Leilani

 

Considering I slept all day Saturday, almost, I am surprised I didn’t miss all of Sunday.

It’s 9am when my eyes open for the first time. I made the decision last night to go to my parents today and tell them everything. There is no point in trying to deal with this on my own. I don’t know anyone with a spare £2m that I can borrow until I sort my accounts out. I mean, yes, I earn amazing money but once we cover our overheads there is little disposable income. My bank account is healthy and there is nothing stopping doing most things that I want but I sure as hell don’t have £2m laying around. I could raise it but not in his timeframe.

 

I must dose off again, as my phone wakes me up.

Ethan

“Hey E Number”

“How you doing sissy?”

“Awesome now you’ve woken me up! What’s the deal?”

“Just checking in. You coming to dinner today?”

“Yah, I am. Need to have a word with the parents and I found some balls over night so need to strike whilst the iron is hot and all that”

Ethan laughs

“Coolio, I will swing by yours and pick you up, say 12.30?”

I look at the time, 11.00.

“It’s a plan, batman” I reply and hang up my phone.

 

I jump in the shower before I make a coffee, not much time to get ready today.

I pull out a pair of leather leggings and an off the shoulder oversize t shirt. Perfect for this not quite summer yet weather.

Dressed, Hair in a low ponytail – Kim K eat your heart out. (Someone in a tabloid once said I was like a blue-eyed Kim Kardashian. I guess there are similarities,  not many though. Kanye however, wouldn’t make the cut. Sorry bubs.) I decide to check out the papers for a bit, make sure all my clients are behaving.

Lots of speculation about Malachi, especially as he has not been seen at the England training camp. There are also some whispers about Johan moving abroad. The trolls are out in force. Anfield Town has declined to comment on either. Roll on tomorrow when the speculation will be put to bed.

I idly flick through some of the gossip pages. Dickhead Dom has got his work cut out. The drunken pictures dominating the pages are all of his clients. I laugh and feel some satisfaction that he is the lowest of the low.

I couldn’t tell you what I saw first, if it was the headline or his picture.

Guy. Breaking up with his almost fiancée in public. His almost fiancée being Millicent O’Sullivan

I can’t believe a word of this. I read through the article. Lots of rubbish really, all speculative with no basis. He was so adamant when I confronted him before about her. I don’t think he would lie to me, but then he doesn’t owe me anything much less the truth. But my heart lurches when I remember her saying they were almost family and the fact they were having dinner with both their parents. Would I have so calmly let my boyfriend leave with another woman like she did on Friday? No. But she isn’t me. I also can’t ignore the fact that he was at the gym with her so early on a Saturday morning.

Because it refers to her Instagram, I have to go and have a look. Pictures don’t lie do they?

I feel sick when I open it up. He is all over her page. Tagged in pictures (I didn’t even know he had an Instagram) I go into his page, and there she is. Millicent. Pictures of her in a bed, at his parents, not many of them together but they’ve both got the same picture up from his birthday. There is no denying she was on holiday with him. I look at the dates. There is one with a philosophical quote from Thursday night, saying something about being stronger than the lies.  Then she post another one on Friday morning about waking up alone one too many times. He woke up with me on Friday. Son of a bitch.

It explains so much, him coming to me more than I went to his. She probably kept his bed warm whilst he was hopping into mine.. I climbed back into bed after my Instagram stalking. Fully dressed and put Netflix on. I decide to catch up on Queen of the South. It’s not our show anymore.  My intercom has buzzed for a second time. I ignore it again, I don’t want to see anyone right now.Ethan starts ringing my phone.  My voice is thick with emotion so he believes me when I say

“Sorry E, I have been hugging the loo for the last hour, going to give dinner a miss”

Ethan doesn’t argue. He doesn’t do illness. “No worries Sissy will let the parental unit’s know, Madre is likely to pack me up with leftovers, shall I swing them by later?”

“No, not feeling up to it. Will catch up with you in the week”

I switch my phone off after the call. I don’t want to become obsessive over it all. I need to draw a line under Guy, I can be professional when needs be, but that’s it. I am done.

I run through a million scenarios in my head, did I miss anything, were there any clues that I was the other woman.

It was my decision to not do sleepovers and he went with it, no arguing, no questions asked. Was that to keep me happy or to stop any digging. How did I end up like this?

Rayne is buying a house with a boy. Ethan is trying to be a grown up, he handled Friday like a pro. Alex is going from strength to strength and I am sure mum said Christopher had just started seeing someone. Elliott is always going to be single. He is the most intense person I know, oh well, he can be my plus one going forward, then can’t he?

I think back to Trent’s party. Millicent was there too. I remember now.

Guy was drunk when I arrived. Ma Rose asked me to keep an eye on him. She said Rayne was doing it, but she’s disappeared. Guy was like that embarrassing uncle, he had no coordination and was throwing himself around in an attempt to dance. The band aptly started to my play tracks of my tears, couldn’t let this clown ruin the party.

Because it was a family affair, I had chosen my outfit wisely. My cobalt blue body con dress was specifically purchased because I look awesome in blue. True story.

It was high at the front to keep the puppies contained but swept low at the back, fitting snuggly across my hips, stopping just above my knee. Having just got back from our annual trip to Dubai, Rayne and I go every year to celebrate the end of my birthday month, I am still tanned and my blue and gold Zanotti heels look fire.

“Mr. PM you owe me a dance”

He stopped flailing and pulled me into him”

I owe you” he breathed.

I didn’t think he was sober enough for a conversation.

“Owe me for what?”

“Saving me. I feel rough. I’ve just had to take an anti-histamine and I reckon Millie slipped me a horse pill”

He laughed really loudly, abnormally loud. Not his usual self loud. We have only met a handful of times. A few social events and that’s about it but he’s always been quiet, observant.

I made a quip about him being socially awkward or something once and Trent put me straight instantly. He said

“I guarantee you that man can relay every conversation, every movement and every drink you’ve had. His brain works in such a way that I bet he could then convince you that you’ve spoken to, moved or drunk something completely different. Awkward he is not. He’s observant”

I look back to the man in front of me.

He is suddenly in my space, one arm around my waist, the other across my back. I lean my head on his shoulder and almost pull back. Jesus he’s built like Arnie under this shirt. Solid muscle is now my pillow. Clearly sensing my surprise, he flexes his arms around me and my god I’m a lemon. One squeeze and he’s literally juicing me. I shift my legs apart mainly to ease the friction but that inadvertently makes Guy shift, so his groin is flush against me.  My arms can’t reach all the way around his back.

His thumb is gently stroking my back, as he leads me around the makeshift dance floor. He feels safe and strong. He smells like absolute heaven and I forget where we are for a second. I follow him in his steps, the music is secondary, the people in attendance not on my radar. It’s only me and Guy.  I don’t even notice the change in the music. Suddenly Motown is out the window and Gypsy Kings prevail. Guy groans heavily punctuating it with a deep sigh. He rolls me out away from him. It takes me a second to work out what is going on. Guy spins me out from him again and I stumble. Quick as a flash he pulls me back.

My eyes must look wild – we’re moving to the music but with a good foot between us.

He steps forward, I step back, he moves to the left I move to the right, he raises a hand and I spin under his arm. We both step out and then back into hold. In my head we look like we should be on strictly come dancing. He rocks his hip against me and I now know for a fact he is as turned on as me.

What the fuck? I must have had one too many champagnes because this is feeling good. We swing round the floor and suddenly I am against a wall.

Guy kisses me, his lips surprisingly soft, his hold firm. It’s an innocent kiss, no tongues clashing, just a kiss.

He pulls on my bottom lip, a gentle suction that gives me all kind of feels. I try and follow him, I want to take the kiss further. I have never been into kisses but that felt so good.

Guy rests his forehead against mine.

“Leilani, I am about 20 seconds away from dragging you out of here”

I lean up to get another kiss. He smiles against my mouth

“Unless you want me to screw you up against this wall, I suggest we stop right now otherwise our family and friends will get a show they didn’t have to pay for”

“I don’t know when you got sexy but fuck me Mr. PM.”

“With pleasure, you tell me when and I am there”

“After this.”

He looks at me in surprise

“Don’t play with me Leilani.”

“Not playing, no games. It’s your fault I am now wound tighter than a clock”

He leans forward, caging me between his arms, a hand either side of my head. He aimlessly plays with my hair.

“I am going to unwind, undress and unravel you, but I will warn you. I am addictive. One night with me and you’ll never want to let me go.”

“One night and I promise you, I will let you go”

I don’t know where my balls come from, but I always get what I want and right now I want him.

“Careful, if you break your word, how will I ever be able to trust you?”

“It’s lust not trust babe”

He pushes off the wall,

“It’s both”

I watch him head round the wall back to the party.

I remember feeling conflicted, part of me wanted to follow him and take him home. It must be the champagne. I grab another one from a tray as I head back to see if Rayne has finished with the tall drink of Hubba Hubba.

Ma Rose is waiting at the top of the steps for me

“Leilani my favourite girl, come and dance with me” She grabs my hand and leads me back to the dancefloor, she grabs Rayne on the way to the main stage. Ma Rose has always been like another mother to me. She is the life and soul of any party, especially her parties. Rayne and I got our social skills from Ma Rose. The woman knows how to keep 100’s of people happy whilst having a good time herself. She is the party queen. If she says it’s time to dance, we dance. We show everyone how to have fun and let your hair down. She has no inhibitions and I love her.

She spins us around and we do our own kitchen salsa in front of the entire crowd. I catch Guy’s eye mid twirl. It’s like he’s undressing me with his eyes. I need to get out of here and fast.

Rayne slowly fills her boots with champagne, she is attached to me and I have no way of leaving without letting her know where I am going.

“My daughter is a few sheets to the wind, can you get her up to her old room please Leilani, I have to see some people out. You are welcome to stay here too”

“No Ma, it’s OK, I’ve got an early start”

I get Rayne upstairs with the Ethan’s help. I don’t even bother to get her changed, I whip her under the duvet and I am out of there in record time.

“Want a lift home Sissy?”  Ethan is jumping in a cab

“Please”

I look up Guy on Facebook as we head through the back streets of London and send him a message. His profile is almost dormant, so I don’t know if he will get it. Seconds later I get a response

“Oh Facebook, how very retro! Don’t tell me your latest hook up is an old flame that was at the party?”

“Not even close Ethan. I am just being social”

“Nobody is social on Facebook any more you weirdo.”

“I use mine for work too you know!”

“Oh so you’re working now? At this time on a Sunday?”

“Yes. Now shut up and leave me to it”

He drops me home and Guy is at my door straight after.

“That was fast! What did you do, fly here?”

“Not quite” he answers. Without pausing for thoughts I am up slammed up against my own door. Guy takes over in ways I didn’t expect. He leads the charge.  I’ll be honest, I don’t actually remember what happened next. Not in detail. The only thing I knew for sure was that I was so wrong when I said I could let him go. I was hooked.

Facing him the next day in Rayne’s office, I thought I would be fine. I’ve done it before, had a one-night stand with someone I shouldn’t. had to face them again, and every time, it’s been easy. They always want more, but me? I get what I can then leave them to it.

Guy Pearce Morgan proved me very wrong. The second he looked at me, it was like a flashback. He leans in to kiss me hello and I blush. I know where that mouth was not 13 hours ago, and body remember too because she betrays me. She softens where she should be hard and hardens where she should be soft. My legs don’t work so I can’t stand, my brain cannot compute how to do anything, my nipples have turned to rock, you could hang your coat on them right now. I watch him work and see him in a different light. He’s sexier today than he has ever been. And that is a problem. He agrees that we have to go to Liverpool and he throws out commands. I do what I never do I obey.

 

There is no way he could have been with Millicent then. She was at the party, but she left soon after I arrived. The pictures of them together at the party are candid shots not posed shots. He is holding onto her in one, but I remember he was a bit like Bambi that night.

Overthinking is better than any sleeping tablet, Monday morning comes around and I am on autopilot getting ready for work.

I switch my phone back on – 4 voicemails

Rayne:  Hey, need to run something by you call me when you get this

Rayne is only ever formal when it is work related. I make a note in my diary to call her when I get to the office

Martin: Hope you’re not avoiding me Leilani. The pictures and videos will be going out there this week. It’s not an idle threat. You owe me the money and I will do whatever I have to, to get it back

Nice. Love that kind of a message

Elliot: Missed you at dinner, just seeing if you are feeling any better. Love you

Make another note to call him when after I have called Rayne. I need his help with Martin and I am running out of time

Dad: Leilani – call me when you are up and about, it’s not like you to get wiped out. Your mum thinks grandchildren are on the way. If you are pregnant, please come and talk to us. It’s ok, we will be there for you.

My Parents are pretty damn amazing. Let’s just hope they remain that way when they hear about the videos and some of the other things I have done

 

I make my way to the office and get hold up in meetings for the best part of the day. I had the contracts sent over to Miami for Johan’s transfer. He has been kicking back in my office since 10am with his wife. We’ve looked at some houses online that I think they liked. I arranged flights for us to go and check some of them out. Relocating a family is always tricky but this one is more complex. I have schools to get reports on, cars to organise.  I have another client who might rent their current house from them, which is one less thing to worry about. Coordinating this will be a nightmare but it’s what I do and I love it really.  We got the deal agreed at 3pm and it’s all over sky sports news which is on in my office. You’d think I work in the stock exchange the amount of screens we have but deadline day is huge for us, Sky sometimes gets the heads up before I do. My veins pump as I think about what this deadline day will mean for us this year. We were big players in January so August can’t come soon enough.

I try Rayne when Johan finally leaves. She’s on her voicemail. I leave her a quick message asking for her to come around this evening.

My next call.

“Hi Dad”

“Leilani. How you feeling today?”

“Better thanks, and for your information, I am not pregnant, not even close, so Mum doesn’t need to take up knitting just yet”

He chuckles, and I remember where I get my laugh from

“I think you had better have that conversation with her, when are you coming over this week? It’s not the same without you”

“Maybe I will pop in after work?”

“I won’t be in until late, I have a surgery due in at 4pm”

Damn it, I need Dad to be there

“I can come over tomorrow evening if that’s ok?”

“Ah, I have a medical board meeting tomorrow, come Wednesday”

Wednesday. It will all be too late on Wednesday.

“Ok” I say barely holding back the tears. “I will see you then.”

I rest my head on my desk. Wednesday.

I text Martin. I tell him he will have his money on Thursday. Dad will give it to me I know he will. All I have to do is ask right?

My clients this afternoon cheer my mood up. I have a Spanish League 1 player, 17 been offered deals from the EPL and is ready to take a step up, only he needs me to hold his hand. I love clients like this, when you get them so young and you take care of them they stay loyal. Loyalty is a massive thing in this game, It’s the reason you are either successful or you are not.

My receptionist buzzes me to tell me that I have had some packages delivered. I love packages, usually it means contracts.  My stomach falls thinking about contracts. If they are legal documents, that means Guy as our legal ‘department’ will also have copies, meaning I will have to speak to him. I don’t have to be nice, I just have to speak to him.

I ask her to bring them in. Honestly, I need a PA like Raynes, Paige is a dream, she knows everything, does everything and is everything. We need to clone her asap.

 

I start to open some of the letters.

Two new client briefs that I requested. A female golfer who is chomping at the bit to have me sign her.  She’s Britain’s answer to Lexi Thompson.  I don’t know much about golf, I have played a few times at charity events, so I need to swat up before we meet. I email to set up a date for next Monday. A week is plenty of time to see what I can do for her.  I will ask Rayne to attend as I know full well that female golfers are few and far between, we need to get her out there in the mainstream spotlight. The more attention she garners the bigger the deals I can attract. I email Rayne and Paige, checking the diary for next Monday and also seeing what events are coming up. I will ask Rayne to run through them with her. If she bites and she is willing to work my way then we can have a deal, if she isn’t then she can find some stuffy old man to handle her. I don’t do gimmicks, but I will get my clients noticed for the right reasons. I won’t send them to the opening of an envelope, but I would send her to a children’s movie premiere for example. Lots of families and kids around, we need to build a whole profile for her, a fan base that can grow.

 

One of the packages is an actual parcel. It’s addressed to me directly and not to the office.

Given the issues with Martin, I am a little cautious.

I open the box and find a jewellery box inside. Pulling it open there is a beautiful gold chain with a gold coin hanging from it. In the centre of the coin is a single diamond solitaire. My birthstone.

The has my initials L.C.B on the front not many people know C is my middle initial and not G. The G in my company name stands for Goddamn as in Leilani goddamn Barros has done it again.

A peace offering.

Sorry

Guy

I throw the chain back in the box and slam it in my drawer. A peace offering? There is no peace to be offered. You screwed up. Now you’ve been found out, you want to buy my friendship?  No chance.

 

Whatever made him think that would be a good idea. Call me buddy. Let’s have a conversation you know.

My 3pm is here and there is no time to dwell, I head down to the boardroom – this is an existing client, so a housekeeping visit.

I stroll into the room, smile wide, eyes bright. The sooner this is over the better for us all.

Martin is sitting in the chair next to my client.

“Good Afternoon Miss Barros, I hope you don’t mind me joining this meeting. Only Claude is a great friend of mine and I am now his business associate. He asked me to come.”

I look at Claude. A low-level racing driver, with formula one taste. He looks perfectly relaxed, so I take my seat.

“Not a problem for me”

I pull up his file on my iPad. “Shall we go over your existing terms Claude and then we can look at a new contract.”

I reel off the terms he has with his current team. He wants to go up to F3 and become an F1 test driver, so his contract needs to allow for this. Open clauses are notoriously difficult. Teams want loyalty, they want you to earn every shiny dollar they pay you.

“Claude, you need to understand that this is not straight forward, the larger teams are going to want long term commitment, they won’t offer you the money you have stated for a short-term relationship, can’t you see that?”

“Pardon me for interrupting but shouldn’t there be a solicitor here to add these terms in a more concise fashion? All I see is a young, albeit smart girl sitting here playing legal dress up. What are the ramifications if he signs long term and leaves?”

I stumble over my words. That is not an option. We all get paid as a buy in. If he goes short term so does my contract. I could lose him as a client and worse, 19.5% of the signing fee.

“Claude?” I ask him hoping he will tell Martin to shut up and go play with the traffic.

“I agree Leilani. I need to be earning big money and soon. I can’t play around, this is short career at best and being tied up for years is not an option”

“Understand. Well let me have a look.”

“No, Leilani, the main reason for coming here was to see if we had any hope of getting something agreed, it looks like that is not an option and as my existing contract is now on notice so are you.”

I have never been fired by a client. EVER.

“Who, may I ask is going to represent you?”

I direct the question at Martin, I know he has something to do with this.

“Oh, Leilani, there is something I failed to mention at the beginning. Your old pal Dominic was looking for an investor and I agreed to work with him, we will have our deal finalised on Wednesday SORRY I mean THURSDAY this week. Just cashing in some old stocks to get the capital”

“You fucking Cu...”  I fly out of my chair ready to launch at him.

He grabs my hand mid air

“Ah! No Leilani. That’s is not a very ladylike word and you are not currently acting like a lady. Although we all know your just a little slut deep down” He says the last part quietly so only I can hear. Claude is shocked by the little show and so I am.

I regain a small amount of composure, swallowing down the tears that are threatening to erupt.

“Claude. I wish you all the best. We will get your last royalties bound up and sent across, minus our fee of course.”

“See yourselves out safely now won’t you gents”

I don’t wait for a reply. I take one step for every three and almost run back to my office.

I can’t stop the tears now.

The hot tears are burning down my face. I can’t stop them. This office, this business is my life. If Dom starts to take my clients because he has the pulling power of Martin and now Claude, it will only be a matter of time before they all leave.

How was I so stupid? How did I get to this point?

If I tell my family, one of them if not more will single handily kill him and then everyones world will turn upside down.

I call Guy, I mean he is my legal man Friday, but I also want someone who knows my family.

“You’ve reached the voicemail of Guy Pearce Morgan, I am unable to get to the phone right now, please do leave me a message or if it is of an urgent manner, please call the office and press Option 2”

I hang up and try his office.

“Pearce Morgan, Jacobs and Kohn”

“Hi, can I speak to Guy please? It’s Leilani Barros from LGB Management”

“I’m sorry Guy is in a meeting for the remainder of the day, can I put you through to his voicemail or take a message at all?”

“No, that’s ok. I will try him again tomorrow”

I click the handset to disconnect the call. I need to speak to someone, Rayne still hasn’t called me back.

I dial the only other person I know who can help

“Trent Fitzgerald”

“Hey Trent, it’s Leilani, I have a bit of an issue and I need some help”

“Are you in any danger? What’s happened?”

“No Trent, no danger, I just need advice on a situation”

He sighs a deep sigh of relief.

“Over the phone or face to face”

“Face to face if you can?”

“Absolutely, come over here and we can talk, Rose is about to start dinner, won’t you please join us?”

Now, Ma Rose, is an amazing cook, she throws down plates like nobody else I know.

“Try and stop me. I am leaving shortly, see you soon”

I hang up on Trent, throw my things into my handbag and grab the one file that hasn’t seen the light of day on years.

On my way to the house that was as much my childhood home as my parents, I know for a fact that I have to tell Trent the whole truth. As embarrassing as it will be, he needs to know it’s the only way I can get out of this mess.

“Leilani, come in” Trent sees me into the house and through to his office. Ma Rose pops her head in to say hello.

You’d be forgiven for thinking that Rose Fitzgerald, nee Sinclair was your typical housewife. She’s far from it. Dressed in a pair of beige cropped trousers, a crisp white shirt, open at the neck exposing her string of beads she looks ready for a luncheon. She’s seriously petite, I don’t think she reaches 5ft, her hair is an auburn shock of curls, not as crazy as Raynes but you see where she gets it from.

“Drink Leilani?” Ma asks

“Please” I smile but it’s hard. The nerves have kicked in.

Trent sits on the small armchair adjacent to the sofa I’m on.

“Tell me what’s wrong Leilani”

I take a deep breath and expel the air.

“I always knew Sports Management was what I wanted to do, it was something that I grew to love as I got older and after University, I knew that it was exactly what I was going to do. It wasn’t easy finding work experience, nobody wanted to hire me even for free. I was working on the desk at dads medical centre and I wanted out. Martin was Alex’s best friend, with his parents overseas he had lived with us through most of high school. His house was being renovated and he was back staying with us, we got closer, a relationship developed, and I thought I was in love with him. He gave me such encouragement and suggested that if I couldn’t get into a company, I should just take one over. We scoured business after business until we found Scots. He set up all the meetings and off we went. They were receptive to the idea, not having their own legal department meant they were falling behind the other agencies, which you know because I asked you to keep us on retainer”

Trent supportively nods, both acknowledging that he remembers and asking me to go on, all  at the same time

Ma Rose comes back in the room with a tray. A decanter of whisky and a jug of water

“Now, both will quench your thirst but only one will ease the pain.”  She holds up the whisky and I nod.

The burn of the alcohol helped the lump in my throat subside.

“Stay please Ma” She sit’s next to me on the sofa, accompanied by her own drink

“Anyway, Scots told me they wanted a buy in of £5m, we got it down to £3m with some attachments and they agreed. Martin had moved back to his house and things were weird with him and Alex. I didn’t want to tell my family that Martin had been helping me because I thought they would talk me out of it. I asked Dad for his help and he said he couldn’t. They had all their money tied up and he didn’t want to raise funds against their property in case I got bored. He thought I was a little school girl. I was so mad, I went to Martin’s his friend Dominic was there, Dom worked for a talent agency and said he would show me the ropes. Looking back I was so stupid. We started drinking and Dom offered me a pick me up, I said I wasn’t about to snort anything up my nose and he handed me a small pill. I remember feeling free, and in control after taking it. Dom went home shortly after, leaving me and Martin. We went to his room and Martin made me strip for him, I say made, he asked me. Whatever I had taken made me feel good. I did as he asked, I mean he had seen me naked already. We then made love – huh. I was so naïve. Instead of falling asleep after he grabbed his laptop. He had recorded us; his room was fitted entirely with cameras. He said he had a friend who would pay good money for the video. I didn’t think anything of it, you couldn’t see my face and it wasn’t prostitution or proper porn because it was me and my boyfriend. A few days later, he asked me to meet him in a café and he handed me a cheque for £100,000. He said for another few videos with some specific things happening, we could make enough money for the takeover.

He had a contract drawn up and I signed it, as long as the images didn’t show my face”

I don’t finish my sentence because I am ashamed that I was so stupid. I thought he is going to film it anyway and at least if we make the money that’s all that matters. It was going to give us the start we needed. I got a kick out of it, knowing that people were going to be watching us, made me feel like I was in control.

I take sip of the whisky, it doesn’t burn through the lump this time. No this time it gets stuck, it mixes with the rise of bile and I choke on my own disgust. I spent years fighting against those who treated me like a piece of meat, I was the outspoken one. If someone had told me that they did what I did? I would laugh in the face of the fool. Serves you right.

The hot tears are now scalding my face, there is no let up. It’s a free for all.

Ma Rose takes my hand providing comfort.

“What would do if you were your client Leilani” It’s a strange question from Trent

“I did what I would do, called my public relations manager but she hasn’t called me back and I did call my lawyer, but he is tied up all day apparently” The sarcasm drips off my voice as I say that last part.

“Ah yes, I am partially responsible for Guy being tied up at the moment, I gave him some files to check. Has he not told you?”

“He hasn’t told me anything, why would he?” I say, slightly on the defensive.

“No real reason, I just thought he might” Trent seems uncomfortable, like he has said something he shouldn’t.

“To top it off that witch of a woman, setting him up like that” Trust Ma Rose, she is there to rescue a surprisingly bumbling Trent

“Well that probably hasn’t made his day any easier. I know Rayne asked me for help to get the stills from the Harbour Club. You can see it was a set up”

My blood runs cold for a second. If I hadn’t been so caught up in myself and let him stay on Friday, he wouldn’t have been at the gym on Saturday and this wouldn’t be happening. It’s my fault, I am the reason he is dealing with all of this. He even had time amongst all of that to send me a gift and I all I give  a shit about the “crap effort he put in my saying nothing at all on the poxy free gift  card.” This is sounding like a pity party and maybe it is, I don’t deserve anyone. It’s my own fault. They always told me I would be nothing more than a set of boobs. After my deadline passes that’s all I will have.

“Enough about that, finish filling me in” Trent interrupts my thoughts, probably not a bad thing

“The problem is, that contract I signed, means for the sake of my company all rights to the videos reman the property of Martin. His house. His cameras. His footage. He has other angles, now I am a public figure he can sell them to the highest bidder which will no doubt have them on some free access site, he wants £3m in cash by Wednesday otherwise he releases the footage”

I cry so hard. There is no slowing it down. I can’t imagine my parents faces when they see this, when they know what I have done. What my brothers will do. They will probably disown me, I would. The shame you have brought on your family, all for what? A company that you’re going to lose anyway because they will use this as leverage to take everything from me.

I can’t hear Trent over the ringing in my ears. I want to go to sleep. I want to sleep and never wake up again. I send up a silent prayer, asking God to take the me to him, take me away from this. I haven’t got the strength to do it myself.

Ma Rose is trying to calm me down, I think I must be hysterical, I have 2 days until the deadline but we all know that I am going to lose everything anyway. There is no point in going on. Ma takes me upstairs to Raynes old bedroom. She holds me for a while until I can only assume the tears put me to sleep.