I stood by the van with my hands shoved in my pockets. A lone bird twittered in the pines above me, singing its bloody head off.

I knew exactly how it felt.

This morning I'd had another fantastic wank courtesy of the memory of August's tits as she knelt on the bathroom floor last night, patching me up. Now I stood here, waiting for her, whistling back the the birds like bloody Mary Poppins.

I had a clear head. I knew what I needed to do.

I needed to get August naked as soon as possible.

No easy task course, since she'd clearly stated that she hated my guts. But I'm a fucking rockstar. I make people love me for a living. I get in their heads and I manipulate their emotions.

If I actually tried to get her to like me, how hard could it be?

"What are you smiling about?" Ewan growled as he lumbered over to meet me. "No one has any bloody business smiling at this hour."

I grinned even wider. "Mornin' mate! Or should I say top of the mornin' to you, you bloody leprechaun?"

"I'm Scottish, you fucking asshole." Ewan was clutching his coffee mug for dear life. "The fuck is wrong with you this morning? You're in an awfully good mood. It's bloody suspicious." He glanced at Niall who was staggering towards us like a reanimated corpse. Then he looked up at he cut over my eye but thankfully said nothing about it.

"Had myself a fantastic wank this morning," I declared. "So I'm tops."

Ewan looked nauseous. Niall turned slightly green. "Just kidding, mates," I lied. This morning, in the shower, the memory of August's hands on me - the shape of her lips as the filthy words fell from them -had made me come so hard I almost blacked out against the tile walls.

"August is the last one to get here?" Hudson said, panting a little from his jog to meet us. "That's weird."

"Maybe she had a late night," Ewan ventured.

I pressed my lips together to keep my grin from betraying me.

"Yeah, maybe. With Eric," Niall singsonged.

I clenched my fist but said nothing.

Hudson shook his head. "No way," he declared vehemently. "Didn't you guys see her? She was bored as hell with that guy."

"What if he took her back and tried to fuck her?" Niall added. "Can you imagine? God help him if he's not the perfect lay, she'd probably castrate him on the spot."

"Oy," Ewan warned them and then glanced at me.

I looked up. "What?"

"Nothing."

I bristled. "Don't censor yourselves just cause I'm around."

"Nah mate, we shouldn't have been..."

"Been what? Talking about August getting fucked?" I spat.

"We know how you feel about her."

"I don't feel anything for her except a pain right here," I said, pointing at my ass.

"Well that's utter horseshite," Ewan laughed.

"What is?" August had suddenly appeared.

Ewan darted a stricken look at me, but Niall was unflappable. "This wake-up time," he lied smoothly. "You're a sadist, August."

She smiled proudly, like that was a compliment. "All the better to get a jump on the day," she said, arching one eyebrow perfectly. "I think today's going to go a lot better, don't you? Now that we all know what the expectations are?"

At this, she looked me directly in the eye.

I nodded, outwardly obedient. Aye, love. I thought to myself. I know what the expectations are. I have the expectation of hearing your bratty little mouth screaming my name.

We piled into the van and set off for the studio,. And while she was wrong about my expectations, she was right about today being a lot better. A subdued Jimmy cast one nervous look at August marching towards him, and let us do our own thing for most of the morning. We laid down a rough cut for a song Ewan had been wanting to record since our second album, and Niall figured out the bridge to for a new tune we'd so far only laid down the chorus for. We were relaxed and in sync with each other, and our playing was crisp and tight. August had called it, today was better by a long shot.

When it came time for me record the solo part, I looked up at the sound booth. "This one's for you, love!" I called," ready to show her exactly what I was made of.

She was smiling.

But not at me.

The fact that the booth was soundproof made it so I could only guess what she was saying to Eric as he handed her a cup of convenience store coffee. But I could see the way he was looking at her as he did it.

No. Get away.

She's mine.

I fumbled and dropped one of my sticks on the floor. "You got that, mate?" Ewan asked. He did some fancy football-style footwork and kicked it back up into his hands. "Got it!" he crowed, and extended it to me.

I didn't moved. Eric was still standing there. August nodded and waved a little, turning back to watch the recording, but he didn't seem to see that he'd been dismissed. He leaned against the wall and looked at me over the rim of his coffee cup. I cracked my knuckles and stood up. "Hey Jimmy!" I called as I strode over to the sound booth. "Let me hear that last playback, will you?"

I opened the door of the studio and turned sharply to open the booth door. "Hey mate," I said to Eric, stepping deliberately into the confined space. "Pardon me, not much room." I shifted and leaned over the board, deliberately bumping into him.

"Sorry," he muttered, pressing closer to the door.

I grabbed the headset and nodded to Jimmy to start the playback, then shook my head and ripped them back off again. "Sorry mate, but there's just not enough room in here for spectators to be hanging around." I glanced significantly at August's coffee. "Can you step out real quick? Hey, be a good bloke and go get some coffee for me and my mates, yeah?" I turned to August. "It's gonna be a long night together, right love?"