NINETEEN
The next couple days passed by in a soft, pleasurable blur.
Admittedly, neither of them got much sleep. Between bouts of sex, they rested, but only for a couple hours before what Vaxa called ‘the mating call’ began again. Kate had woken numerous times to Vaxa licking between her thighs and in turn, she’d woken him with the same pleasure. She’d lost count how many times they’d had sex, how many orgasms she’d had.
She was sore and achy, but damn she felt good.
They ate simply during their stay: dried meats and odd, delicious fruits and a kind of fermented bread that tasted surprisingly good and kept her satiated. It was enough to fuel them. And every morning and evening, Vaxa would lead her outside towards the mountain and they would bathe in a natural pool, tucked between two tall, jutting rocks.
It was in that pool that he answered her various questions about Luxiria. She learned that the city—called the Golden City, once translated into English—where they lived was just a fraction of their population. Spread across the planet were six outposts, all watched over by Vaxa’s trusted war generals and advisors, all of whom he’d completed military training with. She’d already met Rixavox, Lihvan, and Kirov. All three of them governed separate outposts. She had yet to meet the other three.
Vaxa said that he’d take her to visit each of them. Apparently, each outpost was widespread enough that the landscape changed drastically, as did the weather.
And then he’d told her about military training, how all Luxirian males were expected to enter once they reached the age of ten rotations, which she’d deduced were years.
“Ten?” she’d asked, aghast, when they’d discussed it. “But that’s so young!”
She couldn’t fathom a mere boy entering something so brutal, which, after Vaxa’s descriptions of military training, it was. Like the fighting pit on the spaceship, only with young men, not grown, muscled warriors.
Vaxa had simply shrugged. “Five completed rotations are required of every Luxirian male. After that, they can decide if they will continue with training or find a different vocation at one of the outposts.”
“And how many stay?”
“Perhaps over half. Luxirians are born warriors. It is in our blood.”
Briefly, in the back of her mind, she thought, And what if we have a son? She wouldn’t want her child to go through something like that. It would scare the living hell out of her.
“And how many…rotations is military training?”
“Twelve.”
Twelve years. Her eyes strayed to the scars across his chest and back. He’d told her about the beatings by some of the older war generals. In military training, they hadn’t cared that he was the Prime Leader’s son. Being the Prime Leader’s son wouldn’t make him any more impervious to death as his peers, he’d told her, and so he was punished alongside them, as their equals.
He must’ve seen her distress because he smoothed a hand down her cheek. “This is normal, luxiva. It is our culture. It is a source of pride for our males and it is the greatest of honors to complete the training.”
“What about those who don’t?” Like Bidan. Vaxa had said something about him not continuing with military training and chose to serve his family instead. “Are they discriminated against?”
The way his lips pressed together told her that yes, to a certain extent, they were. “There are some who think this way, yes. But the majority do not. Without them, our society would fall. Not all can be warriors. We need hunters, fuelers, researchers, traders, builders. Luxiria would collapse in their absence.”
The conversation had made her feel restless and uneasy, so she was slightly relieved when Vaxa changed topics and asked her about Earth.
In turn, she told him about where she lived—Chicago—and what her city was like, with its skyscrapers and bustling sidewalks. She told him about Navy Pier and her favorite coffee shop and her best friend, Beks. She told him about winter, about snow, which he seemed fascinated by. She guessed it didn’t snow on Luxiria, although he did mention something that sounded like rain. He was fascinated about everything she told him and it had taken her a good half hour to explain what coffee was, much to her amused delight.
Talking about Earth made her heart pang with longing. The more she talked, the more she got lost in her memories. She felt like she could get back there, but she was starting to wonder if she even wanted to. After those thoughts, her eyes would refocus on her alien warrior and she felt another sense of loss, but whether it was for him or for her home, she didn’t know.
What scared her most of all, however, was that she was beginning to realize that her life on Earth hadn’t been so great. Yes, she missed her best friend and her city…but beyond that, she didn’t have much else. She had no family that she knew of, her dream job was turning out to be more of a nightmare with each passing day, and she’d often felt stuck, wondering if that was all life would offer her. She’d longed to meet Mr. Right, to settle down and have a family, because maybe then she would find the happiness that eluded her so often.
She didn’t feel lonely when she was with Vaxa, but she’d felt lonely on Earth among her own species, and a part of her was scared to return to that.
But you don’t have to, she thought softly.
During the nights, it was cold. But not as cold as she had first experienced on the planet. And the days were no longer unbearably hot. After she’d mentioned it to Vaxa the afternoon before, he’d told her that it was his blood, changing her, helping her body adapt to his planet. Instead of being wary and creeped out, she marveled that such a small amount of blood could cause so much change. Mostly, she was just happy she wasn’t sweating like a pig anymore whenever the suns were high in the sky.
And during the nights, she could see the Luxirian moon through the small opening at the top of the tent, which she’d assumed was for the fire. Unlike the Earth’s moon, this moon was a soft, shimmering blue, instead of a silvery white. She’d think about the agreement she’d made with Vaxa as she lay in his arms and wonder what the rush was to return to her planet.
The sex was messing with her head. But what great sex it was.
What was messing with her head even more?
The fact that she was falling in love with her alien warrior…and she didn’t know what the hell she was going to do about it.
* * *
Vaxa’an roared in ecstasy, releasing his seed into his mate, feeling the remnants of her orgasm rhythmically pulse around him. He dragged his lips over her skin, biting her neck. The primal part of him loved to see his mark on her.
He continued to lazily thrust between her legs, while they both caught their breath. It had been a hard couple of spans on his female. His human mate had admitted to him the span before that she had not mated in over a rotation. So, naturally, she was completely exhausted, unused to the insatiable sexual appetites of Luxirians.
Perhaps, it was best, he thought, that they would be returning to their home once the suns rose. His duties would separate them for longer periods of the span, giving her time to rest and recover. Even though she hadn’t complained, he knew that her body was sore from the demands of the blood bonding and the last thing in the entire universe he wanted to do was cause her pain.
With a satisfied grunt, he rolled off of her, tucking her against his side. Her skin was damp with perspiration from their activities and he purred, stroking a hand down her back before letting it rest on her rump.
Craning his head to look down at her, his eyes traveled over her soft skin as she sighed contentedly against him.
“What is this?” he murmured quietly, his fingertips tracing over little dark marks that were scattered over her body.
She saw him tracing one on the back of her hand and her lips curled in an expression he found immensely pleasing. “Moles. Freckles. People call them different things. I had these checked out by a doctor and they are harmless.”
He made a sound in the back of his throat. “Sometimes they are dangerous?”
“Sometimes,” she murmured.
Vaxa’an’s face pinched, trying to imagine what harm these tiny dark spots could possible cause. He smoothed his thumb over the adorable hairs above her eyes. “What are these?”
“These?” she asked. “They are called eyebrows.”
“Eyebrows. What is their purpose?”
“I—you know, I don’t really know. Maybe to help protect our eyes from sweat and dirt.”
“And these?” he asked, sliding the pads of his fingertips over her blunt nails. “Do humans not have claws? How do you protect yourself if you are in danger?”
“Well, I have this thing called pepper spray.”
“Pepper spray?” he repeated.
“Yes, it’s a can filled with liquid that you spray into someone’s eyes if they are attacking you. It burns and makes it harder for them to see.”
Vaxa’an frowned. “And then what? What happens to the enemy? Is that all you do to punish them?”
“It depends how serious the attack is, I suppose,” she murmured, her ‘eyebrows’ dropping a bit in a puzzled expression. “What would your people do against an attacker?”
“An attack against a female? They are executed.”
“What?” she whispered.
“A forced mating or physical attack against a female is the worst crime on Luxiria. We do not tolerate those males in our society, so we execute them. It is simple.”
She went silent, processing what he was telling her. He wanted her to feel safe on Luxiria. No male would dare harm her. Luxirians celebrated females. They gave life. Without females, there would be no Luxiria, a truth that had been plaguing their race since the Jetutian attack.
“Where I’m from,” she said, “it’s not as simple as that, though perhaps it should be. Some rapists are never charged, some go to prison and then get let out shortly after.”
Vaxa’an recoiled, surely not hearing her correctly. “They force themselves on females and then get to assimilate back into society?”
“Yes.”
Rage built up in Vaxa’an’s chest. His female would never return to her planet. Not when these ‘rapists’ were roaming free.
“Vaxa?” she asked, running her palm down his chest. “Are you alright?”
“No,” he bit out, wondering how she could be so calm about this. It went against everything a Luxirian stood for and she didn’t even seem affected by it.
“That upsets you a lot?” she asked.
“Tev,” he hissed, body tensing, making her sit up on her elbow to see him better. “Females should not be treated like that.”
Kate went silent. She regarded him, looking like she was on the verge of saying something but holding her tongue.
“What is it?” he asked. He could read his female much more easily now than when he’d first met her. Her human expressions were becoming as familiar to him as Luxirian ones.
“In a weird way, I like that you’re upset about it,” she said quietly, slowly. “I am, because it shows that you respect women.”
Vaxa’an sensed that there was more and he waited patiently, letting her take her time to form her thoughts.
“But,” she started, “what about the place that you took me from?”
“The Pit?” Vaxa’an grunted, his lips drawing into a deep frown.
“The Pit,” she whispered. “There were all those women there. We were all frightened. I woke up naked and chained and I didn’t understand what was happening. And then we were led into that arena…and the girl next to me said that we were to be won as—as sex slaves!”
Vaxa’an’s fist clenched against her hip, discomfort burning in his chest.
“If Luxirians are so against violence against women…why were you there?” Kate asked softly, her green eyes holding his. “I was lucky that you picked me, I realize that now…because you didn’t force me into any sexual situations that I didn’t want. But I can’t help but wonder what happened to the other women. The other aliens most likely aren’t as honorable as Luxirians. You can’t tell me that the thought hasn’t crossed your mind.”
Vaxa’an closed his eyes, his mind clouding with turmoil. Of course, he’d thought about it but he was ashamed to admit that he hadn’t so much as looked at the other females being offered that span. He hadn’t seen the expressions of fear on their faces because the moment that his eyes had connected with his Kat…he’d thought of nothing else except claiming her. And once he had, all he’d wanted was to get her safely home, back to Luxiria.
“I did not act honorably that day,” he admitted to her. “When we journeyed to the Pit, I was there for one purpose only. To find a Breeder.” He’d explained the concept of Breeders to her the previous span, so he knew that she understood what it meant. “My species is slowly dying out. After the attack, we waited, conducting research on our own females to see if anything could be done for them. But the tests were inconclusive and time consuming. Last lunar cycle, I brought the council together and we all agreed that there was only one way forward…to breed with a compatible species. As Prime Leader, I needed to set an example for our people.”
“But why the Pit?” she asked.
“It was the quickest and easiest way. It was not a far distance to travel, and I would have a greater chance of my Instinct choosing a compatible Breeder. I did not know that only human females were being offered.”
“Would you have gone had you known?” she asked, looking down at his chest.
He huffed out a breath, wanting to be honest with his mate. “No.” Kate sucked in a small breath and he ran his fingers down her spine, trying to calm her. “We knew little of humans. We were told they were a…fragile species, so no, we did not think there would be compatibility. But my Instinct proved me wrong. It knew.”
“And now?” she whispered.
“I am forever grateful to the Fates,” he started, voice gruff, “that I did not know there would be only humans. That I found you in that place. I am ashamed that I did not help those females. I wish now that I had. But I do not feel shame that I took you, as selfish as it may be.”
Kate nodded and sank back down onto his chest, her breath fanning lightly over his nipples. He knew that his answers didn’t satisfy her fully. The fellixix conveyed her restlessness.
“Thank you for being honest with me, Vaxa.”
“I am sorry,” he said, running his fingers over her nude body. “I am sorry, Kat.”
She sighed against him, relaxing.
“As selfish as it may be…” she said, repeating his words. Her gaze connected with his and she scooted up to push her face into his neck. He felt her hot, whispered words against his flesh. “I am glad that it was you.”
* * *
Long after his Kat drifted off to sleep after another frenzied, consuming mating, Vaxa’an remained awake. His female’s words about the Pit would not leave his mind and every time he thought about his actions there, his gut clenched in shame.
He could have helped those females. He’d had a ship full of Luxirian warriors. The Krevorags were a spineless, physically weak species. He could have taken out the entirety of them with his men and taken the females to safety.
But he hadn’t.
The knowledge speared him.
And guilt ate at him. Not just over the Pit…but over his lie to his female. Vaxa’an could easily return her to her home planet. His crystal would be more than enough power to journey to the Fourth Quadrant, and yet, he’d kept that information to himself.
His heart thudded in his chest, his Instinct quietly content, as he gazed down at his slumbering mate. Would she leave him if he told her he’d lied? Would she demand the crystal and return back to her planet?
He remembered the way she spoke about her home, about her life there in a place called ‘Shee-cog-go.’ There had been longing in her gaze, an expression that he could hardly stand because of his guilt. He’d taken that from her. He wondered if she would forgive him if she found out.
When she found out. Because Vaxa’an knew that he would have to tell her. The lie wasn’t settling and the longer he left it to fester, the more it poisoned his thoughts. He needed to be honest with his female.
When they returned back to their home, he would tell her. He would give her the crystal and explain. He didn’t want her thinking that she was a prisoner on his planet, bound to him by an agreement they’d made on his vessel. He wanted her to want to be on Luxiria, to want to be with him. They were now bound by something stronger than any agreement. They were bound by blood and the words they’d shared with one another.
Vaxa’an prayed to the Fates that his Kat would stay once he gave her the power to leave.