CHAPTER 7
Ashlyn
How the hell do I always get myself stuck in these situations? It’s not like I’m a people pleaser or Susie fucking Sunshine. I’m definitely neither of the two. Last night when Josh was running down the hall yelling my name I almost lost it. It was 2am, only a couple hours after he questioned if the baby was his and I was having the best damn dream of Charlie Hunnam. What the hell was he thinking? I had no choice but to pull him in my room so he wouldn’t get arrested. He said some gibberish about a baby and midnight diaper changes before passing out in my bed. Did I mention that he was only wearing his underwear? Can’t I catch a break?
When I reach the elevator, Josh is waiting for me. He’s freshly showered wearing well-worn jeans and a black tee stretched tight over his chest. The backward black hat on his head makes it hard to look above his shoulders. Damn. His hat always makes me a little tingly.
As we ride down the elevator together, the word awkward comes to mind. The way he stares at me is making me feel awkward. Every time he gives me a hint of a smile, like he’s sharing a secret only the two of us know, is awkward. The fact that neither of us have spoken a word to each other since I saw him in the hall is really freaking awkward.
I’m keeping a safe distance away from him, but it’s hard when there are so many people moving about this morning. Every time we get close I can smell his aftershave. I love the smell and I hate myself for it. We’re heading towards the best diner according to Josh and I could really care less as long as I get some decent food.
“Sit anywhere you like.” An older waitress tells us.
We walk towards the back and pick a booth in the corner. As I look over the menu, I can’t get chocolate chip pancakes or waffles with peanut butter out of my head. I bite my lip trying to decide which I want.
“What are the choices?” Josh asks knowing this is always my dilemma. You would think being a chef would make me a take charge kind of gal when it comes to my food.
“Chocolate chip pancakes and peanut butter waffles.”
The waitress returns to our booth and Josh winks at me before ordering both for me and a meat lover’s omelet for himself.
After she walks away I know I need to get the show on the road. “Listen Josh, I just want you to know I’m sorry about how you found out. I planned on telling you when the moment was right, but obviously Savvy and her big fat mouth had other plans.”
“I don’t like that you hid this from me, at all. Seeing you walk out of the restaurant after I found out killed me. Was I angry at first? Hell yes. I just learned I’d been lied to, and the woman I love and wished was the one carrying my child claims to be just that.”
“What you said to me was bullshit. How could you ever think this baby could be someone else’s? Do you think so little of me that you’d think I’d jump right into someone else’s bed? Last I checked that was you. You left. You chose another woman over me. Yet, you question me in front of everybody. Do you know how much that hurt? Having everyone think I’m whoring around and trying to trap you.”
“When I heard Savvy, all I could think was it’s the same. I’m in the same situation, just with a different woman. I can’t go through that hurt again Ashlyn.”
“I don’t need anything from you, neither does this baby. After it’s born I’ll have a paternity test and we’ll go from there. You have plenty of time to decide whether you want to be in this baby’s life. Just know that if you’re in, it’s 100%. This baby deserves that and so do I.”
“Hold the hell up Ash. I told you that’s how I felt, not how I feel. The paternity never should have been a question. I know this baby is mine and I will be there for the both of you. The whole walk over I was thinking about how I feel. The conclusion…I’m fucking thrilled. We made this baby. We’re a family.”
“I don’t want to give you mixed signals Josh. Just because we’re having a baby doesn’t mean anything for us. We will co parent and that’s where the line’s drawn. After the baby’s born we’ll figure out a schedule and visitation times.”
Josh growls, like growls so loud that everyone starts staring. I drop my head into my hands and sigh.
“If anything, this has shown me we’re meant to be. It’s kismet. I’m not giving up hope on us and I won’t be dictated as to when I can visit my child. You may not believe me, but every single day since that morning I left, there has been a gaping hole right here.” He bangs his fist on his chest over his heart. “And it only feels whole again when I’m with you. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I love you and I won’t give up on us.”
“Upfront is the only way I’m going to be with you Josh. I’m so happy you want to be a part of this baby’s life and be there for me, but that’s it. There still isn’t and never will be an us again. I can get past the emotions but I can’t get past the fact that you left me for another woman. I’m sorry if that changes your mind at all, but that’s how it has to be.”
“Nothing that ever happens between us will affect my relationship with my child. Let’s just get that part out of the way. I told you back home that I was going to fight for you and that’s what I intend to do still. You may think you’re safer closing your heart off to me, but I’m here to let you know that you can trust me with it. Hurting you was the biggest regret of my life and it will never happen again.”
Why is it when I’m around Josh I just want him to hold me? I can already feel my walls starting to crack as I try to reinforce them.
“Alright we’ve said what needs to be said. Let’s go back to being friends so this awkward conversation is over with and I can enjoy my freaking pancakes.”
Laughing Josh picks up his coffee. I reach for my orange juice and take a healthy gulp. So good.
After I wolf down my food leaving not one spec of a crumb behind, Josh asks me if I want to see the sights. I kind of do, but that’s definitely sending him the wrong message, so I tell him I’m going back to the hotel. When we get to my room I say my goodbyes and close the door. As I lean my back against it, I try to think about how I found myself here. At least everything’s good on the baby front. I don’t need to worry about this dark lingering secret hanging over my head anymore. I lay down in bed trying to fall asleep. Because of Josh’s little show last night, I barely slept. A nap will do me good.
What feels like five minutes later there’s a knock at my door. I groan and roll out of bed and am not the least bit surprised when I find Josh on the other side.
“Zander just texted saying a limo will be here to pick us up out front in two hours.”
“What! Two hours? How the hell am I going to get ready that fast? It’s not enough time!”
I go through my check list in my head of things I need to do. Shower, shave, hair, makeup, calm the fuck down.
“Ash, you’ll have plenty of time.”
“Are you a female? Did your dick somehow disappear since the last time I’ve seen it? Huh? You know nothing about how long it takes a woman to get ready for a classy event. Nothing!”
“Alright, would it help if I told you that Savvy has a team arriving soon upstairs? She said to grab your dress and whatever else you need and head upstairs.”
“I’m going to murder you and it will look like an accident Joshua Cage.”
I grab all my stuff and run for the elevators. I say a quick hello to Dante, Zander’s personal bodyguard, and barge right in their suite. I should have knocked.
I interrupt a mostly naked Savvy straddling Zander on the couch and it makes me want to gouge my eyes out. Not the half-naked Zander, but my sister from another mister. If I went my whole life without seeing how she rode cock, it would’ve been too soon.
“Jesus Christ guys!” I turn around facing the opposite direction.
“Sadly I was so close, yet now, so very far away.” Savvy says in a breathy moan.
“Can you disappear for a quick second Ash? You’re making this uncomfortable and I have some business to tend to.” Oh, Zander thinks it’s getting uncomfortable now?
“I’m going back downstairs to get ready. I’ll see you two in the limo.” I hear Savvy yell my name but I keep on going. What a whore! After what she pulled with me last night now she is going to pull this? I know these are my hormones talking when tears threaten to spill from my eyes.
I walk through the door and slam it behind me. My backs against the wall and I’m standing right next to Dante. When I look over at him he gives me a chin lift. I speak fluent macho man so I hit him with one back.
“Congrats on the baby Ash.”
I’m taken aback when he talks. I don’t think I’ve ever heard him talk.
“Thanks.” I draw out the word.
“Why are you hanging out with me in the hallway, don’t you have to get ready? We leave in an hour and a half.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. I walked in on something and let’s just say it wasn’t pretty. I’m totally lying. Zander is gorgeous, but I didn’t need to see him being ridden like a stallion with my best friend doing the dirty work.” When I get a slight chuckle from Dante it’s a win in my book.
A couple minutes pass when a flushed Savvy sprints out the door towards the elevator.
“Turn around Sav, I’m right here!” I yell before she gets too far away.
“Sorry Ash I was worried you went back downstairs. The glam squad should be here any second.”
“You were sorry, yet not sorry enough that you had me waiting out here forever while you finished Zander off?” I cross my arms over my chest and narrow my eyes.
She looks up at me shyly and I can’t contain my laughter. “Sav, you can get it in all you want with your husband, just give me some warning. That was like watching a train wreck.”
Throwing her arm around my shoulders, Savvy leads me back into their suite.
“What are you talking about, a train wreck? I have great technique and when I’m riding Zander I can get him to-”
I cut her off. “La la la la! If sex is off the table for me I can’t hear about yours. These hormones are brutal and I don’t want to be in my room later, alone, fantasizing about your husband.”
“Well you weren’t alone last night from what I hear. It’s doubtful you would fantasize about Zander when you know who is in your bed. Wait, did you make him sleep on the floor?”
“No dear Savvy, he slept in bed with me. He was so drunk off of his ass I had to take pity on him. He came in, jumped in my bed and passed out. Do you know how hard it was sleeping next to perfection last night? Even though he pissed me the hell off beforehand I’m a woman and I only have so much will power.
I notice Savvy has a weird look on her face. She moves her eyes between me and something behind me. Crap. I turn around and lock eyes with Josh.
“Josh what the…? Warn me when you’re eavesdropping or just I don’t know, block your big ears.” Truthfully, I’m mortified he heard my admission because I know he’ll use it in his arsenal to win me back.
“Sorry. I came up to check on when you girls would be ready. Zander wasn’t answering his phone.” He doesn’t look sorry at all as he gives me a sexy grin.
“That would be because the married couple decided to get a quickie in on the couch before I arrived.”
“Hey! Quick is not my style Ash.” Zander says as he enters the room.
“Thank god.” Savvy exclaims.
I roll my eyes as I grab my dress bag and tell Savvy to lead the way. We’re halfway up the stairs when I turn around and see Josh talking to Zander yet staring at my ass. When I’ve stopped my upward movements, he smiles at me and winks. I narrow my eyes and hit him with my best mean mug. Josh’s laughter fills the first floor causing me to squeeze my legs tightly together. No way, I cannot end up in bed with him again. My vagina has already forgiven him even if my heart hasn’t. Traitor.
*****
Savvy lets out a slow whistle. “Ash, you look scorching hot. No way will Josh be able to keep his hands to himself tonight.”
“Oh, he will if he knows what’s good for him. The last thing I need are his hands on me right now. His big, strong, skilled fingers. Is it hot in here? I think Zander turned the heat on.”
“Nope no heat, it’s the beginning of summer for crying out loud. I think you’re burning up due to a certain Cage brother.”
“Keep your mouth closed when I’m talking to you! You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
When I hear Savvy chuckle, I flip her the bird. I head over to the floor length mirror in the bathroom and stare at my reflection. The glam squad are miracle workers!
“Jesus they’re good. You can’t even see the bags under my eyes.” I get really close and examining my makeup nodding my head in approval. The hair dresser made me do an up do because he said I had a sexy neck.
Savvy wraps her arm around my shoulders as we stare at our reflections. Savvy looks gorgeous in a floor length purple gown. It’s light and airy and the way its draped makes her look like a Greek goddess. When she adds a kick ass necklace, it completes her look and accentuates the way her boobs look in a strapless dress.
When we were choosing dresses back at home I was going to pick something with an empire waist. Savvy convinced me to scrap that idea and I’m glad she did. I look at my floor length red gown and goosebumps cover my arms. I’m not one to toot my own horn, but I look hot. My tits are practically pouring over the top. If they are this big already, I’m excited to see their growth by the end of this pregnancy. The dress hugs my body perfectly until it flares out at the knee. My little bump is only noticeable to those that know I’m pregnant. Otherwise I look like I ate a Big Mac for lunch.
“We’re hot.” Savvy is looking at my tits in the mirror.
“Hell yes we are. Now, stop looking at my cleavage and let’s get this show on the road.”
We transfer the minimal things we can actually fit into our clutches, then head for the door. The guys will probably be angry we’re running late, but oh well. It takes time to beautify. We make our descent down the stairs as I’m expecting to hear shouts of annoyance about our lateness.
When we get to the bottom I look over towards the guys and stop in my tracks. The look Josh is giving me screams sin and Zander’s face is a mirror image as he looks at Sav. Jay and Kyle opted to go out for the night, so it’s just the four of us. I really hope this doesn’t have a double date feel to it.
Savvy clearly wasn’t paying attention because she runs right into me knocking me forward. Luckily there is an ottoman I flop on.
“Jesus Savvy!” I yell upon impact.
Strong arms swoop me up, then we’re on the move. He lifted me up so fast a boob popped out and I’m flashing the room as he walks me to the couch. Josh smells so good, but I push that thought to the side as I try to scramble and put my tit away.
“Are you okay Ash? Does anything hurt… is the baby okay?”
“I’m perfectly fine, barely fell. But thank you for giving the whole room a peep show.” I look around and notice Dante and another body guard standing in the corner of the room. Heat creeps up my face as I try to get up. Josh’s hand holds me down.
“I think we should stay home.” If he didn’t look so concerned I’d smack him. I still might.
“Are you insane? You just flashed the whole room my boob and now you want to keep me home?” He lets me up this time and everyone follows me out the door. When I get to the elevator I turn around and look at Savvy. She looks like she is going to puke.
“Seriously, I’m okay. I promise. Can we please just have fun tonight? You know I have been dying for a night out.” That’s a lie because I’m already exhausted but they don’t need to know that. Did I mention the makeup artist got rid of the bags under my eyes?
Zander’s the first to speak up. “Alright let’s do this. Guys she’ll tell us if something is wrong, right Ash?” He winks at me.
“Savvy I’m stealing your husband!”
“Get your own, bitch!”
I laugh and look over at a still concerned Josh. When I mouth “I’m fine” I’m on the receiving end of his toothy grin.
By the time we pull up to the benefit, we’re all laughing and joking around again. I’d like to say the fall is forgotten, but I know it’s not that simple with Josh. Before getting out, Zander looks at us in business mode.
“Baby, did you explain the paparazzi situation to Ash?”
“I knew I was forgetting something! Okay girl, do not give resting bitch face.” Savvy puts a polite smile on her lips and points to her face. “Literally keep your face like this for the duration of the red carpet. Believe me, you do not want to roll your eyes, yawn, sneeze or anything crazy that can be used against you.”
“Oh, and Josh, make sure you can keep your hands where everyone can see them.”
Josh holds his hands up jokingly as Zander rolls his eyes.
“Are you ever going to get over that picture baby? It looked fine.” Zander’s trying to make her feel better but I remember that picture. Now I’m trying to keep the laugh that’s threatening to release from coming out.
“Fine? It was fine? My eyes were rolled back in my head and my mouth was open. I looked like I was mid orgasm and your hand being out of view with the stupid ass grin on your face didn’t help. The head line read The Hitman’s Hands Strike Again!”
Both guys are laughing as I’m still trying to keep it in. The day she came to my house with that article in hand was the best, she was in tears and I couldn’t keep it together to console her. The picture looked every bit what she described. The poor thing.
“Okay I’ve got it, polite smile and Josh stays ten feet away. Nobody wants to talk to us simpletons anyways.”
“Wait don’t you know…” Savvy doesn’t finish her thought as the door opens. Everyone starts sliding out when what she said a few minutes ago hits me.
“Resting bitch face? Really Savvy? I do not suffer from RBF, right? You can’t do this to me the second before I walk my first red carpet!”
“Like I said, just like this.” Savvy once again puts the polite smile back on her face.
“You know you look like a stepford wife, right?”
Savvy flips me off before exiting the limo as all hell breaks loose. You wouldn’t even know it was night with all the flashes lighting up the sky. I wish that bitch told me to look down or basically anywhere but at the cameras. Blind, unable to see anything I can’t even see where to follow Savvy and Zander.
“Come on, I’ve got you.” Josh links my arm through his and starts to escort me down the red carpet.
We’re not famous so we just need to make it to the end. Well at least I thought that was the case until Josh is asked to take a few pictures. I try to make myself scarce so he can do his thing, but Josh links his fingers through mine halting my movements.
“Come on Ash.” That’s all he says before pulling my hand and somehow gracefully planting us in a pose. His hand is at the small of my back and we are facing towards each other, like we’re one of those married celebrity couples. I’m immediately annoyed. Why the hell would he do this? Everyone’s going to think we’re together.
Leaning down he whispers in my ear, “We’ll talk about this later.”
“You better believe we’ll talk about this later jackass.”
I plaster a smile on my face when I think about what Savvy said in the limo. It’s probably overkill and very toothy, but it’s better than looking like a pissed off girlfriend.
The heat from his hand through my dress is doing all sorts of things to me, mostly making me wish I wore panties. Heat creeps up my face at the thought of being aroused in front of hundreds of cameras. It sucks that Josh still has this effect on me and it annoys me even more.
We finish up and make our way past the photographers and almost make it past all the media tents when a few of them shout Josh’s name. What the hell is going on that I don’t know about? First the pictures, now the interviewers?
“Josh Cage! Josh! Can we have a quick minute of your time?” Someone with a microphone asks.
“Of course,” Josh says cool as a cucumber, like he does this every day of his life.
“What are your thoughts on Matt Kingsley calling you out?”
“It is what it is man. Matty’s a lot of talk.”
“Do you plan on taking him up on his offer? Everyone wants Rampage back in the octagon.”
“I don’t know man, we’ll see. Have a great night.”
He ushers me to the end finally and I have nothing but questions in my head. Josh fights? When did this happen and how did I not know about it?
“Ask me.” Josh states, jarring me from my thoughts.
“When did you become a fighter? Surely you didn’t shoot to stardom when we weren’t…talking.”
“You would be correct in that assumption. Technically, I’m still on the MMA roster, but a year ago, I took a beating and haven’t accepted a fight since. Zander keeps pushing me to accept, that way we can headline Vegas together in September. I’ve been busting my ass to get back into shape but I’m not sure it’s what I want anymore. With this baby on the way my priorities have shifted.”
Well hell, that shoots me right in the heart, effectively crumbling my walls a little more. Not knowing what to say for once in my life I nod my head in understanding then turn looking for Savvy and Zander. They are still at the media tents, then I remember the shit Josh pulled over there.
“Okay, so what’s with the photo op? Why would you put me in that position?”
“How could I resist having the most beautiful woman on my arm? I’m a man.”
“Not for much longer…”
We walk into the ballroom of the hotel and I can’t believe I’m actually here. This place screams money and class. You know what they say, fake it ‘til you make it and that’s what I intend on doing. But first I need to pee. I start to walk away in search of the restrooms when I feel pressure on my elbow.
“Where’re you going Ashlyn?” Josh whispers in my ear.
“Um…to pee. Is that cool with you playboy?”
Seeing the strain in his jaw I know he doesn’t like when I call him that. Oh well, it’s a joke. As I walk away I notice Josh following me. Does he expect to come in with me or something?
“Josh I think I have this covered.”
“There’s a lot of people so I’m walking you to the bathroom.”
Well okay then. When we arrive, I leave Josh in the hallway and slip into the bathroom. It’s certainly lavish. Not many bathrooms I frequent have chaise lounges in them, do people even use it? What situation would I ever be in where I need to lounge before or after doing my business? Then it clicks. How was that not my first thought? I’ve bet this thing has seen lots of action.
I’ve pondered way to long about this couch when a knock comes at the door.
“Yes?” I yell.
“Everything okay?”
I roll my eyes and proceed to unzip and shimmy my dress down my body so I can finally relieve myself. It feels like heaven every time I empty my bladder, it’s the little things in life.
“Just fine.” I shout back. I don’t need him barging through the door when my dress is around my ankles.
When I finish, I wash my hands then head back out into the hallway. I look around, but I don’t see Josh anywhere. Weird.
“Well hello beautiful.”
I look to my left and see a nicely dressed man. His features are strong, square jaw, pronounced nose, but not really my cup of tea.
“Hey.” I say hesitantly.
“Now what’s a pretty little thing like you doing here all by her lonesome?”
“Um, peeing.”
What a cheeseball. We’re standing outside the freaking bathrooms and he seems to be a few fries short of a happy meal. Maybe he’s a fighter, that would explain a lot with getting hit in the head numerous times.
“Why don’t you let me escort you back to the party? I’ll be the envy of every man in the room having the most gorgeous girl on my arm.” He winks at me and sticks his arm out.
“You’ll have to wait for that feeling because I’m all set buddy. Have a nice night.” I go to walk by him but he narrows his eyes on me then reaches out and grabs my wrist halting me. I rip my wrist from his grasp and point my finger at him.
“Don’t fucking touch me douchebag. Walk away.”
“I insist you let me escort you back into the party.” He says through gritted teeth.
“And I insist you leave me the hell alone. I’m not interested asshole.”
I hear footsteps and look over seeing Josh barreling his way towards us. Once he reaches me, he steps in front blocking the dude from my line of sight.
“What’s up Matty?” They would appear to be casually talking from an outsider stand point, but I can tell by the tone of his voice it’s anything but.
“Well if it isn’t Josh Cage. I didn’t realize they still let you into these things. They’re really lowering their standards around here.”
“Have a nice night pal.”
That’s it? He isn’t going to stick up for himself? Well if he isn’t going to…
“Shut up asshole! He-,” Josh cuts me off as Matt takes a step towards me.
“Stay away from my girl.” Josh growls out.
I’m a breath away from correcting his whole my girl statement when flashes of light catch me off guard. I look over and see a photographer little ways down the hall with his camera pointed at us.
“Still buying publicity I see. Must be horrible paying to have your picture taken. Fuck you, you’ll be getting a call from my manager.” Josh grabs my hand and starts leading me down the hall.
As we make our exit, I lift my hand in the air and flip Matt off, who is no doubt watching our retreat. God what a high! I faintly hear him talking to one of the cameras about getting Josh back into the Octagon. It’s all falling into place. This must be the guy that keeps calling him out to get back into the ring.
When we get back to our table Josh pulls out my chair and I take the seat next to Savvy.
“Where the heck have you been? They’re about to serve the food.” Savvy questions.
“Just a little mishap in the bathroom, everything’s good.”
“Did you pee your pants?”
“What? No way, why would I pee my pants?”
“I hear it’s normal with pregnancy.”
Laughter erupts from my mouth. “Where the hell are you getting your pregnancy info?”
Savvy shrugs and our food starts to get delivered to our table.
“Z, we need to talk man.” That gets everyone’s attention.
“What’s up man?”
“Not here, too many ears around. Matty cornered Ash outside the bathrooms, that should give you an idea.”
What? That explanation sounds horrible!
“Wait! You’re making it sound like I had my tongue down the dude’s throat. Nothing even close to that happened, by the way.”
Zander nods his head in understanding and I can see the tick in his jaw.
“Let’s not let that ass bag ruin our night. Let’s get a round of shots!” I look around and notice they’re all narrowing their eyes on me.
“Seriously? Obviously not me.”
Zander exits the table to get everyone a round of drinks. You’d think there would be some lackey to do that in this hoity toity party. I guess you can’t have it all.
By the time dinner is over its 9:30 and I can barely keep my eyes open. When I look over to Josh as my fifth yawn escapes my mouth, he smiles.
“Why don’t we get out of here?”
“I’ll be fine. Stay.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“Josh.” I warn.
“I’m. Coming. With. You.”
I huff and head for the bathrooms. I knock on the door and hear grunts in response. People really do bump uglies on the chaise!
“I knew it! God, I hope they are done soon. My bladder is screaming at me.” Seriously, I really need to go.
Josh walks over to the men’s room and knocks. He opens the door and looks inside before ushering me over.
“Go ahead and I’ll guard the door.”
“Thanks.” I grumble
After I shut the door I notice they don’t have a couch, or any of the other cutesy stuff the girl’s bathroom has. Makes sense. If I decided to have a quickie in a bathroom I sure as shit would not choose the men’s room.
I finish up and meet Josh back in the hallway. Thankfully this time he’s still there.
As we’re walking by the other bathroom, the door flies open and a giggling Savvy and Zander exit. Let me clarify, Savvy was giggling, Zander looks every part the man that just gave it to his woman good.
“Well, well, well. What do we have here?” Josh says.
“Don’t be jealous bro. Maybe someday Ash will let you back in her pan-… Ow, what the hell was that for?” Zander asks rubbing his nipple.
“Don’t even go there! I will pinch your other nipple.” Savvy says all business.
Zander leans down and whispers something in Savvy’s ear that causes her to blush.
“I’m going to bring Ash back to the hotel, she can barely keep her eyes open.” I roll my eyes, how chivalrous of him.
“We’ll head back with you. Is that okay babe?” Sav asks Zander.
“Yeah. I already fulfilled all of my obligations. How about you Josh?”
“All set.”
Josh places his hand at the small of my back and leads me towards the exit. As I feel all the warmth from his touch seep into my body I shiver.
“Cold?” Josh whispers in my ear.
“Nope.” I step out of his reach. He looks dejected, but he needs to know I’m not his girl.
When we get back to the hotel Josh and I exit the elevator together wishing Savvy and Zander a good night. When I get to my door I take my key card out and notice Josh hanging around. Does he want to come in or something?
“Um, I think your room is over there.”
“You don’t want to hang out, maybe watch a movie?”
“Josh…” I whisper.
“I know, when you’re ready.”
“That might be never.”
“I’ll wait forever.”