I stumbled sleepily into the kitchen, squinting as I went, shielding my eyes as the harsh, bright light of the morning sun poured through the kitchen windows. I needed coffee. Desperately. And if I didn’t get it soon, I would not be liable for the future murders that may be committed in Greene County.

I searched through the creaky cabinets for the object of my desire, finally discovering the red can of coffee grounds only to realize there were no filters to be found.

“You’ve got to be freaking kidding me,” I grumbled as I slammed the now useless can next to the ancient coffee maker. I don’t know why I expected anything to go my way. That hadn’t happened since the moment David proposed. Maybe this was karma’s way of kicking me in the ass. I just wished it would cut me some slack and give me a damn minute to get up from the floor. Talk about kicking a girl when she’s down.

As I started my verbal assault on the innate object, a light knock sounded on the front door. I peered over my shoulder toward the living room, wondering who the hell could be here at the butt crack of dawn.

Nobody knew I was in town except for Mr. Daniels. Well, and Mrs. Covington. Oh, and Billy. Crap. Who was I kidding? Half of Greene County probably knew I was back in town at this point. It had been over twelve hours since I’d arrived and word around here traveled faster than a hot knife through butter.

I cinched my silk robe tighter around my body as I walked toward the front door, the person on the other side rapping once again. Flinging the door open, a wave of fresh coffee and sweet, baked goods hit my nose in greeting.

Thank. You. Dear. Lord.

“God, that smells amazing.” I drooled, focusing on the white paper sack and coffees being held by tiny, feminine hands. For once, I was glad the people in Billingsley knew no boundaries. This was one unannounced visit I could forgive.

“So, Billy wasn’t messing with me. You’re really back.”

I looked up at Leighton’s big, brown eyes that were wide with shock. “Is that for me?” I asked hopefully.

I could hug her for the mere fact she showed up with coffee and pastries from Ida’s Bakery. Her timing was impeccable. I thought I was going to have to MacGyver that shit in order to get a cup of coffee.

“Depends.” She shifted to a hip, angling her head to the side. “Are you going to invite me in and tell me where the hell you’ve been hiding for the last twelve years?”

“Leigh, you tell me that’s my favorite maple pecan latte from Ida’s, and I’ll tell you anything you want.”

Even after living in the coffee capital for the last decade, nothing compared to Ida’s coffee.

She grinned.

I smiled back, opening the door wider, stepping aside to allow her to pass. I followed behind her into the kitchen. Leighton knew the house as well as I did, having spent as much time here as her own home. After she set the bag and coffees on the eat-in table, she turned to face me. She stared at me all of two seconds before engulfing me in a strong embrace.

“I can’t believe you’re really here,” she whispered, like if she spoke too loudly I might disappear.

I hugged her back, my body relaxing, the tension I didn’t realize was even there lifting. She released me, stepping back to give us both some space.

“When did you get in town?”

“Yesterday afternoon.”

She looked around the house, my eyes traveling the same path as hers, taking in the scene together. “This place is still the same.”

I nodded, silently agreeing. Mom hadn’t changed anything in the last twelve years. In the last thirty years for that matter. When I walked through the front door yesterday, it was like I’d never left. The same old furniture and knick-knacks littered the rooms. Even my bedroom was exactly how I left it. As if everything had been frozen in time.

The brown, shaggy carpet I despised and the beige linoleum still covered the floors. I planned on replacing it all in order to sell the house, along with upgrading the kitchen, bathrooms, and doing a fresh coat of paint inside and out.

“But you’re not the same.” Her eyes traveled back to me. “I mean, you’re still beautiful, but damn…you look like a freaking movie star, Lottie.”

Swiping a few stray hairs from my face, I laughed uncomfortably. Finding it odd she was complimenting me on my appearance when I had bed head and pajamas on. Billingsley residents had little to compare me against.

I stepped past her, taking a seat at the table. If we were going to have this unexpected reunion, I was going to need that coffee.

“Thanks, Leighton. But you don’t have to lie. I’m a hot mess right now.”

She sat down with me, pulling out a cinnamon roll for each of us as I slid the other coffee to her.

“I’m sorry about your mom, Lottie.”

I met her genuine eyes, giving her a half nod and slight smile of gratitude.

“And I’m not lying. I’d die to look that good rolling out of bed.” She chuckled.

The lyrical sound made my smile widen as I realized how much I’d missed our friendship. How much I missed her. And not only because she was complimenting me. Leighton had always been a great friend. Our friendship had been easy and natural from the start. It didn’t surprise me how after not talking for years, we were picking up right where we’d left off.

We visited and laughed as we caught up, eating our cinnamon rolls and drinking our lattes. I filled her in on my life and career in Seattle, and she told me how she’d married Aaron Bradley, her brother’s best friend and the guy she’d crushed on all through high school. The hours slipped by quickly and before I knew it, it was approaching noon.

“Billy says you don’t plan on staying long.”

“No,” I replied, dropping my eyes, suddenly feeling like my leaving would be letting her down. “I need to get back to Seattle. I only took the week off for the memorial and to get this place ready to sell… Though, now that I’m seeing it, I’m wondering if it’ll even be possible.”

“I’ve never known you to fail at anything you put your mind to. Plus”—she shrugged a shoulder—“you have me. And I know Billy will be more than happy to help you out with anything you need.”

“Thanks, Leigh. That means a lot to me.”

“Oh, don’t think I’m offering without getting anything in return.” She grinned slyly. “I’m not that nice.”

I laughed. “And what is it you want from me?”

“You have to come out with us tonight. We’re going to Dudley’s for a few beers and some dancing.”

“I don’t know, Leigh.” I peered back at my coffee, avoiding her hopeful expression once again. Going out where I could potentially run into more people from my past was not something I wanted to do.

“Come on! You have to! It’ll be good for you. Sitting around this house alone is not what you need right now. And like I said, it’s the only way I’ll help you pack up all this junk. Just look around. It could take you months without my help,” she teased.

I shook my head as I chuckled. “Fine. I’ll go out with you tonight.”

“Yes!” She threw her arm over her head in an exaggerated victory dance.

We both stood from the table, walking toward the front door. I followed her outside, standing on the porch with her.

“You want us to pick you up?”

“I’ll meet you there.”

“You’re not going to bail on me and skip town, are you?” Her eyes narrowed playfully.

“Ouch. Solid burn, Leigh. I wasn’t planning on it, but I may now,” I teased in return.

“Hey, if the Jimmy Choo fits,” she goaded me some more before giving me a hug goodbye.

“I’m impressed you even know the designer,” I gibed, the corner of my lip twitching with a smile.

“How could I not? Most of our childhood was spent pouring over fashion magazines.”

We both smiled fondly at the memory.

As she turned to leave, my voice stopped her. “Hey, Leigh…I’m sorry.”

She looked back at me, her eyes soft and sincere. “There’s nothing to apologize for, Lottie. The phone works both ways. Our lives just went different directions, but I’m glad our paths have crossed again. Maybe this time, we’ll do better at staying in touch.”

“I hope so. I missed you.”

“Missed you too, Lottie. See ya tonight. Be there by nine or I’m hunting you down,” she warned with a pointed finger before she descended the unstable steps headed for her SUV. I waved from the porch as she drove away.

Stepping back in the house, I looked around at the task ahead of me. A surprising nostalgia drifted over me. For a spilt moment, I had second thoughts about selling. I shook it off quickly, though, knowing it was probably spawned from spending my morning reminiscing with Leighton. There was no way I could keep the house. My life was in Seattle. Not Billingsley.

* * *

“Seriously! Three months before you could even start? You have to be kidding me.” I dropped my forehead into the palm of my hand as the other clenched the phone tighter. A stress headache on the precipice. The punches just kept coming.

“Sorry, miss. We’re backed up on other job sites until then. I wish I could help you sooner, but my crews are already working overtime to stay on top of the jobs we have.”

“No, I understand.” I didn’t. How was it possible every contractor in Greene County was too busy to take on the remodel of my house immediately?

Apparently, there was massive growth happening in Texas. Many people flocking to the large state for better jobs, cheaper living, and more space. I was the only one wanting to hightail it out of there once again.

“If your project timeline changes, I’m happy to do the work.”

“Thanks.” For nothing—I wanted to add, but bit my tongue and hung up the phone. The universe hated me. And it sucked to admit I probably deserved it.

I slouched in my chair at the kitchen table, crossing off the last potential contractor I’d found on the Internet. Well…there was one more, but I wasn’t about to contact him.

I closed my laptop and stood. I needed a drink more than ever. A night at Dudley’s with Leighton sounded more appealing than it had this morning.

I showered, hoping the bad streak of luck I’d been having would follow the water down the drain. I took my time getting ready, wishing my mother had kept alcohol in the house. She made it a point to never have it around after my father left. Once I was dressed, my thick, red curls straightened and my makeup plastered on, I grabbed my keys and set out for Dudley’s.

* * *

The gravel parking lot crunched below my high-heeled sandals. As I neared the entrance of the metal shack known as Dudley’s, muffled music seeped through its walls. I dried my sweaty palms, wiping them down the sides of my skinny jeans, taking a deep breath before swinging the door open and walking inside.

The smell of smoke and stale liquor immediately invaded my nose as my eyes focused in the dim bar. With the minimal lighting and the massive amount of townsfolk crowding the space, it took me a moment to spot Leighton. She’d thankfully stood from her stool, waving her arms in the air like a mad woman to get my attention.

She was at a bar height table, sitting with Aaron and Billy. I smiled, my body relaxing, relieved they were the only ones I seemed to recognize in the bar. The last thing I needed was to run into anyone else, especially the two people from my past I dreaded seeing the most. Keeping my eyes trained on Leighton, I made my way through the crowded space to their table.

“Hey! You came!” Leighton jumped me with a hug as soon as I was three feet from the table.

I laughed at her enthusiastic greeting. “I told you I would.”

“It’s almost nine. I thought maybe you’d changed your mind, and I was gonna have to hunt you down.”

I narrowed my eyes playfully, shaking my head.

“You look hot. I love that top. And those shoes! How on earth do you manage to wear those things?” She looked at them in mock horror as she admired them.

“You get used to them.” I shrugged, glancing down at our feet. Leighton had on a cute pair of cowgirl boots that were made for dancing. Boots were a staple in Billingsley. Most residents had two or three pairs—at least one for working the farm, one for dancing, and one for church.

My sight was pulled back to eye-level when a strong arm wrapped around my shoulders, a delicious, woodsy male cologne surrounding me.

“Hey, Lottie, glad to see you haven’t injured yourself in the last twenty-four hours.” Billy grinned, hugging me into his side as he planted a kiss on my cheek.

“Well, not yet. Don’t jinx me, Billy. My luck is bad enough lately.”

“Rough day?”

“You could say that…or more like a rough couple of weeks.”

“Sounds like you could use a drink. You still a Miller girl?”

“More of a Merlot woman than a Miller girl now.” I returned a flirty smile.

“I guess some things have changed. But you’re still a knockout, Lottie.” He winked as he took a couple steps backward toward the bar to retrieve my drink. The perusal he gave my body sent a blush to my cheeks. His teeth tugged at his bottom lip and then he turned, disappearing through the crowd.

I rotated my head to face Leighton once again. Her eyebrow arched, nearly reaching the hairline of her brown locks. I shook my head in response to her silent question. I wasn’t interested in Billy that way. He was one good-looking guy, but I had no intentions of getting involved with anyone while I was in town. Though, I couldn’t deny the attention he was giving me felt nice.

We both took a seat at the table with Aaron, who gave me a nod and a subdued hello. We made small talk until Billy returned with my glass of wine, filling the empty seat next to me, his arm finding a place around the back of my chair.

The screen of my phone illuminated with a new incoming text, drawing my eyes to where it sat in front of me on the table.

D: We should talk. Call me.

I cleared the message from my screen, refraining from rolling my eyes as I ignored the text from David. There was no way I was dealing with him at the moment. I glanced back up, finding Billy’s inquisitive eyes on me. He’d obviously seen the text.

“Did you find someone to fix up the house for you?” Leighton asked, unknowingly interrupting our silent exchange as she took a sip of her beer.

I sighed, shaking my head as I spun the stem of my glass. “No. Apparently there isn’t a contractor available in Greene County for at least three months. And I have no intention on waiting that long.”

“What’s the rush?” Aaron asked.

I shrugged. “I just…I need to get it off my plate. I don’t have time to worry about it in the future. I’m constantly busy at work, and I travel a lot.”

I didn’t give them the real answer. I needed to cut ties with the place sooner than later. I didn’t want any reason to be forced to come back to this town after the week was over. It held too many painful memories. Too many ghosts.

“I’m sure Billy would be happy to help out,” Leighton volunteered her brother.

“Sure. I already told you to let me know what you need. I plan to stop by this week to fix the steps on the porch for you. Put a list together, and I’ll help where I can.”

“Thank you, Billy.” I glanced up at him and he smiled back at me.

“No problem.” He squeezed his arm around me, giving me a kiss to my temple.

We all continued to chat about our lives, laughing and telling stories about our past and the past twelve years we’d been separated.

By the fourth round of drinks and a couple of dances around the concrete floor with Billy, I insisted on buying a round for the table. Billy and Aaron had paid for all the others and though I appreciated it, I wasn’t one of those women who expected the men to always pay.

Leighton followed closely behind me on our path to the bar, having volunteered to help me carry the beers back to the table. I was laughing at something she’d said when my eyes caught his. My footsteps faltered before freezing completely, the whole world standing still. The only thing audible was the blood rushing in my ears.

Leighton slammed into me from behind, my body stumbling forward. Mere seconds before I hit the floor, strong arms caught me. I steadied myself with the help of the gentleman nearby who’d saved me from a very embarrassing fall.

“You okay, sweetheart?” he asked.

“Yeah. Sorry,” I apologized, tearing my gaze from the man who’d caught my attention to look at the man who’d caught me. “Thank you.”

“No problem.” He grinned as he looked me over with hungry eyes.

“What the hell, Lottie?” Leighton slurred from behind me, thankfully interrupting us before the man could ask to buy me a drink.

“Sorry,” I muttered, tugging at her arm to pull her away from where we’d collided and up to the bar.

We both leaned against the wooden rail, flagging down the bartender. I tried to inconspicuously glance over my shoulder to find those green eyes that had haunted me for so long. Despite being slightly intoxicated, Leighton didn’t miss a beat. Or maybe I wasn’t as discreet with my spying as I’d thought, being a bit inebriated myself.

“What are you looking at?” She looked over her own shoulder to follow my gaze. “Oh. Shit.”

Oh, shit was right.

Fucking Tucker Monroe. Billingsley’s golden boy. Town heartthrob. All-star high school quarterback and all-around athlete. Every guy wanted to be him, every girl wanted him…but only one girl ever had his attention growing up—his high school sweetheart. She wasn’t the homecoming queen or the head cheerleader, like most would’ve expected. But she was his. Everyone knew they’d be the one high school couple who married someday. But they didn’t. Because that girl left him, taking the heart he so freely gave her and stomping on it—that girl was me.

I continued to sneak glances at him from across the room. He was at a table full of his old friends, women eyeing them, trying to work up the nerve to intrude the tight-knit clan of Adonises. He was more gorgeous than the vision etched in my memory.

He’d grown up. He was no longer the teenage boy I’d recalled. He was all man from head to toe. Even though he was seated across the room, I could tell he was built to perfection—the muscles evident from the way his shirt hugged his arms and chest. He still had that killer smile that made my heart stumble, and the chestnut-colored hair that was the perfect length to run my fingers through. Not too long, but not too short. I had to refrain from letting out a dreamy sigh as the memories caused a flutter in my belly.

I hadn’t seen or talked to him in twelve years. But I knew he was engaged and now belonged to another woman. Mom had made a special call just to let me know the news. I had no idea who the lucky woman was. I’d shut the conversation down before she had the chance to tell me. I didn’t want to know. Simply hearing he’d moved on made my gut twist. I had no right to feel that way—the aching heart, the jealousy, the devastation. But I’m the first to admit how selfish I could be.

* * *

Twelve years ago…

“What’s wrong, babe?” Tucker squeezed his arms tighter around my body that was nestled between his legs. We sat on the tailgate of his truck, watching our friends do keg stands in the distance.

“Nothing. Just thinking.”

“’Bout what?”

“The future.” It wasn’t a lie, even though it felt like one. I could feel the smile on his lips as he pressed a kiss to the back of my head, making me only feel worse.

“I’m gonna get another beer. You want one?”

“Sure.” I nodded blandly.

He shifted backward into the truck bed, untangling our bodies. Leaving me by myself, he strutted confidently toward the rest of our group where they circled around the bonfire and keg.

We were celebrating my high school graduation, along with some of our classmates, in one of the fields on the Monroe farm. Trucks and cars were randomly parked with drunken teenagers milling around them. I watched Tucker on his way to refill his cup. He was stopped by a group of his friends from his graduating class the year before. His sexy smile overtook his face as he laughed at something his buddy, Derek, said.

Leighton appeared at my side, climbing onto the tailgate next to me. She leaned against me, resting her head on my shoulder. I laid my own head over hers as we both stared straight ahead at our crazy friends and classmates that we’d known our whole lives.

“I can’t believe you’re leaving tomorrow.” She sighed her sadness.

I only responded by linking my arm through my best friend’s as if somehow it would ensure our bond for the future. I stared in the dark distance where the fire flickered against the faces of my classmates. The bright stars were the only other source of light as music played from the speakers of Billy’s truck parked a few cars down from Tucker’s.

“I’m guessing by his good mood, you haven’t told him yet.”

“No,” I answered reluctantly. She was the only person I’d told other than my mother.

“When?”

I didn’t answer.

“Lottie.” She lifted her head to look at me, forcing me to lift mine. “You’re gonna tell him, right? You leave in less than twelve hours.”

“I know that, Leigh.”

Before I could say more, Tucker returned with two red plastic cups filled to the rim. “You two okay over here? You look way too serious for a couple girls celebrating their new freedom.”

“Yeah. We’re good.” I took one of the cups from his hand after giving Leighton a warning glare.

“Sure.” She forced a smile, jumping down from her spot on the tailgate. “Thanks for the beer.” Her grin turned mischievous as she stole the other cup from Tucker’s hand.

Tucker chuckled, shaking his head in amusement as Leighton walked away. He took the last few steps to me, nudging my legs apart so he could stand between them. The palms of his hands cradled my face as he studied my eyes. “Lottie, you sure you’re okay? I can tell something’s been bothering you all night. Talk to me, babe.”

I tore my eyes from his, staring down at the cheap beer in the cheap, red cup. “I’m fine, Tuck. I think I’m just tired from the events today. Will you take me home?” I looked back up at him, hating myself for lying to him for the first time ever.

He studied me in silence, then planted a firm kiss on my lips. Intertwining his fingers with mine, he helped me down from the truck, closing the tailgate. We said goodbye to our friends before climbing into the cab and driving away, leaving everyone to carry on partying until the early morning hours.

I was pressed against Tucker’s side on the bench seat of his truck as he shifted it into park in front of my house. He put his arm around me as I nuzzled my face deeper into his chest. Inhaling him. Memorizing his scent. Branding his touch into my skin.

Out of everyone in Billingsley, he was the one person I would miss the most. The one person I’d regret leaving. But he was also the one person who could potentially make me regret staying.

“What’s going on with you, Lottie? I have this feeling in my gut. Something’s not right.”

I lifted my head to his concerned eyes, holding back the tears that were threatening in mine. I inched up higher, pressing my lips to his, needing to taste him one last time.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue sweeping inside my mouth. I moaned as he pulled me onto his lap, my legs straddling his as my back pressed against the steering wheel. I rocked my hips, my body begging for more.

For once, I was thankful my jeans were a barrier between us, only making it more difficult for him to give me what I truly wanted but couldn’t take right then. If he’d claimed me in that moment—like I wanted—filling my body with his, connecting us once again, there would be no way I could do what I had to do.

His hands glided up my thighs, slipping under my shirt as one found purchase on my breast and the other reached around my back for the clasp of my bra. I broke the kiss, pulling away from him.

“I should go inside. Mom’s light is still on. She’s waiting up for me.”

“Since when have you cared about that?” He smirked, his green eyes gleaming in the moonlight.

I smacked his chest playfully, a grin tugging at my lips. “Another time,” I added my second lie to the list, crawling from his lap, pulling my shirt back down to cover my stomach.

I moved from his side, sliding across the seat to leave when he pulled me back to him. He slammed his lips to mine, kissing me once more.

“I’m going to hold you to that, Lottie,” he teased as he pulled his lips from mine. “I love you.”

I swallowed the pain lodged in my throat as my chest tightened. “I love you too, Tuck.”

That wasn’t a lie. I knew since we were kids Tucker Monroe was the only man I’d ever truly love. It was the reason I had to leave and never look back. Our eyes remained locked as I told him a silent goodbye. One I would never say out loud. If I did, he’d try to talk me out of it. And he’d succeed, so I couldn’t give him the opportunity.

I wasn’t strong enough to fight him on this. So, I chose not to fight at all. I chose to leave, like a coward. Though, at the time, I told myself I was being strong by walking away. I didn’t ever want to see the love we had for each other turn into the loathing hate my parents now felt.

I slipped out of his truck, scurrying up the steps onto my front porch. He gave me his signature grin before driving away, leaving me alone with my self-inflicted pain and guilt. I curled into a fetal position as I cried the rest of the night in my bed. By dawn, I showered, packed the remainder of my things I planned to take with me, and loaded my car. I left my mom, standing on the porch, staring after my cloud of dust.

Tucker had called every day for two weeks straight after discovering I was gone the next morning. I ignored every one of his calls, never giving him the chance to change my mind. Never giving him the explanation I knew he deserved. After that, I never heard from him again. Because after that, I changed my number and disappeared from his life altogether.