Holly woke up to an empty bed: both Kevin and the kitten were gone. Granted, it was after nine—she hadn’t slept so well in years—but still, she should have found some sign of him. She went downstairs to see if he was down there or had left some kind of note. Nothing.
There had to be some kind of logical explanation, but damned if she could come up with one.
She started a pot of coffee, then looked at her phone to see if he’d sent her a message, which was ridiculous. She’d never given him her number.
He really had walked out on her.
She let Killer out, then grabbed her day planner and sat down at the counter, looking at her notes for the day. The day before, Nicole had given Holly a list of things to pick up before she showed up for the shower. With any luck at all, Nicole wanted Holly to help with the setup and then she could go.
But her thoughts kept turning back to Kevin. “Why did he pretend this was something when I’d made it so clear I didn’t expect it to be more?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Melanie asked behind her, sounding groggy. “Men are dicks.”
Holly frowned. “Mel.”
“It’s true and you know it.”
“I don’t know. Kevin was gone when I got up.”
“So he didn’t come back after all.”
Holly’s face jerked up. “You saw him?”
“I’d just come home. He said he had to take his cat to do its business in the litter box.”
Holly pushed her hair from her face, totally confused. “What time was that?” They’d woken up around three a.m. for their last round. Had he gotten out of bed before that and she hadn’t realized it?
“About seven thirty.”
“This morning?”
“Well, yeah.” Her brow lowered.
“Why were you home already? You said you were spending the night.”
Melanie grabbed a mug and poured herself a cup of coffee. “When a man and a woman like each other, sometimes after they’ve dated a few times, they have sex. Or, in your case, they just have sex.” Her snotty tone was totally unlike her.
“Melanie, what’s going on?”
“I broke it off.”
“With Darren? What happened?” Holly got out of her seat and pulled her cousin into a hug.
She rested her cheek on Holly’s shoulder. “He’s an asshole. All men are assholes.”
“Oh, Mel. I’m sorry. You really liked him.”
“I liked him. Past tense. Now I loathe him.”
“He obviously didn’t deserve you.”
“Just like Kerwin doesn’t deserve you.”
“His name is Kevin, and maybe he has a good explanation,” Holly said. “Maybe something came up.”
“And maybe monkeys are going to start flying out of my ass. Accept it, Holly. Men are assholes unworthy of our attention. We should vow to live lives of celibacy.”
After what Holly had experienced with Kevin the night before, celibacy was the last thing on her mind.
“I know that look.” Melanie said, pointing her finger into Holly’s face. “You’re going to give him another chance.”
“But what if he has a good reason?”
“He couldn’t leave a note?”
There was one last place she hadn’t checked. She ran to the front door and looked for a note on the porch or taped to the front door. Nothing.
“Face it, Holly. He got what he wanted. He’s moved on.”
“You’re right. He got what he wanted.” The truth was harder to accept than she’d expected. If it had been half as good for him as it had been for her, wouldn’t he want to see her again? But, then again, he was a gorgeous man. Maybe hopping in and out of beds was what he did. She was sure he had his choice of women, and the woman on his front porch last night was Exhibit A. Besides, she had little to base his performance on. She’d slept with three other men, and two of them hadn’t exactly been live wires out of bed, let alone in it.
Horror rushed through her head. What if it was her? What if she sucked at sex and just didn’t know it?
“Okay,” Melanie said slowly, wrapping her arm around Holly’s shoulders. “I don’t know what you’re thinking right now, but you’re obviously overanalyzing it.” She led her to the bar stool and pushed her down. “Let me get you a cup of coffee. That will help put things in perspective.”
She leaned her elbow on the counter and rested her forehead in her hand. “That I got dumped by my own one-night stand?”
Melanie started to pour coffee into a cup.
“What if I completely suck at sex?”
“You realize that’s, like, nearly impossible, don’t you?”
“I don’t know any such thing. It’s not like you get a grade card at the end of a relationship. Attentive Girlfriend: B-plus; Cooking: D-minus; Sex: F.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Mel handed her the coffee, along with a bottle of creamer. “Sex would be broken down into multiple categories, just like that row of checks, misses, and dashes for ‘needs work’ on our grade-school report cards. You know—Blow Job: plus; Doggie Style: dash; French Kissing: minus; with ‘too wet and sloppy’ in the comment box.”
A renewed wave of horror washed through her. “Oh, my God. I suck at sex.”
Melanie looked up at her in exasperation. “How many times did you do it?”
“What?”
“You know. How many times did he get off?”
“Melanie!”
“Just answer the question.”
Holly’s face burned. “Three.”
Melanie rolled her eyes. “Trust me. He thought you were good. Otherwise he would have been out the door after the first time.”
“Are you sure? Maybe he figured he should get it while he could.”
“Please. I saw the guy. He could have a woman in his bed every night of the week.”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better?”
Melanie gave her a piercing gaze. “Believe it or not, yes.” She leaned closer. “You said you didn’t expect more than just last night, right?”
“Well, yeah…”
“You wanted a round of great sex, and you got it, right?”
“I didn’t put it that way—”
“Was it good?”
Holly blushed. “Yeah.”
“All three times?”
Her blush deepened. “Yeah.”
“Well, there you go. Three rounds of amazing sex to tide you over until you dip your toe back into the asshole pool. It’s better than what I got.”
Holly had been waiting for this opening. She’d known Mel would get there eventually. “What happened?”
“He turned out to be a complete ass, okay?”
“Mel, I’m sorry.”
Tears filled her cousin’s eyes. “Why can’t I find someone to love me, Hol?”
“Oh, Mel. I love you.”
“It’s not the same.”
Her grandmother had said the same thing. “I know. But you need to love you first, Mel.”
A hateful look covered Melanie’s face. “If that’s not calling the kettle black. You won’t even get pissed off that a man just slept with you and lied to you all because you don’t think you deserve him.”
Holly gasped.
“Tell me I’m wrong.”
Tears stung her eyes, mostly because her cousin was being so blunt, but also because she could see some truth in her words. She didn’t think she deserved him.
“Promise me you won’t fall for some bullshit line he gives as an excuse. Because he lives next door and he’s going to have an opening in his schedule. Ten to one he comes crawling back like the slime he is, trying to weasel another go at you.”
“Melanie, I never expected it to be a thing. I thought it would be a one-night stand.”
“Exactly. A one-night stand. Which means it’s over.”
Holly closed her planner and headed for the stairs. “I have to take a shower.”
“Holly…” her cousin called after her. “You know I only tell you this because I love you and want the best for you. A quick roll in the sack is good every now and then, but if you sleep with him again, your heart’s bound to get involved. And that will not end well.”
She knew that all too well, too.
“You deserve to have a great guy, Holly. Don’t settle for an asshole.”
“You need to listen to your own advice,” Holly said without malice.
A wobbly grin lifted Mel’s lips. “Maybe I told myself the same thing this morning.”
Holly pulled her cousin into a hug. “I love you, Mel.”
“I love you, too.” She dropped her hold. “Now you can run away like you always do.”
“No I don’t—” She stopped, because she could see Mel was right about that, too. It had never occurred to her that avoiding relationships was also running away from them. “But in this case, I really do have to go. Nicole’s daughter’s baby shower is this afternoon.”
“Do what? Her daughter’s baby shower?”
“When your boss jumps, you ask how high.”
“No, you find a new boss who doesn’t ask you to jump at all.”
With any luck, she’d be able to start her own business in a few months. But her cousin misunderstood her silence, and when Holly stared to argue, Melanie patted Holly’s cheek. “That’s okay, little grasshopper. One fight at a time.”
The day Holly quit would be more like Armageddon, but she’d worry about that later.