Shin Lu sat behind her desk in the Longshadows waiting room, her eyes combing Kat up and down, something that also happened last time she was in those offices.

Tia McBride escorted Kat into the office and took a seat behind her big, glass desk. “Miss Flowers, how nice to see you again.”

“Thank you for seeing me,” she said politely, almost sheepishly.

Tia held her hands out as if showcasing the plush office around her. “It’s what I do. I trust you enjoyed our experience?”

“Oh my God, I—” Kat stopped herself three words too late. “I found it to be…interesting,” she said instead in a more measured tone. “Let’s say it piqued my interest.”

Tia smiled. “I’m very glad to hear it. Well, thank you for coming all this way just to express your…your interest.”

“Well actually, I was…interested in thinking about maybe…having another experience.”

“Is that so?” Tia looked her up and down with that cocky, knowing half-smile tucked into her creamy, pale cheek. “Miss Flowers, as I recall your previous experience was discounted because your friend is, well, she’s in the business. And she did pay for it. Do you know how much one of these experiences costs?” This had been something Kat didn’t give any consideration to, so all she could really do was shake her head. Tia said flatly, “Five thousand dollars.”

“Five—?” My God, Jackie must have blown every cent she had on that! What a friend. But that was neither the time nor the place to reflect on Jackie’s loyalty.

Tia said, “It’s a luxury experience, darling. We generally cater to very rich clientele.”

“I guess I thought as much,” came dribbling out of Kat’s mouth. “What if we struck a deal?” Tia sat there in a cool, professional silence, letting Kat make her offer. “You said you needed a female service operator. Maybe I could, um, volunteer for one session, in return for a session of my own.”

Tia considered it, tilting her head. She’d looked her over before, but this was the one that counted. “I’m sorry, hon, but you’re just not the type.” Reading Kat’s disappointment, Tia explained, “You’re too cute, honey; you’re much more a sub than a dom.”

“Well, that’s a little rude.”

Tia couldn’t help but smile. “No offense, honey. Now your friend, she’s got a lot of dom energy in her; I can sense it. I’ll bet she does that all the time on the phone.” Kat couldn’t disagree, but there wasn’t much else she could do either, until Tia said, “I’ll tell you what. She gives me one night of service—we’ll call it an audition for her regular employment with me, and I’ll divert that payment to cover your next experience. How does that sound?”

Kat’s imagination scrambled, but some things were instantly clear. “Even if I can get her to do it once, I can’t guarantee she’ll have sex with anybody.”

“No, of course not.”

“And I can’t promise she’ll work for you after that either—just the one time.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything else. Lena, I’m in the business of putting people together. I don’t buy or sell or trade them.”

That was good to hear, so Kat didn’t mention any of the obvious contradictions in the statement. She was too close to getting what she’d come for. So she said only, “I’ll do what I can.”

“Excellent. When your roommate comes down and we can make the proper arrangement, you’ll get a call about when to be ready.” Kat was already excited, her blood seeming to rush in her veins. Tia said, “Let’s talk about the details. In your apartment again?”

“Um, no, this time I think maybe a hotel room.”

“It’s extra.”

“I’ll cover it. Just have Carter grab me off the street or something, and—”

“Carter?”

Uh-oh. Shit.

“Yeah?”

Tia’s face grimaced and she shook her head with a deep sigh. “He shouldn’t have told you his name, I’ll have to talk with him about that.”

“No no, don’t,” Kat said. “I don’t wanna get him in trouble.”

“Rules are rules, Lena.”

“But I don’t want that to spoil my experience.”

Tia sat there, her green eyes going cold, all expression melting away from her pretty face. “Lena, might I suggest a different service provider? After all, you’ve already had one type of experience. And look what it’s done for you. Maybe now you should try a whole new experience, further broaden your horizons.”

But Kat didn’t have to give that any thought at all. “No, it has to be Carter. Carter or it’s no deal.”

Tia stood up and walked slowly around the side of the desk. “Lena, I know what you’re thinking, and feeling, I really do. This man, he’s impressive, believe me, I know. I handpick all my S.P.s. But it’s the experience you fell in love with, not the man.”

“Fell in love? Who said that? I just…I like him; he’s earned my trust. That means something to me.”

“And not trusting him at first meant something too, didn’t it? He was unfamiliar, strange, and startling, a bit scary maybe. But that’s what you really wanted: something alien and troubling, jostling. Having a familiar S.P. really defeats that purpose.”

But she only shrugged one shoulder, not to be dissuaded. “I guess we’re all a little different.”

Kat and Tia stared each other down, a mutual, silent refusal hovering between them. Tia broke the silence with, “Lena, I can’t recommend that you allow yourself to get attached to this man. It’s not going to work out the way you think.”

Kat wanted to snap, but held back and politely said, “Honestly, I don’t think you know what I’m thinking at all.”

But Tia just stood there, looking down at her in a moment of private uncertainty that Kat could clearly read. “Send your friend down here,” Tia said, “I’ll see what I can do.”

But she was stronger than she’d been before meeting Carter, stronger than the last time she’d met with Tia. Kat stood up and said, “You know my terms,” before walking out of the office, enjoying the little glare she’d earned from Tia on the way out.

* * *

Kat walked down Fifth Avenue, preferring not to rush back into the subway. The sun was getting steadily hotter in that bright slit between the tops of the skyscrapers. Pedestrians shuffled in each direction in front of the glitzy shops, dresses and fur coats and bejeweled eggs in the windows.

She had a strange feeling—a nervous creep up her spine. She stopped and turned, but there wasn’t anybody or anything that seemed out of place. Just my imagination, she told herself—ridiculous. I’ve got stalkers on the brain.

Moving on, she had other things to think about to distract her from her kinky daydreams. Will Jackie be upset with me? Will she even do it? How different is it from the phone thing she does? I’ve done both, and I know how different they are, but that’s me. Jackie is a whole other girl. She’s a dom; I’m a sub. She’ll know what that means, and hopefully what difference it makes.

Kat walked farther down the crowded avenue, but she still couldn’t shake that feeling. A black car was cruising the avenue just a few feet behind her, never falling back too far or pulling ahead.

It’s just going with the slow flow of the traffic, she reassured herself. Don’t be silly!

But her imagination couldn’t resist reviewing the list of people who could actually have a reason to be angry with her, and that list had grown quickly. There’s Mitchell, who knows what he’s capable of? And what about that burly guy at the Matthews party? He had a lingering kind of attention—that guy talking him down behind the tree. Who knows what’s been going through his mind all this time? And Ben, he’s super-pissed. All those years lusting after me, then I go and sleep with some stranger and tell him about it? Stupid! I almost wouldn’t blame him. Still, he doesn’t drive a car, though I guess he could have rented one.

Kat glanced back over her shoulder—that black car still behind her, a rental car plate frame around the license plate reading Budget Rent-A-Car.

Shit!

Calm down, Leen, she told herself, you know how many tourists there are in New York every day? Get a grip.

She didn’t flinch, not wanting to trigger any chase response in case her wild hair of a notion actually had any merit. Maybe this is becoming too much. It started with a few lies, to my mother, to Ben. Now I’ve thrown my business away, I’m swapping out my best friend for some desperate bid for a world I don’t understand and I’m not even sure I could survive. I mean, I’m wild about the guy, I can’t deny it. But what do I think a second session is going to achieve? Do I think he’s just gonna…keep me? What do I do when he releases me again and nothing has changed?

But Kat felt that creepy sensation again, unable to resist walking a bit faster. Her palms started to sweat a little and she clenched her fists, ready to use them and all her training. She thought about Carter, yet again, about his power and strength. No assailant could be a greater physical threat, and she very nearly did knock him off his feet. She walked on with a greater tension and readiness, her senses more alert.

Maybe I should just give this all up, Kat thought. It’s only bringing out the worst in me. I thought maybe it had opened new doors, given me a new lease on life. But the lying and the … the dealmaking, the paranoia; maybe there’s a reason people don’t do this kind of thing…ever, never mind doing it all the time.

But that rang hollow in Kat’s head and in her heart. No, there’s something…something natural about me, something basic, primitive. She looked at the city around her, a museum of modern civilization. She took in the people shuffling past her, each on their way to wherever they needed to be in a lifelong litany of chores, meetings, meals. They seemed like zombies to her, each roaming through the wasteland of their lives. I’ll bet it’s no different in Tucson, or anywhere else. But I don’t want to be one of them, not anymore.

She walked on, deciding to turn right on West 53rd Street, just to make sure. Maybe someone from that sex service? Tia McBride didn’t seem all that pleased with me, that’s for sure.

No, she wants Jackie, and now would be the time for her to watch and wait, not start trailing me.

Could it be Carter? I know he felt the same thing I felt. What’s he been doing since then? What does he do; what’s his life like? Who is he, really? I’ve got to find out; I’ve got to see him again. What if that was him in the car and I’ve lost him?

Kat turned to cross back toward Fifth and gasped in quick terror.