Chapter 29

Julian saw Peter as soon as he entered Maggie’s.

He took his time approaching. He still hadn’t heard back from Grace and he had no idea when she might show up, if at all.

“I don’t want to talk to you, man,” Peter said as Julian sat down.

Before Julian could reply, the waiter stopped by and poured Julian some water.

“I promise I won’t bring up the open marriage, Pete.”

“Fuck you,” he mumbled under his breath.

Julian spotted Grace waving at them. He sighed with relief.

“Sorry I’m late.” She sat down at the table, a big smile on her face. “I hope you guys didn’t order without me. Maybe we can get some platters to share?”

Julian reached for his water and Peter inched his chair away from him.

“What were you guys chatting about before I got here?” she continued, oblivious to their silence.

Peter cleared his throat. “I told you not to invite him.”

“Don’t you think this little spat of yours has lasted long enough?” Grace asked. “It’s time you guys get over whatever this is.”

“It’s none of your fucking business,” Peter said to Grace, his jaw clenched. “Stay out of it.”

“Don’t talk to me like that. I’m your wife. Whatever happens with you is my business.”

“Who’s watching the boys? I know our regular babysitter wasn’t free tonight.”

Grace observed Peter through narrowed eyes. “How do you know that?”

Peter started to speak but stammered, not being able to give Grace anything more than a couple of unintelligible words. For a man who had cheated on his wife multiple times, Peter was a horrible liar, Julian thought.

“You’re fucking her, aren’t you?” Grace asked with a nervous laugh. “You son of a bitch, even Seth and Eli’s nanny is fair game to you. Could you be any more of a cliché?”

“I’m not fucking her. Listen—”

“Stop,” she cut him off. “Stop with the lies. We have an agreement and you still go and cheat on me.”

“I didn’t cheat on you. We can have sex with other people, no?”

“Just because we both agreed that we can have sex with others you think fucking the nanny behind my back is OK?”

“What was I supposed to do? I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“How about not fucking her? Did you think of that? We’re supposed to have a conversation about these things. Not just run off and do whatever the hell we want.”

“You’re not being fair. You’ve gone on sleepovers with different guys and I never pressed you for answers.”

“Because it was convenient for you.”

“You still haven’t told me who’s watching the boys.”

“You weren’t concerned about them when you took off for three straight days to fuck that slutty doctor you met at the conference.” Grace stopped talking and took a steadying breath. She sipped her water. “Julian is watching them.”

“He’s sitting right here, so—”

“I have a friend from the hospital watching them,” Julian rushed to say. “I trust her completely.”

“I don’t want him watching my sons.”

“He’s not watching your sons,” Grace replied. “They’re not yours.”

Peter looked confused. Julian reached across the table and took hold of her hand. “Grace—”

“Seth and Eli are Julian’s,” she said, not letting him stop her. “We slept together when you and I broke up, after I found out you cheated on me. He’s their dad. Not you.”

His stare fixated on Grace, Peter blanched.

“Have you had a chance to look at the menu?” the waiter approached and asked cheerfully.

“We need more time,” Julian managed to say. His heart slammed so fast against his ribcage that he felt pain emanate from his chest and spread through his whole body.

“Is it true?”

Julian wanted to keep his eyes on the white tablecloth but he forced himself to face Peter. “It is.”

“Jesus, man, I can’t believe this is happening.” Peter shook his head in disbelief. “I loved you like a brother.”

Of all the possible emotions Julian expected to feel, shame was not one of them.

“I thought we told each other everything,” Peter continued.

“I didn’t want to hurt you.” He found himself using the same words Peter had used earlier.

“Why?” Peter asked. “Why did you do it?”

“It just happened…we didn’t plan it and it never happened again.”

“Bullshit. I know you. You might have not planned it at the time, but you didn’t fuck my wife and lie to me about it for over two years without ever thinking about it again. Tell me why you, my best friend, fucked my wife.”

“Pete, I don’t know.” Julian wished he could stand up. He felt trapped.

“Don’t lie to me, asshole. Tell me the truth.”

“Enough,” Grace interjected. Silent tears ran down her face. “We didn’t do it to get back at you, if that’s what you’re thinking. But knowing what I know now, I wish I had. You deserve to suffer.”

“Because I had sex with other women?” Like Grace, Peter was now crying. “I’m a good husband and father”—he paused and looked at Julian—“and friend. No one can tell me different.”

“You are a good friend,” Julian reassured him.

“Seth and Eli are my kids. You can’t have them,” Peter said, raising his voice.

“I’m not taking the boys away from you. You’re their dad.”

“I don’t want you to have anything to do with them.” Peter sounded determined.

“That’s not your call.” Grace held Julian’s hand tightly. “I want Seth and Eli to grow up knowing that Julian is their biological father. I won’t lie to my kids. Fight me on this and you’ll never see them again.”

Peter stood up and his chair fell backward, hitting the floor. The noise of it echoed throughout the restaurant. “I don’t regret cheating on you. I just wish I had never felt guilty about it.”

Peter stormed out and, as Julian picked up the overturned chair, the waiter rushed to the table and took care of it himself.

“I’m very sorry,” Julian said to the waiter. He could feel the eyes of the entire restaurant on him and Grace. “We’re leaving.”

“Not yet.” Grace dried her tears with the white napkin and then looked up at the waiter with a smile. “We’ll have a bottle of your best Cabernet Sauvignon.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Julian asked as soon as the waiter walked away.

“A three hundred dollar bottle of wine is always a good idea. Especially when it’s going on my soon-to-be-ex-husband’s credit card.”

The waiter brought them the bottle of wine with a hesitant smile.

“We love it.” Grace didn’t bother to taste the wine.

For a long while, Julian and Grace sat, side by side. She stared at her untouched glass of wine and he mulled over what would happen next.

“I wished we’d had a chance to talk about it before you told Pete,” he finally said.

“Julian, we’ve been talking about it for the last two years.”

“Will you be filing for divorce?”

“What do you think?”

“He loves Seth and Eli. He will do anything he can not to lose them.”

“Do you want shared custody?”

“If I say I do, Pete won’t let them go quietly. He knows things about me that, if they came out, it would hurt you and the boys.”

“What things?”

Julian shook his head. “Not here.”

“Don’t be afraid of Peter.”

“He’s my oldest friend. That gives him a lot of power over me.”

“This is not about him or you. It’s about Seth and Eli.”

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you—whatever Pete decides to do with what he knows will affect Seth and Eli.”

“You didn’t answer my question. I need to know, right now, if you want shared custody of Seth and Eli.”

“I’m not better than Pete, Grace.”

“One of the things I’ve learned from all of this is that I can’t raise two kids with a man I don’t respect.” She rested her hand on his cheek. “You and I aren’t in love with each other but we do respect each other. That doesn’t make you better than Pete, but it makes you better for Seth and Eli.”

Julian took hold of her hand and brought it to his lips. “I don’t want to let you down,” he said, kissing the back of her fingers. “I’ll tell you what Pete knows, and if you still feel the same way, we’ll share custody of the boys.”

“You will be a great—”

The sound of Julian’s phone ringing made Grace pause.

“Sorry, I have to get this.”

Seeing the word Private on his phone caused Julian to hold his breath. He hoped it wasn’t Tatiana calling, but as soon as he answered and heard her voice he knew that something had happened. “OK,” he said. “I’ll be right there.” He kept his voice impassive when she told him that Seth and Eli were fine but she needed him to return home at once.

“I have to go,” he said already on his feet. “I need to go and check on something at the hospital.”

“Can you keep Seth and Eli for the night? There’s a lot Pete and I need to talk about.”

“Sure, yeah, that’s not a problem.”

Julian said a hasty goodbye to Grace and rushed out of the restaurant.