CHAPTER 3
Dear Levi, have I ever mentioned how much I want to kiss you? How much I want to taste you? How much I want to tangle my tongue around yours and breathe you in?
Winnie Cuthbert--tom-boy, fitness nut, baker extraordinaire and long time best friend--stared at Natalie in unattractive bug-eyed wonder. Icing dripped unnoticed from the pastry bag in her hand, dropping a blob into the middle of a pretty pink rose.
“How could you not tell me about this?” she asked breathlessly. “You wrote sexy letters? To Levi? I-- I--” Smiling, she gestured wordlessly and shook her head. “I’m--“
“--shocked, I know,” Natalie supplied, popping another petite four into her mouth. There were times she could scarcely believe it as well.
Winnie’s Bakery was the best in town and she’d mastered the almond-icing-to-cake ratio to absolute perfection. If heaven had a flavor, it would taste like one of Winnie’s petite fours, Natalie thought, groaning with pleasure. She licked her finger and enjoyed her friend’s stunned reaction. She’d been so busy building her business and becoming a responsible civic-minded adult it had been awhile since she’d shocked anybody. She’d forgotten how much she liked it.
Furthermore, the fact that she could shock Winnie, who’d been her friend since grade school and who’d been privy to each and every one of her secrets since--with this exception of this one--was quite a coup. She and Winnie had shared lunches, shared crushes, shared heartbreak and shared more phone time than was probably physically healthy, Natalie thought with an inward smile. But she couldn’t imagine her life without Winnie.
They had different tastes in music, men and a host of other things, but that would never change the fact that Natalie loved her dearly. Theoretically, were Natalie ever to snap and kill someone--there’d been a few times she’d almost launched herself across the board table at a city council meeting--Winnie would be the person she’d call to help her hide the body. It was an unlikely scenario, but the fact remained that she knew Winnie would always have her back.
“So just how sexy were these letters?” Winnie asked, seemingly still gobsmacked. Her light-blue eyes twinkled with undisguised interest. “R-rated?”
Natalie winced and shook her head.
Winnie’s eyes rounded and she leaned forward and lowered her voice despite the fact that the bakery was empty at the moment, a rare occasion. “X? You’re telling me you wrote X-rated letters to Levi?”
“I told you they were graphic,” Natalie reminded her. She slipped behind the counter and helped herself to a glass of peach tea. “And, until Lacey thoughtfully put the return address stamp on my out-going mail and added the letter to the promo stuff, they were all anonymous.” Her cheeks puffed as she expelled a fatalistic breath. “But not anymore.”
Winnie set the icing bag aside and dusted her hands on her lavender apron. “Maybe he won’t be able to get his mail while he’s home.”
“He’ll make sure that it’s forwarded. Adam told me that Levi’s stuck on finding out exactly who the letter writer is.” She felt a smile roll around her lips. “He’s calling me The Mysterious Ms. X.”
Winnie’s lips twitched. “It has a certain cache.”
Natalie harrumphed. “It’s a disaster in the making and you know it. I’ve got to get that letter back before he sees it.”
“I wouldn’t call it a disaster, per se,” Winnie countered thoughtfully. Her messy black curls stirred beneath the ceiling fan circling overhead. “More like an opportunity I would think.”
Natalie blinked. “Opportunity? As in opportunity for me to be humiliated beyond words?” Even thinking about the impending moment of truth made a ball of dread the size of a coconut form in the pit of her unceasingly churning belly.
“No,” she said. “An opportunity for you to stop writing him your fantasies and live them out in the flesh.”
She abruptly pushed away from the counter, grabbing Winnie’s toned arm in the process to propel her toward the door. “Okay, let’s go.”
“Go where?”
“To rehab. You’ve obviously started smoking crack.”
Winnie chuckled and dug in her heels. “Natalie, come on. You had to know when you started writing him the letters that he might possibly discover your identity.”
Natalie rolled her eyes and shot her friend an incredulous look. “You know damn well I don’t ever think that far ahead.” She rubbed her temples. “I just-- I just started writing him and he kept writing me back and, and...” it was the closest thing to a relationship she’d ever had or would have with him.
And that was it, Natalie realized. Finding her out would be mortifying as hell, but it was knowing that this unique connection would soon be broken that upset her the most. She’d rather have this fantasy relationship with him than nothing at all.
It was official. She was pathetic.
Winnie made a sympathetic moue of regret. “And you don’t want it to end?”
“Exactly.” She swallowed, trying to make sense of her own feelings. “When he finds out who I am, it’s over, you know? No more letters. No more sharing fantasies or dreams or...anything.” She’d learned so much about him over the past few months, things she’d never imagined that he would confide in her. “It’ll be awkward and weird and things will never be the same.”
“Does Adam know?”
Natalie chuckled darkly. “Er...no. I confide a lot in Adam, but telling him that his brother makes me find new and ingenious uses for my massaging showerhead isn’t one of them.”
“Natalie.”
Smiling, she shrugged with unrepentant humor. “I’m just sayin’.” She paused. “You still haven’t been by to see him?”
Her friend winced and a flash of pain and regret darkened her blue gaze. “I... I can’t yet. I will,” she insisted.
Winnie had carried a torch for Adam for almost as long as Natalie had for Levi. To date, though they’d been friends and competitors--they were constantly one-upping each other when it came to sports, a fact that had bordered on the obsessive and always provided ample entertainment--Adam had never shown any romantic interest in Winnie. Like her, Winnie had dated a few guys off and on throughout high school and college, but had never settled in for what one would call a long and meaningful relationship.
Probably because Adam held a key ingredient to any successful pairing--her heart. Those McPherson boys had a way of unwittingly rendering every other guy insignificant. If the rumors were true, she’d been nicknamed Just-Say-No-Natalie because she routinely refused anything remotely resembling a date. What was the point, really? She’d tried to move on in college, had even given her virginity away in the process, and for what? In the end, there was only one guy for her. Her gaze slid to her friend.
And she grimly suspected the same was true of Winnie.
Natalie smiled softly at her friend. “You need to go see him.”
A wobbly grin formed on her lips. “I know that, Natalie. I’m just not so sure that I won’t cry. And he doesn’t need that, you know? He’d resent me for it.”
Adam definitely didn’t want to be pitied. Natalie had done all of her crying for his injury before he got back into Bethel Bay, and the only tears she’d shown him since were tears of joy for his homecoming. Winnie was right. Adam was damned intuitive and wouldn’t appreciate her pity. Especially from Winnie, who’d always challenged him.
But he would appreciate her petite fours.
“Take him a box of your goodies,” she suggested. “If you think you’re going to cry, then tell him you’ve got to make another delivery.”
“I might.”
She took her by the shoulders. “Do.”
“How do you think he’s going to feel about the letters you’ve written to Levi?”
Natalie made a moue of regret. “You mean other than ragging me mercilessly about it for the rest of our natural lives? He’ll be fine. Actually...I think he already suspects me.”
“Really? What makes you think that?”
She grimaced. “Because I am a moron and he’s rather observant.”
Winnie shook her head. “Er...afraid I’m not following.”
“He noticed that my letters to him and the Mysterious Ms. X’s letters to Levi were arriving on the same day.”
She gasped and her eyes rounded in outrage. “You mean you mailed them at the same time?”
“I was being efficient,” Natalie defended, nevertheless disgusted with herself. “We both know I’m incapable of being otherwise.” It was no small part of the reason she was such a good council member. She was one of those rare people who was neither right-brained nor left. She was equally strong on both lobes, which made her a bit of an oddball when it came to being an artist. Many artistic types were scatterbrained and disorganized. Not her. Even her studio was methodically categorized.
Sort of like Winnie, Natalie thought. Given her friend’s penchant for sports--softball and running, in particular--the fact that she owned a bakery and was able to make little bits of edible heaven was completely at odds with her tom-boy nature. Winnie was equally happy being covered with dirt or covered in icing. It was part of her charm, Natalie thought, glancing around the bakery, admiring her friend’s handiwork.
The inside of the bakery itself looked good enough to eat. Varying shades of lavender accented with silver filigree decorated the walls and black and white tiles lay in a harlequin pattern against the floor. Fresh flowers and whimsical accents rounded out the quirky décor. Huge picture windows framed Bethel Bay proper and her heart inexplicably swelled with pride as she looked out onto the quaint cobble-stoned streets.
Hanging baskets bursting with colorful blooms hung from black wrought-iron lamp posts and the sidewalks were full of barrel-shaped planters. Begonias and marigolds marched in little regimented rows along flower beds at every street corner and the scent of the ocean wafted in on the constant breeze. Bethel Bay was an old town and had managed to grow with the times without sacrificing her heritage.
Thanks to a city council--one that she was proud to be part of--dedicated to preserving their little burg, prime real estate still remained in the downtown area rather than being spread out along the new highway. By offering various tax incentives designed to encourage new business to open in the older renovated buildings, the “little man” wasn’t being squeezed out by the big box and chain stores and created a wonderful atmosphere for residents and vacationers alike. Slate-shingled roofs, stained glass and copper fixtures were the prominent architectural influences, creating a warm, picturesque mood along the square.
Natalie loved her little town. She’d grown up walking these streets--getting salt water taffy from the local candy store, buying her school supplies at the Five and Dime, her Prom dress from Waterstone’s Formals on the corner. She’d spent her summers on the beach, combing for driftwood, building bonfires and having clam bakes. She smiled. Her winter’s doing much of the same. This little town had shaped her life, had influenced her art. She’d built her business here and no one was more proud of her than her “local” family.
Home, Natalie thought. Just another reason to add to a list of many why ultimately things could never work out between her and Levi. She was invested here. Her father, her business, her very way of life.
He was not.
Levi McPherson was a soldier first and foremost and she couldn’t picture him ever returning to Bethel Bay on a permanent basis. And since she would never leave...well, having the “letter relationship” was the only one that would have ever worked.
And the minute his forwarded mail caught up to him it would be over. She let go a sigh that felt dredged up from the very bottom of her heart-sick soul.
“So what are you going to do?” Winnie asked.
“What any right-thinking, successful, mature woman of twenty-seven would do, of course,” she said matter-of-factly.
“Tell him? Get the jump on him? Take the bull by the horns, so to speak?”
Natalie looked at her friend as though she’d lost her mind, then snagged another petite four for the road and headed toward the door. She needed to drop by the studio. “Hell, no.” She smiled over her shoulder. “I’m going to avoid him. At least until I can find a way to get my hands on that letter before he does.”
As a matter of fact, the letter getting routed through here first might actually give her the advantage she needed. A miniscule hope, but she’d take it where she could get it.
* * *
“Levi McPherson, as I live and breathe.”
“Hey, Tracy,” he said, leaning casually against the counter. He’d waited for a lull at the post office, but knew it wouldn’t last. He needed to act fast, but imagined he’d have to go through the requisite chit-chat first. “How’s it going?”
Short and a little heavier than he remembered, Tracy beamed at him. “Great. God, it’s good to see you.” A shadow moved over her face. “Sorry to hear about Adam, though. I hope he’s doing okay.”
Levi nodded, accepting her sympathy. “Thanks. But you know Adam. He’ll be fine. We’re just thankful that it wasn’t any worse.” Understatement of the year. They were eternally thankful he’d only lost part of his leg, rather than his life. Now the only thing that remained to be seen was whether or not he could reclaim his former way of life.
She tossed a box into the bin behind her. “You on leave?”
“Just for a few days. I’ve had my mail forwarded to my parent’s while I’m home, but wondered if you wouldn’t mind holding it for me here instead? I’ll come by regularly.”
She gave him an odd look, as though she didn’t quite see the point of forwarding mail for such a small amount of time. “You don’t want a box?”
Slightly embarrassed, Levi shook his head. “For no longer than I’d need it, it’s sort of a waste.”
She nodded knowingly. “You’re right. I don’t mind holding it for you at all. They’re usually finished sorting by nine every morning. I’ll keep it up here for you.”
“Thanks. I appreciate it.” He hesitated, looked away then found her gaze once more. “Look, this is a bit awkward, but I wondered if you could do me a favor.”
“I will if I can. What do you need?”
He smiled and passed a hand over his face. “I need to know who owns box 270.”
Undisguised interest sparked in her eyes, but she ultimately frowned and shook her head. “Sorry, Levi. I can’t tell you that. It’s illegal.”
Damn, he thought, as disappointment knifed through him. He’d thought as much, but it was worth a shot. He pushed away from the counter and smiled at her. “No problem. I knew it was a long shot.”
A sly grin slid over her lips. “Any particular reason you want to know who owns box 270?”
“Idle curiosity, that’s all.”
She hummed under her breath, clearly not convinced.
Levi grinned at her and, shaking his head, made his way to the door. “Thanks, Tracy. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Hey, Levi?”
He turned.
“I can tell you that the owner of box 270 typically checks mail in the afternoon, around four’ish, I think,” she added speculatively.
Hot damn. It was a start. He smiled gratefully and nodded. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon instead. And...thanks.”
“Anytime.”
Feeling marginally better now that a plan was in place, Levi pushed out onto the sidewalk and inhaled the unmistakable scent of home. Salty air and magnolias, pine mulch and seafood. The hot July sun was sinking midway through the sky, casting shadows along the bricked sidewalk. He looked one way and then the other, trying to choose his path when he noticed Natalie’s sign--wrought iron and suspended from a huge piece of driftwood--hanging from her storefront just a few doors down.
Path chosen, he thought, as his feet instantly took the direction that would lead him to her door. A bell tinkled overhead, heralding his presence and, though he could hear voices in the back, no one came forward. Just as well, because he wanted to take an uninterrupted look around.
He whistled low, impressed. Life-sized animals in various poses stood on pedestals stationed around the room. Horses--a mare and her colt--dolphins, otters, cats and dogs, even a wolf. Aside from being hauntingly beautiful, each piece had a...soul for lack of a better explanation. It was as though she’d seen each of these animals and made their driftwood counterpart.
Utterly amazing.
In addition to the larger pieces of art, shelves were full of other creations. Earrings, pendants, bowls, wind-chimes fashioned with sea glass. He carefully picked up a rabbit, inspecting how she’d put it together. Each piece of wood fit perfectly, creating the ideal line for each part.
Honestly, he’d known she was talented, had even admired the heart she’d fashioned for his parents for their fortieth wedding anniversary, but he’d had no idea, no real appreciation for the scope of her talent. No wonder she--
“Dad, this is crazy. You have to go,” Natalie said, emerging from the back room. “Uncle Milton needs your help. It’s a week, not the end of the world. I’ve got plenty here to keep me busy. I can wait until you get home to go combing.”
John Rowland ambled into view. “I know you can, girl. But we both know you won’t. Stubborn,” he muttered. “Just like your mother.”
Unwilling to let the conversation continue without making his presence known, Levi cleared his throat.
Natalie’s dark brown eyes quickly found his and the impact of those coffee-colored orbs made his legs go a bit weak. Desire, hot and fierce, bolted through him, sending a current of heat straight to his loins.
Little brother’s best friend, he reminded himself. Inappropriate. Out of bounds. Since the Sabrina incident the only kind of woman he dallied with was the temporary kind, and Natalie Rowland--hot and tempting as she may be--definitely wasn’t the type for the fleeting affair he typically enjoyed. And those were few and far between.
Furthermore, he preferred having all of his body parts accounted for and in working order--specifically his balls--and knew his brother, who was well acquainted with his sporadic dating habits, would castrate him in a heartbeat for messing around with his friend. Besides, he had things to do.
Like putting a real name in place of Ms. X.
Natalie’s gaze dropped to his mouth, making his lips tingle in response. His gut clenched and his balls hardened in his briefs.
Bad, bad idea.
Interestingly, he could have sworn that he saw the same flash of awareness and the same conclusion mirrored in her gaze as well. He frowned slightly, studying her.
“Levi,” she said, a little too cheerfully. “What brings you here?”
“You, of course. I wanted to see what you’ve been up to.” He nodded at the mare. “Impressive stuff. It’s beautiful.”
She wandered over, crossed her arms over her chest, inadvertently pushing her breasts tighter against her shirt, and sighed. “Thank you,” she murmured softly, seemingly embarrassed by his praise. For reasons which escaped his immediate understanding, he found this utterly adorable.
“How long does it take you to do something like this?”
She shrugged. “It depends. If all the pieces are there, I’ve been known to work without sleep for a couple of days to finish something.”
“She pushes herself too hard,” her father piped up.
“Dad,” she said warningly.
“That’s another reason I’m not going to Milton’s.”
Intrigued, Levi arched a questioning brow.
Natalie released an exasperated sigh and leaned closer to him. He caught her scent and felt another inappropriate surge of lust. “Uncle Milton has to have surgery on his foot. He’s not going to be able to get around for a week or so, and he’s asked Dad to come up and stay with him.” She jerked her head in her father’s direction and lowered her voice. “Hardhead over there doesn’t want to go.”
“Because he doesn’t want to leave you?”
A light blush tinged her cheeks and she shrugged, seemingly embarrassed. “Because he doesn’t want me going to the beach alone. Not since Mom--”
Ah, Levi thought, as understanding dawned. He remembered when Natalie’s mom drowned. Terrible stuff. Living in a seaside community there were accidents every year, but Molly Rowland was a born and bred Bethel Bay girl who’d been an Olympic hopeful on her college swim team. Her death had rattled the community to its core and had left Natalie and her father devastated when she’d passed away.
She cleared her throat and toed the carpet absently with her sandal. “Anyway, it’s ridiculous. I’m an adult. I know how to swim, and it’s not like I’m going into the ocean anyway, you know? Just along with water’s edge.”
He could see her point, but also understood John’s anxiety, irrational as it may be. He watched him from across the store, noted the worry lines around his drawn mouth, the crease of concern written across his forehead.
“I’ll go with you,” Levi said, surprising himself.
Natalie blinked, startled. “What?”
“I’ll go combing with you so that you’re not alone.” He gestured toward her father. “Do you think that would work for John?”
A flash of unreadable emotion--fear, maybe?--lit her gaze, but she blinked it away before he could form a proper opinion. “You don’t have to do that, Levi,” she said, her voice strangely high-pitched and shaky. “You need to spend time with your family.”
If he didn’t know any better he’d think she was purposely trying to avoid him, which didn’t make any sense. Natalie had always seemed comfortable in his company. Had something changed? he wondered, studying her closely.
“I’ll have plenty of time with my family,” he said, suddenly determined to help her whether she wanted him to or not. Irrational, he knew, but he couldn’t seem to help himself. He wanted to be with her. Needed to, which didn’t make any sense whatsoever. “I love to walk along the beach. I’ve missed the ocean.” He passed a hand over his face. “I’ve missed home.”
“Really?” She sounded annoyingly surprised.
His gaze swung to hers. “Yeah, I love Bethel Bay.” He rocked by on his heels and chuckled softly. “Could I live here permanently? No. I’d go stir crazy, but it’ll always be home.”
And it was the truth. That was part of the draw of the military life. He’d loved being an Army brat as a kid growing up, and enjoyed the lifestyle even more as an adult. He’d traveled all over the world, had been stationed in all four corners of the globe at one point or another, and had loved every minute of it. He thrived on learning about new cultures and hell...just breathing different air. Though he knew he would eventually retire here--much like his father had and Adam planned to do--that was years from now. And even after he retired, he knew he’d still want to travel.
He paused to look at her. “What about you? Ever thought about moving away from here? Living somewhere else?”
She grinned, almost sadly, which seemed very odd to him, and she let go a small, almost imperceptible sigh. “Not once.”
Unsure of what to make of her, Levi merely smiled. “You don’t know what you’re missing.”
That coffee-colored gaze tangled with his, making his chest grown inexplicably tight and an unmistakable arc of awareness passed between them. “The same could be said for you.”
“Where’s the phone book?” John called out, pilfering through drawers behind the counter, thankfully interrupting the strange moment. “Surely there’s some sort of hospice care Milton could use. I don’t have time to...“
Natalie heaved another exasperated breath and shot him a look. “You’re sure you don’t mind?”
“I wouldn’t have offered if I did.”
As a matter of fact, he was looking forward to it. More so than he should, if he were completely honest with himself. He didn’t know what exactly had prompted the offer, but it felt...right. It felt strangely necessary. Levi inwardly grimaced as another thought struck.
No doubt Adam would be only too happy to tell him how wrong it was.