JENN
I got off the plane and immediately scanned the airport crowd for the one person I knew would always be there to welcome me home - Tyler, my stepbrother.
A few years ago, my mom and dad had divorced and moved to opposite ends of the country, Mom to sunny California, while Dad had stayed in New York. Each of them had remarried and started a new family as the years passed. Susan, my mom, ended up with Mark, a man who I swear was exactly like my dad. Jack, my dad, ended up with Lauren, a woman who was radically different from my down-to-earth, head-screwed-on-right mom. Lauren came into the marriage with a bonus – her son, Tyler, who was only two years older than me.
I developed an instant crush on Tyler the first time I met him five years ago, but that crush never blossomed into anything meaningful because Tyler was too busy with older girls to pay attention to my subtle flirtations. As the years passed, we settled into a nice sibling relationship, and even though I was happy we got along so well, it pained me that my need for him would never be reciprocated. Thankfully, I had been accepted into the University of California, so I didn’t have to deal with seeing with him on the East Coast until my winter break since I usually spent summers with Mom. I was excited to be back in New York for the winter holidays, not necessarily because of my dad, which was important, of course, but more importantly, because I would be spending a few weeks with Tyler.
I didn’t have to look too long. Someone grabbed me from behind and held me against his body. “Guess who?”
I smiled as I caught the familiar whiff of Tyler’s cologne. I relaxed and played along. “My boyfriend?”
Tyler paused for a second and then burst out laughing. “Yeah right.”
“What’s so funny?”
“You, Jenn, have a boyfriend?”
“Why not?” I pulled myself out of his grip and turned. My heart skipped a couple of beats at the familiar handsome features of the boy I wanted so much. Gosh, I had missed him.
“You’re so uptight I don’t think any boy would dare come near you,” he grinned, his smile hitting me in the core and spreading warmth through my body. Yes, even a simple smile from him could do that much damage to me!
“That’s what you think,” I replied, wanting so much to kiss him but refraining and hoping my eyes didn’t betray my need.
“So prove me wrong. Do you have a boyfriend?” He stepped so close to me I could almost touch him.
“I don’t want one,” I said, playfully pushing him away from me. In reality, I really wanted him to hold me tighter and longer.
“Yeah right,” he smiled.
“Not every girl wants to fuck the first man she sees.” I said the word “fuck” in a whisper, glancing around, afraid someone might have heard me.
“See, you can’t even say the word fuck without freezing up,” he replied in a rather loud voice.
“Stop,” I said in mock shame, putting my hands over my eyes like that would make the people staring at us disappear.
“Why? You don’t like the attention?”
“Not that sort. Come on, let’s get out of here,” I said, half dragging him away from the crowd.
“If you say so, but I still think fuck is an okay word to say.”
I burst into laughter. Tyler laughed with me. He stopped suddenly and pulled me to him again, giving me a tight bear hug.
“I missed you, sis. Welcome home,” he said as he disengaged himself from the hug and threw his arm over my shoulders so we could walk towards the parking garage. We settled in Tyler’s car and into a comfortable silence as we navigated out of the airport traffic.
“What do you mean I’m so uptight?” I asked, breaking the silence as the car pulled out of the airport. I knew what he meant, but I needed to tease him just for the heck of it.
“Well, I don’t see you ever being with a man,” he said with a smile curving his face.
“Are you suggesting I’d rather be with a woman?”
“Nothing wrong with that,” he grinned. “I’m just saying you’re too good to fuck around.”
“Wow. That’s not a very brotherly thing to say. How’s my sex life even your concern?” I asked, smiling at him. I was glad he was interested in talking about sex with me, but from previous experience, the sex talk always turned into him preaching at me to avoid boys because all they wanted was sex from girls. That talk had worked when I was in high school. I was now in college and determined to turn our current sex talk into something more adult.
“You’re my baby sister,” he replied as if that justified his words.
“You know I’m in college, right? You can’t tell me what to do with my pussy,” I said.
“Oh boy! One year in college and you’re talking dirty. Where did my innocent sister go?” he mocked.
I smiled and hit him playfully. “Just drive the fucking car. Let’s get home.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Tyler smiled as he entered the highway. “So, how was school? I assume you’ve been hanging out with terrible company.”
“You’re not going to give up, are you?” I said. I picked up the conversation about school, and for a while, we exchanged stories about our year at school. As he talked, I did my best to focus on the conversation at hand and ignore the fact that he had grown leaner and more muscular since the last time I saw him. I knew he worked out a lot in the gym, and those hours were finally showing on his body. Could he get more perfect?
“So what about Amber?” Amber was his girlfriend the last time I checked.
“Oh, we broke up,” he said.
“That was fast,” I replied, laughing. “Have you honestly ever dated anyone more than a few weeks?”
“I think so,” Tyler said, making a mock face like he was thinking. “Yeah, a few of them have made it past one week. You’ll be surprised to know that Amber lasted the whole summer.”
I grinned. “I bet she could do it like a rock star.”
“Shut up,” Tyler said, smacking me gently on my thigh. His light touch, even though playful, took me by surprise and caused a tingle to shoot through my body. “Well, at least she’s not going to be a thirty-year old virgin,” he said, grinning.
“You have a point.” I smiled at him. If only he knew! If he knew how much I wanted more than just a stepsister-stepbrother relationship with him. If only he knew that I was saving myself for him. I knew it was inappropriate to lust after him as much as I did, and when we were growing up, I thought I’d outgrow it. I hadn’t, and it had gotten worse. Now, even a mere playful touch from him stirred up those feelings. I was screwed big time!