Dottie Hart glanced out her window. She longed to stretch her wings and go flying just one more time. It was getting closer to winter. It would soon be too cold to fly outside safely, and she’d be stuck flying inside all the time. Winter was the worst. The only saving grace of the whole stupid season was Christmas. She loved having a white Christmas and couldn’t wait to start decorating now that Thanksgiving was over. She already had a tree and had picked up a lot of decorations during the Black Friday sales. The house was going to look so festive soon.

But even the onset of Christmas season couldn’t make up for the snow and freezing temperatures. She was going to be depressed for a day or two, because she wouldn’t be able to get out and stretch her wings one last time. Once she got out of her funk, she would start putting up all the decorations. 

It was her own silly fault she didn’t go out and fly. She was too embarrassed to go out shifted in Maple Creek. It wasn’t uncommon for small shifters to become anxious shifting in new places, but she still felt so childish.

She had a difficult time keeping her animal in control when she was nervous. She didn’t know the town well enough to keep her nerves in check. Unlike most shifters, Dottie’s animal was deeply affected by her human emotions. For the others, one of the best parts of being a shifter was getting to put your human emotions on hold when you turned into an animal.

Many shifters said that they were much calmer after shifting and that it helped them relax. Not Dottie. Her mother thought it was because of a childhood trauma. Neither of her parents could shift, and both of her shifter grandparents had died before she was born. Her parents had read every book they could find to help their daughter learn to shift. On the advice of those books, they’d taken her to the park to get her used to shifting in nature. Usually, she shifted in the house, but she had to learn how to be her animal in its natural habitat.

As a butterfly shifter, she wasn’t supposed to be in much danger as long as she followed her parents’ rules, but she had been young and very curious. She’d wandered away while she was shifted and had gotten attacked by dog. One of her wings still had a scar that ruined her perfect symmetry. Her mother had blamed herself, and Dottie had developed a fear of big animals when she was shifted.

She also hated being shifted somewhere she wasn’t very familiar with. She’d only moved to Maple Creek two months earlier. Her great-aunt had died and had left Dottie’s mother her house.

Dottie hadn’t known the woman well, but her great-aunt had been fond of Dottie’s mom. Her mother had no need for another house, but before they could sell it, it had to be cleaned out and Dottie’s great-aunt’s stuff had to be sorted through. They lived in Indianapolis, and it was a long drive down to Maple Creek. They didn’t want to leave their home empty for long stretches of time, so it was a problem. The easiest solution was to give the task to Dottie. She wasn’t doing anything and didn’t have a job. That meant that Dottie was the one stuck going back and forth doing all the cleaning.

Originally, it had seemed like a tedious but easy task. How wrong she had been! The whole process hadn’t been going well. It had been a long time since she had gone somewhere new. Dottie had moved out for a while in college, but she had lived with roommates. Even then, it was only different apartment buildings around her home town.

This was the first time she had ever truly been in a new place. She had never had to make new friends before. ’She’d never had to learn a new route to the grocery store or where the closest hospital was if, God forbid, something went wrong. It was all a little overwhelming. She had tried to stick to her routine as best she could, but it wasn’t working.

Routines were her favorite thing. They kept her sane. When she was comfortable, she could feel free to express herself and let her animal roam. When her routine was messed up or she couldn’t find her groove, she got very sad and anxious.

She was aware how strange she was. Even among her own kind, she felt like an outcast. No other shifter she’d ever met had problems shifting like she did. Everyone else could just drop their clothes wherever they were and set their animal free.

She often wondered if she had so many issues because of her rigid behavior or because of her animal. Dottie had never met another butterfly shifter before. Her animal wasn’t scary or strong. If she found herself in a dangerous situation, her only option was to run. That wasn’t how most humans pictured shifters or how shifters wanted to be portrayed.

At least she could make friends with the other small shifters. She hadn’t met many in real life, and none of them had shared her fear of shifting in unfamiliar places, but they did all shared her feelings of being excluded from the larger shifter community. She had met many mouse, songbird, and rabbit shifters online and had commiserated with them about the awful feeling. On the forums she frequented, there were special sections for non-threatening shifters like her and the reptiles and insects.

Dottie shuddered, thinking what it would feel like to shift and end up in the body of an ant or a spider. It made her skin crawl even imagining it. When she was feeling particularly sorry for herself, she would go and hang out on the insect forums. At least being a butterfly wasn’t as bad as a being a bug. People thought her shifter was beautiful, if a little frivolous. There was small comfort in that.

Now that she’d moved, most of her days were spent on the internet, talking with her online friends. She wasn’t just having trouble making new friends; she also couldn’t find a job. As usual. She was so lonely, and she desperately wanted to have a reason to get out of the house.

That loneliness was what had prompted her to sign up online to try to forge new bonds. She had signed up on dating sites, meetups, and one friend finder site. There were so many websites and apps that were supposed to help people connect, and she was going to try them all. Her parents had even encouraged her to test them all out.

Her daily routine was now very simple. After she woke up, she checked all her accounts to see if she had any matches or friendship requests. After she had finished that, she would move on to check for jobs. She usually spent two to four hours a day applying for anything she was remotely capable of doing. Even if she didn’t fit all the qualifications, she would apply. She had an associate’s degree in entrepreneurship, and she figured that had to count for something, even if she had little real on-the-job experience.

She sighed to herself again and looked outside. This was the time of day when, back home, she would be getting off her part-time job. She would have come home, shed all her clothes, and opened the window to fly away. She yearned to feel the sun on her wings one more time before the snow fell.

Maybe she could take a quick trip home over the weekend if it stayed warm. Her parents would be thrilled to see her again. She had just been home for Thanksgiving, and her parents had said that they missed her very much. They Skyped her every day, but it wasn’t enough. She hated being stuck in this old house alone!

Dottie flopped on her bed in frustration. It would be better if she could get comfortable in the old house and her new neighborhood, but she just wasn’t sure how to do that yet. How was she ever going to be able to move out on her own if she was this helpless?

“Dottie?”

She sat up quickly. She was losing her mind. She had been thinking about her parents for so long that she’d imagined she’d heard her dad’s voice. Great.

“Dottie?”

There it was again. She got up and went to the staircase.  “Dad?”

“You up there, honey?”

Her dad was at the base of the stairs, smiling at her. Seeing his familiar figure was too much for her. Dottie broke down into tears and ran down the stairs into her dad’s arms.

“It’s been years since you jumped into my arms like this,” her father said. He cleared his throat. “You’re making your old man tear up. Are you okay?”

“I am now.” Her face was buried in his shoulder, but she didn’t want to let go. “What are you doing here?”

“We’re here for Christmas,” her mother said, coming in the door. “We can both work from home until the New Year, and we figured we can just as easily work here. And we get the added bonus of seeing our baby girl every day.”

Dottie let go of her dad to hug her mom. “You guys are the best.”

“If you love us now, wait until you see what we found.” Her mom dug in her coat pocket and produced a flyer. “Check this out.”

It was a flyer for a job fair in the park district. The jobs were seasonal, but she would be sure to meet people from town if she managed to snag one. Plus, spending a month in the park district would help her get to know the town better.

This was it! She had to get one of these jobs—she just had to. She was going to wear her nicest clothes and print her resume out. She knew it was silly to set her hopes on something so small, but she absolutely had to get this job.

“This sounds good,” she said. “Thank you.”

“Okay, now help us get our suitcases in here and show us where to set up an office,” her mom said.

“The formal living room,” Dottie said.

“Great idea,” her dad said. “We’re so happy to be here.”

“I’m happy to have you.”

Her parents were so helpful. They had only been here for two minutes, and she was already a million times happier. She had company and a good chance at a new job. She was bound to make at least one new friend now. Her stay in Maple Creek was suddenly looking much brighter.

“You guys always know how to make my day a million times better.” She hugged her dad again.

He set his work bag down in the living room. “This place looks better already. You must have been working your tail off down here.”

Dottie beamed. “I have been working hard. When I’m cleaning, at least my mind isn’t dwelling on all the bad parts of being here.”

“I’m sorry we didn’t come down sooner.” Her mom gave her a small smile. “We won’t leave you alone again for so long. Promise.”

Dottie smiled weakly back at her mom. This wasn’t exactly what she had planned.

Her mom’s smile faded. “You’re not mad at us, are you?”

Her mom could always read her like a book. Sometimes, Dottie was sure her mom knew what she was thinking before she even knew it herself.

 “I wanted to surprise you guys with a clean and decorated house for Christmas. I guess I won’t get to do that now.”

Her mom sighed and put her hand on her chest. “You scared me there for a minute, pumpkin. We don’t mind helping you clean this place up. We expected too much asking you to do this all on your own.”

“But I wanted to do it on my own,” Dottie said quietly.

As overwhelmed and lonely as she was, this had been one of the first tasks her parents had put her in charge of. She had never been the one making the big decisions before. It was scary but exciting. As happy as she was to see her parents, a small part of her was sad that she wouldn’t get to do this all on her own. It looked like she was going to have to find something else to do this winter to build up her confidence.