I stare at my own reflection in the mirror. So that’s what a married woman looks like. I’m exactly the same as I always have been.

I take a few deep breaths, trying to calm myself down.

Today has gone by like a whirlwind.

Zeke’s driver picked me up in the morning with my luggage, then the chirpy wedding planner’s assistant fussed over me for hours. There was that kiss. And then the rest of the day was a blur of introductions and polite smiles.

I got married today, for the first time ever. (Let’s face it, seeing as we’re going to get divorced a year from now, there’s probably a second husband in my future. Or even a third, if I’m that unlucky.)

Sure, it was a nice ceremony, the setting couldn’t be more beautiful, and everything was perfect.

But none of it makes much of an impression on me—not the music, not the food, and not even the high-profile guests. And I know why.

I know exactly why.

It’s because of that kiss. That damn kiss has filled my mind and expanded to push out everything else.

It’s just like the way Zeke stole my heart, all those years ago, and left no space for anyone else.

Even after all these years, no man has ever made me feel the way Zeke does.

I’m not proud of it, but I’ve kissed a lot of men, in my numerous attempts to forget him. I kept on hoping that this next kiss would be the one that was going to finally erase Zeke from my memory.

But it has never happened. At best, I’ve managed to function like a normal human being, and not like a broken thing with a lot of missing parts.

And now, with just one kiss, Zeke has reclaimed my mind. It won’t be long until he reclaims my body, too. I just hope I’ll come out of this with my soul intact.

At least I don’t have any sexual trauma to deal with. That would’ve made things a lot more complicated.

Considering how long I was held in captivity by my parents’ enemy, I’m lucky to have gotten away without having been assaulted.

To everyone else, Walter—my captor—presented me as his girlfriend. But that was more about appearances than anything. All I did was accompany him places and make him look good, like he had destroyed my dad so completely that even his precious daughter had joined the other side.

According to the girls in the compound, Walter was impotent. He didn’t want me to find out, so he’d never tried to take me to his bed.

Like I said, I’m a lucky girl.

I check my reflection once more. I drag as much air into my lungs as I can, and walk toward the door of this en-suite bathroom. The white marble tiles feel cold and hard under my feet. So does the door handle.

A chill runs through my whole body. I can’t tell if it’s because of the cold or because I’m terrified of what’s waiting for me behind this door—who’s waiting for me.

I pull the door open and find the room already dark and quiet. A figure on the bed stirs—I can hear the sheets rustling.

“Hey, Mrs. Harris,” Zeke greets me playfully. He has been calling me that all day.

Back when I was younger, years and years ago, I would’ve been happy to hear it. But now… Now I’m conflicted.

Back then, there was only love for him. But now, there are so many different emotions I can’t even hope to name them all. Anger, disappointment, sadness—they’re all there.

And yes, that love is still there, too, although it’s often buried by all the other shit. That love is so terrifying I’ve been trying to cover it up, but it’s still there.

“Stop calling me that,” I say curtly.

“Okay… wifey.” Zeke grins as he flips the blanket open and pats the space on the bed next to him. In that low, seductive tone that I haven’t heard in a long time, he says, “It’s our wedding night. Come join me.”

Electric currents rip through my body, sending goosebumps all over my skin and waking up all my senses. My body longs for him.

Even after all this time, being alone with him in the dark evokes so many memories.

If we had The Godfather playing on the TV hanging on the wall of this hotel room, this would an almost-accurate replay of the night he took my virginity.

Lust. Trepidation. Yearning. Fear.

I approach the bed and sit my ass down on the mattress, fully aware that Zeke is staring at me, watching my every reaction.

I’m also fully aware of the fact that he’s not wearing any top. The blanket only covers the bottom half of him, and I can see the solid lines of his muscular body, as well as the tattoos all over his arms. I wonder if he’s naked underneath the blanket, too.

“Talk to me,” Zeke says. “What did you think of the wedding?”

“It was nice,” I say as I lie down on the bed. I pull the blanket over my body, all the way up to my shoulders.

I want him. It’s really hard not to just slide a few feet closer and climb into his arms, especially when I’ve spent many nights dreaming about him.

But he scares me. He’s more dangerous than any man I know, because he touches me where others can’t reach: my heart.

I’m wearing a loose T-shirt and a pair of old sweatpants, in an attempt to appear as unsexy as possible. But I can already tell that a bad outfit won’t stop Zeke—not when his eyes light up with primal lust like they do now.

“‘Nice’?” Zeke repeats. “That’s all?”

“Yeah.” I turn on my side to face Zeke, but at the same time I scoot backward to get as far away from him as possible. I don’t stop until I feel the edge of the mattress on my butt.

“I thought you’d be more impressed,” Zeke says. “I tried to get everything that you want. The beach, the flowers, the cake… Every detail that I can remember. Did I miss anything?”

“No, Zeke. Just… Things change, okay?” I lie.

Yes, I still want all those things, just like I still want him. But I don’t feel the same about them anymore—about the wedding, or about him.

“Oh, that’s a shame. I thought the wedding planner did a great job,” he says as he moves a little closer to me on the bed.

“She did, especially considering she had so little time to plan it,” I say as the mattress dips deeper from Zeke’s weight. My heart beats faster and faster. I say, “Why don’t you give me her business card? I might want to hire her for my second wedding.”

“Wow, you’re already planning your second wedding?” Zeke chuckles—not exactly the reaction I was hoping for. “But I’m not even done with you yet. We have a baby to make, remember?”

“It’s been such a long day, Zeke. Can we just go to sleep tonight?” I’m panicking. I can feel my heart jumping in my rib cage. Jesus, it’s so damn loud. Can Zeke hear it too?

“You don’t have to do anything,” he says with a hungry glint in his eyes. “Just relax and enjoy it. I’m going to make you forget all about how tired you are.”

“Zeke, I’m serious. I’m beat. I should really—”

Before I can finish my sentence, Zeke puts his hand on the back of my head and shuts me up with a kiss.

God, it feels even better than the one we had this afternoon—the wedding kiss. Now it’s just the two of us in the dark, just like it was when I was completely in love with him.

My heart can’t help but go back to that place, and soon I stop avoiding him, avoiding this kiss. I forget why I even try.

So I give in. I let myself drown in this kiss. I let myself forget all the ugly things that have happened between us, and focus on the now.

I’ve agreed to have a baby with Zeke, and we’ve even gotten married. I’m halfway there already. There’s no going back now, so why not go all in? Be his wife, even if it’s only for one year.

I kiss Zeke back with all the passion that I’ve been saving up just for him. My breath grows ragged, and my sighs grow heavy. I need him more than I need air. I cling onto his strong, muscular arms, afraid the currents of time are going to tear us apart again.

I want him. I want this. Even if it’s only temporary. I’ll take however much time I can with Zeke. Maybe we’re not meant to be forever, but is there really anything that lasts forever?

Relationships fall apart, people change, and even when they stay the same, they die after a short time on earth. Nothing is ever guaranteed, and that makes everything more valuable, more beautiful.

I cherish this. This moment. This man.

Zeke lays me down flat on my back and gets on top of me. I miss his skin, his scent, the weight of his body. He’s so familiar, and yet so foreign at the same time.

He puts his knees between my legs, pushing them apart, and I realize he’s wearing pants after all. But my disappointment evaporates when he presses his hard-on against me. My eyes snap open to look at him. He’s wearing a smirk, knowing exactly what he’s doing to me.

He yanks off my shirt, not surprised that I’m not wearing a bra underneath. He knows I never do when I sleep.

We have spent a few precious nights together—and now we’ll get to spend a few hundred more. That has to be a good thing.

As Zeke trails kisses all over my neck and down to my breasts, I know something that feels this good can’t be a bad thing.

My lips part and a moan escapes. I’ve never been very vocal in bed, except when I’m with Zeke.

I thought that version of me had gone away with time, but now I know it has been inside me all along, lying dormant, waiting for Zeke to come back into my life. And now he is.

I put my hand on his head and grab his thick hair, as if to convince myself he’s really here. Zeke moves down my body, his lips tickling my belly as his hands pull my pants down. I lift my hips off the bed to help. I no longer hide my desire for him—I can’t.

When he kisses the insides of my thighs, I realize what he’s about to do.

Just relax and enjoy it, he said.

That must’ve been only minutes ago, but it feels a lot longer than that. Because everything has changed so quickly between us—again. Just like it did that first night, when he turned to me and called me like I wasn’t just a friend, but a girl.

And now he’s treating me like a woman. I shudder as he plants light, butterfly kisses up my thighs, even as his hands grab my ass roughly. Wetness spills out of me, staining the sheets and making it clear just how much I want Zeke.

Gone are the tentative touches, and the gentle carefulness. He knows I want this just as much as he does, and he knows I can take it. I’m a big girl now.

I’m definitely showing him what I want like a big girl. I can’t stop myself, even if I try. My hips move involuntarily, lifting up and begging him to take me.

“You’re wet. You’re getting wet for me,” he says with a low growl, his stubble grazing against my skin.

“Yeah,” I moan. I whimper with need. I need him to unleash that hungry animal within him.

“I miss the taste of you,” he says as his lips get closer to my pussy. He sounds like he’s about to eat me alive, and by god, I want him to.

When his lips finally make contact with my wet folds, I start to shiver, already losing control of my body. Zeke seems as impatient as I am, wasting no time to lap up my juices and suck my petals into his wet, warm mouth.

He greedily parts my thighs further so he can take in more of me. I can only throw my head back as my body writhes and shakes for him.

He told me to relax? There's no way I can do that, especially now that he has found my clit. All the muscles in my body are tensing, as if coiling in preparation for something to snap them into motion. I grab the bed sheets. My back arches, while my arousal keeps building up…

And then, nothing.

Literally, nothing.

There's no tongue on my pussy—no lips kissing me either. The strong hands parting my thighs are gone, too.

I straighten my spine and look down, only to find Zeke still kneeling between my thighs, holding a phone to his ear.

Is he…

Is he actually on the phone right now?

Did he really stop eating me out to pick up a phone call?

This has to be a joke, right?

“You really can't find them? Have you checked your purse?” Zeke asks into the phone.

Okay, he's really choosing to pick up a phone call, even while I’m naked and about to come. And from the mention of a purse, it’s likely he’s talking to another woman. This has to be a new low in my sexual history.

“Hold tight, I’m coming,” he says.

I glare at Zeke in the darkness. Did I really hear that right? Is he seriously about to leave me here, naked and alone? Jesus, I was about to say ‘I’m coming’ mere seconds ago

“Ali, I’ll be right back, okay?” Zeke whispers as he gets up from the bed, already putting on his clothes and making his way toward the door. He's not even waiting for a response from me, nor is he giving me any explanation.

“Yeah, okay.” I pull up the blanket over my naked body, cold and ashamed now, where it was hot and lustful before.

As Zeke walks out the door, a slice of warm light spills into the room from the hotel hallway. The door closes, and the room goes back to almost complete darkness.

Even with the plush carpeting muffling Zeke’s footsteps, I can hear him walking away at a brisk pace, going further and further away from me.

Is it another woman?

Is it an urgent business matter?

It can't be family—an orphan who grew up in the foster system, Zeke has always been a lone wolf. Even though he gets along well with everyone he meets, he doesn't let people get close.

But…

But does it matter who—or what—it is?

Even back then, all those years ago, when I wanted him to be mine, I knew Zeke wouldn't treat me like a priority. He always had a thousand more important things to do, and I was just an afterthought.

I should've known better than expect anything different from him. People don't change. And even if they do, it's rarely for the better.