Piper
“Hey.”
I look up to see Reba standing in front of the table I’m sitting on outside the clubhouse. “Hey yourself.”
“Mind if I join you?”
I shrug and take a drag on my cigarette. “Knock yourself out.” She pulls herself up next to me and I offer her my beer. “Want a drink?”
She shakes her head. “No, thanks, I’m fine.”
A brief silence ensues as we both stare out ahead, two women with one fucked up connection.
“I’m sorry, Piper. For what happened. For what Marco did to you, but you have to believe me when I tell you, I had no idea. You know how they keep so much shit from us…”
I turn to face her, taking a long draft of beer as my eyes meet hers. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“No, I know, but…”
“What made you marry a man like that, Reba?”
“What made you marry a man like Vanni Colletti?”
Oh, she can throw them right back, she’s good. And I let the corner of my mouth edge up into a slight smile, my eyes remaining locked on hers.
“I had a good reason for becoming involved with Vanni. I needed protection. What’s your excuse?”
She breaks the stare and drops her gaze and I actually feel sorry for her now. “You didn’t love him, though. Did you? When you first met him?”
I stare straight ahead of me again, drawing deep on my cigarette before I answer her. “No. I didn’t. But I never did believe in love at first sight.” I turn my head to look at her, and she’s raised her gaze now, her eyes are back on mine.
“You love him now, though? Right?”
I narrow my eyes slightly and take another long draft of beer. “Why did you really come here, Reba? I mean, was it because you really wanted to escape that life with my fucked up family? Because, y’know, I can completely understand why you’d want to leave that prick of a husband behind. But you didn’t have to come here, did you? You didn’t have to come to the other side of the country to find help. I’m sure you had options much closer to home.” I take another swig of beer, keeping my eyes fixed on hers. “You come back for Logan, huh? All that time married to that pig of a man made you realize what you’d thrown away?”
“That’s none of your business.”
“No. It isn’t. I just thought you might want to talk, y’know? Seeing as we have so much in common.”
“Like what?”
I turn my head away from her, staring back out across the locked compound. The gates are shut, Vanni has men all around the yard, front and back, armed men. And I’m still unsure whether it’s enough to stop what I know my father is capable of; what a man like Marco Vierra is capable of. And that changes the mood, just like that.
“We’re both just trying to stay alive, Reba. That’s what.”
The silence between us hangs heavy in the air now, even though all around us there’s noise – loud chatter, laughter, the sound of bikes being revved up, there’s nothing quiet about life on this compound right now.
“I thought he might’ve forgiven me.”
My head shoots back around to look at her. Hers is still down, her hands clasped between her knees, and I feel a wave of guilt wash over me.
“But I don’t think he ever will.”
“Logan’s a good man, Reba. Deep down. Maybe if you talk to him…”
She shakes her head. “No. I blew it, Piper. He’s moved on, he’s not the same man anymore.”
“There’ll always be a part of that man somewhere inside of him.”
She finally raises her gaze, her eyes meeting mine. “You sound like you know him so well.”
“I hardly know him at all, Reba. But sometimes I can just tell. Sometimes I just ‘get’ a person.”
She chuckles quietly and drops her gaze again. “Yeah. OK.”
She’s a beautiful woman, is Reba Kane. All long dark curls, cheekbones that could cut glass, she’s stunning. And I can understand why Logan fell for her the way he did, she would’ve been just as hot when she was younger. But now there’s a weariness to her, almost as if she knows her life is about to change, in a way she’d never expected. But that’s inevitable now. She can’t change that.
“Even if Logan had wanted to give us another try, after all this time, I have to go, don’t I?” She looks up again, and that weariness just floods her beautiful face. “And I couldn’t expect him to drop everything and come with me. I’ve done enough to ruin his life as it is.”
“You didn’t ruin his life, Reba. You changed it, there’s a difference.”
“And I think he’s settled here. He seems settled, here.”
I can’t reassure her on that one because I really have no handle on what Logan Sandero is thinking or feeling no matter how much I think I might.
“Maybe a new start is what you need,” I say quietly, and she smiles, once more dropping her gaze.
“Yeah. Yeah, maybe you’re right.” She slides down from the table and heads back inside, stopping as she reaches the clubhouse door, turning back around to face me. “I really am sorry, Piper. You didn’t deserve what they did to you. But Vanni, he’ll see that my bastard of a husband won’t hurt anyone like that ever again.”
He will, she’s right. Vanni means what he says, he does what he threatens. And then I think of me and Logan and what he’d threaten to do, to both of us, if he found out what we’d done. What we’re still doing now. What we both really want to do…
“Getting to know our new girl, huh?”
I look up to see Vanni approaching, aviator shades covering his dark eyes, that swagger he always carries on full display as he heads toward me.
“Something like that, yeah.”
He stops in front of me and lights up a cigarette, taking a drag and blowing smoke down at the ground before he raises his head, his eyes instantly locking on mine.
“When this is over, you’re gonna help Reba disappear, right? Help her start again, create a whole new life for her?”
He nods slowly, taking another drag on his cigarette. “We’re gonna help her do that, yeah.”
“So, why don’t I have to disappear, too? I mean, in a way I’m in more danger than she is, and when my father finds out that I’m still alive, because he will, find out I’m still alive – when that happens, you think he’s just gonna sit back and accept he’s been beaten? He’s gonna come for me again and again, Vanni…”
“I said we were gonna take your daddy’s men on, Piper, and that’s exactly what I’m gonna do.”
“Until each and every one of them is dead? Huh? Is that what we’re looking at here, ‘cause…”
“I said trust me, Piper. So just do that, darlin’, OK? And the reason why you’re not disappearing? You don’t have to. You’re my wife, and you ain’t going nowhere, baby.”
I watch him turn away and stride into the clubhouse, and all I can feel is my stomach turning, the nausea’s rising, I’m scared, for a hundred different reasons.
I’ve betrayed that man. The man who wants nothing more than to save me.
I’ve betrayed him.
My soldier.
My protector.
My husband.
I’ve betrayed him. And if he finds out, Frankie Cabbetto won’t be the only man who wants me dead.
Vanni
“Anyone seen Logan?”
People aren’t staying where they should be staying, I’m having to look for them and that’s wasting my time.
“Think he’s out back.” Dragon jerks his head toward the corridor that leads out into the back yard and I head off down there, flinging the door open, and Dragon’s right. Logan’s leaning back against the wall, smoking a joint, looking way too relaxed for someone with so much shit hanging over his head.
“Everything OK here?”
His head shoots around to face me. “Yeah. Everything’s fine.”
“The women all right?”
“Seem to be.”
“You?”
“I’m fine. What the fuck does it matter how I feel anyway?”
“It doesn’t matter. I was just trying to be friendly, y’know, seeing as you’re having to deal with the reappearance of the woman who broke your heart.”
He narrows his eyes as he stares me down, he don’t like the way I’m making this sound. But it’s the truth. Piper told me as much.
“Piper been talking to you, huh?”
“She’s my wife, Logan. She tells me everything.”
He turns his head away from me and takes another drag on his joint. “She didn’t tell you who she really was, not at first.”
“I already knew who she was. There are no more secrets, not now.”
There’s something about the way his body reacts to that last sentence, I don’t know. It’s hard to put my finger on it, but something happened there. A drop of the shoulders, a slight twist of a smile, I don’t know. Maybe I should be keeping a closer eye on Logan Sandero.
“She been talking to you?”
As soon as I ask that question he looks at me, but his expression is impassive. Blank. This guy can do emotionless better than me. Sometimes.
“Not really. Only the stuff you wanted her to tell me. About her family. Nothing personal, don’t worry.”
“I’m not worried, Logan.”
But maybe he should be.
Maybe…
Logan
It’s like I’ve got some kind of death wish, the way I’m reacting to Vanni, the way I’m acting. I guess I’m just tired, of all the shit and the lies; the deceit. Shit that could get me killed, Piper too. And yet, there’s a part of me that actually wishes he’d find out, then it’s out there, in the open, and neither me nor Piper could turn back from that. We may not get a chance to.
“Vierra’s getting closer, Logan. I’m calling church in a little while, make sure everyone’s here.”
He turns and heads back inside and I breathe a heavy sigh of relief. My head’s so fucked up right now, the only thing I’m sure of is that what I said to Piper before, I meant it. All of it. I meant every fucking word, I want her. Am I falling in love with her? I don’t know. It’s been that long since I left myself open to that emotion I’m not even sure what it feels like anymore. Do I feel all messed-up crazy whenever I see her? Do I wish I could wake up with her there beside me, fall asleep with her in my arms; does having her around, just knowing she’s there, does that make me feel different? Yeah. All of that shit so, maybe, y’know? Maybe I really am learning what it’s like to love someone again. I just didn’t think that someone would be the wife of the man whose club saved me. And there’s a part of me that wished Reba’s reappearance – part of me wishes I’d felt differently, when I saw her. Part of me wishes I could’ve felt the same way I felt all those years ago, when I’d wanted nothing more than her, a family, a stable fucking life, but she drove me to this. To where I am now. And there’s no room in this life for her, for the people we once were. It’s too fucking late. I’m in love with another woman now, there, I’ve said it.
I’m in love with another woman.
A woman I can’t have.
I can’t have her.
And I still fucking want her…