Staring across the room, watching her laugh with old friends, I felt my thirteen-year-old self succumbing to a heady infatuation. Fucking Lottie Davis. She was here. I’d heard the rumors she was in town. I hadn’t truly believed it. Not until I saw it with my own two eyes.

She hadn’t noticed me. But I noticed her as soon as she stepped through the door. She’d always had a way of grabbing my attention, even when we were kids. I sensed her presence as soon as she walked in a room. A magnetism drawing me to her like a moth to a flame.

My eyes had been glued to her all night. She was different. Not the girl I remembered. She had a sexy innocence back then. Now there was nothing innocent about her. She was still sexy as hell with her long, auburn hair, rare blue eyes and nice, toned body. The skin-tight jeans and fitted top she wore revealed every one of her beautiful curves. Every man in the bar was watching her, wanting to take her home. And it irritated the hell out of me that their eyes were on her. The same way mine were, visualizing her with only those heels on.

I wasn’t sure if I was more relieved or more pissed Billy Miller had been by her side the whole night, keeping her away from all the horny bastards in the bar. Billy had a thing for her for the longest time, but she’d been mine. As far as I knew, he’d never made a pass at her before now. He was probably thrilled about finally getting the chance at making his teenage wet dreams come true.

I snuck another glance over my shoulder to look at her. She knew I was here now. After our eyes locked earlier, she almost fell to the ground from the shock of seeing me.

My muscles tensed once again as I watched Billy lean closer to whisper something in her ear, making her laugh.

Damn it.

I needed to stop watching her—them. Every time his hand touched a part of her body, I had to fight back the jealous rage coursing through me. It wasn’t doing my sanity any good. She didn’t belong to me anymore. Not sure she ever really had. She made that pretty clear the day she left town without even a goodbye.

She’d been the center of my universe since I was ten. And then she was gone, leaving me with nothing but a broken heart and fucking confused head. I knew that night something was off with her. To this day, I still don’t know why she left the way she did. I should have pressed her harder. I had so many regrets from that night for so many years. And seeing her again was bringing it all back.

* * *

Twelve years ago…

I stared in my rear-view mirror as I drove away, looking back at Lottie as she stood on her front porch, her arms clinging to her stomach with a pained, watery gaze. I had no idea what was putting it there. It killed me she wasn’t telling me. She’d always been honest with me. We didn’t lie to each other. I hoped she truly was just tired, and I was only misinterpreting her mood.

I wanted to flip the truck back around, climb in her window, and spend the night holding her. Something told me I should, but I didn’t want to smother her. She was obviously dealing with something she didn’t want my help with. If I couldn’t be with her, I wanted to go home. But with the party still going on in my family’s field, I was forced to go back and make sure nothing crazy happened.

A bunch of drunken underage teens playing with fire could easily lead to terrible shit. My father would have my hide if any crops got burned, especially right before harvest. And I didn’t need the old man on my ass more than he already was.

I backed my truck into the spot it was earlier. I put it in park and then got out, headed straight for the keg where my buddies were still standing. Derek had poured me a drink by the time I approached.

“Did you get Lottie Dottie tucked in all tight?” he teased, handing me the cup. “She must have been all ‘tuckered’ out.”

“Ha-ha. Fuck you, man,” I growled, taking the cup from his hand. I was in no mood for his shit or anyone else’s. Lottie was still weighing heavily on my mind. Derek laughed, shaking his head before turning to carry on his conversation with Jimmy and Aaron.

Leighton gave me a knowing look from across the circle. My eyes narrowed as I stared at her. Maybe she knew what was going on with Lottie. That would make fucking one of us. I tried to listen to my buddies as they talked about random crap, but the nagging feeling in my gut wouldn’t go away. If I couldn’t get an answer out of Lottie, maybe I could out of Leighton.

I stared at Leighton, trying to silently get her attention. When she finally looked my way, taking her eyes from Aaron, I nodded my head back toward my truck. I turned and walked away, hoping she understood to follow me.

I got into the cab of my truck, waiting for her to join me. The passenger door opened and Abby Taylor slid into the seat next to me.

What the hell was she doing?

“Hey, Tuck”—she smiled—“you look like you could use some company.”

“Thanks for your concern, Abby, but I’m good. You can leave.”

Abby had always been a bitch to Lottie, and I knew it was purely out of jealousy. Sure, Abby was a pretty girl, but she didn’t compare to Lottie. And she made a point to make Lottie’s life miserable as the head cheerleader and lead mean girl in school.

Her hand glided across my thigh, apparently taking my response as an invitation rather than the blatant dismissal it was. I clutched her wrist, stopping her movement.

“Don’t fucking touch me, Abby. You know I’m with Lottie,” I warned, removing her hand from my leg.

She jerked her wrist from my grasp. “You mean Lottie Dottie…the one who likes to potty in her pants,” she mocked.

“She was a kid when it happened, Abby. Call her that one more damn time, and I’ll make your life a living hell.”

Abby had never let Lottie live that embarrassing accident down, branding her with the nickname Lottie Dottie, who likes to potty. She was four at the time. Abby made sure that moment followed her for the next fourteen years.

The passenger door opened once again. This time Leighton stood there staring at the two of us. Shit. I hoped she wouldn’t misconstrue what was truly going on here. Leighton’s eyes narrowed as an evil smile slithered across Abby’s face. Motherfucker. She better not say something happened between us.

“Out,” I growled at Abby.

She feigned offense with pouty lips as she gave me one final look before sliding out of the truck. Pushing past Leighton, she purposely knocked her shoulder. Leighton watched her walk away before turning her eyes back to me.

“It’s not what you think. I didn’t—”

She threw the palm of her hand up, stopping my explanation. “You don’t need to say anything, Tuck. We both know what a bitch Abby is. She’s been after you from the beginning. Anything to hurt Lottie.”

I nodded, hoping that meant Leighton trusted I would never do that to Lottie. She climbed into the cab with me, shutting the door.

“I’m sorry, Tuck.”

“For what, Leighton?”

Her big, brown eyes turned to look at me, a surprised expression twisting her face. “She didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what, Leighton?”

“Nothing.” She shook her head. “It’s not my place, Tucker. I won’t get in the middle…if she didn’t tell you when you dropped her off, then I hope she does sooner than later. Or maybe she changed her mind.”

I never knew what the hell Leighton was talking about until it was too late.

* * *

“Tuck, man, are you even listening to us?” Jimmy’s voice pulled me back to the present.

“What?” I asked, my eyes looking up from my beer to find Derek and Jimmy both staring at me expectantly.

“Shit, Tucker. I figured after twelve years you wouldn’t be so hard up for her still.” Derek smirked, shaking his head in disbelief before taking a sip of his beer.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“You and Lottie. You’ve been staring at her all night, man. Stop acting like a fucking creeper and just go talk to her.”

“Shut up, man. I haven’t been staring at her.”

They both laughed at my lie.

“I heard she’s looking for a contractor. Maybe you could offer to help her out… You know, a way to break the ice,” Jimmy suggested as if I were a pubescent teen who had no idea how to talk to a fucking woman.

I ignored him, taking a sip of my own beer.

“You spent years wanting a chance to find out what happened. Now you’re just gonna throw it away?” Jimmy continued to try to convince me to make a move.

“Right… Well, I guess if you’re not interested, then maybe I’ll take a shot. That is if Billy hasn’t already called dibs. She’s hotter than I remembered. Lottie Dottie is all grown up.” A sly grin tugged at Derek’s lips as he eyed her over my shoulder.

“Keep the hell away from her,” I growled, slamming my beer back down, pushing away from the table. I glared at my friends and walked away.

I knew I overreacted. Derek was only messing with me, stirring shit up. He would never actually take a shot at Lottie. He and Jimmy had been my best friends since we were six years old. They knew what her disappearing act had done to me. They stood by me through some of my worst days—years. They were the ones who finally got through to me, kicking my ass out of the darkness. With the support of Grams and my younger sister, Jamie, they helped me to heal from the devastation of Lottie’s disappearance.

I stomped toward the back exit near the restrooms. I needed some fucking air. A minute to get my shit together. I shouldn’t have blown up at my friends. But seeing her had me spinning with an uncontrollable anger. I wanted to walk up to her and demand an explanation. I wanted to rip her away from Billy and claim her as mine. Fucking shit. Thinking about burying myself between her legs was not helping.

I pushed through the door, letting it slam against the wall before it fell closed again. I roughly rubbed my hands over my face as I took a few deep breaths, hoping they’d calm me. I knew I should just leave. Get in my truck and drive the fuck away from here. From her.

I didn’t need to be out all night anyway. I had responsibilities now. Someone who needed me. Someone I was committed to. Talking to Lottie was only going to complicate things. But damn it. I needed some fucking answers. Answers I’d been desperate to hear for years. I took another deep inhale and then walked back through the door.

I hadn’t taken more than four steps back inside when I felt the familiar spark in the air. I looked up as she came out of the restroom, giggling with Leighton. She stopped in the hallway, staring back at me. Leighton followed suit. The two of them had always been thick as thieves. It seemed that bond hadn’t been broken. The three of us stood there… Well, I stood. The two of them were obviously drunk as hell and swaying more than anything.

“I’ll give you two a minute.” Leighton broke the strained silence. She gave Lottie’s arm a squeeze and then walked away.

Lottie took a few staggering steps toward me before planting her back on the wall with a defeated sigh. She took a few deep breaths with her eyes closed, steeling herself. She rotated her body to face me, still leaning against the wall for support. I wasn’t sure if it was for physical or emotional support. Maybe both.

“How ya been, Tuck?” she finally spoke, her voice like a seductive dominatrix as it rolled across my body, demanding my cock to attention.

Fuck. I was screwed.

“Really, Lottie? That’s how you want to start this conversation? How the hell do you think I’ve been?”

I took a couple steps toward her, slowly, predatorily. My body wanting to be closer to hers. Itching to feel the heat of her skin and the softness of her curves below my hands.

“I don’t know, Tuck. That’s why I’m asking. What else do you want me to say?”

Her breath caught as my body stopped a foot from hers. A sign she was just as impacted by my presence as I was by hers. I leaned against the wall, crossing my arms against my chest to keep myself from reaching out and pulling her into me. I was close enough I could smell her. She smelled like fucking heaven, making me want to believe she was an angel. It was a trick. I knew she was the devil in disguise.

“How ’bout you finally tell me why,” I demanded more than suggested, putting her on the spot.

I’d never been harsh with Lottie. Not to say we didn’t have some fights back in the day, but at least then I knew we’d make up. I wasn’t so sure how this conversation was going to end.

“It doesn’t matter, Tuck.” She abruptly ripped her eyes from mine. The same way she’d ripped my heart from my chest. “It was a long time ago,” she whispered as she continued to stare blankly at the wall on the other side of the hallway.

She was fighting her own desire. Her rapid breathing and the blush tinting her paler than normal skin gave her away. Wherever she’d been living, she wasn’t getting out in the sun much. The thought seemed contradicting to the girl I once knew. She’d always been outside running around on the farm. Maybe she’d changed. Or maybe I never really knew her at all. I should have seen back then she was as wild and free as the horse she rode. Nobody would ever tame her. Yet, I was the fool who tried.

I did know one thing, though. She wanted me as badly as I wanted her. And if she didn’t want to talk, then I’d get the one other thing I needed from her right then. I gently gripped her jaw with my thumb and fingers, forcing her to look at me. She let out a breathy gasp at my touch, reminding me of the noises she made when she came.

I leaned in, brushing my lips against the shell of her ear, forcing myself not to press them against her soft, luscious mouth. I wasn’t giving in before she did. I couldn’t let her have the upper hand. She’d had it for too many damn years.

“Let’s get out of here, Lottie,” I whispered, pressing my body into hers. It felt damn good and painful all at once.

Her pulse throbbed as rapidly as mine against my fingers at the base of her neck. I knew everything I was doing was wrong. She was drunk. I would never take advantage of her. But I couldn’t help at least trying to get her to agree I could take her home, so I knew she was safe.

“That’s not a good idea,” she breathed, still fighting against the urge. She’d always been a fighter. Strong as hell and independent as fuck. I loved and hated that about her all at the same time.

“We both know you’re gonna leave anyway, why not fuck each other and get it out of our systems? You still owe me after all. You made me a promise that last night in my truck.”

I knew it was a dick thing to say, even before I felt her flinch from my challenge. But the woman had me fighting to retain control. I couldn’t seem to restrain the anger I’d held onto for so many years.

“Screw you, Tuck.” She pulled away, glaring at me.

I didn’t relent. When she pushed off my chest to step away, I snatched both of her wrists, holding her hands pressed against me. I was going to break down the damn wall she’d built between us.

“That’s what I’m hoping for.” I smirked. “Don’t forget, Lottie, I know your body. I was the first to explore it. The first to memorize it. You can’t hide from me anymore, baby.”

I knew I was pushing her. It was a dangerous game. But I didn’t care. I had one head screaming no, while the other screamed yes. And my hard as hell cock was winning. I was two seconds away from slamming my lips to hers.

“Wow.” She shook her head with disappointment in her eyes, her voice sharp as she took a step away from me, yanking her wrists from my hold. “A cheater. What happened to you, Tucker?”

My jaw ticked as my eyes narrowed with my tensing body, her words a shock to my system. Anger coursed through the blood in my veins like a liquid nitrous.

How the hell could she even ask me that? Let alone accuse me of being a fucking cheater. Is that why she left? She thought I’d cheated on her. It was bullshit. I never touched Abby Taylor that night. I didn’t even bother to give her accusation a response. If she thought for a minute I’d ever cheat on her, she didn’t realize how much I’d loved her.

“You,” I gritted my one-word response through clenched teeth. It was all the explanation she was getting from me. It was more than she ever bothered to give.

I turned my back on her the way she had on me twelve years ago and walked away. Fuck this shit. I ignored every part of me telling me to go back, particularly the one part demanding me to take her up against the wall. I had enough shit to deal with. I wasn’t about to let her work her way back into my life, even for a quick fuck.

I continued my determined stride to the exit, only stopping when guilt wracked my body, halting my progression. Shit. I was a damn asshole. No matter what she’d done, she didn’t deserve how I acted. I threaded my fingers through my hair, guilt shifting to worry. I couldn’t let her drive home. I turned around, changing course, headed to the table she’d been at all night.

When I approached her friends, their chatter fell silent as they all looked up at me. Lottie hadn’t rejoined them yet.

“Tucker,” Billy greeted me with uneasiness in his eyes, his body guarded. I’m sure he thought I was there to beat his ass. I wanted to, but I wouldn’t.

“Are you good, Billy?”

He shifted in his seat, the lump in his throat visible as he swallowed hard. “Sure.”

“To drive, Billy. Are you good to drive?”

His body relaxed as he comprehended what I was asking. “Yeah, man. I can drive. I’ll make sure she gets home safe.”

I nodded once before turning to leave.

* * *

I pulled up to the house, shutting off the headlights so they wouldn’t shine through the windows and wake my girl. I rubbed a hand roughly down my face—pissed, frustrated, and more stressed than I was when I first arrived at Dudley’s. I hadn’t been out in months, and the stress of running my own construction business was a daily beating. We were busy as shit. And tonight was supposed to be about me alleviating some stress while hanging out with my buddies.

I let out a heavy sigh, shutting off the ignition. I walked toward the old, small farmhouse, climbing the steps. The door creaked as I slowly opened it, creeping into the dark as quietly as possible. The living room lamp flicked on, scaring the crap out of me.

“What the hell, Grams?” I whisper-yelled at the old woman resting in the recliner next to the lamp. “Why are sitting in the dark?” I rotated, closing and locking the door behind me.

“I wasn’t sitting in the dark. I was sleeping until my grandson decided to sneak in like a burglar.”

“I was trying to be quiet, so I didn’t wake you or Lily.”

“Well, a lotta good that did. You were as loud as a peacock during breeding season.”

I cracked a smile. Grams could always make my bad moods disintegrate like magic. She’d been my rock for years, even before my mother had passed away when I was barely eight.

“You sleeping all night in that recliner?”

“Nah, I’ll make it to my bed eventually.”

I’d offer her some help, but I knew it would only offend her. “All right then. Good night, Grams.” I bent down, giving her a kiss on her weathered cheek.

“Night, Tuck.”

I could feel her eyes on me, and I wondered if she could read my mind like she always had. If she could, she was too tired to force me to talk about it. She knew Lottie was in town. She was the one who’d told me the news. I wouldn’t be surprised if somehow she got word we were both at Dudley’s tonight.

I walked softly down the hall, slowly pushing the door to Lily’s room open. She’d already managed to turn herself sideways in the bed, covers twisted haphazardly, her brown hair splayed across the floral sheet of the mattress.

She was the one good thing in my life. Besides my Grams, of course. I reclosed the door, leaving it cracked open in case she woke in the middle of the night with one of her nightmares. They came less often these days, but I still made sure I could hear her if she cried out.

I made the rest of the trek down the hall to the guest bedroom. The room I’d stayed in many nights growing up when I needed distance from my father. I pulled my shirt over my head, kicking off my boots before falling onto the old, squeaky mattress. I closed my eyes, hoping the alcohol in my body was enough to knock me out sooner than later, so I could evade all thoughts of Lottie.