"All this time I've had these," she was saying as her voice floated down from the rafters. "And I never really thought through how I would listen to them."

"You okay up there?" I was holding the ladder and trying not to sneak peeks at her round, nicely curved ass. We were both wedged in a closet in her second bedroom, the only access point to her attic a panel in the ceiling. If she stumbled, my hands were right there to grab her. Which might be a problem.

"I'm fine." She was a body without a head as she poked around in the crawlspace. "I think... yeah this is it."

I heard a scrape and then a thud and then she made a triumphant noise. "Here it is!' she cried, banging the ancient tape recorder against the rungs so close to my head it made my hair ruffle.

"How old it this thing?" I wondered, deftly taking it from her before she brained me. "It looks pure 70s."

"1980 exactly, as a matter of fact," she corrected, hopping down off the ladder. "Apparently it was the height of technology because of these." She pointed.

"A dual deck, nice."

She trundled the ladder out of the closet and set it against the wall. Then she looked at me with those big eyes of hers. There was atightness in her smile, but she was smiling and that was good enough to make me smile back. "Are you ready?"

I took a deep breath. My first instinct was to scoff. Of course I was. Except. "I'm not sure," I confessed, letting my breath out in a long, slow inhale.

"You're worried you're going to hate it?"

"How did you know?"

"I feel the same way. I always wondered why Gid didn't - "

"Do something with it?"

"I mean he did, back in the day, but this is recent stuff. Stuff he'd been working on..."

"Until he died," I finished. "And whatever his plans were got cut short." My tongue felt too thick in my mouth.

"Yeah," she said, looking down.

I took a deep breath, needing to force the words past my own possessiveness. "Are you really okay with me hearing them?" I asked her.

She widened her eyes. I nodded and swallowed, enunciating each word so that I was sure to hear them too. "I was pissed," I said. "Yesterday. Because I was like, why would Gid give them to her and not me? But then I realized, whatever claim I felt like I had to this music was less than the claim you had. He gave it to you. And," I let out a long, slow breath. "And I wasn't around."

She lifted that pretty, heart-shaped face of hers and for a second her clear, perfect beauty made me stupid. "I'm glad I'm around now though," I finished.

"I'm okay with it," she repeated, looking a little defensive. "That's why I told you about it yesterday and - "

"I was an ass?" I supplied.

The corner of her mouth twitched. "In so many words."

"I'm sorry about that." I shook my head. "I knew I'd be sad about losing him. I didn't expect to be so pissed off too."

Ruby's lip slipped between her teeth and for a moment the only thing that mattered was watching the way her teeth dragged a white line across the red. "Grief is weird," she finally said. "Brings out the worst in people."

"And the best."

"How do you figure?"

I swallowed. "I would have never known what an incredible person you were if Gid hadn't died."

Her blush started across her chest, on that small patch of creamy skin made visible by her ribbed tank top. I watched, mesmerized, until I realized it looked like I was staring right at her breasts.

I flicked my eyes back up to meet hers and was relieved to see that she was looking away and hadn't caught me staring at how pink and lovely she looked right now. "Should we listen then?"

"Let's," I said, nodding.

I followed her and her ancient tape recorder into the small, spartan living room. Ruby plopped herself right down on the floor and opened her arms to let the wayward Ginger settle herself into a purring ball in the center of her lap. "Pull up a patch of floor," she instructed, twisting to plug the player in. "You can pick the first tape."

I looked into the box that sat in the center of her floor and hesitated. I reached for one, then put it down, then another, and another...

"Close your eyes," she said, her voice calm and gentle. "Just grab the first one you touch."

I nodded and did what she said. I didn't open them when I grabbed the tape either. I just handed it right to her. "This one."

"Okay." She popped the tape player open and slid it in.

I opened my eyes. "What does it say in it? Did he leave a note? A track listing?"

"Sssh, Jonah." She pressed play.

A hissing crackle filled the air and then the soft strum of a guitar. I leaned a little close, realizing I was holding my breath and then realizing again that my hand was on Ruby's knee.

She looked down at it, but she didn't move.

A flurry of finger picking now, the notes falling like water and reminding me a bit of Crown Creek as it leaped and burbled. It was silent and frozen right now, but this music was just like the sound of summer, the little trilling splashes that made the woods sound like they were whispering secrets to themselves.

And then Gid's voice started and Ruby's hand slipped over mine.

It was just humming at first. A couple of 'woo-woos," and then some "hey-heys," and then more humming as he found his melody. I recognized it from my own process, the way you feel around the edges of a song before you can dive in all the way.

"Don't want to lose you," Gid's voice rang out as clear as if it were in my own head. I glanced at Ruby.

"It's him," she whispered, and there were tears in her eyes.

"Don't want to lose you," Gid repeated, and there was a clanking sound like his fingers slipped. He coughed and I swallowed to hear it, the raw, aching emotion in his voice. What had made him write this song? What heartache had he felt that I wasn't around to know about? What problem had he had that I couldn't be there with him through, to hand him a drink and sit with him down by the place where the creek bends around our property line, listening to the water, helping the problems he was having falling away in the silence because all he needed was to know was his nephew was there?

A tear was slipping quietly down Ruby's cheek. She wasn't making a sound and seemed like she was holding her breath. I squeezed her hand as the music started again. "The best chance at love was the one I never took," Gid sang.

Sang right to me.

It wasn't a coincidence. It couldn't be a coincidence that I picked this tape. My heart was beating faster now. Another tear tracked down Ruby's cheek and this time I didn't hesitate. I reached out and caught it at the edge of my finger.

She looked at me now and I heard her suck in her breath.

I brushed my finger on her other cheek, catching the wetness as Gideon strummed. She closed her eyes and another tear slipped out.

I leaned forward and pressed my lips to her cheek, catching it before it fell. Her small sound made my heart beat faster. I followed that trail reverently up to her closed eyes which I kissed one after the other.

"You gave me a chance, how many chances can I get?" wondered Gideon's crackling voice on the tape player. "Before I lose my last best chance at love?"