The neighborhood where John’s brother Jude lived with his husband Hendrix was quaint. It fit his brother’s personality. Jude had always preferred peace over extravagance. Luckily, he’d still chosen a much younger and hot husband. Otherwise, John would’ve been forced to disown him. Not really. He loved Jude. John also realized he was lucky to be so close with his only sibling. A lot of people didn’t speak to their siblings at all. John saw his almost daily. Jude owned the company that had made them rich. There’d been no real reason for Jude to bring him onboard, sharing the wealth, other than he wanted to do so. He knew Jude told everyone John had made Green’s Fighter Fuel a success with his massive wheeling and dealing skills, but still, Jude could’ve stopped at giving him a modest salary and kept the rest for himself. Instead, he’d been beyond generous in his salary plus shares, making John a partial owner. Together, they’d worked hard, and it paid off. They were set for life, even if they quit now.

Still, no one would look at this neighborhood and peg Jude as a millionaire. The houses were all single-family homes. They were cute but small. As John jogged up Jude’s front steps, he could picture Jude being happy here. His gaze swung toward the porch swing. It was just big enough for two. An image of Jonah and him filled John’s mind. He could see Jonah tucked against his side, his dark hair reflecting the sunlight while his sexy light-brown gaze held John’s. They could be happy here too—right on top of each other. John knew that was exactly why this place appealed to Jude. He lived here with the love of his life.

Hendrix opened the door before John fell down a rabbit hole in his mind. “Hey.”

John blinked, pulling back from the edge of admitting something to himself he didn’t like to think about. “Hey.”

The tiny strawberry blond who’d stolen his brother’s heart smiled. “Jude called and said you were on your way over. I have to admit, I’m surprised by the invitation to join you today. Don’t you have ten teenagers on speed dial for this?” Hendrix’s light emerald eyes shone bright with mirth as he made the claim.

Only because John knew Hendrix was joking did he laugh. He knew Hendrix thought Jonah was way too young for him. After all, from day one, the guy hadn’t hidden his thoughts. “Only one and he has school today.”

“How is Jonah doing?” Hendrix asked, pulling the door closed behind him.

“He’s good. How are you doing?” About a year and a half earlier, Hendrix had lost a leg. No one could tell it today. He walked without as much as limp in his prosthetic.

“I’m good. Ready for Jude to get back from Texas, but good.”

That was the reason John had chosen Hendrix to go with him today. With Jonah busy and Jude out of town, they needed something to keep them out of trouble. John more than Hendrix, but whatever. “I’m surprised you didn’t go with Jude to Texas,” John said, leading Hendrix to the passenger side of his Hummer. He opened the door for Hendrix.

“I had a doctor’s appointment. I tried rescheduling, but they couldn’t fit me in for three more months. Since I can’t go that long between appointments yet, I had to miss going with Jude.”

Hendrix’s response had a hundred other questions running through John’s mind. He asked each one on the drive to David Baker’s latest location. Jonah was used to John’s nonstop talking. Hendrix wasn’t. By the time they arrived at the organic food restaurant, Hendrix looked ready to stitch John’s lips closed. John knew the look. It was the same one he got from everyone except Jonah.

He tried to hold his tongue to give Hendrix a break. John lasted until they cleared the front door. “There’s our client,” John said, spotting the blond man with graying temples across the room.

David spotted him at the same time and met him halfway. Even the man’s light blue eyes smiled. “John, how are you? I’m glad you could make it.”

John returned the man’s smile as they shook hands. He genuinely liked David. “I’m good. You know I never miss one of your grand openings if I can help it.”

David’s gaze slid Hendrix’s way before moving back to John. “Where’s Jonah?”

A chuckle rose in John’s throat. Jonah would get a kick out of this story. “He has an exam today he couldn’t miss, but he sends his best. You know he hates missing your parties. Luckily, my brother-in-law was free today. David, this is Jude’s husband, Hendrix. Hendrix meet David Baker. David was one of our very first clients.”

They shook hands. David looked genuinely relieved Jonah hadn’t been tossed over. John made a mental note tell Jonah all about this later. No doubt Jonah would listen to the recount with all the patience Hendrix lacked.

“Jude never comes to anything. It’s a good thing John brought you along or we never would’ve met.” David laughed at his own joke.

“You know Jude. He loves working on sponsorships and whatnot, but doesn’t do the parties,” John pointed out, saving Hendrix. He understood Hendrix didn’t usually go to these events.

David nodded. “You know, I don’t think I realized Jonah was still in college,” he said, immediately dismissing Hendrix as someone he’d never see again. “Where does he go?”

“Stanford.”

David’s smile turned even brighter. “My alma mater. What’s his major?”

John’s mind blanked. Did he know? Had he ever asked? Had Jonah ever said?

“He’s studying to be a chemist,” Hendrix said, jumping in.

John’s gaze swung Hendrix’s way. “He is?” Even John heard the disbelief in his tone. He scrambled to hide his ignorance. Luckily, someone else had already snagged David’s attention.

“Excuse me,” David said, getting pulled in the opposite direction. “Please enjoy the party. It was good meeting you, Hendrix.”

John and Hendrix nodded at David. The moment he was out of earshot, John was right back in it. “Is Jonah studying to be a chemist?”

Hendrix shrugged. “How the fuck should I know? I was just trying to save you from looking like a dumbass. It’s obvious that guy likes Jonah, and you were a half second away from having to admit you don’t even know what he’s studying. How do you not know what Jonah’s major is, by the way? How long have you been seeing each other?”

John tried calculating in his head before giving up. “I don’t know. A few years.”

Hendrix shook his head, looking horrified. “Do the two of you ever talk or do you just fuck all the time?”

Although John realized Hendrix wasn’t in love with the whole sugar daddy deal, he hadn’t realized Hendrix felt quite this much distaste over the matter. “We talk.” At least, John talked. Mostly, Jonah listened and interjected just enough to keep John talking. “We’re friends.” Weren’t they? Fuck. Now Hendrix had him questioning everything. He’d do better. Just because John hadn’t realized he was neglecting some aspects of Jonah’s care didn’t mean he couldn’t fix it. “Do you have any plans for the yacht in the next few days?”

Hendrix blinked at the sudden change in topic. “No.”

John gave him a sharp nod. “Good. I think I’ll take it out.” John and Jude split the cost of a yacht and took turns using it. In truth, John used it more than Jude.

Hendrix shook his head and kept his thoughts to himself. That was fine. Once John got an idea, he had to set things in motion or it drove him nuts. He pulled out his phone and shot off a quick text to Jonah.

John: I hope your test went well. When you get home, pack a bag. Make sure you have Cricket ready to go with us too.

Jonah: Why am I packing a bag?

John: We’re taking the yacht out.

No response came for several minutes, setting John’s teeth on edge. By the time his phone buzzed, he was ready to growl and stamp his feet to have his way.

Jonah: I’ll be waiting with bells on.

A smile tugged at John’s lips. They were good. Perfect, in fact. He shouldn’t let a small thing like not knowing Jonah’s major get under his skin. After all, John could spend the next few days asking questions. He could make up for lost time. It wasn’t like he didn’t know Jonah. He knew exactly how to make Jonah moan. That counted for a lot. Didn’t it?

Professor Munich walked with an odd gait that couldn’t be mistaken for anyone else. Strangely, he moved fast for such an old man. By the time Jonah caught up with him, he was practically running to match the man’s pace.

“Professor Munich, hold up.” At his call, Jonah swore he saw the man’s already sagging shoulders droop.

He pushed his glasses up his nose as he turned, waiting for Jonah to reach his side. His gray mustache twitched. Jonah had a bad feeling it was in disgust. “Mr. Young, what can I do for you?”

Jonah didn’t beat around the bush. “Is there any way I can find out my test score early?”

The elderly man sucked in a breath, making a show of how Jonah obviously made him tired. “Is there some reason you can’t wait like the rest of the class?”

“I have to go out of town.”

Dead air stretched between them. Munich rocked back on his heels and clasped his hands in front of him. “Mr. Young, have you ever considered that college might not be for you?” He had, but that still seemed a rude thing to say. Jonah opened his mouth to defend himself. The professor kept talking, cutting him from the conversation. “There are a lot of students who not only manage to make it here every day, they also recognize how lucky they are to be here in the first place. Do you have any idea how many people are denied entry into this university every year?” Jonah didn’t, but he assumed it was a lot, and he recognized the question as rhetorical. “Yet, somehow you slipped through the cracks. To answer your question, I do not yet know your score, but does it matter? Really?”

Jonah dipped his chin, ignoring the tightness in his chest. “Thank you for your time.” It seemed it didn’t matter if he spent the rest of the week on a trip with John. There wasn’t a single soul that believed Jonah had a chance in hell at graduating, including himself.

An odd jolt of nervousness overcame John as he used his elbow to ring Jonah’s doorbell. He fought the urge to feel of his hair and make sure it wasn’t standing on end. Thankfully, he didn’t have a hand to spare. The door swung open. Jonah held Cricket, ensuring the tiny dog couldn’t dart out. His eyes lit as they landed on John. John’s already racing heart skipped a beat. It seemed he should be past this part after almost three years together. He was considerably older than Jonah. Old enough to be his dad, in fact. Jonah wouldn’t want him forever. One day, sooner rather than later, John would truly look his age while Jonah was still young and sexy. Someone closer to his age would turn Jonah’s head and their deal would be at an end. John promised himself he wouldn’t regret Jonah when that day came.

“Hey, gorgeous.”

That day wasn’t today, John reminded himself as Jonah’s sultry voice washed over him. John’s usual smile pulled at his lips at the simple knowledge he’d soon be holding Jonah. “Hey, baby.”

Jonah pushed the screen door open for him. “What’s all that?” Jonah asked, nodding toward the items in John’s hands while struggling to hang on to a wiggling Cricket.

John waited until Jonah closed the door and set Cricket free before holding out the flowers for him. “An assortment of wild flowers to match your spirit, and,” he held out the box, “chocolate cake for my sexy sweetheart.”

“Awww,” Jonah cooed, accepting both. He sniffed the flowers before peering inside the box. “Yum. That smells delicious. You’ll make me fat before long.”

John’s brows snapped together without his permission. “You know I’m not with you because of how you look, right? I don’t care how much you weigh.” It was true. Jonah was so goddamn beautiful on the inside, he could look like anything on the outside and it wouldn’t matter. He’d still be breathtaking.

Jonah winked. “You say that now, because I haven’t eaten this cake yet.” Jonah headed for the kitchen. John tried following, but Cricket scratched the legs of his jeans, slowing him down.

John scooped up the dog and chased after Jonah. “I’m rarely allowed anything good, since I sell health food for a living, but I like making you happy. Eat the cake and don’t think about the calories. Okay?”

After setting the box on the counter, Jonah glanced over, smiling. “I was joking, baby. What’s bothering you today? Did the guy you hired to go with you to the Baker’s party leave you unsatisfied?”

The gibe didn’t help John’s exasperation. Jonah didn’t sound the least bit jealous. John would snap a dude’s neck if he found out anyone else touched Jonah. Yet Jonah joked about John being with someone else as if it didn’t matter. Yeah, for a while, they’d enjoyed some wild times, inviting a third into their relationship and whatnot, but those days were over. At least, he thought they were. “You know I was joking when I said that last night, right? I only wanted you to feel guilty so you’d come with me. I took Hendrix.”

Something flashed in Jonah’s eyes, but he turned away too quickly for John to puzzle it out. Jonah snagged a vase from the cabinet and filled it with water. He kept his gaze locked on his task. “How is Hendrix?”

The hint of sadness in Jonah’s voice bothered John. Something was off about them today. They felt out of rhythm. “He’s fine. How are you?”

“Fine,” Jonah said, flashing him a smile that looked forced to John.

John stroked Cricket’s fur one more time and kissed his head before setting him at his feet. This time when the dog fought to climb him, John stepped over him and closed the distance between Jonah and him. As his chest collided with Jonah’s back, he reached past him and turned off the water. Jonah didn’t move. John could practically feel him holding his breath. The skin peeking out above Jonah’s collar at his shoulder called to John. He dropped his mouth, kissing the bared skin. The sound of Jonah’s breath catching sounded loud in the otherwise silent kitchen. He tugged Jonah’s shirt sleeve, baring more of Jonah’s shoulder. He kissed that spot. Jonah melted into him. John’s dick stirred. He hadn’t meant for the moment to turn sexual. It was Jonah. The man fit so perfectly in John’s arms—like he’d been born to be exactly where John held him. Even their names fit. John and Jonah destined to meet.

John’s palms slid around Jonah’s sides, caressing until they met at Jonah’s stomach. His lips moved higher, lightly brushing until he reached Jonah’s ear. He pressed a light kiss to its shell. “Do you know what I pictured when I saw that cake at the store?”

Jonah sounded a step beyond breathless when he answered. “What?”

John popped the button on Jonah’s shorts. He tugged, pulling open the zipper one tooth at a time, dragging out Jonah’s anticipation. “I saw myself smearing it all over your body before I went down on you and do you know what?”

A whimper escaped Jonah. “What?”

“You made it taste twice as sweet,” John said, pushing Jonah’s shorts down before exploding into action. He snagged Jonah around the hips and spun him before easily lifting him onto the counter. “I’m too old to get on my knees.” That was all the explanation John offered before he bent and sucked Jonah. Jonah cried out as his cock slipped down John’s throat. Jonah whipped off his shirt before scratching at John’s shoulders. He leaned back as far as the cabinets hanging behind him would let him and pumped against John’s lips. John chuckled around Jonah’s dick. He knew he had the man trapped in an awkward position, making it impossible for Jonah to control the rhythm. John liked having Jonah at his mercy. Maybe bad knees came with age, but so did patience and skill. He licked and sucked, hollowing out his cheeks and going for quick results. When he felt Jonah’s muscles tense, he pulled away and captured the man’s lips. An evil chuckle rose in his throat when Jonah tried biting him in his frustration. His cock twitched in his jeans. He wanted to bury himself in Jonah and never come up for air. Right now, he needed to let Jonah know, in the only way he could, this was more than a deal between them. John could never say the words. When Jonah left him for someone his own age, John didn’t want him to feel guilty. But he needed Jonah to remember that John had made him happy while they were together. Jonah needed to remember John had worked hard for them every day.

After a quick nip at Jonah’s bottom lip, John flipped open the cake box and swiped at the icing. He held his finger out to Jonah. Jonah didn’t disappoint. While holding John’s stare with his hungry gaze, he closed his lips around John’s finger and sucked. John’s dick leaked in his jeans like it was the thing in Jonah’s mouth. John lured Jonah’s forward as Jonah continued licking away the icing. The moment he was within striking distance, John recaptured the man’s mouth, savoring the flavor of chocolate lingering on Jonah’s tongue.

“Mhmm,” John hummed. “Damn. It’s even better than I imagined.” He swiped at the icing again. This time, he dragged the mess down Jonah’s cock before going down on him again.

As male salt and chocolate coated his taste buds, Jonah tugged at his hair, taking his pleasure. Moans filled the air, making John twice as horny.

“Jesus, John. Yes.” Damn, he loved the way his name sounded in that tone. “Just like that. Oh my god.”

John thought he’d blow in his jeans just from the sounds Jonah made. He was so sexy. It never got old pleasuring him. He doubled his efforts, massaging Jonah’s balls and asshole as he bobbed on his dick.

Jonah’s fingers dug into his shoulders. “Don’t stop.” A whimper rang from the walls. A cry followed. Cum flooded his mouth and rolled down his chin. John swallowed as fast as he could while Jonah rocked against his tongue, riding out every wave. John kissed a path up Jonah’s stomach, swiping his face on the man’s skin. When he reached Jonah’s mouth, Jonah accepted his kiss and the taste of his own cum without hesitation. John’s lust skyrocketed. He had no intention of acting on it, though. This was all about Jonah. John had some making up to do. Hendrix made him realize he’d been selfish. That ended today. John made a silent vow. By the time they were finished with this trip, he would know all there was to know about Jonah, and Jonah would be first from now on.

On his stomach, nude, and sprawled across John’s lap in bed, Jonah wondered if his dick would ever work again. He was completely drained, and John was still teasing him. They’d turned a movie on half an hour ago. The rocking of the boat tried putting him to sleep. John’s touch kept him awake. His fingers dug into Jonah’s lower back, massaging before moving lower. He skimmed Jonah’s crack before rubbing his cheeks and moving back to his lower back. The man’s huge erection kept tapping his side. Jonah had no clue how John was still hard. He knew he should try harder to make John as tired as he was, but Jonah couldn’t move. Exhaustion and John’s hands on his skin kept him paralyzed.

“You’re beautiful,” John whispered as he skimmed Jonah’s crack again. This time, he delved deeper, pressing on Jonah’s asshole with the perfect amount of pressure. “I could touch you all night.” He fingered Jonah’s ass as he made the claim.

A pant escaped Jonah. Despite being half dead, his dick stirred. “You’re killing me. Tell me what you need and it’s yours.”

“Tell me how your test went.”

“About as well as can be expected,” Jonah answered, blowing off the question.

John’s fingers disappeared and reappeared wet, easily slipping inside him. A moan choked Jonah. He massaged at the perfect angle. Jonah fought the urge to hump John’s lap. “What’s that supposed to mean? Tell me again what you’re studying.”

It was like some new age torture method. John toyed with his body while talking about things Jonah didn’t care to discuss. “It means I probably failed. Engineering is my major.”

John froze. Jonah whimpered. At the sound, John went back to playing. “Why engineering?”

Jonah turned his head and twisted at an angle so he could see John’s face. “Why the sudden interest?”

John shrugged. “I’m curious. You don’t strike me as the engineering type. I mean, that doesn’t sound interesting and you’re interesting.”

A chuckle shook Jonah’s body. It turned into a moan as John’s fingers pushed deeper. “Jesus. Like that.” Jonah couldn’t have stopped the plea if he tried. John knew how to make him beg. “If I make you fly, will you promise to come to Mom’s with me on Sunday for Mother’s Day?”

Jonah considered biting him. “You don’t have to fucking tease me for that. Of course I’ll go.”

John froze again. “Wait. What about your mom? I’ve never met her. Are you ashamed of me?”

Some things were more important than getting off. The hurt in John’s voice had Jonah crawling away from his touch and shifting onto his knees facing John. “No, baby. I could never be ashamed of you.” He straddled John’s lap and kissed his neck. “Don’t say anything like that again.” He moved down John’s body. It was time for him to take care of that huge erection that had been trying to get his attention. He had to distract John from this line of questioning. They couldn’t talk about his mom. Jonah never wanted John to know that ugliness. They were beautiful. He had to keep this one place where he was good enough.

Jonah hadn’t answered him. It was the first time John had ever noticed it was intentional. Even though Jonah claimed he wasn’t ashamed, his actions said otherwise. There had to be a reason Jonah wasn’t really answering his questions. People only did that when they were hiding something. He didn’t want to be the something Jonah hid.

Jonah moved lower down the bed, kissing John’s stomach and heading for his erection. John couldn’t let that happen. He wasn’t stupid enough to think he could stand against Jonah once the guy had John’s dick in his mouth. Jonah was too perfect. He knew exactly how to keep John.

“I’m trying to talk to you,” John said with a laugh, tugging Jonah back into his lap.

Jonah huffed as he settled in and wrapped his arms around John’s neck. He looked adorably frustrated as he held John’s stare. “Why do you want to know all this?” Even though Jonah still had the same playful tone, there was something else John couldn’t pinpoint tinging his voice.

“Because I care,” John said, refusing to back down. “You don’t talk to me about school or your family. It’s like you don’t really want me to be part of your life.”

Jonah’s smile fell. “Of course I want you in my life. Trust me, you really don’t want to know this.” There it was. That hidden tone was full-on now. Jonah wasn’t joking. He didn’t want to tell John anything.

John had to know. “Yes I do.”

“Okay,” Jonah said, scooting closer so their erections bumped. “If you have to know, there’s no sense in doing anything for my mom for Mother’s Day. She won’t accept anything from me. She also hasn’t spoken a word to me in five years. I still go see her every few months, so she can ignore me in person, but—after this last time—I think I’m done trying.” John’s stomach dropped at the matter-of-fact way Jonah talked about something that obviously hurt him. Jonah kept going. “It also doesn’t matter how I did on my test. There’s no chance in hell I’ll graduate this year. I think I’m done trying to force that too.”

“Why?”

Jonah shrugged. “Why what? Why does my mom hate me or why am I failing? The answer for both is probably the same. Maybe I’m just a failure.”

“Okay. Now that’s bullshit,” John said, feeling his temper slip.

Jonah ignored him. “My mom had a beautiful life planned out for me where I married the girl I dated through high school and had lots of kids. Then, she found out that girl had boy parts, and—suddenly—I was no longer her child. As to school, I tried my best, but I’ve missed too many days to keep up. All the passed tests in the world can’t save me now.”

John shook his head. “What do you mean you’ve missed too many days? You’re always there.” At least, it felt like Jonah was always at school. He couldn’t touch the story about Jonah’s mom yet. He was too enraged.

A bright smile lit Jonah’s face. It was completely at odds with his earlier tone. “Where do you think I’m supposed to be today, John? Or tomorrow? Or the week we were in Cancun, or when we went to France or Greece?” Jonah shrugged. “I tried, but it didn’t work out for me. It’s okay. I never really wanted to be an engineer. My guidance counselor chose what he thought would be my best path with the scholarships I received. I’m not good at it.” Jonah shrugged. “In truth, I’m not good at anything. I’m a terrible student and an even worse son. Maybe I’ll just go out and get a job so I can be bad at that too.”

It was worse than Hendrix made things out to be. John was beyond selfish. He hadn’t once considered Jonah’s needs. In fact, he’d never even asked if Jonah needed to be elsewhere. He’d simply given Jonah instructions on when to be ready to go—like a paid employee.

John couldn’t find his voice. Self-hatred sat on his windpipe.

Jonah shook his head when John didn’t speak. A sad smile touched his lips. “I told you that you didn’t want to hear it.” He leaned in and kissed John’s neck. John held him there, seeing nothing. He’d failed Jonah. The massive revelation overwhelmed John. He loved Jonah. In fact, he had for a long time, but now he realized—if he loved him—John needed to act like it and get out of Jonah’s way. As long as they were together, John would always want to come first. He was spoiled like that. Jonah would never make a place for himself in the world with an old man like John hanging around his neck, weighing him down. So this was it. It hurt worse than he’d ever expected. He’d enjoy this final trip with Jonah, and then he’d set the man free. Jonah would be great at whatever he did in life, but he’d never find out what that was with John around, stealing everything from him. As he accepted Jonah’s kiss, John’s heart shattered in his chest. No matter what, Jonah would always be the greatest love of his life. But from here on, he’d love him from a distance.

Jonah pulled away when John didn’t react to his kiss. “Do you think so badly of me that you’ll ignore me now?” Jonah asked, looking hurt.

John’s fingers found Jonah’s hair. He stroked. “I could never think badly of you, baby.” With a roll and a tuck, he had Jonah pinned beneath him. He poured every ounce of his hurt and longing into their kiss. If this was their last trip, he wanted Jonah to have nothing but good memories. He wanted Jonah to remember how John loved him like no one else ever would. He loved Jonah so much, he’d move out of his way.