Wandfasting
“I received some correspondence this morning,” my aunt informs me as we sit in her breakfast alcove.
We’re surrounded on three sides by arching windows that overlook well-maintained gardens. A nearby display of blood-red roses pierces the gloomy, overcast day.
I can barely make out the sound of silverware on the gilded porcelain as my aunt neatly cuts into the omelete and spiced fruit before her. Her half-eaten scone sits pristinely on an adjacent plate. Everything she does—calligraphy, eating, dressing—is always so tidy. It’s easy to feel disheveled and bumbling next to her constant perfection. I glance down at my own half-eaten scone, a circle of fine crumbs orbiting the plate.
“Correspondence from whom?” I wonder as I try to clean up my stray crumbs with the tip of my finger.
“Lukas Grey’s parents.”
My finger freezes. I look up, my aunt taking her time with this news as she tranquilly sips at her tea.
“Are you friends with them, then?” I ask, trying to keep my voice neutral.
My aunt shoots me a bemused smile. “Of course, dear. I’ve known Lachlan and Evelyn for years.”
I take a small bite from my scone, attempting to appear nonchalant.
“Apparently,” she continues, as she cradles her teacup, “Lukas indicated to them last night that he would agree to fast to you.”
I choke on the scone. “What?”
My aunt flashes a large, white smile at me, like a cat that has just eaten a canary. “It seems you made quite an impression.”
“He wants to wandfast to me?” I sputter, crumbs flying from my mouth.
She eyes me quizzically. “Why are you so surprised? You’re of age, Elloren. Most Gardnerian girls your age are already fasted, or are soon about to be...”
“But I’ve only just met him!”
“That’s of no consequence,” she says, waving her hand dismissively.
I stare at her, stunned. Of no consequence. Seriously?
“We should arrange for the two of you to be fasted as soon as possible,” Aunt Vyvian states decidedly. “Enith...”
My aunt turns to the blue-skinned Urisk girl who helped me with my music last night. She stands against the wall, silent and expressionless, like a statue.
“Yes, ma’am?” Enith responds.
“Send word to the Greys,” my aunt instructs. “Let them know that Elloren is very pleased to accept Lukas’s proposal and that we would like to arrange for the fasting to take place as soon as possible. Perhaps after tomorrow’s church service.”
“Wait...” I plead, interrupting her. “I can’t fast to Lukas.”
Aunt Vyvian holds her scone in suspended animation. “What do you mean, you can’t?”
Enith is glowering at me, wide-eyed and appalled, like I’ve just thrown a jar of preserves at both of them.
“I’ve known him exactly one day.” Sweet Ancient One, what could Lukas be thinking?
“Elloren,” my aunt breathes, setting her scone down, “this type of proposal, from a family such as this, from a young man such as Lukas Grey, does not come along every day.”
“I’m sorry.” I shake my head. “I can’t. I’ve only just met him. And...and I promised Uncle Edwin...”
“Promised him what?”
“That I’ll wait until I’m done with my education to fast to someone.”
My aunt’s mouth falls open. “But that’s at least two years from now!”
“I know.”
“Elloren,” she says, her voice low, “you’d be a fool to turn down this proposal.”
My resolve stiffens. “Perhaps if he likes me that much, he can court me first.”
Her eyes take on a hard glint. “Perhaps I should send word to the Greys that they should reconsider their initial plan.”
“What plan?”
“Why, to have Lukas fasted to Fallon Bane, my dear.”
I freeze, completely thrown. “But,” I counter, “Lukas told me he’s not going to fast to Fallon.”
My aunt makes a sound of derision. “Really, Elloren. Do you honestly think he’ll wait for you forever?” Her gaze turns calculating. “I’m sure Fallon Bane would be happy to take your place.”
An unbidden image of Lukas kissing smug, perfect Fallon forms in my mind, his back to me as he clings to her passionately, her eyes open, glaring at me with malicious triumph. She wouldn’t hesitate to accept a wandfasting proposal from Lukas Grey.
But to fast to him after knowing him for only one day—that would be madness.
And Rafe has concerns. Enough to warn me off Lukas.
“Do you want to be alone all your life, Elloren?” my aunt coos, leaning forward. “Don’t you want to be fasted someday? To have a family? Do you know how unlikely that will be if you go unfasted for much longer?” She sits back. “Of course there will be a few choices left after you finish University. The young men that no one else wants. But is that what you really want?”
Her words get under my skin, and I momentarily wonder if I’m making a huge mistake.
A chill starts from deep within me, and it has nothing to do with the damp outside. I suddenly very much want my uncle.
“I... I just can’t,” I say weakly.
She narrows her eyes at me. “What, pray tell, am I to tell Lukas’s parents?”
“Tell them,” I begin, my throat becoming constricted, “that I am very thankful for their proposal and I will consider it, but I need time to get to know Lukas a little better.”
“It seems like you were getting to know him pretty well last night, my dear,” she snipes as she takes a sip of her tea.
My face goes hot.
“Don’t you think my servants tell me everything?” She purses her lips at me. “If you’re going to indulge in that type of behavior, Elloren, you need to fast to the young man, and quickly.”
I’m completely mortified.
“If you assume I’m going to sit idly by and watch while you go off to University unfasted and potentially disgrace your entire extended family by falling in with the wrong man, like Sage Gaffney did, you certainly don’t know me very well.” She sets down her tea and leans forward. “You forget, Elloren, that not only will I refuse to pay your University tithe while you are unfasted, I know and am on very close terms with the University’s High Chancellor, in addition to most of the Gardnerian professors and the Lodging Mistress. If I need to, I can make things very unpleasant for you there.” She collects herself and lets out a frustrated sigh. “I’m only doing this for your own good, Elloren. And for the good of our family. You do realize you can avoid all sorts of unpleasantness if you simply agree to fast to Lukas Grey.”
It hurts that she would threaten me—like a sharp slap. “I’m not saying I won’t consider it,” I counter, thrown. “I just can’t fast to him so quickly. I’d like to get to know him a little first.”
If Uncle Edwin was here, he’d take my side.
“Honestly, Elloren,” she says coldly, “you are making this very difficult for me.”
My anger flares. “Then maybe it’s lucky for you that you’re not my official guardian.”
Silence. The Urisk girl freezes, her eyes gone wide with shock.
Aunt Vyvian’s gaze narrows. “My brother doesn’t always have the firmest grasp on reality, my dear. I would never have allowed him to take you in if I had known...” She breaks off, her eyes angrily brimming with some unspoken thought.
“Known what?” I press, stung by her easy dismissal of my uncle.
She leans forward, teeth bared. “That you would grow up to turn down a fasting proposal that every girl in Gardneria would give her eyeteeth for!”
Her expression turns venomous and I shrink back, shocked by the frightening change in her demeanor.
My aunt quickly collects herself, regaining her careful sheen of control, like thick curtains being drawn around her true feelings.
“I shall simply have to find a way to help you change your mind,” she states, her voice once again tranquil. She lightly taps her teacup.
The Urisk girl springs forward to fill it, as if her life depends on it.
My aunt takes her time, mixing some cream into her tea. “I have found that everyone can be persuaded to do the right thing if the right kind of pressure is applied.”
I stare at her with a new wariness, watching as she lifts the porcelain cup with long, graceful fingers.
“Everyone has a breaking point, Elloren. Everyone.” She regards me levelly. “Don’t force me to find yours.”