Liam rushes over, his suit jacket billowing in the wind, glancing between Becca and me, his eyes narrow at our hands entwined tightly around my neck. “She’s bleeding! He cut her” Becca’s panicked voice makes more tears stream down my cheeks. Liam’s eyes go so wide I think they’ll pop out of his head. My chest rises and falls quicker than is considered normal and I know an attack is imminent. I can’t see where the blood is coming from. I can’t see it. I need to see it.
“Let me see!” he demands, prying Becca’s hand away from my neck. I glance at her tiny fingers, covered in my crimson blood. It can’t be that bad of a cut otherwise I wouldn’t be standing. Right? Slowly she removed her hand further, and I untangle mine, allowing Liam a better view. Dipping his head and tilting my chin with a firm grip, narrowing his eyes he assesses the damage. “Okay. You’re alright, it’s not deep but you might need a stitch or two” Pulling a handkerchief out of pocket he holds it against my neck. “Hold that there, it should help stop the bleeding”
“Thank you” I croak. Not missing the irony that this isn’t what I had planned when I wanted to bump into him tonight.
“Thank God!” Becca sighs, tearing my thoughts back.
“You should still get checked out. The police are on their way” Liam’s hand comes around to the small of my back. I wince as he catches some of the newly formed scrapes there.
“No, I don’t want to talk to the police. I want to go home”
“Amelia, you have to give a statement”
“NO!” I almost shout, wincing at the pain in my throat.
“Liam” Becca nods her head to side, indicating for Liam to follow her. He glances between me and her before walking slightly and ducking his head to hear her. I don’t care what she’s telling him, I want to go home. The comfort of my four walls and a dead-bolted door.
“You can head home if you want. I’ll see that she’s okay” Liam turns to Becca as they walk back towards me.
“I’m not leaving her” Becca shakes her head as he speaks.
“I’m fine” I wave my hand between the pair of them. “Honestly, I can get home” I know I’m going to have an attack, I can feel the panic slithering up from the tips of my toes and I want to be alone when it hits.
“You need to be looked at Amelia. Especially if you don’t want to involve the police” Liam scolds, his face turning almost thunderous.
“He’s right Mia”
“No. I just want to go home” my voice cracks but I hope it sounded a lot firmer to them than it did to me. I’m an adult now, no one can make me do anything. Fuck if I don’t sound like a hormonal teenager. Liam sighs heavily before glancing at Becca again. Sympathy and defeat flash across his features before he speaks again.
“I’ll take you home. Becca my driver will take you”
“Oh, there’s no need…” she starts but Liam interrupts.
“Why do women always argue?” he huffs before turning and facing me.
“You will go home with me, I will make sure you are seen to” I go to argue but am interrupted when he faces Becca and points a long finger in her direction.
“And you, will go home with my driver so I know you’re both safe”
Becca glances at me, pursing her lips together, and I can’t help the giggle that escapes my lips. I mouth the word ‘caveman’ at her before Liam snaps my attention back to him.
“What was that?”
“Nothing. Thank you, lets’ go” I agree, wanting to get out of here faster than I’m currently being allowed to.
“Call me” Becca says before turning and heading towards the car Liam pointed out.
“I will” I offer her a reassuring smile before watching her greet the driver and jumping into the car.
I clutch my coat around me tighter, while maintaining pressure on my neck wound. I doubt it’s barley a scratch and their overreacting, but I don’t feel like being shouted at again.
“Come on” Liam’s arm wraps around my waist as he guides me towards a waiting Range Rover Jeep. Opening the passenger side door for me, he ushers me inside. The warmth is welcoming from the bitter air and my frozen bones. Liam reaches across me with the seat belt and I get a waft of his spicy aftershave. I stiffen as he leans closer, fastening the belt before retreating outside. This is not how I imagined tonight would end.
“I could have done that” I advise before he scrunches his brow at me like I’m a petulant child and slams the door.
Liam hops into the driver side, giving me a quick once over before pulling out into traffic. I glance back at the club, at the brick wall that I was recently pressed up against and I blink my tears away. My back chafes against the fabric of my coat, irritating the already broken skin.
“I’ll take you to the hospital first, and then I’ll take you home” Liam offers without tearing his eyes from the road. Panic seeps into my pores at the mere idea of going to such a sterile place. The warm interior of the car blends with the cold, itchy air of the hospital, and I suddenly feel breathless.
“No. I can’t…No hospitals”
“What?” he flicks his eyes to me briefly before coming to a stop at a red light.
“I’m fine Liam, really. I don’t need to go to the hospital” I hope to god that he buys my plea. I will avoid hospitals for as long as I can, and I hold my neck tighter willing it to stop bleeding. If it stops he won’t take me.
“Amelia…you’re neck…”
“Liam. No” I don’t give him the chance to finish, my snappiness is unwarranted towards him, but I can’t help it. I won’t go to the hospital. I can’t! Not after last time. Liam inches the car forward as the lights change, and I suddenly feel queasy. The thought of going to a hospital still to this day makes my insides churn. The antiseptic smell, the taste of death and the searing pain. God the pain.
Clutching my neck tighter, I start to feel light headed. I try to relax my hand, but it’s stuck around my wind pipe. The motion of the car rocks me from side to side, as I struggle to inhale. Spicy incense mix with my bleached memories, weighing on my chest like a two-ton man. My ribs ache as I try to draw in desperately needed air. Cracking sounds ring in my ears as my blood starts to drum in my ears. Another crack vibrates around me, bouncing around the plush interior of Liam’s car and I vaguely hear myself cry out. The pain. I squeeze my eyes tight, only for more memories to dance around my lids like evil little cinema movies.
Crack. My ribs combust under the weight of a boot, the pain shooting around my midriff and down my legs. Tears spring to my eyes, as I fail to make a sound. Scrambling to my feet I clutch my arm around my broken bones as I run to freedom. Only for that freedom to turn into a tumbling, falling, fleeting sensation. I hit the floor with a thud, pain splices its way up my arm, across my shoulder and down to my already shattered ribs. Sucking in a breath, I pant as I will myself to get up. Get up! My right arm hangs limp by my side, and I have to fight to get my weight on my other as I tug myself to standing. Blessed oxygen finally makes its way into my shattered ribs as I limp slightly to the door. Freedom.
“Amelia…Amelia…It’s okay”
“Come on, breathe. No one’s going to hurt you”
The voice is new. Screwing my eyes tighter, I wonder where I’ve heard it before. It isn’t one of them…one of my attackers. No. It isn’t my mother’s cracked, smoke riddled voice.
“Amelia, I’ve got you. Come on sweetheart”
Liam. It’s Liam’s voice I can hear. What is he doing here? He shouldn’t be here. They’ll kill him. My breathing accelerates as I struggle even more to escape.
“Amelia!”
I snap my eyes open, a little dazed as the fog struggles to clear.
“It’s okay. I’m here, just breathe” Liam is crouched down in front of me on the pavement. I glance around quickly and notice that he must have pulled over. My door is open, and my legs are swung over the side, my head is between my legs, pressed gently by Liam’s hand on my back.
Sweet, ice cold air finally breaks the barrier of my panic attack and enters my lungs. I suck harder, willing my now healed ribs to inflate at the delicious sensation.
“Slowly, slowly. That’s it” Liam’s voice finally breaks through the hurricane of my attack as his hand rubs soothing circles on my spine.
Once my breathing returns to a relatively normal rate, I inch myself upwards. Liam remains on his haunches in front of me, staring up at me with crystal blue eyes, laced with concern.
I blow out a puff of air, taking with it the last of the crushing feeling around each of my ribs.
“Sorry” my voice is gravel in my throat and I wince slightly as it tears up my skin.
“Don’t apologize Amelia. Take a few minutes okay?”
I nod, not wanting my throat to rip itself to shreds. Liam stands but doesn’t leave my side. People whiz past him, not wanting to stop to see the hyperventilating woman in the car. I’m grateful that he’s closed the door slightly now, giving me more of an element of privacy.
“You alright?” his voice is like a comfort blanket, wrapping me in his concern and warmth. I nod again before spinning myself back inside the car. Closing the door, he comes around and gets back in behind the wheel.
We don’t say a word to each other as he reaches over the center console and takes my hand in his. Both our palms are frozen as he pulls out into the traffic, using one hand to steer us home.