I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

“You’re going to have to get out of the car,” Tobias said through the window. I didn’t disagree, but I first needed to let go of the steering wheel.

Yes, I’d met his sister Jenny, and I talked to her and their mother at least once a week. I knew when everyone’s birthdays were, even though I wouldn’t be able to tell you my own parents’ and siblings’ birthdays. But I had no idea what the men in Tobias’ family thought of me. I was already so attached to this family even before we started doing whatever it was we were doing…

“What are we doing?” I asked Tobias.

“I’m freezing my ass off while you’re doing an impression of an ice statue,” he snapped back.

“No, seriously. What are we?” Alpha-omega couples didn’t generally do the ‘boyfriend’ thing — they were either mated or just fucking around. We were tentative for the former, and too intimate for the latter. Courting, maybe? We were too secretive for that to fit, but the term made me feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Tobias sighed and climbed back into the car. “We talked about this. When they ask, we’ll tell them we’re just friends.”

“You really think they’ll believe that?” They weren’t stupid. Tobias slept over my place three nights in a row, and my scent was all over him.

Although we spent most of yesterday apart, we made dough last night and spent all day today in a cookie-baking-and-decorating frenzy — my tiny kitchen hadn’t seen so much use in the entire three years I’d lived there. I hadn’t even known Tobias could use an oven, but apparently he was a ‘kitchen chemist’ and could make some pretty delectable treats. The batter was even tastier when licked off various parts of his anatomy.

“No, they won’t believe the ‘just friends’ line. But we don’t have to satisfy their curiosity, either. Now, come on!” He pried my hands from the steering wheel and dragged me out of the car through the passenger side door. Tobias filled his arms with cookie tins and I took the gifts. Most were items Tobias chose to wrap at my place but I’d also gotten small things for his family, even though his mother had expressly told me to absolutely not buy them anything.

Just before we reached the door, Tobias snatched the bags of gifts from me as a woman shouted, “Heads up!”

I looked up to find a huge black kitten drop on me from a second floor window. My heart stopped beating as I imagined all the worst possible outcomes, but I caught her easily. She purred and nuzzled my cheek, then draped herself over my shoulder.

“Good catch!” Tobias’ sister shouted. I must have given her a look of shock and horror that she’d tossed her baby out the window, because she said, “Oh, please. Betsy got tired of waiting, and she spends half her free time climbing up trees and launching herself out of them. Now get your butt in here, guys!”

Tobias snickered and handed me back one of the bags, while his sister buzzed us into the building. I carried Betsy inside, stroking her back while her tail rhythmically thwacked me in the face. When Tobias was a child —if he’d been a panther, of course— I imagined he smelled like the adorable bundle in my arms.

The door to apartment 2A was already open and the smells of cookies, candles, and Tobias wafted out along with the sound of children’s Christmas songs. Two women stood in the doorway, watching us with fond amusement. I’d seen enough family pictures to recognize them as Jenny, Tobias’ sister, and their mother Candice.

Betsy took advantage of my inattention to stretch toward her uncle and sniff the tins in his hands. Tobias rubbed the fur between her ears. “Yes, kiddo. We baked cookies! But you know you have to–”

The kitten twisted out of my grasp and raced into the apartment, shifting as soon as her paw cleared the door jamb. Her grandmother dropped a pretty, poofy dress on her head and within a split second she was fully dressed. I had to chuckle — shifter kids were all either staunch nudists or speed-dressers, or both. Their free time was full of enjoying their growing bodies, discovering all the things each form could do, and deciding which was best for what purpose.

“If she didn’t have to shift to taste sweets, she’d be catting all over the apartment 24/7,” Jenny confided as she batted my hand out of the way and gave me a big hug. “You’re finally here!”

“We’re barely five minutes late,” I pointed out. Tobias had said the timing was flexible, and dinner wasn’t for an hour. Did they have pre-dinner rituals I didn’t know about?

“More like three years late.” Candice pried me out of Jenny’s arms and enveloped me in a hug of her own. I tried not to read too much into her statement. They had treated me as a friend of the family ever since proving I could retain my sense of humor after twenty-four hours of working for Tobias.

“Oh sure, no hugs for me!” Tobias griped. She released me to kiss his cheek and relieve him of a couple of cookie tins.

Two men shook my hand and clapped me on the back, introducing themselves as Abe, Tobias and Jenny’s father, and Felix, Jenny’s panther husband. Within minutes, I found myself in the living room with a mug of mulled wine in my hand and little Betsy in my lap, as she pelted me with questions in between bites of reindeer-shaped sugar cookies.

“I eat the head first so they don’t feel the rest. Quick and clean,” she explained solemnly, taking a ferocious bite of cookie. As soon as she swallowed, she grinned, “Now tell me about your horses! Where are they? Did you bring them with you? Can I ride one?”

“I may have told her you’re a cowboy,” Tobias whispered, squeezing my shoulder before joining his mother and sister in the kitchen. Betsy waited with bated breath, as if I was about to produce a horse any minute.

“My horses are in Montana. That’s on the other side of the country. It’s so far away, you need to take a plane to get there,” I explained but she just shook her head.

“Do you have to go over an ocean?”

“No.”

“Then I can run there. I’m really fast!” Betsy leapt out of my lap and shifted, her dress falling into a graceful puddle. Her grandfather nearly tripped over her as she did laps around the apartment, proving her speed.

“Is she trying to run to Disneyland again?” Abe asked, and sat down beside me. Felix sat on my other side and I realized that we were about to have a serious talk. “So tell me about your relationship with my son.”

“We’re friends,” I said unconvincingly. Both men rolled their eyes and I tried to make them understand the position we were in, if we were to be more than friends one day.

“Are you ashamed of him? Waiting for someone better, someone more pliable to come along?” his father asked

I was horrified and lost all pretense of platonicity. “Someone better?!”

“He’s not going to change. Tobias is not going to become some perfect little omega behind closed doors,” Felix added calmly, only stoking the flames of my anger. “He needs an alpha who can support the man he is.”

“I don’t expect him to change. I don’t want him to change. He’s Tobias!” I didn’t even have words to express how wrong they were to even think someone could want Tobias to be less Tobiassy. Yes, he was a pain in the ass sometimes, but I’d known that for years. I watched Betsy tear through the room, bouncing off various surfaces, and tried to calm down. This was a lovely apartment — decorated in neutral colors and spacious enough to accommodate a 6-foot tree, and I bet my entire place could fit in the living room and kitchen. Before I could think better of it, I told Abe and Felix, “I’ll always make less than he does, you know.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. Does that bother you?” Abe asked.

“No, not really.” One day, I’d have a full-time programming job of my own, with an alpha-grade salary. And I knew Tobias had trouble going through a full day without embarking on some coding project. That didn’t matter — I’d never had a problem with our power dynamic. “But he is an omega, and kids…”

His father and brother-in-law nodded, understanding. Omega pregnancies were harder and more dangerous than beta women’s. They were more like wolf pregnancies — shorter duration, with multiple pups, pushing their otherwise-male bodies to the limit. One of the hardest parts of discovering I was an alpha was coming to terms with the fact that my mate would go through all that. At least Tobias had access to shifter doctors and hospitals here, rather than the shifter midwife and homemade medicinals that were available back at my family’s very secluded ranch.

“Don’t put the cart before the horse, cowboy,” Abe said and, finished with his interrogation, got up to filch some food from the kitchen.

Meanwhile, Felix watched me steadily. I wondered what was going through his feline mind, but he said nothing more and I didn’t ask. He did, however, reach out and catch his daughter as she hurtled past, and then tossed her at me. Betsy was asleep and purring practically before she landed in my lap.

The human half of dinner was delectable and entertaining as hell. We feasted on lasagna, ham, roast beef, and a ridiculous number of sides all while the family told embarrassing stories about Tobias. They challenged me to figure out which stories were from his childhood and which happened in the past couple of years — I was correct less than half the time.

Around seven o’clock, we adjourned and drove to Felix & Jenny’s home for our ‘Midnight’ Run. Their crumpled colonial was a heart-breaking sight, but it would be fixed and was in a spectacular location, with a couple of acres of woods and abutting a small nature preserve. I started to get ready to shift when Felix started snickering, and I realized I was the only one getting undressed.

“First we all make a Christmas wish!” Betsy explained excitedly.

“Okay. What are we wishing for?” I asked.

“Whatever you want most in the whole wide world! But you can’t tell anyone or else it won’t come true,” she said solemnly, as if everything good in the world hinged upon tonight’s wish. “Unless you’re Uncle Tobias, because he doesn’t know how to wish.”

“I know how to wish, I just make one that I can actually make happen,” he muttered.

“That’s called a New Year’s resolution,” I explained. Because of course he would be practical about a wish. So I tattled to Betsy, “I don’t think he made a wish over his birthday cake, either.”

“He never does.” She shook her head as though I’d said he had a terminal illness. Then a smile bloomed on her face. “His birthday cake, hmm? This year?”

“Well, there was one alpha Malcolm didn’t interrogate…” Candice pointed out, laughing.

Oh crap — the date! I cleared my throat. “Betsy, I think our mission is clear. Uncle Puppy has to make a real wish tonight! How about you explain it to him?”

She cheered and clapped her hands and leapt into her uncle’s arms. “You have to close your eyes and think about nothing.”

Tobias sighed but nodded.

“NOTHING!” she screamed like a drill sergeant.

“Okay, okay. Nothing. And then what?”

“The thing that will make you happiest in the whole wide world will pop into your head. POP! And there you go!” She wriggled out of his arms, mission accomplished, and we all stood in a circle holding hands. Betsy shouted one more time that Tobias had to shut his eyes, then we all closed our eyes, opened our minds, and wished.

Only one thing filled my mind: Tobias’ hand in mine.

When we opened our eyes, he looked a little pale and very uncomfortable. “Tobias, you okay?”

“Yeah, umm… wishing is just hard work, I guess.”

“What did you–”

“NO TELLING!” Betsy shouted. “It’s time to run now!”

In true shifter-kid fashion, she was undressed and shifted in the blink of an eye. I turned to disrobe out of an unusual need to preserve their modesty, but watched Tobias out of the corner of my eye before shifting myself. I’d seen videos of him playing with Betsy, but that was nothing like seeing him in person. Tobias was a gorgeous, sleek grey wolf with high-contrast markings. As soon as I shifted, he was by my side and we rubbed against each other. I marked him as thoroughly as I could, and was pleased to see he did the same. Then his father chuffed good-naturedly and I remembered where we were.

Felix’s panther was as huge as the man, and more than a little intimidating. But he played and ran in the snow with the rest of us before finding a sturdy tree limb to drape himself upon and oversee our merriment. Tobias and I wrestled and played chase. We teased Jenny, and acted surprised whenever little Betsy dropped on us from above. Abe found the trail of a fox and we all tried to track it, but the snow made it nearly impossible.

We played for hours, until Betsy climbed her father’s tree and fell asleep. Once we returned to the cars, we tore into raw steaks and ground beef —the shifter half of Christmas dinner— before shifting, dressing, and making our way back to the apartment for dessert. It was a decadent way to replenish all the energy we’d expended.

When Betsy began to yawn and loudly proclaim that she wasn’t tired at all, I moved the couch and helped Tobias set up the new air mattress. Then I kissed him on the forehead and grabbed my coat and keys.

“Where are you going? Did you forget something in the car?” Candice asked. “Abe, go help him get his things!”

“I– I’m going home now. It’s getting late and I bet you’ll have an early morning.” I gave Jenny and Betsy hugs and shook Felix’s limp hand. “Thank you so much for sharing Christmas Eve with–”

Candice pushed me away and shoved something into my hands. “You are putting on your penguin pajamas and waiting for Santa Paws like everybody else, Young Man!”

“Umm–”

“Nooooo! You can’t leave!” Betsy shouted, her lower lip trembling.

“No, sweetie, don’t worry. Uncle Mal’s not leaving.” Felix rubbed his daughter’s back and Jenny shot me a triumphant look. I couldn’t make a child cry on Christmas!

I took off my coat and everyone cheered. “Thank y–”

“Nope! No more thank yous. Don’t want to hear it,” Candice insisted, then everyone left to get ready for bed.

I looked at the flannel pajamas in my hand, counted the beds in the house, and realized my platonic options were limited. So I stripped, shifted, and lay down on the couch.

“What are you doing?” Betsy asked, drawing everyone’s attention. Let’s see what the weird new guy is doing now!

I couldn’t answer without shifting back, so I just curled to show I was going to sleep.

“Just put on the penguin pajamas. Everyone has to wear them; there’s no way around it. Trust me, I’ve tried,” Felix counseled. But I was not wearing penguin pajamas in wolf form! So I chuffed at him and stretched back out, laying my head on the folded pajamas.

Eventually, Tobias joined us, a toothbrush still in his mouth. “No, Malcolm. Get up. You’re too big. You take the mattress and I’ll take the couch.”

I chuffed at him in annoyance that he’d even suggest that. I was perfectly comfortable and he was —however unofficially— my omega. We began a hardcore staring contest until the entire family burst out laughing. At me. Or us. But mostly, it felt like they were laughing at me.

“Son, I think that bed is big enough for two friends. No need to sleep on the floor,” Abe told me, drying the tears from his eyes. To be fair, we were in the middle of the one common area. Even if we were mated, nothing would be going on out here. “Now put on your penguins before Candice gets angry.”

We said goodnight and Jenny and Felix locked Betsy in their room so she couldn’t sleep under the tree. Then Tobias and I donned our coats and boots and snuck outside to Felix’s car, to retrieve all the gifts Santa Paws had brought the family. We silently filled stockings —including one with my name on it!— and arranged larger gifts artfully under the tree. Then I gave in to peer pressure, donned my penguin pajamas, and ‘reluctantly’ spooned my omega under the multicolor lights.

“Thank you,” I whispered into Tobias’ hair. “This was… magical.”

“It’s Christmas. It’s supposed to be magical.” He turned around to face me, and I kissed him tenderly.

I’d never experienced a Christmas like this. Or, at least, not since I was Betsy’s age. My family wasn’t brutal or uncaring, but they had a frontier-like mindset that had never quite modernized. Our Christmas run was competitive, always trying to prove how much we’d grown over the past year, and our post-run meal was whatever we managed to catch. There were still carols and gifts, pies and merriment, and even the myth of Santa Paws for the youngest pups in the extended family. My brothers were alphas and my sister was a hard-as-nails bitch nobody would dream of messing with, and our life suited them. But I was the bookish beta who wasn’t a beta, and this was the kind of holiday I’d thought only existed on a Hollywood set.

Honestly, I’d always dreamed that I would one day find the right omega. We’d start a family and traditions of our own, and maybe I’d be lucky enough to have holidays like this. If I hadn’t already fallen hard and fast for Tobias, his family would have definitely clinched the deal.

“When you grow up and have kids, is this what your Christmas will look like?” I whispered, overwhelmed at the realization that I really had fallen in love with Tobias. All it took was three years, a blind date, and a single sniff.

“My Christmas will have more cookies and less flashing lights,” he murmured and wrapped his arm around me. “Now go to sleep, or else Santa Paws will cough a hairball into your stocking.”

Ugh! What a horrifying thought! “Santa Paws isn’t a cat!”

“So says a man who’s never gotten a hairball in his stocking.”

I rolled onto my back and, with my sweet omega snuggled against my side, I let my mind wander until his chainsaw-like snoring lulled me to sleep.

Tobias had not been exaggerating about Betsy’s Good Morning Pounce. Just as the sun was beginning to rise, Tobias’ niece was ready to attack her stocking, which meant it was time for everyone to wake up. Apparently, as the new guy, I got the honor of First Pounce. Betsy launched herself through the air, from lord only knew where, to land on my face. Tobias got away with a cheek-licking as she draped herself across my throat.

Unfortunately for her, I like to breathe, so I detached each of her claws from the bedding —no wonder their last air mattress had sprung a leak— to settle her between us. But she was awake! Very, very awake! And we had to be, too!

We got up, deflated the bed, and set to work on breakfast. Betsy sat on a stool, making up an impromptu Christmas song as we cooked. What she lacked in singing skill, she made up for with enthusiasm. Tobias and I made cinnamon rolls together and put them into the oven, then while Tobias whipped up some red velvet pancakes, I found green dye in the pantry to make green eggs and ham. He snickered and gave me a heated look, remembering that first ‘platonic’ night together and my own blurted rhyme, and kissed my cheek. How had so much changed in just a few days?

Jenny and Candice joined us after a short while, and they pushed me out of the kitchen to give them room to work. I attempted to play Puppies and Kittens with Betsy, but I still couldn’t figure out the rules, and eventually I sent her to pounce her father and grandfather awake. Everyone stumbled into the living room and Betsy immediately handed out stockings. Fidget spinners and little toys for all, as well as dog and cat biscuits from our favorite bakery to enjoy in our shifted form. With everyone’s excitement temporarily pacified —because even we adults got excited on Christmas morning— we then took part in a decadent breakfast feast. Oh my lord, just the bacon alone! I filled my plate with maple bacon scones, slathered with homemade slow-cooker bacon jam and teared up from the beauty of it.

“Are you like this around all cured meats?” Candice asked, but I was too busy stuffing my face to answer. “Don’t worry, I’ll give Tobias the recipe.”

We moved on to gift-opening. I was so glad I’d gotten presents for people, because there had been presents under the tree for me, too. They were small, practical, and thoughtful. Based on the look on Tobias’ face when I opened them, I had a feeling he had a hand in each one. My gifts were silly in comparison, but they seemed to like them. Betsy tore into her presents like only a small child can and pleaded with her mom to try out her new microwave, while Felix argued that his daughter wanted us to set up her new, huge, plastic playhouse.

We helped clear the floor and I seemed to be the only one interested in setting things up. Tobias tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Watch, this is the best part.”

Sure enough, there was a reason for the family to buy two large gifts that would just have to be put into storage. Felix and Betsy had both shifted and were pouncing in and out of the boxes, batting around balls of wrapping paper, and generally having a spectacular time.

“They’ll be at this for an hour,” Candice told me. “Have you wished your family a Merry Christmas yet? I know it’s still really early there, but you did say they’re cowboys.”

I wanted to whine, ‘Do I have to?’ But I did have to. So I forced my lips into a smile. “Living on a ranch, they do get up before dawn in the winter. Thank you for reminding me.”

I kissed her on the cheek, found my phone, and went out into the hallway for some pseudo-privacy. At least I’d be getting my parents before the entire clan gathered. The phone rang four times and I began to hope that I’d have to wait until later, when my alpha father answered.

“¡Malcito! ¡Feliz Navidad!”

“Feliz Navidad, Padre.” It was nice to hear his voice. I loved both of my fathers. Neither of them understood me well, but I never doubted they loved me. They just showed it differently than the Sandersons. Papá, my omega father, had very set concepts of what an alpha and omega ought to be. But Padre encouraged me to find happiness away from the ranch and be ‘un alfa alternativo.’ Not a modern alpha —those were all CEOs— just an alternative sort of alpha.

“¡Feliz Navidad, Malcito! Diego, Diego, ponlo en el altavoz.” Papá called from far away. Padre complied, putting me on speakerphone. I could hear the familiar sounds of my omega father cooking, but it sounded like they were the only ones awake and indoors. Six o’clock in the morning was very good timing — I’d have to thank Candice.

“Feliz Navidad, Papá.”

“¡Dime que no estás solo hoy! ¡No puedes atraer a un omega sentándote como un triste bulto en tu pequeña cueva!”

“¡Para, Papá!” It was rude to essentially tell my father to shut up, but I was so tired of this song and dance. Without thinking, I told him I wasn’t alone and I wasn’t with humans —which, apparently, was worse than being alone— but I was celebrating with a shifter family. And yes, they did have a nice omega son about my age and he was the one who invited me. But no, we were just friends. I was not embarrassed by my patán family, although I didn’t deny that they were hicks. This was an unplanned pity invitation. At least, I tried to get them to believe that.

They went from trying to make me come out of my shell and enjoy the holidays, to counting the weeks and discussing adjustments to the cattle birth schedule so they could get here in time for the christening of my imaginary quadruplets.

“¡No hay bebés!” I found myself shouting into the phone. There are no babies. Papá began to sob. He wailed something unintelligible, and Padre took the phone and brought me into another room to chastise me for talking to Papá like that.

My family had outdated views on harlotry, so I told him, “Estamos cortejando, Padre.”

We are courting.

“Tu omega es el omega mandón,” Padre concluded, having put the pieces together. “Tobiasanderson.”

I wanted to say yes my omega was Bossy Tobias Sanderson. I wanted to tell him everything, from the date to this morning. I wanted to share all the wonderful things about the Sandersons, including baking together and our midnight fun run and Tobias’ non-wolf niece.

I wanted to hear Padre tell me how to be an Alpha and a professional and not lose my mind. I wanted him to tell me to trust my instincts. I wanted him to tell me how to claim my bossy omega.

And I wanted to hide everything because I could not handle hearing anything negative from his lips. So I promised I’d tell him more if things progressed, asked him to give Papá a hug for me, and promised to call my Papá tonight because it was important to soothe omegas before they went to sleep.

I walked back into Tobias’ apartment to see four adults looking extraordinarily focused on random tasks and one little girl waiting within inches of the door. “You were talking funny and shouting about babies! Daddy says your family has their own language!”

“I was speaking Spanish. A lot of families speak it in other parts of the world,” I explained, managing not to laugh at the idea of a secret family language. More people in the world spoke Spanish as their primary language than spoke English. But her gut reaction was why my family lived in Montana. We barely had to hide who we were — any odd shifter behaviors were just attributed to our being ‘foreigners,’ no matter how many decades we’d lived on our ranch.

“Why didn’t you tell me you’re Hispanic?” Tobias asked.

“Ummm… My last name is Reyes and… did you ever read my resume?” He looked at me like I was insane and, to be fair, I did know him well enough by now that I should have known he’d only skimmed it. I had a computer science degree, I was an alpha, and I was willing to be his PA for shitty pay. “Well, now you know.”

“I don’t speak Spanish,” he told me when I settled on the floor next to him. “But that got… a little loud. Everything okay?”

“Don’t worry your pretty little omega head about it,” I teased and was slammed by the scent of his anger and hurt. “I’m joking. Yes, everything’s okay. My fathers get a little dramatic sometimes. We had a minor misunderstanding, but I’ll call tonight once tempers are down.”

Felix appeared out of nowhere —damned cats!— and started ruffling my hair, asking in babytalk, “Who’s a good boy? You are! You’re a good boy!”

Betsy laughed and mimicked her father, telling me what a good boy I was. My only recourse was to shift into wolf form and chase her around the room. She was the one who knocked over the lamp, but somehow it was all my fault, and Candice ordered us all to get dressed and go make a snowman.

I stayed for a few more hours, but eventually I said my goodbyes. I got a feeling they needed a little Sanderson family time, I needed to call my Papa, and there were only so many times a man can watch the Tom & Jerry holiday movie in one night.

My Papá forgave me, but warned me against scheming, seductive omegas. I got angry, as he’d intended, and told him about the matchmaker. Papá then peppered me with questions about Tobias’ family and our hypothetical wedding, and educated me on how to properly care for a pregnant omega. By the time the conversation was over, I was worrying about college funds for my imaginary sextuplets.

I joined Buzz and his friends in their annual Christmas gaming tournament. We played videogames and swore and ate junk food, but I was exhausted. Before long, I was texting Tobias and claiming he needed me to come home and give him a backrub.

Tobias had used my spare key to let himself in, and I was greeted by the sight of a naked, grinning omega brandishing a jar of slow-cooker bacon jam. Oh, this was a very Merry Christmas indeed!