Chapter Eleven

Taylor

 

“I’m sorry I’m so much trouble.” We’re cuddled up on the couch again after a long, exhausting day. The fairy lights around the fireplace twinkle and the few decorations we’ve put up to make it feel more like Christmas, with the fire burning too makes it feel more homely, romantic. After we left the others a while ago, Chris decided we’d buy a small tree and some decorations, after all it’s Christmas and at the moment we’ve been too busy to even think about it. Adam or Ryan can put them in the car when it’s time to leave.

We wanted to try and get some quality time in before the big day tomorrow, so now it’s just us. We’re not tying the knot until three, so we have plenty of time except that I have to fetch my dress from the shop.

“You’re not trouble. You just needed persuading a little bit more. I mean I don’t know why; I’m a good catch.” I roll onto my tummy until I’m lying on top of him covering him with my body.

“You’re the best.” We smile at each other, the sparkle in his eye glowing.

“Did you get everything today?”

“Yep! Right in the very last shop we went into. How about you?”

“Yeah, everything’s ready to go.”

My cheek lies on his bare chest, my eyes close contentedly. He gets himself comfy and snuggle down with me...

CRASH. My eyes spring open. “What the fuck?!” I squeal as I’m lifted from Chris and a shirt gets thrown at him.

“Get dressed.”

“Adam! What are you doing?!” Chris shouts.

“We’re going out!”

“No, I’m spending the night with Taylor on our own.” He tells his brother adamantly.

“What the fuck man? You get to spend the rest of your life with her, one night isn’t gonna kill ya! Now get your shirt on!”

Amused, I walk towards Chris. My hands rest on his chest as I look up at him. “Go spend tonight with your brothers I’ll be fine. You should go out.”

“You don’t mind?”

“No, now go!” My eyes fix on Adam then narrow so he knows I mean business, “don’t get him drunk Ad.”

He points to his own chest. “Me?” he scoffs. “Would I? I’m a respectable man now about to become a Dad, what makes you think I’d even think about a thing like that?” he frowns, which soon turns into a smirk.

“Because I know you. I’m warning you if he has a hangover…”

He winks. “Trust me.” He kisses my cheek and walks out the door as Chris grabs me by the hips and pulls me closer to him. His lips covering mine and tangling his tongue with mine in an intense and all-consuming kiss. I’m breathless by the time he’s finished.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.”

“Love you too.” 

 

The girls join me in our lodge with wine. We drink and chat and laugh especially when I let them in on the secret about what the men are wearing. “Really you have them wearing Kilts?” Asks Darcy. Obviously, she’s the only one not drinking because of the baby and is keeping us in check making sure we don’t drink too much.

“Yep.” I grin wickedly. “I’m sorry but you can’t get married in Scotland and not go the whole hog. Chris wants to marry me then there’s no stone to be left unturned.”

“I can’t friggin wait!” Ash laughs.

We watch some Christmas movies, Elf, Miracle on 34th street and now we’re watching Bad Santa. We’re having a Christmas movie fest. Annemarie and Michelle aren’t with us though they’ve all stayed in together and grabbing food.

Everyone’s starting to get tired though and Darcy definitely needs her sleep. I walk Darcy to her Lodge, then run back to ours. Chris booked all the lodges close together as a wedding party booking - sneaky. I look out and see there’s a hard frost at the moment, everything’s white over. Maybe we’ll have snow?

The five of us are booked into the spa at nine in the morning and the hairdressers which is attached so we can be pampered for the big day. I haven’t seen the venue, Chris said he wanted it to be a surprise, so I haven’t bugged him.

“Ahh.” My hands fly to my mouth covering it as I let out a gasp.

“What’s up?”

“We haven’t got rings!”

“Oh, is that all?”

“What you mean is that all. We have to have rings.”

“I’m sure Chris has it covered.” Ash tries to reassure me but it’s not really working.

“He better.” I look to the car seat and see Alyssia softly snoring. “Is that all she does is sleep?”

“Yeah pretty much. She’s like her Daddy.”

“Can I wake her up?”

“No, you can’t!”

“Spoilsport.” I tut.

Ash drags herself up. “I better get going.” I nod at her and sit up. She pulls her Uggs on and stands gripping the car seat handle and picking up Alyssia. I kiss her forehead and follow her to the door. “About eight- thirty yeah?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Ryan better not have too much then had he…” She laughs as she walks away. I wish those two would get married but, who knows. Once she’s safely inside the lodge, I stay on the doorstep looking out at the scene in front of me. It’s so Christmassy. Maybe we could live up here, it’s quiet, much better away from the hustle and bustle of a city...but then again could I cope without city life? Tearing myself away from the cold I go inside, get warm by the fire then tuck myself away in bed for the night.

I type out a text to Chris first before I get myself comfy...

 

Me: Goodnight. I love you. Don’t be late. Xxx

 

I don’t wait for an answer. I wrap myself up in the duvet and fall asleep almost instantly, contented.

 

 

Chris

 

Stumbling into Todd’s lodge, I collapse onto the couch and pull my phone out. My eyes squint as I hold the phone about an inch from my face but the words are blurry. “Taylor.” Clicking on the message I try to type to answer her but it comes out foreign. Pressing the home button, I decide to call her instead. The phone rings and rings but she doesn’t answer. “Todd!” He doesn’t answer either.

I listen out for a voice but nothing. My eyes won’t stay open either and the room is spinning, how much did I have to drink? “TODD?”

“Shut up man, you could wake the dead with how loud you are.”

“Shhhhhh.” My index finger rests against my lips to tell him to be quiet. Todd shakes his head at me.

“You are going to be in SO much trouble tomorrow!”

“What’s dat... shay?” I slur out.

“Goodnight, I love you. Don’t be late.” Todd reads.

“I love her!”

“I know you do. Go to sleep or she’s gonna rip your bollocks off.”

I pat the side of me gesturing for Todd to sit. He frowns but sits anyway. Wrapping my arm around his shoulders, I pull his head to my shoulder. “Love you bro.”

“I know you do. Love you too.” Todd gets up as quick as he can. I’m swaying, my head falls to the couch and my eyes close.

“She’s not answering, T...”

“Taylor’s more than likely asleep. It’s one a.m.”

My focus has gone now, I can hear Todd’s voice just about but it’s distant. “Yeah, that’s it you go to sleep.” I drift off in comatose sleep and hope I don’t have a hangover tomorrow.

 

 

Todd

 

Pulling off Chris’s shoes I leave him where he is. He’s pissed as a fart! Adam and Ryan are so dead when Taylor finds out. I lost count how many Jagerbombs he’s had! I shake out the duvet from the spare bed and throw it over him then place a pillow under his head.

I’m always the adult where my brothers are concerned. My phone vibrates in my pocket, I pull it out and see a name I don’t necessarily want to see. If I open the message he’ll know I’ve seen it and expect an answer. I’m not prepared to answer questions right now. I needed a clean break and time with my family, this has allowed that.

Instead of answering Chad’s message, I scroll to Adam’s name.

Me: He’s passed out, you’re in big trouble if he’s got a hangover tomorrow. Just saying.

Adam: Stop being an old woman. He’s getting married.

Me: I know, I will tell Taylor this was all on you. LOL

Adam: Fuck it. I can take it.

Me: Yeah, yeah. You’re brave now...

 

Shaking my head at his text, my finger hovers over the next message that is still waiting to be opened, screaming at me to just do it. While I’m still thinking another notification pops across the top of my screen again.

 

Hesitantly I open the message.

 

Chad: Where are you? I want to see you.

Chad: Are you ignoring me?

 

I’m not very good at sharing my feelings, my brothers know what’s going on with Chad and so does Taylor. Mum and Dad were shocked but they’re okay with me being bisexual, they don’t know much, they just know what they need to know. The only one who isn’t okay with it is Aidan but he’ll come around I think. He’s just not really talking to me but that’s his problem not mine. I daren’t tell Adam, he’ll kick off, they don’t see eye to eye at the best of times.

Laying the phone down on the bed, I rest my head back and think about everything. When I think about it I don’t actually think I’m bisexual, I think I’m gay. I like women but they don’t arouse the feelings in me that men do, I just don’t know anything anymore.

Fuck I’m so confused.

The phone rings, so instead of being a pussy, I pick it up; it’s Chad. How did I know it would be him? Putting him out of his misery I answer.

 

“Hey.

“Where the fuck are you and why aren’t you answering my texts?”

“Because I’m not at home.”

“Where the fuck are you then?”

“I’m in Scotland if you must know.”

“Scotland?”

“Yep. My brother’s getting married.” His voice does the same thing to me it always does but he wants a commitment and I don’t think I can do that yet. He’s openly gay. He’s tentative, but a little controlling, everything has to be his way and I’m not into giving up everything for just him. I don’t even know what I want myself yet.

“TODD?”

“What?” I huff out heavily.

“Where did you go?”

“I was just thinking. Chad I’ll talk to you when I’m home. It’s almost two am I can’t do this now. Speak soon.”

I cut him off before he has a chance to say anything else.

Muting my phone, I place it at the side of me and strip off my clothes, I ignore the hard on I’m currently sporting in my boxers; I refuse to jerk off with my brother in the next room - pissed or not, instead, I climb into bed and try to clear my head of everything and go to sleep.

After tossing and turning for half an hour, I realise that sleep isn’t happening so I get up. Walking into the living area, I don’t see Chris on the couch. Walking around to the other side, I see his feet first but then I see him sprawled out on the floor fast asleep. A quiet knock at the door sounds, I frown in confusion as to why there would be someone knocking my door at almost three in the morning I shake my head at the state of him and walk towards the door. Pulling it open, I see Aidan standing on the step. “Hi Todd.”

“Aidan, what the fuck are you doing here?”

“I thought it was time I put my brother first for a change. Can I come in?”

“Of course, you can.” I push the door away from me so he can step inside.

“Fuck it’s freezing.”

“When did you get here?”

“About an hour and half ago.” He rubs his hands together to get some warmth. “Got a taxi from the airport.” As I’m shutting the door, I hear him laughing. “What a sight for sore eyes.” He laughs as he takes out his phone and takes a picture of him. “Has Taylor seen him?”

I turn to him sniggering. “Are you crazy? I’ve already let him know she’ll kill him and the reply I got was ’I love her’!” My head shakes with a roll of my eyes. “I’m tired, I’ve not slept yet. There’s a single bed in my room if you want it?” He nods half-heartedly. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Todd?” I stop and turn back to him, looking my brother in the face. “Thanks.”

“You’re my brother.” I shrug and turn back leaving him to think on that.

I crawl into bed and hope that sleep finds me this time….