victoria

 

 

Victoria was on autopilot as she made her way down the familiar streets of her old neighbourhood. She was on her way to have dinner at her parents’, but her mind could focus on only one thing: Bradley.

She had hoped to see him earlier that day, but he had exams coming up in two weeks and had to buckle down and study. She sighed as she thought about the delicious afternoon they could have shared, then shook her head.

She consoled herself with his words, and tried to cheer up as she pulled up to her old home with its familiar awning and front porch.

“Hi mom, hi everyone,” she called out as she walked in and set her purse down on the side table.

“Oh, hi dear, come on in!” her mom called out from the living room. “We’re just having a coffee in here. Dinner will be ready in a minute,” she said as Victoria joined them.

Her mom went back to the kitchen as Victoria took a seat next to her dad. She wished she could avoid making eye contact with Julia – she knew she’d turn crimson under her gaze.

Her dad was immersed in a football game, while Julia made small talk and tried to seem interested in the game.

“So, Victoria, how’s everything?” her dad asked. He was acting differently too – he had a spark in his eyes and his question was more pointed than usual in its tone.

Victoria was confused; she wondered why everyone was acting so strangely and started to get a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“So, I hear. How’s your project partner? What’s his name again?” He looked to Julia for an answer but didn’t need her help after all. “Bradley, isn’t it? How’s Bradley?” he asked, raising his eyebrows and taking a sip of his coffee.

The realization of what was going on dawned on her with the weight of a thousand bricks, and she looked at Julia, who was shrinking back into her seat with a sheepish expression on her face.

No! What did you do?? She wanted to yell at her. Obviously, her dad had found out about Bradley from Julia, which was ironic, since she had been the one imploring Victoria to keep her mouth shut. She tried not to panic, and struggled to put on her poker face. She wouldn’t have told him everything, would she?

“He’s fine. We’ve been working hard on lining up sponsors and delegating tasks to the board members and the younger associates at the firm.” She noticed the slight shake in her voice and wanted to kick someone. Preferably Julia.

“One second, I want to go get a coffee,” she said. When she was out of her dad’s line of sight, she frantically motioned to Julia to follow her and made a face that showed she meant business. Julia hesitated, but followed her.

Once they were in the hallway, and she was sure no one could hear them, she spun around to face her sister.

“I’m so, so sorry,” Julia started. She seemed genuinely mortified. “We were just talking about your work with the fundraising and it just slipped out before I could stop.”

Victoria sighed. She hated being mad at her sister. “Well, how much did you tell him?”

“Not much, I swear. And I didn’t tell him about the fact that he takes off his clothes for money, and does god knows what else.” She realized what she had just said and shook her head. “Sorry, but you know what I mean. All I said was that you were working late hours these days and that you’ve started dating him. He doesn’t know any of the other stuff.”

Victoria looked towards the kitchen. Well, at least she hadn’t blabbed everything, and it took some of the weight off her shoulders. And she wasn’t keeping as many secrets anymore, because Julia had taken that choice away from her.

“Ok, fine. Well, there’s nothing we can do about it now. Just don't tell them anymore details please,” she said, and at the sound of her mother's footsteps, she took off for the kitchen.

“Dinner’s ready girls. Honey! Dinner’s ready!” she called out towards the living room.

Just then, Victoria’s phone beeped, telling her she received a text message. She turned it to vibrate but took a look at the text. It was from Ashley.

hey what’s up?

She responded quickly.

Not much. What are you up to?

She took a seat at the table next to her dad, who always sat at the head of the table. Then she remembered her coffee, put her phone down on the table, and made a quick beeline to the kitchen. When she came back, a hot steaming cup of coffee in her hand, everyone had already taken their seats and were helping themselves.

Everyone except her dad. He glared at her, his expression a mixture of dismay and disappointment. What is it this time? she thought to herself, taking her seat.

“You got a message,” her dad said to her under his breath before reaching out to take a serving of casserole.

Victoria’s eyes jumped to her phone, face up on the table between her dad and her, the green preview of a text lighting up. She grabbed it and focused on the words.

Her heart sank and her ears started ringing. It was Ashley again.

When r we going back to ur bf’s strip club? I want to see some man candy (the others, not yours)!

Her face flushed bright red and she cleared her throat as she slid the phone into her jean’s back pocket.

“I want to talk to you before you leave,” he said quietly, without looking at her.

 

****

 

She opened the door softly, hoping that if he didn’t hear her come in, it might delay his harsh lecture by another thirty seconds.

No such luck.

He was sitting at his desk updating his calendar, but his head shot up as soon as he heard her. The look in his eyes obliterated any hope she had that he might go easy on her.

“Victoria, have a seat,” he said in a calm voice, indicating the chair across from him. She sat down, her hands in her lap.

“Victoria, let me say my piece.”

She nodded.

“As you may have guessed, I did read the message on your phone. I’m not the snoopy sort, but your screen lit up and it was impossible to ignore. That said, I’m glad I saw it.” He cleared the desk in front of him. He was obviously in this for the long haul. “Victoria, I thought we raised you – your mother and I – with a solid moral framework and basic common sense. Obviously, we’ve failed somewhere along the line.”

Victoria opened her mouth to object; she didn’t think she was doing anything immoral or wrong, but her father stopped her.

“Now, listen. You know I’m a fairly liberal guy. How anyone makes their living isn’t my business, so long as it doesn’t hurt anyone. But this could hurt you. I don’t know this young man, but do you think he has a lot of respect for himself or those women he dances for? And even if we ignored the moral aspect, there’s the issue of common sense. Do you think that if your boss or the other partners at the firm found out about this, that they’ll just overlook it and act is if it’s of no consequence?”

He looked at her sharply. “No, darling, they won’t.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm. “They’re going to question your judgment in your personal affairs. And then they’ll wonder whether you have the same lack of judgment in professional affairs as well. Trust me, this will not put you in a great light, and it will follow you throughout your career. No one will take you seriously. So, here’s my advice. Forget this guy while this thing – whatever it is –is in its early stages and before things get too complicated. Please, don’t embarrass me or the rest of your family. If this gets out, it’ll reflect badly on all of us. I feel really strongly about this, so this is final.”

Victoria had been listening, and felt anger and hurt rise within her. She wanted to say something, but her lips were quivering too hard.

Satisfied that he had said his piece, her father leaned back in his leather chair and raised a hand in her direction, indicating it was her turn. “If you have something to say, now’s your chance. But remember, this thing is not going to last and it’s not going to end well. So just put yourself out of your misery and end it.”

Victoria’s mouth and throat were dry. She coughed, and readied herself to speak.

“Dad, I think you’re being really unfair. First of all, he’s a great guy. Sure, he’s doing this to make some extra money. But do you know why?” Her eyes pleaded with him to really listen to her. “It’s to help pay for his six-year-old sister’s cancer treatment and for his medical school tuition. His family isn’t rich. It’s not as if his single mom could afford everything that you and mom can.”

She wondered whether that little attempt at a guilt trip would hurt or help, but she didn’t care; she was willing to try anything.

“Everything he does, he does for a good cause. He’s always studying, visiting his sister in the hospital, visiting his mom and trying to keep her spirits up. He’s literally a saint, and I can’t believe that you would judge him so harshly.”

She had no idea where the courage to confront him came from. She surprised even herself. She continued, "Do you think he’d be able to do all that with a job washing dishes? And I haven’t even mentioned how, on top of all that, he still has it in him to give a lot of his time to charity. Yes, for free! It really hurts that you think so little of him...for no good reason at all.” Her eyes welled with tears, which she quickly brushed away. “Dad, I love him. I can’t explain it and I can’t control it. I certainly can’t deny it and make it go away.”

Her father’s expression was a mixture of sympathetic concern and annoyance. She knew she wasn’t getting through to him.

“That’s all fine, honey. I know it’ll hurt for a while, but you’ll get over it. You work at one of the best firms, why don’t you find a boyfriend there? You can get married and one day buy a nice big house here in Connecticut, close to us.”

At this point, she wanted to strangle him. “He’s not disposable, dad. You don’t understand.”

“Victoria, I do understand. Trust me, I know how these things work. Think about what I’ve said, ok?”

“I already know what I think about what you’ve said, dad. I’m sorry that you feel the way you do. I really don't know what else to say. You know I’m discreet. The only reason you know about this is because Julia slipped up.”

“Well, then, you’re not so discreet after all, are you?” he shot back.

Victoria stood up. She realized this was going nowhere, and she wasn’t willing to be humiliated and treated like a little girl any longer.

“Dad, I have to go now,” she said. She didn’t have the nerve to just walk out without saying bye, she respected her father way too much. Simply ending the conversation herself was enough to let him know that she’d had enough.

“Alright. Well, you know how I feel. I’m sure your mother will agree with me. But, whatever you decide, even if you go against my wishes, just try to keep things quiet for your own sake, will you? I may seem heavy-handed now, but you’ll thank me later.”

“Fine, dad. Bye,” she said quietly and curtly, opening the heavy door and sneaking out quickly. She said her byes to her mom and sister, and managed to keep the tears from flowing until she sat behind the wheel. Then, they overflowed.