Serge was a coward.

In the four days since Gaven’s death, he’d holed up in Dex’s apartment and refused to leave. He couldn’t face anyone—not their condolences, their pitying looks, or the predators hidden among the good men out there. Every night, he woke up shouting, terrified someone else he loved had been shot right in front of him. Sometimes he saw Gaven dying all over again, other times it was Dex taking his last breath in Serge’s arms.

Dex, bless him, possessed the patience of a saint for taking care of Serge through every nightmare, every random crying fit, and every refusal for something as simple as a walk around the block. Dex even went over to Serge’s place to get him clean clothes and his own toiletries. When Serge wasn’t scared or grieving, he allowed himself a few moments to enjoy seeing his deodorant and shampoo in Dex’s bathroom alongside Dex’s stuff.

Mostly, though, Serge hid and grieved his friend.

On the fifth day, though, Serge had no choice but to don a suit and attend Gaven’s funeral. His ashes were being interred at his family’s mausoleum later in the day, but a public memorial was being held in a nearby chapel. Serge showered and dressed by rote, ate by rote because Dex put food in front of him, and then forced his feet to carry him out the front door. Down the stairs. Across the street to Dex’s car.

Serge stared at the passing streets without seeing anything, completely numb to what was about to happen. A final goodbye to his best friend and roommate. His dry, sandy eyes stung but he had no more tears left. He couldn’t possibly, after all the tears he’d already shed.

Dex parked near the chapel, then came around to open Serge’s door. His rock in this storm, Dex held Serge’s hand tightly as they walked up the short steps and into the small building. Rows of wooden chairs faced an elevated platform, where someone had placed a large, framed photo of Gaven. His hospital ID photo, so he was in scrubs and wore a big, bright smile.

Serge looked away.

He did his duty in sharing condolences with Gaven’s parents and siblings, exchanging hugs and warm memories of Gaven, and then sat down. Dozens of men filled the chapel, so many more than Serge expected of someone who’d died so young. Then again, Gaven was a friendly—no, had been—a friendly guy, and he’d probably touched a lot of lives in his brief twenty-four years on earth.

Gaven’s sire began the service, speaking heartfelt words about his second son, of whom he was so proud. Serge tuned most of it out, because he already knew all these things about his friend. When the man turned the podium over to anyone who wanted to share memories or a story about Gaven, a small line formed. All his siblings spoke, each breaking down by the time they stepped away.

Serge’s heart ached for their pain. He’d never had a brother, and he couldn’t imagine the agony they were going through. Beside him, Dex wept silent tears—probably as much for the heartbroken siblings, as for knowing his own siblings likely wouldn’t be as kind if they lost Dex.

Serge wanted to believe he and Dex would have a long, happy life, full of friends and maybe even a child of their own, but now Serge knew better. He knew how precious life was and how quickly it could be extinguished. Working at the hospital hadn’t taught him that as starkly as Gaven’s death had. And even though Cyril Gibbs was facing murder charges, nothing would bring Gaven’s shining light back into the world.

As the line of speakers dwindled, Serge shocked himself by releasing Dex’s hand, standing, and joining those few still waiting. He had no idea what he was going to say until he was at the podium, his turn to speak.

“I met Gaven in nursing school,” Serge said, not daring to meet the eyes of anyone in the crowd, except Dex. “He sat next to me at orientation, stuck his hand out to introduce himself, and told me we were going to be friends. At first, I didn’t know what to make of him, because he was so in-your-face and blunt, but he was also really funny. He could see the humor in every situation, and we did become friends. Best friends and roommates.

“He helped me through a crisis in my life with unwavering support, by simply being there when I was in pain and not demanding answers from me. I probably wouldn’t be here if not for Gaven’s love and understanding. And he introduced me to a man I love very much, and who I’m blessed to have love me in return simply because Gaven decided me and Dex were perfect for each other.

“And that’s who my friend was. He attacked life with both hands, and he loved people with his whole heart, and I can only aspire to be the kind of man he was. To love and support my friends in any way possible, and to live each day to its fullest. Those are the lessons Gaven taught me, and I’ll be forever grateful to have had him my life.”

Tears came then, and Serge returned to his seat before they fell in earnest. Dex hugged him while he silently cried, keeping Serge together like the amazing man Dex was.

* * *

The next day, Serge returned to his apartment for the first time since leaving for work the day of the shooting. The air was rank from disuse and old food, takeout boxes Gaven had meant to throw out, and a black banana on the counter. But Serge wasn’t here to clean the kitchen.

Gaven’s sire and eldest alpha brother were here with him to collect Gaven’s things.

Dex had also taken the day off to be there with Serge, knowing Serge couldn’t handle being alone with two alphas who were mostly strangers. They had boxes and packed up Gaven’s bedroom first. Serge sorted out the living room, leaving the things that weren’t his in a pile on the couch, while Dex cleaned. Serge and Gaven had gone in together on the television, so if the family wanted it, they could have it.

After the living room, Serge tackled the kitchen with the brother. Most of the cookware had been Gaven’s, but the plates and cups were mostly Serge’s stuff. Serge didn’t cry, but grief hovered just below the surface, taunting him with every small piece of Gaven that his family removed from the apartment.

Dex ordered pizza delivery, and they all ate silently at the dining table before that was packed into a moving van. Once his guests left, Serge collapsed on the couch with Dex and stared at the spot where the television had been.

“I don’t know what to do next,” Serge said.

“Then sit with me for a while.” Dex ran his fingers through Serge’s hair in a gentle massage.

“I can’t, my mind keeps racing. I can’t afford this place on my own salary, and the idea of finding another roommate is so daunting…I wouldn’t know where to begin. Plus, the lease is in Gaven’s name, so what if I can’t stay here?”

“I’ll make some calls about the lease, okay? We’ll figure it out.” Dex kissed his temple. “It’ll be okay, babe.”

“I don’t even know if I want to stay here. I see Gaven everywhere. I hear his voice, his footsteps, even the obnoxious way he ate popcorn with his mouth open.”

Dex’s hand stilled, and he pulled away enough to look Serge directly in the eyes, his expression hesitant. “I have an idea. A little radical, but hear me out.”

“Okay.” Serge was emotionally and physically exhausted, and he had no clue was what about to come out of Dex’s mouth.

“Move in with me.”

Serge’s lips parted and his eyebrows went up as shock rolled through him. “Move in with you?”

“Yes. I mean, you’ve lived with me this past week already, and I love having you there. In my place, part of my life. You won’t have to stress about staying here, or finding a new place, and if it’s too soon to live together as a couple, you can move into the guest room first, but I would love it if you’d move into my room. Our room. In our place.”

Our place.

It sounded almost too good to be true. Moving in with someone after knowing them for six months and dating for only part of that? Radical.

But also…right. He’d loved living with Dex, waking up next to him every morning, despite the circumstances of why Serge was there. Dex’s apartment had become home without Serge realizing it, and he wanted to go back. This had been his home with Gaven, and his friend was gone. But before he left, Gaven had given Serge the best gift of all: a life with Dex.

And hadn’t Serge promised to live each day to the fullest?

“Yes,” Serge replied. “I’ll move in with you. To our place.”

Dex whooped and tackled him to the couch with a joyful kiss that made Serge laugh against his lips. Serge had forgotten how to laugh, but Dex reminded him. Dex made him the happiest man in the entire world, and he wanted the world to know it.

Serge wrested his mouth away from Dex and said, “Marry me.”

“What?” Dex pulled up, his wide eyes shining with surprise and joy. “Really?”

“Yes. Life’s too short, Dex. I love you. I want to build a life with you, maybe one day adopt a child together. Create a family.”

“I want all that too.” Dex pulled him up so they were sitting side-by-side, a place they were always meant to be. “Yes, okay, let’s get married.”

Serge’s chest burned with so many emotions he couldn’t name them all, but above all was love. Love he never thought possible, because Serge thought he’d been broken. But he hadn’t. He’d simply hidden away, waiting for Dex to come along and show him what true joy was. And Serge couldn’t wait for the rest of their life together to begin….

…. “Babe, you’re making my coffee nervous,” Dex said.

Serge huffed and stopped his latest bout of pacing the family room. The last update about Kay’s delivery progress had been over an hour ago, and Serge’s fingers itched to finally hold their son. A son he’d been dreaming about for more than six years, and they were finally getting soon.

Always soon.

I need it to be now before I explode.

“You know, watching you is like a gift from the future,” Dex added, “because now I know exactly how Tarek is going to act while Braun is in labor in two months, but times a thousand.”

Serge snorted, because Dex was right. Tarek was already a nervous, overprotective sire, and Braun hadn’t even given birth yet.

Someone knocked on the half-open door, and Serge’s heart leapt into his throat—but his excitement dimmed when a familiar alpha stepped into the room with a tentative smile. Monte Porter had aged in the last few years, but he also looked exactly the same. “Hey, I thought I heard familiar voices,” Monte said.

“Hey, Monte,” Dex said as he struggled to stand. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, it has.”

Monte still worked for the constabulary, but he’d yet to pass the constable exam, and was still a patrolman. He and Dex had never repaired the friendship that Monte’s careless words had broken, but through the gossip chain, they knew he was still with Ivan and had a growing family.

“What are you guys doing here?” Monte asked, that smile never dropping.

“Waiting for our first baby to be born,” Serge replied. “He’s due any moment.”

“You’re adopting? That’s amazing. There’s nothing like being a father. Ivan’s actually in labor now with our fourth.”

“Congratulations, man,” Dex said. They both shook Monte’s hand. “You on your way back to him?”

“Yes, I was out for a bathroom break and heard your voices. I couldn’t help stopping by to say hello. You both look great.”

“We’re doing very well, thank you,” Serge replied. “Good luck with your newest.”

“Thanks. You guys, too. Enjoy the hell out of him young, because they grow fast. Take care.”

Monte was gone as suddenly as he’d appeared, and Serge was glad. He no longer had any feelings about Monte other than apathy, but he was glad for Ivan that the family was doing well. And he selfishly hadn’t wanted Monte around when he and Dex met their baby for the first time. This was too damned private.

The goddess answered Serge’s prayers a few moments later, when a nurse named Aiko appeared with a tiny wrapped bundle in his arms. Serge’s knees nearly gave out as he studied the small, scrunched face peeking out from the green swaddling blanket. “Meet your son,” Aiko said. “He’s a big boy, too, this little alpha. Nine pounds, eight ounces, and twenty-two inches long.”

“Hello, little man,” Serge said. So beautiful and an alpha at that—who said the goddess didn’t have a sense of humor with her blessings? Aiko slid the bundle into his arms, and Serge breathed him in. Kissed his smooth forehead and studied his Cupid’s bow mouth. “Oh, Dex, he’s perfect.”

“Yes, he is.” Dex stood next to him and ran a finger down the baby’s cheek. “Our son. Oh, Serge.”

“Yeah.” They shared a joyful kiss over their son’s head, then returned to staring. Serge couldn’t make himself look away. “We’re fathers now. Goddess, what if we screw this up?”

“Not a chance. Because not only do we want to be parents, but we have a whole family of friends lined up to help us if we need them. Alphas, omegas, and betas alike, so we won’t be doing this alone.”

Serge looked up and waited for Dex to meet his gaze. “I know we haven’t decided on a name yet, but I’ve been thinking, and I’d really love to name him Gaven.”

Dex’s eyes gleamed. “Yeah?”

“Yes. We wouldn’t be here today without my late friend, and I can’t think of a better way to honor him than for our first son to be his namesake.”

“I’d love that.” Dex pushed a bit more of the blanket out of the way. “Hello, Gaven. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

“Gaven Kenward Freel. Welcome to the world.”

Serge relinquished Gaven to Dex’s capable hands, and then soaked in the beautiful sight of his husband holding their son. He carved that memory into his heart to keep close for the rest of his life. A beautiful, full life he’d built with Dex and their friends. A life he hadn’t thought could be any more blessed until this moment.

A life he’d continue living to the fullest by loving others with his whole heart, just as his friend once taught him. With his husband and son by his side, Serge couldn’t wait to see what came next.

* * *

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