Camilla
“Damn, this car is sweet,” Sasha says as she glides her fingers along the seat next to where she’s sitting on the passenger side of the Mercedes E-Class Wagon I’m driving. “Do you think he’s giving you this car?”
“Like I said, I don’t know. Christopher only told me that Ellis purchased it and insisted I drive it.” I roll my eyes. “Mr. Burke believes my car is a death trap.”
“Well, can I have that death trap? I could really use some wheels.”
“We’ll see. With everything up in the air, I might end up back at the apartment.” Propping my elbow on the door, I lean my head against the window.
“Momma, when we be at the park?” Liam asks from the backseat.
“Soon, sweetie. Only a few more minutes.”
“How long do you think Ellis will go without speaking to you,” my sister asks. What’s up with her? She’s never this nosy about my life.
“I don’t know, Sasha. It’s been three days, so surely soon. Christopher is loving it, though, having to be the go-between.”
“Oh, yes, I forgot about the love triangle.”
“Will you stop? It’s not a love triangle at all. That would require me feeling love for some part of this 180° cluster fuck.”
“Oh, look at you, Smarty Pants,” she replies.
“Moooomma, you said a bad word. A verwy bad word.” Catching a glimpse of him in the rearview mirror, I spot his stern expression and scrunch my nose.
“You’re right, Liam, and Momma’s sorry. We don’t use that word.”
“How does he even know that’s a bad word?” Sasha asks.
I shoot her a sideways glance. “You’re kidding, right? I’m sure you get the credit for that one.”
“Boss says that bad word, and he puts monies in my piggy bank every time. I got a lot of monies in there.”
Sasha giggles first, and I can’t help but join in, and then … I can’t help but cry. The buildup of tears tumble fast and heavy, a snowball, picking up speed, except this one is warm and salty, full of disappointment and a bottomless sadness I can’t explain.
“Momma? You OK?” Liam asks. His sweet, concerned voice envelops me like a baby blanket to soothe my hurting heart. I look back at him, and he’s straining his head, eager to see my face. Swiping my tears away, I suck up my emotions.
“I’m fine, and look, there’s the park. Are you ready to play?” Thankfully, his attention span is all of three seconds, so his mind is now in the fun zone as I pull into a parking spot on this beautiful Sunday.
“I’ve got him,” Sasha mutters before hopping out of the car. I use the time to find a tissue in my purse and collect myself.
Ellis and I barely know each other, so why does it hurt so much that he isn’t speaking to me? If I’m honest, it’s because my mind was beginning to imagine the possibility of a future with him, and for some incomprehensible reason, he saw it, too.
Hell, he pushed me that direction, and fast, but it was a stranglehold, and what can be built from that?
Remembering I came here to enjoy time with my sister and son, I exit the brand new vehicle and stroll over to where Sasha is helping Liam climb a small slide.
“Momma, watch me do it all by myself.” The midday sun gifts me the twinkle in his blue eyes and the sparkle to his teeth as he grins. All at once, I really notice it. I see how much he resembles a Burke. I see … Ellis, and I fight back the tears all over again.
***
“He’s sound asleep back there,” Sasha says after twisting in her seat to check on him. I pull up in front of my old apartment, and after searching around in my purse, I withdraw an envelope and hand it to her.
“I already paid next month’s rent, and I’m paying the utilities online. You should be covered, but here’s some grocery and spending money.”
Handing it to her, I keep a hold of one end. “Promise me you’ll find a job soon. There’s enough extra in here to buy yourself a nice outfit to wear to interviews.”
“I promise, and thank you for the money and for lunch today.”
“If I find out I’m staying at Ellis’s, then I’ll give you my car to drive, but I can take you to work in the meantime.”
“I promise to look this week.”
Releasing the envelope, I manage a weak smile.
“I’m worried about you,” she says. “You’re falling for him, and I don’t want to see him hurt you the way Tony did. It was messed up what that man did to you.”
“Yes, it was, but I got Liam out of the deal. Don’t worry about me. I always find a way to survive, even in the darkest of situations.
“Ellis Burke is difficult, demanding and confusing, but he’s also generous and sometimes kind. This situation could’ve been a hell of a lot worse.”
I shrug my shoulders. “He and I are at an impasse, but he’s too impatient for something not to happen soon. I’ll let you know when I have the answers.”
“I don’t say it enough, but I love you.”
“I love you, too. Now, get out of the car before I cry again. We’ll talk soon.” I wait to ensure Sasha gets inside the apartment.
Even though she doesn’t contribute a dime, I feel guilty leaving her here, especially when I think of what kind of house I get to return to. She was sober today, and that makes me want to give her the world.