CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Amy
“And that was it?” Jane asked, twirling her hair on the end of her finger. “Didn’t he say anything else?”
“Nope.” I didn’t know why I was crying for the past hour and half. We hardly knew each other after all. Boy, I’d really fallen hard and I hated it.
“You’re really broken up about this guy, aren’t you?”
I sniffed. “How can you tell?” I tried to laugh but Jane wasn’t buying it. She handed me another tissue from an already half-empty box of Kleenex. She had so much pity in her eyes, I thought she was going to cry, herself. Then she straightened her spine, and an angry glean shone in her eyes.
“Well, fuck him,” she shouted. “And I don’t mean in a good way, Amy. Fuck em all! Every last one of ‘em. Fucking men are just not worth our fucking time. That’s all I have to say on the subject.”
I couldn’t help it when a little smile escaped my lips. Jane hardly ever swore these days. She used to. Like a trooper but she’d gone through great lengths to clean up her image once purchasing the Thirsty Turtle. Said it was unprofessional and all that.
I giggled through my tears “That’s a lot of F bombs, Jane, even for you.”
“Yeah, well, you’re just about the best person in the entire universe and if he can’t see that, then fuck him…and the horse he road in on.”
I laughed harder. “What horse?”
“I don’t know. I heard that somewhere but I can tell you this much, I hope he falls in a great big pile of stinky horse shit too for breaking my best friend’s heart.”
I liked the sound of that. Sorta. “And he should fall face forward,” I added.
“Yeah, face forward.”
I grabbed another tissue and blew my nose. “We’d only known each other for a short time. I don’t know why I’m all broken up about this. It’s not like we were in love or anything.”
Jane lifted one eyebrow. “No?”
I shrugged, not answering her question, but I couldn’t meet her eyes.
“What’s that in your eye?”
I ignored her. “I can get another guy just like…” Placing two fingers together, I tried to snap them. “Like that.”
“Right.”
“If I wanted one, that is.”
“Right.”
“Not that I need a man anyway, right”
“Nope.”
“But I could. If I wanted to…”
“Damn straight you could. And a nicer one too.” I reached into the box of tissues only to come up short this time. “Fuck!” I glanced down at my bedroom floor, the sea of used up tissues literally everywhere. I felt even worse.
“Here…”, Jane said, grabbing a small travel sized package of tissues from her purse.
“Jane, what the hell is wrong with me? I was perfectly fine before I met Mister. I’m so brave they should name a God after me Fitzgerald—so why do I feel like shit?”
She frowned and then rubbed little circles into my back.
“Know what else makes my day even more fabulous? Oh that’s so good, Jane. I’ve got knots in my knots. Oh! This is better than sex. Don’t stop.”
“What are you talking about?” She rubbed her knuckles into my shoulder blades. Before Jane had purchased the Thirsty Turtle and after she’d quit waitressing, she attended massage school for six months. It appeared I was the only one reaping the benefits but hey, whose complaining?
I reached for the letter from the bank by the side of my bed. “This is what I’m talking about.” I waved the letter in the air.”
“What’s that?”
“Not sure, but it’s a letter from the bank. I held it up to the light and peered at the envelope. “I can just make out the words: Second Notice. Now, why the hell would we be getting a second notice on anything? The house was paid off ten years ago and dad’s car is long gone.”
“Ask Penelope,” Jane suggested.
“Yeah, like she’d tell me anything. You do know, she spent the last of my college fund after dad went into the nursing home, right?”
Jane’s mouth dropped open. “That fucker! No, you didn’t tell me that but I can’t say I’m surprised.”
“Yeah, well.” I waved the letter back and forth. “I’m not sure I want to know what’s in this, but it can’t be good.”
Jane took an elastic off her wrist and pulled up her hair in a pony tail. “Know what you need, girlfriend? You need a night out. We’ll get all dolled up and...”
“You know I’m not into that, Jane.”
“Come on, Amy. You’re the most responsible person I know and its’ not good for you to be left with all these grown up serious decisions all the time. Live a little. You’re only twenty-two for god’s sake. Act your age for once.”
“I…I don’t know.”
“Just this once. It will be like when we were teenagers.” She batted her long fake eye lashes. “You know what they say. Get back up on that horse and…”
“Didn’t you hear me a second ago? I don’t need a guy to be happy and you agreed with me.”
“No, of course you don’t, but Amy….geese, will you give yourself a break for once? Wouldn’t it be fun to take in a little eye candy?”
“What are you talking about?”
“The Chippendales are dancing tonight. Ride em cowboy!” She slapped her ass and pranced around the room.
I burst out laughing. “How do you do that?”
“What?”
“Make me laugh when all I want to do is cry?”
“It’s one of my many talents.”
“I’ll think about it.” I swept a mirror off the dresser and held it in front of me. Go out? To a bar? Where they have men and all that? If I did go, my work was cut out for me. My face was puffed up like a blowfish, my skin pale and blotchy. I frowned at my pitiful reflection.
“Look at me, Jane. Will you just look at me! Do you really want to be seen with me looking like this? I look like a swarm of bees mated on my face! “
“Minor matters.”
“Besides, I feel like crap. I’m in no shape. I….”
“Nonsense. That will all fade away in due time, and then you’ll be as gorgeous as you always were.” Amy pulled a strand of hair behind my ear. “Still beautiful missy. And besides you can wear my black sparkle dress. You know, the one you said you wanted to be buried in.”
I laughed again. “I did not say that but I do like the dress. On you, I might add.”
Jane jumped up and down on the edge of my bed. I had to admit, she was very persuasive, and I loved her sense of humor. I’d have to try hard, if I planned on being miserable around Jane.
“You did,” Jane shrieked. “Remember? You said you would have to be dead to wear a dress that revealing.”
“I didn’t mean…”
“Listen, you need to prove something to yourself. Here...” She placed the mirror back in my hand. “Now repeat after me.”
I giggled knowing exactly what she had in mind because it was usually me that shoved the mirror in front of Jane’s face after some idiotic gal broke her heart.
“I’m not playing Snow White’s evil stepmother with you,” I said, lowering the mirror.
“You are.” She lifted the mirror back up. “You are a strong, sexy as hell independent woman and you don’t need a man.”
“I don’t…”
“Say it!”
“Okay, okay. You are a strong…”
“You know what I mean.”
“All right, all right. I am a strong, independent woman and I don’t need a man.”
“Louder.”
“This isn’t going to…”
“I said louder!”
“I am a strong, independent woman and I don’t need a man.”
“Again.”
“I am a strong….this is ridiculous, Jane.” I lowered the mirror again.
“Think of it this way,” she said giving me another tissue. “Let all those assholes out there know what they don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of getting in your panties. Wear the dress. Have a good time, flirt a little, and we’ll call it a night. Okay?”
I sighed and bit my lip. I was miserable now, but I knew without a doubt that going out with Jane was exactly what I needed. I couldn’t remember one time when I’d not had a blast in Jane’s company. Jane was smart and one of the most beautiful women I ever knew, which I guess gave her confidence. She had long golden hair, lashes that nearly hit her cheekbones and a curvy figure that looked good in everything she wore. She was also gay, which was kind of funny in itself. She absolutely knew what she was talking about. The upside to us being seen together was we could pretend we were an item if the heat got too hot. “Okay. Let me get some makeup on.”
Jane’s eyes lit up as she clapped her hands like a child. “Yay! I’ll be back soon with the dress.” She kissed me on the head and made me promise not to cry anymore.
“What the hell do I need with an old fireman like that anyway?” I muttered before she went out the door.
But deep in my heart, I knew it was a lie.
***
Jane took me to of all places, the Thirsty Turtle, citing the wonderful band that was playing before the dancers came out and the new chef that would prepare anything we wanted. She sounded so proud of her accomplishments, so what could I say? I was proud of her too.
I smoothed the lines of my black satin dress, which barely covered my tits, slid over in the red leather booth, and pasted on my best smile.
The place was crowded as ever, the food fantastic and service better than most high end restaurants. Jane was making a killing these days, and I was happy for her. It was nice to see someone who grew up with so little, living her dream.
The lights were low, the air full of laughter and I had to admit, I felt immediately better simply by being out with people. Especially since I wasn’t the one waiting on tables. Within minutes of seating us, Jack, the head waiter was at our table with a menu, ready to take our order. He brightened when he saw Jane. “Boss! I almost didn’t recognize you in that dress.”
“What? This old thing?” She was wearing a hollowed out, rhinestone studded v-neck that practically hit her navel. Long dark tresses cascaded about bare her shoulders. Jack was sweet, smart and buff, also a bit of a player but I liked him anyway.
“How’s the crowd?” Jane asked.
“Not too bad. So far, not your usual ruffians.”
“We do not serve ruffians,” Jane snapped.
“Sorry, my mistake. I meant…the more enthusiastic patrons of our establishment.”
“Better.”
I laughed. By enthusiastic, Jack meant men who got stinking drunk and groping at the waitresses. He would be forced to throw them out.
“So what exactly does that mean when you say ‘not your usual’?” Jane glanced around the room. She focused on a few tables in the back. “Those men look harmless.”
Following her gaze, Jack said, “Yeah, they’re all right. See the table on the left? Those are all cops and the one on the right, firemen. One of them is getting married so they came for the show.”
“The girls’ show doesn’t start for hours,” Jane turned to me. “I had to book female dancers to open for the Chippendales.”
“They’ll be pretty toasted by the time the girls come out and dance but hey, can’t call the cops if they’re already here right?”
“Right.”
I refused to turn around at the mention of firemen . I told myself that was ridiculous. Brock said he hardly left the station at all. What were the chances he was here? He worked pretty much around the clock. My heart squeezed and tears pricked behind my eyes.
“I’m sure they’re just having a good time,” Jane said. “Give them a round of drinks on the house. Tell them it’s to celebrate the ball and chain on the guy getting hitched.”
“Will do, boss.”
“Oh and then bring us a couple of white wines and cheeseburgers if you would.”
Jack nodded, his blonde bangs falling over his left eye.
Jane leaned across the table, her green eyes sparkling. “Sooooo,” she said, conspiratorially. “Any of them catch your eye?”
I frowned. “I am not dating anyone in uniform ever again.”
“Oh please. They can’t be all bad. Besides, some of them look pretty good dressed down. That is…if you’re into that.”
“Not really, Jane. Look where it got me.”
“You wouldn’t even know they were cops and firemen if Jack hadn’t mentioned it. Geeze, you can’t judge all men by your little boy toy.”
“My what!”
“See. I got your juices flowing. They’re hot. You know they are.”
“Whatever happened to your ‘we don’t need a man’ mantra?”
She gave me a devilish grin. “A girls’ gotta have fun some time, and besides you’re not looking for a relationship, right? Just a little action if you know what I mean. That’s what you need, Ame. That’s what you always needed.”
I blew out a breath knowing she was right but… How could I act flirty when my heart was broken in so many pieces? I was a mess, plain and simple. “I don’t know, Jane. Maybe this is too soon.”
“Hold that thought. One of the hotties is coming over right now.”
Oh god.
I forced myself to look up when all I wanted to do was crawl beneath the table. When he reached my side, I swallowed hard and adjusted my dress, hoping I didn’t look too slutty. He introduced himself as Mr. Robinson. He was tall, and dark as black coffee. He also looked scared, but that didn’t concern me in the least. I wasn’t feeling very charitable tonight.
He smiled shyly. “My pals and I want to know if we can buy you a drink.” He glanced back toward the table of men. “You see, I’m getting married and they sort of…dragged me out here.”
“And made you do their dirty work huh?”
Robinson was silent and he didn’t crack a smile, just looked at us glumly, like he was waiting for a bus.
“This one is serious,” whispered Jane in my ear. “Cut him some slack. It’s not his fault they put him up to it.”
“No,” I snapped and then Jane kicked me under the table. “Hey!” I kicked her back.
“Owe!” Then I burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry. What I meant to say,” I continued in a mock Southern accent. “How very gallant of y’all. Ya’ll really want to buy drinks for little old us?”
Jane’s eyes widened in disbelief.
“Why, that’s just the sweetest li’l ole thing I ever heard of. Jane, Isn’t that the sweetest li’l ole thing you ever heard of?”
Jane turned away quickly. She grabbed her napkin, smothering her laughter with it.
“Actually, we already have drinks,” I said. “Maybe later though?”
Looking utterly defeated, Robinson shifted foot to foot, apparently not knowing what to say next. Geeze, how the hell did this guy propose marriage? He glanced behind him at the table where his comrades sat, then back in my direction. Then he shoved his hands in his pockets and left, head hung low.
When he was out of earshot, Jane burst out laughing. “So now you’re Scarlett O’Hara?”
I shrugged. “You said to have fun.”
“Well, you could have let them buy us more drinks. When I said have fun I meant with company.”
“Oh.”
After we’d finished our drinks, one of the men sent us appetizers. I glanced back to see if they were watching, but only one was looking our way. There was lots of hooting and hollering going on, and I almost regretted my rude behavior. As if they knew I was watching, a few of the men waved their drinks in the air as if inviting me over. I looked in the other direction, pretending I hadn’t noticed.
“What is the matter with you?” Jane finally said. “Snap out of it, woman. Can’t you at least try to have fun? For me?”
“Sorry and you’re absolutely right. I’ll try.”
“When?” She rolled her eyes.
“The next guy that comes over, I’ll give him my name and number.”
Jane looked at me suspiciously. “You will?”
“Sure. I can always ignore his calls when he calls me. Will that do?”
She gave me her pouty face. “It’s a start. I guess.”
Thirty minutes later, I still wasn’t having fun. After five drinks and not enough sleep the night before, I could hardly keep my eyes open. I wondered if I could convince Jane to take me home. Before I could ask however, the lights dropped low, a cue that that floor show was about to begin. I jerked my head at Jane in a ‘let’s get outa here’ gesture but she glared back at me, holding up a hand.
“Only five more minutes,” I mouthed.
After twenty minutes of half-naked women dancing and sliding around poles, the lights came back on. A woman in a gold lame dress announced an intermission. I blinked hard, trying to adjust my eyes, which smarted like hell.
Soft music drifted over the dance floor and two men from the fireman’s table approached ours.
“Hi,” said a man about my own age. His long black hair swept back in a pony tail. He had olive skin and deep-set eyes brown eyes. “I’m Garcia.” He chuckled. “Sorry. I meant to say, Mateo Garcia but everyone calls me Garcia.” He glanced from me to Jane. “You ladies having fun tonight?”
“She owns the place,” I blurted, tipping my head in Jane’s direction.
Mateo smiled at Jane. “I see. Well, thanks for the drinks earlier.” He looked back at the table and then back at the two of us. “Listen, we’ve been trying to pay you back all night. Twice we tried to send drinks over but that guy over there wasn’t having it.” He motioned to the bouncer by the door. “I thought…maybe we offended you? I’d really hate it if we offended you.”
“Oh noooo. No, not at all,” said Jane rising to her feet. “Please, sit. Sit with us and I’ll explain.”
What the f…! We were just about to leave. I stared at Jane like she just had her head amputated, but she refused to glance in my direction.
Mateo slid into the booth, slapping his palms happily on the table. I caught the scent of rich spicy hops and oiled leather as his knee brushed up against my bare thigh. I frowned.
“Hi, I’m Mateo,” he repeated holding his hand out to shake mine.
“Amy. Amy Lynn.” I gave Jane an “I’ll kill you later,” glare. Then I shook Mateo’s hand.
“Listen, Mateo,” Jane began. “My friend here just came off a terrible breakup.”
Mateo perked up. He tried not to smile but I could see the corners of his mouth quirking up.
“And her boyfriend just happened to be a firefighter too so you see…”
“I understand. Bad Karma huh?”
“Sort of.”
“Hmm, well… I guess I’ll leave you ladies alone. I’m sorry I—” He slid his body across the leather seat toward the edge, clearly about to leave before Jane grabbed him by the hand. “Don’t! Amy wants to give you something?”
Damn.
Mateo gave me a wide grin. “Wow, it’s my lucky day then, huh? What is it you want to give me?”
“Um…”
“Give it to him, Amy.”
I’d never picked up a man in a bar in my life but then again I’d never hijacked a man in his office either. “Okay,” I said. “I was going to text you my number but... You don’t have to take it if you don’t want to. I mean, you don’t know me and I don’t know you. After all we just met each other and…”.
“Of course I want it,” he said eagerly.
A lump formed in my throat. I wasn’t even attracted to the guy, but a promise was a promise. This was what I got for being a good girl all the time.
I reached into my sequined clutch on the seat on the seat between us and took out my cell. I froze. My heart hammered in my chest and for a moment I couldn’t breathe. Brock’s last text message stared back at me. It was sexy and all kinds of wrong. The kind of wrong that make a gal’s nipples harden into sharp painful peaks. The kind of message you don’t share with another human being. Below the scandalous one was: You’re mine and no one else’s. Part of me wanted to text him back, to remind him of that promise. The other part of me wanted to scream, ‘fuck you, Brock Fitzgerald!’ I took a deep breath, willing the tears to stay at bay.
“Ame,” Jane asked in a concerned tone of voice. “You all right?”
My head was still lowered, gazing into my purse. I erased the messages and then took out my phone.
I turned to Mateo. “Give me your number. I’ll text you and then you’ll have mine.”
“Right.”
And that was that.
I was officially back on the market.
***
Two days later, Mateo called me. Even though I was at my lowest, I was glad to have someone to talk to. I’d just received the second notice from the bank, the one that said I had only two weeks to pay the very high mortgage payment. To make matters worse we were already in default and it wasn’t the first time. Apparently Penelope had begged, borrowed and pleaded for an extra six months. The broker said he couldn’t give me any more time. I didn’t just owe this month’s payment but all six months in arrears as well. I was at my wit’s end and I didn’t know what to do so I did the only thing I could do. I unloaded the whole pitiful story onto the shoulders of a perfect stranger.
“I shouldn’t be telling you all this. It’s not your problem,” I told Mateo over the phone.
“Nonsense,” he said, kindly. “That’s what friends do. They tell each other their problems.”
“Maybe.” Were we friends? I’d never had a male friend before. I let out a breath, trying not to let him know how pathetic I was feeling. I had no money, no college fund and pretty soon my family home would be repossessed. What an idiot I was. No, I was the queen of idiots.
“I could lend you the money,” Mateo said.
“Oh Mateo, that is so sweet, but no. I have to figure this out for myself.”
“But it’s a lot of money, Amy and two weeks isn’t a long time to pay it back.”
“I’ll think of something,” I lied. Actually, I was out of options.
“Well, if you do need a place to stay, you can always come stay with me.”
“Um.”
“I can get a cot or sleep on the floor. I only have one twin bed but it’s all yours if you want it.”
In the back of my mind I thought, ‘you’re offering me thirty thousand dollars to save my house, but you don’t even have a decent apartment?’
“It’s okay, Mateo. You’re very sweet but I’ll find a way. And Jane can put me up if I’m really desperate.”
“Jane? Oh yeah, the chic at the Thirsty Turtle. She’s cool. She can come too.”
“That’s not such a good idea.”
He sounded disappointed, probably just wanted a threesome. My heart fell a little. I really wanted to like this guy.
“Listen,” I said. “Can I give you a rain-check on that date? I need to figure this out first and then I promise I’ll call you. I’m not very good company right now anyway.”
“You know two heads are better than one,” he countered.
“Mateo…”
“Sure. Sure, we can go out any time, but if I don’t hear from you in a few days, I’m throwing you over my shoulder and carrying you away.”
I laughed. It was nice to have someone care about me that much. Or at least want me that much. “Okay, Mateo.”
As I hung up the phone I realized Mateo was my friend. I doubted it would lead us anywhere romantically, but I’d been wrong before. I could be wrong again.