Chapter Two
Several minutes after arriving home flustered and off balance, Aislin turned when she heard the door to her home open and shut swiftly. “Och, Aislin. Can you at least try to not push away every lad in the tuath with your wee nasty attitude?” her brother said with a grunt as he set his sword down— gently, she noticed. Clearly, he was getting into the habit of not angering his wife with his abrupt returns, even if Neassa was wide awake and chewing on her wee fist as Treasa held her in her arms.
Aislin’s mother sighed from across the room while she sliced carrots for the stew already bubbling away in the cauldron suspended over the hearth, the delicious scents of boar meat and herbs filling their home and causing Aislin’s stomach to growl even louder. “What has the lass done now?” Why did her mother insist on speaking about her as if she were not present? Her mother, Ceara, was one of the legendary Sisters of Danu and was well known as one of the most beautiful women in all Ériu with her bright red wavy hair— always tamed and glossy, unlike Aislin’s wild locks. Somehow, her mother had a way of making her feel as if she was a lass of eight years old, not eight and ten.
Eoin walked over to his wife, Treasa, and gave her a very long, slow kiss that made Aislin grunt and look away. “Oh, you know, mother. A nice, handsome warrior puts himself out there for her favor and she insults him, as usual.”
Aislin snorted and stood, walking over to the large stone slab where piles of diced carrots awaited the cauldron. Grabbing a handful and popping them into her mouth, her mother smacked her hand away and continued chopping. “You cannot possibly be referring to Daniel,” Aislin said as she chewed. “He is a nice enough lad, but not the one for me. You cannot blame me for pushing him away.”
“I agree, mo leanbh,” Garreth, Aislin and Eoin’s father, nodded from the corner where he worked at sharpening his blade. “You are a strong lass and require an even stronger lad.” She smiled at her papa for defending her, but grimaced inwardly. Her father, as protective as he was, still had every intention of finding a strong man for her to wed. He could not possibly bring himself to listen to her arguments against marriage. Aye, her parents had a very strong marriage filled with love and all sorts of disgusting displays of affection, but that did not mean she required such things in her own life.
“Nay. I am not referring to Daniel, Lin. I am referring to Alastar. The man is about as good a man as you will ever find, and you turn him away as if he were not one of the best warriors in the land,” Eoin said wryly as he took Neassa from Treasa’s arms. “I invited the man over for the evening meal and he declined. Most certainly because he prefers to avoid your constantly rude behavior.”
Aislin put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot. Telling a man she was not interested in his advances was not rude. Perhaps she could scowl at him less… or roll her eyes less… or turn her back on him less… or— “Aislin, you’re too much like I was when I was your age. Do not allow your temper to push everyone else away from you. One day you will change your mind about marriage and when that day comes, you will have nay lads left who are willing to wed you.” Her mama wagged her finger and stared her down with her emerald green eyes. Aislin was proud to have inherited those eyes, but mayhap she had also inherited her mama’s temper.
Before she could say another word, her father stood up and scowled. “I will not have you insulting the new warriors, Lin. Alastar is one of the heroes of the very war that put Tuathal on the throne. He is to be honored and you do not have to marry the lad, but I do demand you respect him as a man who fights for our land.” Her father’s firm voice brooked no argument and she gave none, although she wished to demand everyone stop treating her like she was still a wee lass.
“Alastar is a good man,” Treasa nodded. “When I was stolen away by Jeoffrey,” she looked sideways at Eoin to make sure he would not fly into a fit of rage over the incident last year that had led to her being taken, held hostage, forced to marry the enemy, then saved by that same man— who was now working peaceably alongside Eoin. By the flair of Eoin’s nostrils, Aislin could tell he still despised discussing the topic, though he had accepted the past and moved on. Jeoffrey was happily married now and had proven himself honorable. “Alastar had been my first companion, of a sort. He had a ready smile and friendly word for everyone. And every lass in the entire camp, aside from myself of course, was half in love with the man.”
“And that is one of the reasons I reject him,” Aislin said as she snuck another piece of carrot from under her mother’s nose. “He is so full of himself. Thinks he can flash his cursed smile at me and gain entrance to my bed—”
“Aislin!” her father barked at her from across the room. She sniggered at his obvious discomfort about the topic of men in her bed. What exactly did her father believe would happen if she accepted the suit of a man like Alastar, who, as Treasa had already stated, was very used to getting his way with the lassies?
“Relax, Papa. Tis the very thing I aim to avoid when I send a man like him away.”
“Still,” Ceara said as she put her knife down and began scooping up piles of carrots to add to the stew. “You owe the man an apology.”
“What? I do not!” Aislin scoffed and crossed her arms.
“He went down to the gathering hall alone to take his meal, instead of coming here, Lin… because of you,” Eoin said accusingly.
“Och! So now everyone in my family likes him more than they like me?”
“Do not be ridiculous, Lin. Of course not. But he is new to this tuath and has nay family of his own. He should always feel welcome here,” her mother said as she dropped the last of the carrots in and wiped her hands on a beige linen apron around her slim waist. “I want you to go down to the gathering hall, apologize for your inconsiderate manners, and invite the lad over for a meal.”
“He will get the wrong idea. Why not send Eoin?”
“Nay. Tis you who offends him. Tis you who will apologize.” Her mother waved her away as if she were not more than a wee lass and turned away to stir the stew. “Be off with you, Lin.”
She could say nay, but her papa did not tolerate anyone arguing with her mama. Mama was a strong woman in her own right, never needing her father’s defense, yet receiving it anyway. And yet, her mama had learned over the years to accept her papa’s protection, even when she did not require it. Was that a part of marriage? Simply standing back and allowing someone to speak for you or fight your battles when you were capable of fighting your own? She was not certain, but the thought rankled her.
“Fine,” she said with a forced smile. “I will fetch him.”
“Good lass,” she heard her papa say as she was already half way out of the door. She wanted to roll her eyes, but she resisted. She had to admit that she was unnecessarily obstinate at times. She could accept that mayhap she did have a temper and a bad attitude. While she didn’t like the thought of losing her independence to a man, she also did not want to push everyone away. She could find the middle ground. Mayhap she could compromise and seek a companionship with Alastar. There was not a man or women in their tuath who did not like the lad… except mayhap Daniel. Aye, she would find him, apologize for her constant scowls, and try to start over again with him.
As she walked through the village, she took the time to slow her stride and allow the cold night breeze to soothe her flaming cheeks. So seldom did she allow herself to relax. It felt like every day was a battle for freedom, to be allowed to hunt in peace or explore the forest and mountains around without a man believing she needed assistance. To simply walk and look up at the night sky dotted with sparkling stars and low-lying clouds drifting lazily along was a rare treat and she breathed deeply, feeling an easy smile spread across her face.
Smoke billowed out of several pointy thatched roofs and laughter from the families within filled the air with a sense of peace. She did truly love her family and knew they meant well. She vowed to return home with Alastar and spend some peaceful moments with her own family, perhaps allow herself to laugh a little more.
Even without looking straight ahead, she knew she approached the gathering hall, for loud laughter drifted on the air and the acrid smell of several tallow candles burning infiltrated her nostrils. Someone was blowing a horn in the background while a few men sang off-key. She smiled and felt light with ease as her eyes locked on the entrance to the long rectangular hall, the doors wide open in welcome.
Stepping inside, she was first hit with a wall of smoke and flickering light but quickly adjusted to both as she worked her way through the affable crowd. Friendly and familiar faces smiled at her and waved in welcome as she passed, and she could not help but smile and wave back. These were her people. As the daughter of the king of Coraindt, before they had all moved into Ráth Mór after the war, she knew her family to be a powerful and well-respected one. Moreover, there was a sense of belonging here that was beyond simply being from a powerful family. These people knew her and respected her for who she was and what she brought to the tuath. That knowledge made her feel lighter than she had in a long while.
First spotting the large, new warrior Àdhamh who came over from Alba with Alastar and Jeoffrey, she noticed his wee sister Maggie standing beside him. Maggie was blushing brightly and clearly averting her gaze from something in front of her, trying to focus on her brother’s face instead. She knew Maggie and Àdhamh were Alastar’s companions. Mayhap he was close by. A few steps brought Aislin closer to them and the table they stood around… and she froze in her steps.
Something so disturbing was happening right before her eyes. Her stomach knotted and an unexpected combination of disgust and envy filled her mind with jumbled thoughts. She could not look away, and yet, with every swipe of Alastar’s tongue across the serving lassie’s enormous breasts, Aislin felt her heart constrict in her chest and her breath labor to release. Her cheeks flamed, just as Maggie’s had and now she understood why. The man was foul! How could he participate in such a public display of lewdness? How could he spend every day trying to make her feel like she was special to him when he could easily run off to the hall only moments later and… and… she couldn’t even finish her thoughts.
Alastar’s tongue dipped deeply into the woman’s cleavage as she rumbled with laughter. The lass was straddling him and very obviously grinding herself against his groin while he groaned. Aislin had seen enough. With a loud exhale, finally letting all the air out of her lungs, she tried to step away before he saw her.
“Aislin…” his voice trailed off in confusion as he finally came up for air and wiped something— probably his own saliva, off his chin. He was disgusting. How had she even thought she could be companions with a man such as he?
She shook her head and blinked rapidly, hoping to find herself somewhere else, anywhere but here, but the woman continued to sit in his lap as he stared dumbly in her direction. “Aislin?” he repeated, this time actually looking shameful… as if a man capable of delving his tongue into the ample bosom of a woman in a public hall was able to feel an emotion such as shame.
Finally coming back to her senses, she spun on her heels and fled as fast as she could, pushing through the crowd in a panic. She needed air. To think she actually believed that he wanted her above all others. Not that she had returned those emotions, but this was just another reminder of why she must always avoid men, love, marriage… because men were fickle creatures who perused one woman by day and then found pleasure with another woman by night.
Finally reaching the entrance, Aislin sprinted across the village, her leather boots crunching the gravel beneath her. The very wind that had moments ago soothed her nerves, now slapped her in the face, a cruel reminder that even nature could turn its back on her at any moment.
“Aislin!” she heard his voice shouting from behind her, heard his swift footsteps coming up on her. Curse him and whatever he believed he could say to make her even consider a friendship with him ever again. “Stop!”
Picking up her stride, she shouted into the wind as her hair whipped behind her. “Go away!” She truly wished he would leave her be. She did not want to look at him, not after what she had witnessed him doing to that serving lass.
A strong hand wrapped around her arm, making her yelp in pain as she was wrenched backward, colliding into his body. The wind knocked out of her, she coughed and heaved, trying to catch her breath. “Let go… of… me,” she growled as she tried to pull away, but he held on firmly.
“Why were you looking for me?” he asked gently.
A snort escaped her lips. “I had intended to apologize for my abruptness this past fortnight with you. I had intended to seek peace between us and mayhap start over, as companions.”
“Truly?” he questioned, cocking a surprised brow and loosening his hold on her arm.
Jerking away from him, she stepped back and shook her head. “You should thank my brother and Treasa for that. They had me convinced you weren’t the foul beast I had treated you as. It appears I was in the right, all along.” She turned and began to walk away again, but he sprinted up in front of her and blocked her path.
“I would like that,” he said with an arrogant smile. “To start over again.”
“Not going to happen,” she replied dryly, trying to step around him, but the man was like a wall of muscle and several hands taller than her, blocking her path completely. “Not after what I just witnessed.”
“Why do you care about what you just witnessed?” he asked, putting his hands on her shoulder to prevent her from trying to flee again.
“Only because I find you disgusting,” she spat. “What sort of man does… that… in a public place?”
Alastar bore down on her with his intense blue eyes and curled his lip. “A man who has not touched a lassie since setting foot in a new land, because he was hoping to start a courtship with a certain special lass. A man who realized just today that said lass will never return his affections. A man who simply sought a reaction from a lass other than scorn. A man who decided to give up on love and seek his pleasure elsewhere.” He scowled at her and she felt her heart rate speed up at his words. Love? The man was mad if thought he loved her after only a fortnight and even madder if he believed he could win her over simply because he flashed his smile or pressed his attentions onto her.
“Well, you succeeded. She looked very… ready to pleasure you,” Aislin said, feeling her face flush at the memory of his tongue on that woman’s bosom.
“And yet, here I am. Why would I leave her, to be with you?”
Anger boiled in her blood. Were all women so disposable to this man? Would he one day leave her and chase another? Of course, he would. “Because you are a fickle fool, just like all men! Now leave me be!” she yelled while shoving him with all her strength. She growled when his body did not even budge an inch. To her surprise, he stepped aside with a frown and watched in silence as she strode toward her home. She hoped never to have to speak to him again. He infuriated her, make her wish to pull her hair out and scream into the night.
Barging into her home, the door slammed against the wall and all eyes watched her with concern. Looking around the room, she noticed her cousins Flynn and Brennain had arrived with her Auntie Una and Uncle Brocc. As much as she wanted to rail at her family for forcing her to apologize to that foul man, she did not enjoy showing her temper to the rest of the family, so she pursed her lips and took a deep breath to cool her nerves.
“Where is Alastar?” her mother asked, sitting beside the fire with Aislin’s aunt, Una.
“He was… occupied,” Aislin murmured and walked over to the hearth to plop down on a cushion next to her mama, who crinkled her brow in confusion but knew better than to ask further questions.
“You did the right thing by apologizing to him,” Eoin nodded. Treasa smiled sweetly next to Eoin, rocking Neassa to sleep. Aislin chewed her bottom lip to prevent herself from telling them the truth, that he was not worthy of her apology or her time.
“’Tis a shame he could not join us. Mayhap next time,” her papa added. Why did everyone love Alastar so much? Did they not see how he used his good looks and charming words as a weapon? Did the man have no depth? Had he never felt pain in his life or the need to fight for something bigger, the way she fought to keep her freedom and be an equal to the men around her?
Her cousin Brennain snorted in the corner as he took a sip of mead from his clay mug. His green eyes sparkled with mischief. “Alastar has been well-behaved ever since arriving in Ériu, but I knew the man back in Alba. Nay doubt he has better ways of… spending his time, than joining our family for a meal.”
Aislin crinkled her nose and blushed wildly. Brennain had always been the one person in the family able to get straight to the point and he apparently knew Alastar well. He looked at her and must have noticed her blush. “You are wise to avoid his attentions, Lin. I do not want to have to kill the lad. I like him too much.”
“Och, where Aislin is concerned, I believe Alastar’s intentions are more serious than he lets on,” Eoin added.
She had heard enough. Eoin wanted to marry his wee sister off, but Brennain really understood her. He also valued his freedom and avoided marriage at all cost. He was not some besotted fool like Eoin, who had loved Treasa since he was a young lad. Eoin had wanted to marry Treasa most of his life. He had no idea what it felt like to crave independence. “Must you speak about me as if I am not even in the room, Eoin?” she grumbled. “And it does not matter what his intentions are toward me because my intention is to avoid the man completely. All men!”
Her family went silent at her words. The hearth fire popped loudly and suddenly doubled in size before dying back down, causing Aislin to startle. Turning to look at her mother, she saw concern and sadness written across her face. As one of the Sisters of Danu, her mother was legendary for her ability to control fire and growing up, a loud popping fire had often been a sign of her mother’s distress. She did not mean to be a source of distress for her loving mama. If only everyone around her could understand who she was and stop pressing her to be what they wanted her to be.
Suddenly, the need to flee everyone and everything consumed her. “I need air.” She needed her favorite spot where the waters ran peacefully and the moonlight shone off the surface of the river while fireflies danced on the surface. She needed to sit upon her rock and stare into the black depths of the water, the only place she felt truly at ease. “I will return shortly.” Sending her mama a reassuring smile, she walked over to the door, slung her quiver full of arrows over her shoulder, and grabbed her bow. She knew she would not require her weapon in the dark, but leaving her home without it never felt right. Without glancing back, she opened the door and left her home, relishing the feel of the night air on her face.
***
“Something is not right.” Alastar looked over at Eoin and quirked a brow at his companion’s abrupt statement.
“Aye?” Alastar replied, wiping his face with a linen square and putting down the axe in his hand. The wood he had chopped sat beside him in a neat pile. He had been so focused on the task, losing himself in the simple physical work of chopping wood, he had allowed his mind to wander and did not notice the approach of Eoin or Jeoffrey.
“Aislin just walked past your house and went into the forest,” Jeoffrey explained as if that was not a daily occurrence. “And you did not speak to her or even pay her attention. You did not even notice.”
His heart beat erratically in his chest. Aye, he had noticed. He had noticed her every day since she had found him with Janice. Four days had passed, and it had taken a disciplined restraint to honor her wishes and leave her alone. She had made it clear she was disgusted with him. He knew when a lass was a lost cause. Though it pained him to let go of the dream of a life with Aislin…the only dream about a lass he had ever dared to consider, he was a wise man and knew when to cut his losses. After their confrontation in the middle of the village four nights past, he had gone home alone and drank ale until he fell into a deep, numb sleep. He knew he had done naught wrong. How could the lass turn him down repeatedly, then act as if he had personally scorned her when he sought physical relief from another woman? Why did he feel like he had lost something he never even had?
Still, he cursed himself for his lack of will power. If Aislin was his, he knew his eyes and his heart would never stray. But she was not his, and a man had needs. And now, he had no chance with Aislin and felt like a bastard every time he thought of finding a lass to comfort him. The worst part was that his need for comfort, for the first time in his life, went beyond simple pleasure. He was lonely. He sought companionship. But he knew instinctively that only one lass could give him what he truly sought, so seeking it with any other lass was futile. He had not so much as stepped foot in the gathering hall since that night. It was like the lass had walked away from him and, in doing so, had taken all that mattered to him with her.
Realizing his mates still hovered over him, clearly expecting a response, he shrugged and grabbed a jug of water he had placed next to the logs, taking a long pull of the cool liquid. “She told me she was not interested in me. I’m not a fool. I know when to back away.”
Jeoffrey balked at that and Alastar scowled. “Bollocks. Something happened between the two of you.” Jeoffrey crossed his arms over his chest.
“Aye. She came home in a temper the night we told her to apologize to you. She said you were occupied and then she left the house,” Eoin added. “What happened?”
Alastar groaned and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. He really would prefer to keep his humiliation to himself. And why was humiliation the dominant emotion he was feeling? He was not prone to that emotion. He should be irritated that his plans to plow Janice had been ruined. He should be annoyed that Aislin always pushed him away and made him feel like a bastard for doing as she wished by seeking his pleasures elsewhere. Where was this cursed humiliation coming from? Mayhap because the person who meant most to him in this world had seen him in a precarious position and judged him lacking.
“Well?” Jeoffrey prodded, poking him in the shoulder.
“Did you just poke me, mate?” Alastar grunted and felt a small smile form in the corner of his mouth.
“Aye, I poked you. You are being evasive and… unlike yourself. We know something happened.”
“Aislin has been in a foul mood, more than usual, and refuses to say aught to any of us. Something happened and my sister, who pretends to not be affected by you, is overly-affected.”
That caught his attention. His heart skipped erratically in his chest. She was affected? “Truly?” Alastar asked, perking up for the first time in four days. He sat up straight and looked between Jeoffrey and Eoin expectantly.
“Och. You are a blathering besotted fool, Al,” Jeoffrey said wryly. “Never thought I would see the day.”
A snort escaped Alastar’s nose. Those words coming from either of these men in front of him were ironic. “Says the man who cannot be away from his wee wife for more than an hour without checking in on her. And you, Eoin, who does the same.”
“My wife is with child!” Jeoffrey said incredulously.
“And I have a wee babe!” Eoin added defensively. “What’s your excuse?”
Alastar smirked at his mates. Eoin wanted to know what his excuse was? Why he was so besotted with Aislin? Alastar wanted this conversation to end and knew just what to say to make that happen. “Well, your sister has a shapely arse, firm thighs, high perky br–”
“By the gods, Al! I did not need to know that.”
“You asked why I am so besotted,” he smirked triumphantly. In truth, it was so much more. Her smile, though rare, was enough to light up the sky and shine like the stars above. What everyone else saw as a temper, he saw as a passion to live her life the way she saw fit. Her determination humbled him. Her fierce love for her family made him long to be a part of it. She made him want to be a better man. That thought made his heart skitter. He had not thought on that until this moment. That explained his humiliation over being caught with Janice. It was because he wanted to be a better man… for Aislin. He wanted her to look at him and see a man worthy of her love, not a fickle man, as she had called him, who would accept any lass into his bed if he was in the mood. That was who he used to be… not anymore.
“Al. What happened? I do not understand why my sister is so distant. Did she find out about the wager? Which, by the way, I have refrained from killing you over only because I can see you truly care for her.” Alastar flinched just thinking about that foolish wager. He still had not even broken it off with Àdhamh. It had nothing to do with his ego and everything to do with his foolish hope that he could still make her care for him.
With a sigh, Alastar wiped his sweaty chest down one more time before bending over to retrieve his tunic. “When she found me in the gathering hall, I had Janice on my lap.”
Jeoffrey’s eyes narrowed. “Is that all?”
He shook his head. “Nay. Janice had spilled ale all down her breasts and—”
“And you did what you always do. Buried your face into her bosom.”
Alastar threw his hands up in exasperation. “I had a large set of breasts in my face… dripping with ale! I used my tongue to clean them up,” he shrugged. “Any man would do the same. Tell me I am wrong,” he said with a quirked brow.
“So, you were caught being a typical man in front of my innocent sister,” Eoin laughed. His laughter grew in intensity until he was bent over wiping tears from his eyes. “Now I understand why she is so cross!”
“She made it clear she has nay interest in me earlier that day! I have not been with a lass since arriving home to Ériu. Was I wrong to finally accept the attentions of a lass who actually wanted me?” Alastar asked incredulously.
Eoin snorted one last time and wiped his eyes again. “Nay. You just have bad fortune.”
“Terrible timing,” Jeoffrey added with a nod and a chuckle.
“Aye. And now she finds me disgusting. Told me I am a fickle man, like all the others. And we have not spoken in four days.”
“I will speak with her,” Eoin nodded.
“Nay, do not! Do you not understand your sister at all? She wants to be treated as a woman, Eoin. She does not like you and your family always telling her what to do, where to go, how to feel. You cannot force her to see reason. I will handle this situation. On my own,” he emphasized.
“Whatever you say, mate. It is not as though she will listen to anything I have to say, anyway. I’m off.”
“To check on your wife and daughter?” Alastar said with a laugh as Eoin scowled and blushed slightly.
“Aye, and mayhap if the babe is sleeping, I can make love to my wife,” Eoin waggled his brows.
Watching his friend closely, Alastar looked at Jeoffrey and winked before deciding to goad Eoin into a deeper blush. “Och, I still remember when I stood witness to the wedding of Jeoffrey and your wife.”
“You are an arse, Al,” Eoin said with a scowl, then shot a stern look at Jeoffrey as he strode off toward his house.
Alastar laughed but Jeoffrey whapped him upside the head. “Why did you go and say that, Alastar? The man was just starting to like me!”
“Mayhap I needed you both to stop focusing on me and focus on your own issues,” he said with a grunt. “That is what you get for stealing the man’s bride last year, and that’s what he gets for trying to intervene on my business with his sister.”
Jeoffrey smirked and shook his head. “Fair enough. Now I am off, and aye… it is to check on Clarice,” he winked and strode off, leaving Alastar all alone, once again. He would show Aislin he was a man worthy of her trust. He was not certain how, but he knew ignoring her was not the way to achieve his goal.