I keep waiting for the bottom to drop out from beneath me. Week after week I’m with Tyler and Torin, I grow more and more comfortable. But the anxiety that lies below the surface is ever-present. If I didn’t hate Dr. Cohen so much, I’d call and ask for some anxiety meds. It’s as though my stomach has rocks in it. Heavy and a constant reminder. I’m jumpy and worry all the time.
Why?
Because I like it here. I like it more than I should. For once, I’ve settled somewhere. With the Kline brothers, I’m not afraid they want to come into my room at night and force me to do things I don’t want to do. I’m not afraid they won’t feed me or will steal my things. I’m not afraid they’ll backhand me or yank me up by my arms when they’re angry.
I’m simply comfortable.
Which makes me really uncomfortable.
“Five boxes? Really?” Tyler teases. “They’re not that good, princess.”
I shake out of my daze to realize I’ve swiped all five boxes of cosmic brownies from the shelf. At hearing the new nickname, he likes to tease me with, I relax. It’s strange because I do feel like a princess. I’m continually pampered and treated as though I’m someone of value. As if I’m truly wanted and a part of something.
Tyler never gets annoyed by the things I say or my constant fidgeting. He never says anything cruel or ridiculing. I’m just taken care of without anything other than my company wanted in return.
It’s weird.
Like super weird.
But I’ve seen weirder things in my life.
“They are that good,” I argue.
“Better than that chocolate chip pecan pie you plan on dazzling us with tomorrow?” he challenges, a smirk on his handsome face.
I roll my eyes and flip him off. “This is to hold me over until then.”
His phone rings and he answers by the second ring. When his smile drops and he scowls, unease crawls up my spine. “I see. I’ll be there before then.” He hangs up and starts pushing the cart down the aisle. “We need to leave.”
The sudden change of his mood has me on guard. I don’t say a word as we quickly check out and throw only half the items we managed to get from our list into his trunk. It isn’t until we’re driving that he lets out a heavy sigh.
“I have to take you back to your foster home.”
My heart flops in my chest. “W-What? Why?” I hate that tears have sprung in my eyes and my voice is shaking. “I don’t want to go back.”
He takes my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze. “Your caseworker wanted to check on you before Thanksgiving. She called Guy and will be there soon.”
A hot tear rolls down my cheek and I hastily swipe it away with the back of my hand. “How long do I have to stay?”
“I’ll wait down the street and as soon as she leaves, you can go back home with us,” he assures me.
Home.
I swallow down my emotion and nod. The drive is quiet and when we arrive, Lola’s car is already there. Tyler pulls up several houses away and regards me with a grim stare.
“I’m sorry. I wish we didn’t have to do this but…” he trails off and guilt flashes in his brown eyes.
“I know. I get it.”
I push my car door open. The wind slides inside like some living, breathing hateful animal and rattles me to my core. I shudder—for so many reasons—as I start to pull away from Tyler’s grip to go meet my fate. As though he doesn’t want to let go, his grip tightens and he pulls my hand to his mouth. His breath is hot as he presses a chaste kiss to my flesh before letting me go altogether.
A flash of heat trembles through me and I gape at him in shock. The small kiss was intimate. Possessive. A promise.
A promise of what?
“I’ll be right here waiting.”
“What about the cold stuff in the trunk?” I challenge, trying to make light of a situation that’s about to make me cry.
“That stuff doesn’t matter.” His eyes bore into mine. “You matter.”
Jerking my head away from his penetrating gaze, I slam the door shut and run down the sidewalk toward Guy’s crummy house. After living for several weeks in a castle, I’m headed to a dungeon. The foster system has always been a prison to me. Tyler and Torin’s house, despite the lack of windows, was more freedom than I’d ever experienced in my life.
I clomp up the steps and push through the front door, trying my damnedest to look natural. To pretend I haven’t been living with two men Guy accepted a cash bribe from.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Guy says, his voice tight. “Where’ve you been, kiddo?” He flashes me a stern look that reminds me we don’t talk about our unspoken secret.
I give him a quick nod and smile. “Just taking a walk.”
Lola straightens her back and scrutinizes me with narrowed eyes. Her sleek brown hair has recently been cut into a cute bob that does wonders for her age. The normally dull look in her green eyes has brightened. She looks happy. When I see the fancy diamond on her ring finger, I know exactly why. Lola is in love.
“Hello, Casey,” she says in her soothing, motherly voice. At one time, a few years ago, I begged her to adopt me. Not one of my finer moments. It was embarrassing and incredibly awkward when she explained that she couldn’t.
“Hey, Lola.”
“A little cold for a walk, honey.” She smiles at me, but it’s one of those I-know-you’re-bullshitting-me-kid smiles.
“You caught me,” I say with a laugh. “I walked to a friend’s house and we were watching a movie.”
Lola’s stiff frame relaxes. “How are you doing?”
“Fine.”
Used to my clipped answers, she continues. “Wonderful. You’re about a month from turning eighteen. There’s some paperwork we will need to go over, so plan to see me the week before Christmas. I’ve located some women’s homes for you to consider staying in. Also, I’ve compiled a list of employment agencies to help you find a job—”
“I have a job,” I blurt out. As soon as the words tumble from my lips and Guy flashes me a warning glare, I shrink backward into the wall, wishing I could disappear altogether.
Lola stands and walks my way. She has this way about her. She sniffs out problems. As a caseworker, it’s probably a good thing because she’s gotten me pulled from a couple of homes that weren’t treating me right. I never had to mention it. She just knew.
But now…
I don’t want her to know.
She’ll ruin everything.
“I wanted to invite you to Thanksgiving with me,” she says softly. “My fiancé and I were going to go to the soup kitchen to volunteer.”
I want to brag to her that I’m cooking Thanksgiving this year with Tyler and Torin. That it’ll be the best Thanksgiving ever. That I’ve researched recipes and I’m terribly excited.
“Actually,” Guy interrupts. “She and I were going to cook a feast for the boys and Allie.” His face is red because clearly lying isn’t his strong suit either.
“Yeah. Pecan pie with chocolate chips.” Technically not lying. I’m totally making it.
The skin near the corner of her eyes crinkles as she smiles. Lola is pretty when she smiles, so I can see how she found herself a fiancé. “I see. I’m glad to know you two seem to be getting along. Especially because a little over a month ago, you both weren’t each other’s favorite.”
Guy laughs and pulls me in for a side hug. “She’s a handful, but she keeps things interesting around here.”
Lola frowns at the way he hugs me. I remain stiff and am desperately trying to keep my features schooled.
“Guy, I’d like to chat with Casey for a bit. Can I trouble you for some coffee?” Lola asks.
“Sure,” he grunts and releases me.
The moment he’s gone, her features turn serious as she grabs my hands. “What’s going on? You’re not acting like yourself.” She looks over her shoulder before snapping her gaze to mine. “Has Guy hurt you or…” she trails off, tears swimming in her eyes. “Has he touched you?”
My jaw drops open and I scoff. “Ew, gross. No. Oh my God, Lola. Yuck.”
Relief washes over her features. “Oh, thank goodness. I didn’t want to have to kill him.”
We both laugh because Lola is too nice to do something like that.
“I’m fine. I swear it,” I tell her honestly. “In fact, I’ve never been happier. Ever, Lola. I’m so happy, I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“Why the sudden change? Because you’re no longer in school?”
“School was a drag, but that’s not it.” I decide to offer her a morsel. “It’s my new job.” Not a lie. Tyler said he’d pay me to help him with his business stuff. At first it was super boring, but he’s actually really good at explaining things in a way I understand. It makes me curious about geology and environmental science.
“What sort of job?”
“For now, I’m reading over oil and gas contracts and learning verbiage. I’ve gotten to look a little at some maps and seismic graphs. Did you know drilling too much in an area can cause earthquakes? Oklahoma has been experiencing many lately.”
She blinks at me in surprise. “Oh, Casey, this is wonderful news. Congratulations. I knew you had it in you.”
I straighten my back and lift my chin. Pride surges through me. When Tyler and I are working in his office, it’s like two friends discovering new things. Not exactly work. But now that I’m telling my social worker about it, it’s something to be proud of.
“This is why college is important,” she says in her motherly tone. “If this is an interest of yours, you could learn more technical aspects in college. Please consider applying to some colleges now that you’ve graduated.”
“I’ll think about it.” And for once, I am thinking about it.
She smiles and swipes a strand of hair from my face. “I’m proud of you, Casey Doe.”
I try not to cringe at hearing my last name. “Thanks, Lo.”
“This change in you is a good one. You’ve really matured since I met with you and your school a few weeks ago. I can tell you enjoy this job of yours. Save your paychecks and who knows, maybe soon you’ll have enough for a car.”
I don’t tell her I already have one and that my car cost over a hundred thousand dollars.
Doesn’t seem like the right time.
“See you later,” I say to her.
She leaves without her coffee and soon drives off. Guy reemerges from the kitchen with a mug of coffee in hand.
“I made this crap for no reason,” he grumbles as he sets it down on the coffee table. “Did you say anything to her?”
“Nope. Bye, Dude.” I start to leave, but he rushes over to me, planting his palm on the door.
“Not so fast. We need to talk.” His beady eyes dart back and forth as he looks down at me. A sliver of fear trickles through me.
“Pass, my ride’s waiting.” I put my hands on my hips and indicate with my head that he should let me go.
“I’m going to need more money.” He purses his lips as if he just tasted something sour.
“What? Why? Tyler gave you a giant wad of cash!”
“Shhh,” he grits out, looking over his shoulder. “Keep it down.” He crowds me and his spittle showers down on me. “I need more. Tell him.”
“Or else what?” I challenge.
He hisses at me. “Or else I keep you here and make your life a goddamned nightmare. That prick has the money—you and I both know it. If I’m putting my neck out there, because this shit could get me sent to prison, then I’m going to require more damn cash. Tell him, Casey. Tell him or this game is over.”
With shaking hands, I pull my phone from my hoodie pocket and blink away the tears forming in my eyes. What if Tyler says no? What if he doesn’t want to give Guy any more money? Is that it? Am I done?
Quickly, I text Tyler.
Me: She’s gone. Guy says he wants more money and then he’ll let me go. I’m sorry.
When he doesn’t respond and Guy doesn’t take his hand off the door, I burst into tears. Guy’s shoulders hunch when we both realize Tyler isn’t coming back. I storm off to the bathroom and lock myself inside. Needing to escape, I yank back the shower curtain and sit in the empty tub. My mind whirs with all the fun moments I’ve had with Tyler. I knew I should have savored them more. Nothing good ever lasts for long in my world. I sob as I wonder if they’d find me if I ran away. I’m pretty sure I could find my way back to the castle.
When the tears run dry, I begin incessantly tapping the fiberglass with my ring. A ring I hardly wear, but today I saw it in my drawer and put it on. It’s a ring with no stone. The prongs claw the air in an expectant way as though to say, “Where’s my diamond?” But I like it. I like how it’s empty and imperfect. Plus, the prongs make a satisfying clink each time I tap the tub.
Clink. Clink. Clink.
Tomorrow we were going to cook a family feast.
Now, my tomorrow will be filled with Guy’s annoyed glares and no hope for chocolate chip pecan pie.
Clink. Clink.
I know Tyler will miss me. We have a connection. I just hate that money had to be our deciding factor. Maybe once I turn eighteen, he’ll let me go live there and nothing will hold me back. We’ll work on his oil and gas stuff during the day and watch movies with Torin at night. We’ll cook meals together and go on walks. Maybe it’ll evolve into something romantic. The way he kissed my hand earlier felt…hot.
And hot is a sensation I’m not familiar with.
Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.
I pull up my phone, hoping that maybe I missed his reply. Nothing. And I was correct. It’s been well over an hour since I locked myself in the bathroom. Another ugly sob rips through me. I swallow it down and take to tapping to distract myself.
Clinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclink.
I open a message to Torin. Each day, I grow more and more curious about him. I’ve spied on his emails that he writes back and forth with Tyler each day, but I can’t connect that Torin with the Torin I know. My Torin doesn’t like to make eye contact. My Torin is abrupt. My Torin makes sounds of distress when the movies get too loud. My Torin behaves erratically and doesn’t seem to give me the time of day aside from the trails of pennies he leaves everywhere.
With a heavy heart, I decide to send him my first message. My fingers hesitate over the keys. I don’t know what to say to him. Do I beg him to reason with Tyler? For them to come take me away?
Clinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclinkclink.
The message remains open and empty. God, I don’t even know what to say to him.
Me: Guy wanted more money. I don’t think Tyler wants to pay it. I guess I won’t be coming back. Thank you for the pennies.
When the dots start moving immediately, my heart seizes in my chest.
Torin: Send me the wiring instructions and your location. Money and an Uber are on the way.
I blink at the screen in confusion. It’s like Tyler is messaging me. This isn’t the Torin I see day in and day out. The one who slings his dishes when he’s had enough and disappears into walls when the conversation is one he doesn’t want to participate in.
Me: I don’t know how much he wants.
Torin: It doesn’t matter. We’ll pay it.
I close my eyes and hot tears streak from the corners of my eyes. I’m trying to imagine these words coming from Torin and it doesn’t compute. My phone buzzes again.
Torin: Goddammit, Casey. Send me the information, now.
I’m gaping at my phone when the bathroom door handle starts to jiggle. I’ve barely stuffed it into my pocket, ready to claw out Guy’s eyes, when a different figure looms over me.
“Tyler?” I cry out.
His brown eyes are wild and frantic. The knot on his tie has been pulled loose around his throat. Shadows loom above his cheekbones. “There you are,” he coos as he kneels beside the tub, pulling me against his chest for a hug. “I sorted it out as soon as I could.”
I break down, overcome with emotion, as one of the princes in my world scoops me into his strong arms. I cling desperately to him as he stalks out of the bathroom with me in his grip. Burying my face against his neck, I refuse to look at Guy. From the sounds of it, Guy got his way. It makes me sick.
As soon as a chilly bite of air nips at my exposed skin, I shiver. We’re out of that hellhole and on our way to Tyler’s car. I finally lift my head to chance another peek at him. His eyebrows are furrowed together as he scowls. For a moment, I wonder if he regrets paying to keep me.
“I’m sorry,” I croak out, my bottom lip wobbling.
His eyes penetrate mine and he stops to lower me to my feet near the car. “I would pay anything for you, Casey. Fucking anything.” With those possessive words, he opens the car door and helps me inside. The moment he’s in too, he peels out and his Audi takes off through the neighborhood at an illegal speed. My phone buzzes again and I pull it out to see many missed texts from Torin.
Torin: Casey, now.
Torin: Now.
Torin: I tracked your phone. I know the address, but I need the wiring instructions.
Torin: Casey, fucking talk to me so I know you’re okay.
My emotions threaten to consume me. I went from having no one who cared about me, aside from a social worker who was paid to—to having two men desperate to keep me safe and secure in their home. With shaking hands, I text him back.
Me: Tyler gave him the money. I’m with your brother and headed back home.
I expect him to reply, but he never does. Despite the disappointment surging through me, I’m quickly distracted when Tyler reaches over and takes my hand in his.
I’m going back home.