Kitt

My heart was in my throat as Switch stood in the doorway. I took in every detail. The smolder in his eyes. The way he smelled. Strong. Masculine. But somehow broken underneath all of it.

“What is it?” I asked.

He shook his head. His eyes had an amber glow to them. He was here but not here. I was lonely. God. I’d been so lonely my whole life. Whatever was going on with him, he’d come here. Now. To me. I reached for him, took his hand, and pulled him inside the room.

Switch held a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand. The liquid sloshed as he took a step forward. He wasn’t drunk. Not yet. Not fully. But he was on his way.

I’d heard enough murmuring and hushed whispers at the garage to know that there was something brewing in the club. Twice around town, when I mentioned where I worked, I got downcast eyes and fake smiles.

“Is someone hurt?” I asked. Switch looked around. He put the liquor bottle on the dresser by the door. Now that he was inside, it was as if he couldn’t remember why he’d come. He ran a hand through his hair.

“It’s nothing,” he said. “I just wanted to see how your first week went.”

I cocked my head to the side. He was lying.

“Something’s wrong with you. Did something happen to one of the guys?”

He shook his head. “No. It’s just …”

“Switch, come on. You didn’t come here just to check up on me. You’re half drunk. Please don’t tell me you were riding your bike like that.”

“No, God, no. I was out in the lot.”

“The parking lot?” I went to the window and pulled the curtain back. Sure enough, Switch’s Harley was parked at an odd angle at the opposite side of the Hansen’s parking lot.

“Were you watching me?” I asked. The idea of it warmed me. This guy was acting on me like a drug. It was like I couldn’t think straight around him.

“I thought it would be easy,” he said. “I thought I could just sit across from him and lay it all out. I thought he wouldn’t be able to touch me anymore.”

He was talking in riddles. I sank to the edge of the bed, looking up at him. This big, strong, tough guy. He looked so ragged, like he was about to fall apart.

“Tell me what happened.” I reached for his hand, pulling him until he sat beside me. Switch lifted a hand and smoothed the hair away from my face. His eyes flickered, taking me in. What did he see?

“You shouldn’t hang around me,” he said. “You should be with some college guy. A lawyer. A doctor. Someone clean.”

I let out a short laugh. “Are you serious? Switch, you’re freaking me out a little. Something happened to you. I can see it in your eyes. You came here for a reason and don’t tell me you’re just checking up on me. I know it’s more than that.”

He dropped his head. His shoulders sagged. What in the world could cut this big, strong guy down like this?

“I went to see my pops today,” he said. “Mad Max Madison.”

I shifted, turning to face Switch full on. “Your father?”

“He’s a loser, Kitt. I’ve spent my whole life trying to outrun the trail of destruction he left behind. Do you have any idea what that’s like?”

My heart turned to ash. I couldn’t breathe. “Yeah,” I finally said. “I know a little of what that’s like, Switch.”

“He’s in prison,” he said. “Got busted selling dope when I was twelve years old. Then he killed a guy on the inside in a prison fight. He’s in for murder. Life. But even before all that, he ran out on my mom. He wouldn’t make a clean break though. Kept coming back just enough so she kept hanging on. She loved the bastard until the day she died. She spent her last breath asking for his sorry ass. Even though I was the one by her side. I took care of her.”

I put a hand to his cheek. Oh God. “I’m sorry,” I said. “That must have been awful. How old were you?”

He lifted his eyes. They were so full of pain. Pain that I knew well. “I was seventeen when she passed. A man already.”

“No,” I said. “You were just a kid. And you were all alone.”

He brought his hand up, pulling mine gently away from his face. Heat burned through me. His skin seared mine. I wanted to bear his pain, take it from him, join it with my own.

“No,” he said. “I’ve never been alone. I always had the club. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Sly gave me a purpose. He gave me a life. In spite of my old man. He didn’t have to do that. Hell, club rules said he couldn’t. But he did anyway.”

“What about club rules?”

“My old man turned on the club.”

“Against the Wolves?” I asked.

“Yeah. Blackie Murphy’s sergeant-at-arms. He got greedy. Started dealing. Like I said, he got clipped for that. He’d be out already if it weren’t for what he did when he went in. He’s been up for parole once or twice. I hope he never gets out.”

“But that’s your father’s life. Not yours.”

Switch’s eyes went stone cold as he held mine. “Mad Max turned rat. He gave intel to the feds against the club to cut his sentence so he could at least get the chance for parole. You have to understand. Those were different times. A generation ago. Blackie ran things differently than Sly does. We’re legit now. But back then ... Max’s testimony put two club members from the Emerald Coast charter behind bars. One of them died there, murdered by a rival club member a few months after he went in. That’s on Max’s head too.”

“I’m so sorry,” I said. “But, Switch. I still don’t see why you think you have to carry that burden? Your father made his own mistakes. They don’t reflect on you.”

Switch smiled. “No. Not now. Not since Sly took the gavel.”

“Sly,” I said, my tone turning bitter. It burned in me to tell Switch why Sly Cullinan wasn’t the man he thought he was. He wasn’t some savior or white knight.

“I’m sorry,” Switch said. “I didn’t mean to come here and just lay all this on you. It’s nothing you have to worry about.”

“So why did you go see your father now? Today of all days?”

“Because my pops may not keep his promises, but I do.”

It was a cryptic answer, but all he would say. The pain came back into his eyes, deep and fathomless. God, I knew that pain so well. It stirred my own. So much about Switch stirred things in me.

“It’s okay,” I said, feeling like he needed to hear it.

When I reached for him, Switch caught my hand. It was a dare. As if he meant to challenge me. If I touched him again, how far was I willing to go?

The answer quickened my pulse. Lust pooled in my core. Switch Madison was a dangerous man. It was almost as if I could feel my DNA racing through my veins along with everything else. Like I was hardwired to be attracted to a guy like Switch.

Except ... as his eyes locked with mine, I felt like I could see straight through to his soul. He was a dangerous man. But a good one. I knew it. And he was still in so much pain. Pain I understood.

If Switch had just issued a challenge, I accepted it, breathless, fighting through so much pain of my own.

Every ounce of me craved him. His touch drew me in like a magnet pull. Raw need thundered through me, making me weak. When Switch’s lips met mine, he tasted so good. Rough stubble tickled my cheek. My nerve endings ignited. God. He felt like the best kind of sin.

Switch slid off the bed. He was on his knees between my legs. I bent down, keeping his lips locked with mine. His hands roamed; finding the hem of my top, he slid them under. I gasped as his bare hands made contact with the sensitive skin just below my breasts. Oh God, yes. I wanted it. I wanted it all.

“Kitt,” he whispered.

I laced my fingers through his hair, pulling him even closer to me. This was wrong. We should wait. Switch was a little drunk. Not drunk enough. He was needy. Oh, but so was I.

He pulled back, staring at me, his eyes flickering. It was an unspoken question. He would leave the choice to me. Switch Madison was a dangerous man, but it turned out, an honorable one.

I rose to my feet. Switch stayed where he was, on his knees in front of me. He slid his arms around my waist. I cradled his head against my stomach. Then, I slowly sank to my knees right along with him.

Switch slipped out of his leather cut. Heavy and substantial, it landed on the ground with a thud. Then he pulled his tee shirt over his head. My jaw dropped. He was magnificent. Hard-cut muscles. Beautiful black, blue, and red ink covered almost his entire chest and back and most of his arms. I let my fingers play along the designs. The most prominent by far was the black wolf’s head, howling toward his heart.

“You’re beautiful,” I said.

He smiled. “Baby, that’s not what most people say.”

I grew bold, kissing a trail up his chest. I worked my way around to his back. He had scars along with the ink. I wanted to draw every bit of pain he’d ever felt out of him. I came around to the front. Switch hooked his fingers through mine and he pulled us both to our feet. He stood still as stone as I reached for his heavy leather belt and unhooked it. I peeled his jeans off. He stepped out of them.

I couldn’t get enough of him. He was sculpted perfection. Instinct drove me. I cupped a gentle hand under his balls, marveling at the size of him. Oh yes, I wanted it all.

“Your turn,” he said, his tone turning wicked. I was absolutely on fire. My sex pulsed with need. Switch had been slow and graceful. I was clumsy, hurried as I took off my top and wriggled out of my jeans.

It thrilled me to be naked in front of him. Switch was gentle. There was a chill in the air, making my nipples stand on end. He thumbed each of them, making me gasp with pleasure. He liked that.

What had he made of me? This wasn’t like me. I wasn’t bold like this. Daring. Wanton. But something about this man made me want to give him so much.

He cupped his hand on my ass, drawing me close to him. “Do you have any idea how fucking sexy you are?” he said.

No one had ever told me that. I’d always felt gawky. In high school, the boys called me a string bean.

Switch lowered his lips to me. I threw my head back and swayed on my feet as he licked his way up my rib cage then swirled his tongue around each of my breasts. He slid a hand between my thighs, finding me slick, ready.

“I want you,” he said.

“Yes,” I gasped. “Yes.”

With one quick, strong move, he had me off my feet. He made me dizzy as he threw me gently to the bed and my legs parted as if he’d trained me for it.

“Show me,” he said. He was stroking himself as he stood between my legs. I knew just what he meant. I couldn’t believe I was about to obey.

I spread my legs wide, letting him see it all. Then I mirrored his movements, stroking myself in front of him while he watched and his eyes flashed with lust. I dipped two fingers inside me. I was so wet. So ready.

Switch was ready too. He reached down and pulled his wallet out of his jeans. Smooth as silk, he slipped on a condom and positioned himself between my legs.

“You’re so damn beautiful,” he said. “Do you know that? You should see yourself. Come here. I want you to see yourself.”

He pulled me off the bed. My legs were shaking. He walked me to the bathroom and flicked the lights on. He stood behind me, stroking my breasts. He lifted my chin until I could see myself in the mirror.

I almost didn’t recognize myself. I was flushed with desire. My breasts swollen. My skin looked so soft and pale next to Switch’s dark complexion and bold ink.

“Beauty and the beast,” he whispered, nipping my ear.

His hands went back between my legs. It was the most erotic thing I’d ever done. With the lights on and the mirror in front of me, I watched as Switch Madison worked me into a lather. My breasts heaved. My nipples went wine-dark and peaked. Then Switch nudged me forward. He had me bent over. I leaned with my elbows on the counter. He made it so I could see everything.

Then, finally, he slid inside me.

“Oh God!” I gasped. He was so big. So perfect. And it all felt so good.

I watched as Switch stroked me from the front as he made love to me. Every part of me was tuned to him. He controlled my pleasure. He gave it to me. I gripped the counter and let go. Switch’s sultry laugh spurred me on.

I came. It was an explosion of pleasure and light. It took my breath away. Switch was gentle, but commanding. He guided me through it. Then he took his own pleasure. I went up on my toes to take him all in.

Switch kept his hands on my hips, positioning me so he went in deep and strong.

I hadn’t planned it. It was probably a mistake. But that night, Switch Madison became my world. Somehow, I’d have to find a way to tell him the truth.

Later, I felt awkward as Switch slid out of me. He pulled me to him, kissing my forehead. “You’re incredible,” he said.

“No.” I smiled up at him. “You are.”

I felt safe and warm in Switch’s arms. I didn’t mean to fall asleep. But before I knew what was happening, the sun started to poke through the gap in the curtains. For a moment, I didn’t know where I was. Then Switch’s rhythmic breathing nearly lulled me back to sleep. I pulled the cover over me and slipped out of his arms.

I wanted to look at him forever. He slept on his back, one arm over his head. He called me beautiful but that’s exactly what he was. He started to wake. Smiling when he realized where he was, he curled me against him, tracing lines over my shoulders. I grew drowsy. Still, I wanted more. Under Switch’s gentle touch, I felt my desire rising again.

Just as I was about to turn to kiss him, his cell phone went off. He pushed his head back against the pillow in a sigh.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I can’t ignore that. Hell, what time is it?”

“It’s okay,” I said, coming into myself a little. “It’s early. Not even seven, I don’t think.” I grew shy, pulling the sheets up to cover myself. Switch frowned when I did it.

He fished his phone out of his pocket. As the caller started to talk, his frown deepened. Switch rubbed his eyes and finger-combed his hair.

“I understand,” was all he said. Then he clicked off the phone and pulled on his jeans.

“What is it?” I asked, knowing I shouldn’t.

“Trouble,” he said, his tone grave. “Stay here. No matter what you hear. I’m ... sorry. I wouldn’t just leave you like this after ...”

“It’s really okay,” I said. “We can talk later.”

Nodding, he kissed me again. He pulled on his shirt and his cut. My heart flipped as I watched him slide his Nine into his hip holster. He’d been so smooth before, I hadn’t even noticed he was armed.

“I’ll be back,” he promised.

I nodded, my words were gone. Then he left.

Yes. Switch Madison was a dangerous man. But his pain called to mine.