They tell me the cops came just in time.

When they found us, we were lying on the floor. A pool of blood was spreading below us. Seth was unconscious, and I was inconsolably crying. There was blood on my hands, my face, my clothes.

Seth’s blood.

He’s still in the hospital now, two days after the incident. Still unconscious.

They say the bullet was stronger than Seth’s vest could withstand, so it penetrated the material and burrowed itself into Seth’s flesh.

The guy who shot Seth was one of the four men who had assaulted me in that gray room. Seth and his men thought he was already dead, but he had just enough life in him to take another shot.

It was terrifying when I first woke up in a hospital bed. I wasn’t hurt too badly, but I was confused and traumatized. I’m better now, I think. I can function, at least.

In fact, I’m doing so well they’re letting me out right now. I just have to sign a few papers at the reception desk, and then I’m done. I can put this behind me.

Except, I don’t want to.

I keep thinking about how Seth came to my rescue, shielding me with his own body, taking not just one, but two bullets for me.

How could I have doubted him?

I feel so regretful now. I can’t believe I ran away just like that and got myself caught like a suicidal idiot.

I should’ve trusted him. He’s not perfect, but he wants me safe and happy, and he’d die to make that a reality.

I walk down the hospital hallway, so familiar now from my frequent visits to Seth’s room.

The beige tiled floors, the wooden railings on the beige walls, the beige doors, the lines of plastic chairs for friends and family of the sick people. You get the idea; the place looks like it was designed to make sad and scared people more depressed.

I narrow my eyes as I get closer. There’s someone sitting on one of the chairs along the wall outside Seth’s room. A big man. Raphael.

I stop right in front of him. He looks up.

“Is something wrong? Is he okay?” A painful lump forms in my throat. I wonder if he’s taken a turn for the worse. If he’s doing fine, why isn’t Raphael in there with him?

“He’s fine,” Raphael says with kind eyes. “He’s actually doing really well.”

I heave a relieved sigh. “I thought he’d…” I let my voice trail off, unable to bring myself to say the words. I’ve been so scared because they told us there was still a small chance he might not make it.

“Why don’t you sit down?” Raphael gestures at the chair beside him.

“Actually, I want to see Seth,” I say, starting to walk toward the door.

Raphael takes my hand. “That’s what I want to talk to you about.” He’s different from how he usually is. His gaze is solemn, serious.

I take a seat, my head filled with questions. “What are we doing here, Raphael? Can’t we go inside? He’s really okay, right? You’re not lying to me?”

“No, he’s doing well, I swear. Don’t worry about him,” Raphael says.

My chest fills with dread as Raphael takes a deep breath. What’s bothering him then, if Seth is fine?

“Alejandra has gotten you a place in downtown San Francisco. We’ve paid the rent for a year. You take as much time as you need to start looking for a job, okay? I know you’d probably want to start working again right away, but don’t. Just don’t worry about anything for now,” he says.

“San Francisco? What are you talking about? I don’t need an apartment in the city. Why would I visit the city so much I’d need one?”

“No, you’re not getting this.” Raphael takes another deep breath. “You’re not staying here. You’re going back to the city.”

“What? I’m not… But I… I work for Seth,” I stutter, not understanding what’s happening.

What does he mean, I’m not staying here? I’m going back to work with Seth. I’ve thought all about it. We’re going to be happy. I don’t even care anymore about opening a restaurant. I just want to be with Seth.

“You know he doesn’t really need a chef,” Raphael says. “Ana has been taking care of all the cooking there for years. You were only hired because Seth got so obsessed with you, Walter’s men got a whiff of it. They found his weakness. He knew you were in danger. He felt responsible. That’s why he hired you.”

“Well, yeah, I know that. But Seth wants me to cook for him. Just ask him. I mean, Ana’s cooking is great, but she doesn’t know what Seth likes. Not really.” I get up from my chair. I need to talk to Seth because I can tell, from the way Raphael is looking at me, that he doesn’t get it.

Again, he grabs my hand. He looks up at me and gives me a sad smile. “Alice, I’m sorry. But Seth doesn’t want to see you. That’s why he told me to sit here and wait for you.”

My blood runs cold. That can’t be true.

“That’s not true,” I say.

“It’s true, Alice. I’m sorry. Seth wants you to go back to the city and rebuild your life. Forget everything that has happened here.”

“No, you’re wrong. He wants me close so he can protect me. That’s what he’s always told me.”

“It’s safe now, Alice. Because you got kidnapped, the cops finally had to go there and see what was really happening. They shut down the whole illegal operation and freed the people Walter was forcing to work for him.” Raphael stares right at me, trying to convince me he’s speaking sense, but everything he says sounds like a bad joke.

I start to laugh. Of course this is a joke.

Raphael looks at me with concern in his eyes.

“Good one, Raphael. Very funny. Can I go in and see him now?” I ask.

“I’m serious, Alice,” he says quietly, his face sincere and apologetic.

Tears well in my eyes, and everything blurs together into a beige haze.

“Please, Raphael, I need to at least talk to Seth. He needs to understand how sorry I am. I swear I won’t run away again, so if he’ll just take me back…” My voice trails off, my words cut off by the lump in my throat.

“You don’t understand, Alice. This is good. Everything is good now. The traffickers are arrested, innocent people are freed, the bad guys can’t hurt you again. You get your life back. Those are all good things, right?” Raphael coaxes me in a voice sweet as honey, but I don’t care about anything he has said.

How can anything be good if Seth doesn’t want to see me again? He must hate me.

“Tell him I’m sorry. Please…” I beg. God, this is humiliating, but I don’t care anymore. I just need to see Seth.

“He’s not angry at you, Alice. The opposite, in fact. He thinks you should be the one who’s angry at him, for involving you in something so dangerous. He just wants you to stay away for your own safety. You’ve suffered enough. It’s time for you to live your life now.”

“But, Raphael, my life is here now. You don’t understand.”

“Then make a new life for yourself,” he says softly. “You’ll be happier living your own life.”

He keeps talking in that sickeningly sweet voice, like he’s telling a kid that ice cream is bad and banned forever.

I hate it. And I hate him.

I don’t remember everything he says after that.

It’s clear that he’s not going to let me enter Seth’s room. He tells me Seth has insisted on keeping me outside, although I can’t see how that could be true. Which means he’s a liar.

Still, it’s not like I can just push him away if he decides to block the door with his body. He’s so much bigger and stronger than I am.

So, with limp legs and a broken heart, I walk away.