going to tell me I was out of my mind asking so much. I'd never taken any leave, I was sure I had a lot more than a week to my name, but all in one go a week was quite a lot.

 

"Sure. Do what you need to do. But when you come back I expect a change."

 

I nodded again. She still couldn't see me. "Of course. Thank you, Alicia."

 

She hung up without saying goodbye. I looked at my phone and then at Logan who had already finished up his conversation.

 

"And?"

 

He looked very serious, more serious than I'd ever seen him before. It was thrilling to see him this in charge of everything, and at the same time it was nerve wrecking because I knew there was a reason for it. And there had been a situation like this at least once before if he knew how to handle himself with this much calm. He wasn't freaking out at all.

 

"I got a week."

 

He smiled and pulled me closer, kissing me on the head. "That's my girl." Usually when men said that to me it irritated me. It always felt condescending. The way Logan said it made me feel like he was impressed with me, and I guess the words rang true. I was his girl, wasn't I?

 

"What are we doing about these tires?" I asked. A bike didn't exactly have a spare, and even if it did a spare tire only catered for one wheel at a time. Two was pushing it, and seeing that two was all we had...

 

"Saul will be here in about five minutes."

 

Saul. The guy Logan was so close with. He'd been at the Girls and Boys Club, I knew, but I hadn't formally met any of them. I was suddenly a little nervous. I was about to meet one of the most important people in Logan's life. What if he didn't like me? What if his opinion mattered?

 

It wasn't five minutes before a car turned onto the concrete square where we were. It had a trailer behind him with another bike. Picking us up apparently wasn't enough; it had to be in style.

 

One of the bikers from the Boys and Girls Club hopped off and he and Logan shook hands.

 

"Thanks for pulling through."

 

"No sweat, man."

 

He looked at me, nodding. "Saul."

 

"Selena."

 

He nodded again. Either he knew, or he assumed so. He looked at the bike and whistled through his teeth. "May?" He asked it like he was sure of the answer.

 

Logan didn't answer but it was pretty decided between them. Logan turned to me. "I want you to go with Saul. He'll make sure you get home safe. I want you to pack a bag for a week and wait for my call. I'm taking you away for a little while."

 

"Where are we going?"

 

He smiled and a little bit of the usual Logan showed through all the tension and seriousness. "It's a surprise."

 

I tried to smile but I was starting to get nervous. Talking about gang violence, or even writing it, wasn't nearly as intense as living it. I was a writer. I lived vicariously through my characters. As much fun as this adventure was, real life was scary.

 

"I'll take good care of her," Saul said, looking at Logan with eyes that made a promise without him having to say anything.

 

"I know you will."

 

Saul took a step back and Logan closed in, wrapping me up in his arms and kissing me properly. When he let me go I was dizzy. "I'll call you soon, okay? Be safe."

 

Logan and Saul unloaded the bike and then Logan set off to take care of business. Saul got into the car and I got into the passenger side.