CHAPTER SIX
“Thank God it's Friday,” Carmen said as we sat together for lunch.
“They've really been jacking up the homework lately,” Victor complained.
“I know. I probably won't have time to do anything else all weekend.” I frowned at my food.
We spent most of our lunch complaining about school and talking about our weekend plans. Carmen was going on a shopping spree with friends from high school, and Victor was going to help his dad work on an old car he had won at an auction. My life seemed boring by comparison. I would sit at home, do my homework, and ponder the mysteries of Dominick Parker's mind. Maybe if I was lucky, I'd get sexually harassed by him again. Who knew when Doctor Jekyll would turn into Mister Hyde, but I was almost certain I hadn't seen the last of him.
Lunch was winding down, and it was time to part ways and go to our afternoon classes. Victor's class was down the hall from mine, so he walked with me. I always enjoyed that brief time spent together without Carmen, though he rarely spoke. Today he seemed more on the talkative side, perhaps because the week was almost over. That tended to make everyone a bit more lively.
“So you're going to be busy with homework all weekend?” he asked, as if that fact hadn't already been established.
“It seems that way.”
“That's too bad.”
“Why is that? It's not like I have anything better to do.”
“No plans with Dominick?”
“We're not like that.” I gave him a serious look.
“Good, then he wouldn't mind if you went out to the movies with me.”
My heart froze in my chest. Was I hearing him right? Had he just asked me out on a date?
“The movies?” I stuttered.
“Yeah. I was thinking maybe we could go after school, that way Dominick wouldn't have to pick you up.”
“Yeah, that would be great,” I tried to contain the excitement in my voice.
“Awesome. I'll see you after school then.”
“Sure.”
He dropped me off at my class, and I waved to him awkwardly while he continued on his way. Then I ran to my seat to text Dominick and let him know he wouldn't have to pick me up, “Hey. You don't need to pick me up after school. I'm going to the movies with a friend. He'll drop me off afterward.”
When the class began, I couldn't concentrate. My mind was stuck on Victor, that charming smile of his, those sophisticated good looks. He seemed genuinely happy I had accepted his offer.
Maybe this would be my chance to get over Dominick. He and I really weren't anything. Were we? Lovers at best. But I deserved better than a lover. I deserved a boyfriend. If he wanted more, he should have shown me. He'd had plenty of chances. From what I could tell, I was just a booty call to him.
My concentration was at an all-time low for the rest of the day while I thought about this new twist in my life. Would Carmen get mad at me when she found out that Victor had asked me on a date? Probably. Would Victor and I have sex? It's not like I was a virgin anymore. Then again, my sister had once told me it was bad to jump into bed with a guy right away. Before sleeping with Dominick, I never would have considered it, but now I had certain dark cravings. And it wasn't like Victor was a stranger to me. We had known each other for a few weeks now. What would happen if he wanted to pursue a relationship? It might make living with Dominick kind of awkward. And I'd definitely have to put a stop to his strange behavior. Either that or move. Part of me liked the idea of moving, but part of me hated it. I had committed to living with Dominick, and it was saving my sister money on apartment rent. I would feel bad for calling her to change my living situation just because I met a boy.
The day was quickly coming to an end, and Dominick still hadn't responded to my text. During my last class, I sent him another one, but there was still no reply.
With a frown, I went out into the hall to meet Victor. He was leaning against the wall, looking cool. My heart fluttered at the sight of him. We would probably end up having sex, I decided. It would be nice to do it with someone my own age, just to see what it was like, someone who would likely have more consideration for me than Dominick.
“You ready?” he asked, pushing himself off the wall to flank my side.
“I need to go see if Dominick is outside first. I've been sending him text messages all afternoon, but he hasn't responded. The bum probably let his phone die.” I frowned.
“That doesn't sound like something a big important author would do.”
“It doesn't, but he's lazy. It really wouldn't surprise me.” I shrugged.
Sure enough, when we got out to the parking lot, there was the Maserati, front and center. A tremor of dread rolled through me as Victor and I walked towards it. I wanted him to stay behind, but I wasn't going to tell him that.
The convertible top was up on the car, so I had to open the door and bend to look inside. Dominick was all business as usual, wearing his dark sunglasses, not even turning to look at me.
“Did you get my text?” I asked.
“Yes, and my answer is no.”
I could feel my blood pressure spike at his words. “What do you mean your answer is no?”
“You can't get out tonight.”
“Why not?”
“Because you have homework.”
“How do you know? I haven't even told you if I have homework yet or not.”
“You always have homework. Get in the car.”
“No. It's a Friday night. I'm going out.”
Dominick unbuckled his seat belt and opened the car door. If I was stressing him out, you'd never be able to tell. Despite his words, he seemed perfectly poised and calm.
He climbed out of the car and came around to my side. My entire body tensed as he took my backpack and threw it on the floorboard, standing at the car door like a limo driver waiting for me to get inside. Heat climbed up my neck to my face, a mix of embarrassment and anger. Never before had he treated me like such a child. People were staring now, watching us.
Victor stepped up to intervene, holding his hand out politely. “Hello, Mister Parker, my name is Victor Stagnoli. It's a pleasure to meet you.”
Dominick looked down at the hand. “Likewise,” he grumbled, reaching to shake it.
“I promise I'll have Kim home at a reasonable time.”
“That won't be necessary because she's coming home with me.” He turned to me. “Get in the car, Kim.”
His voice was like ice, and I was beginning to feel it would probably be better if I did go with him. Dominick was causing a bit of a scene, and I just wanted it to be over.
“I'm sorry, Victor,” I said as I climbed into the car. “I'll see you on Monday, okay. We'll go out to the movies together some other time.”
Almost before I had a chance to finish my sentence, Dominick was slamming my door. He gave Victor a look of distaste before rounding the car and getting in. Victor stood there, dumbstruck, watching as we peeled out of the parking lot.
“What is wrong with you?” I practically shouted once I thought we were out of earshot of the school.
Now I could see Dominick unraveling, the muscles in his jaw tensing. “I told your sister that I'd take care of you.”
“Bullshit. I don't need you to take care of me. Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was?”
“It would have been less embarrassing if you had gotten into the car the first time I told you.”
“No. It would have been less embarrassing if you answered my text messages.”
“This conversation is over.”
I hid my face in my hands and screamed. He was impossible. How could he do this to me? Now I was definitely teetering towards the idea of calling Tammy and having her find an apartment for me. There was no way I could go an entire two years without being allowed to hang out with friends on the weekends. I might have been able to understand how he was acting if it was the middle of the week, but this just didn't make any sense.
When we got back to the condo, Dominick immediately retreated to his office, leaving me seething in the living room. I couldn't remember the last time I'd been so stressed. I was torn between calling Tammy and working things out with him. One thing was certain though, I couldn't continue to go on like this.
Taking a deep breath, I stormed into Dominick's office. He was already sitting in front of his computer, a manuscript open on the screen. As soon as I stepped through the door, he sighed.
“We're talking about this, whether you like it or not,” I insisted, crossing my arms.
“What's there to talk about?” there was more annoyance in his tone than stress.
The sunglasses were off, and I could see his expression clearly. He looked up at me, furrowing his brow.
“What you did was completely uncalled for. I won't stand for it,” I told him.
“You will do what I say while you're living under my roof.”
“Then I won't live under your roof anymore,” I practically spat at him before turning to leave.
In an instant, he was on his feet. He gripped my wrist and spun me around, pressing me back against the wall, towering over me. The look in his eyes had changed, somewhere between anger and lust.
“I don't think you want to leave,” he said, his voice low and husky.
My heartbeat sped up, and fear raced through me, though I knew I shouldn't be afraid. Dominick wasn't the same man he had before when we still lived in Virginia, but he wasn't a monster either. He would never hurt me, not physically anyway.
“Let me go,” I demanded.
His lips hoovered close to mine, his eyes turning hooded as he looked down on me. “Is that really what you want?”
I was sure he could feel my pulse through my wrist. Mister Hyde had come out to play, and things were about to get dangerous. The logical part of my brain screamed for me to get away from him. My body wasn't moving though. At least, not on the surface. A deep carnal part of me was stirring, the part of me that loved his rough hands upon me.
Don't let him do this to you. He's only using you. You know that if you let him do this, you'll crumble again.
I opened my mouth to speak, but my lips were quickly silenced by Dominick's. My hand pressed against his chest, weakly trying to push him away. It was the only pathetic resistance my body seemed to be willing to give. He grabbed my other wrist and joined it with the first to raise them above my head, pinning me against the wall.
By the time he pulled away from the kiss, his free hand was busy hiking up my skirt. I felt powerless and confused, afraid but impassioned. I couldn't tell if I wanted this or not. I looked at the man in front of me, trying to sort out my emotions. This was Dominick, the man that I had been in love with my entire life, but at the same time, it wasn't him. It was someone else. Someone cold and carnal and selfish.
“Dominick, stop,” my voice was small and timid.
His hand slid inside my panties, his fingers greedily parting my pussy lips. My body shuddered as his thumb rubbed across my clit. Then I felt the fullness of his index finger slipping inside of me, and my knees grew weak.
“I don't think you want me to stop,” he said. “You're wet for me already.”
He wasn't lying. I could feel the moistness between my thighs as his finger probed back and forth. My breathing was raged, my body now completely receptive. All I could do was stand there, a prisoner to his will.
A second finger joined the first, spreading me wider. Dominick engaged me in another kiss while his thumb went to work pressing and massaging my clit. I hated myself for wanting him, but I couldn't contain my own lust. A delicious throbbing pulsed around his fingers, my cunt preparing for the orgasm to come.
“Do you still want me to stop?” he asked, looking me over with confidence.
I was sure the answer was plain on my face. The anger was gone. All that was left was desire and the need to come. My body was so close. If he stopped now, I wasn't sure what I would do.
“Tell me to stop, and I'll never touch you again,” he said, and I feared that he meant it.
The thought of being denied was unbearable. I knew I should say the words, but all that would come out of my mouth was, “Kiss me.”
His lips moved to obey, his kiss soft and affectionate. It wasn't as desperate as the first one had been. In fact, I was almost certain I felt his body relaxing.
Up until that point, I hadn't reciprocated when he kissed me. I had been too angry. Now, my body was all systems go. My tongue explored the slick cavern of his mouth, drinking his minty breath. It was I who was being aggressive, sucking on his tongue, biting his bottom lip. His body was pressed against mine, and as he worked to bring me to climax, I could feel his erect manhood through his slacks. I wanted to touch it—wanted to return some of the pleasure he was giving me. I tried to pull my wrists free of him, but he wouldn't allow it, stilling completely as he gave me a very serious look.
“Don't move,” his tone was warning.
I simply nodded, fearing that the wave of orgasm was receding into my body. It didn't take long for him to draw it back out to the shore though. His fingers thrust into me at a rough intensity. He scissored them inside of me, causing me to groan. His thumb was all relentless persistence, quickly driving me up the hill of no return. I let me head fall to the side as I moaned shamelessly, lost in the moment, and Dominick bent forward to kiss and suck on my throat. It was all the extra stimulation that I needed to throw me over the edge. I fell hard, my contractions clamping around his fingers, my toes curling in my shoes as an outrageous amount of pleasure surged through me.
Dominick kissed me on the cheek as my orgasm began to ebb. Even after my orgasm was over, he held me in place. I waited there, exhausted and powerless with no motivation to escape. His fingers left my body, making me feel empty, making me yearn for something else to take their place. He brought them up in front of his face and inhaled, causing me to blush at the fact that he was smelling me. My juices glistened wet upon his skin. Then he licked up the length of his fingers and stuck them in his mouth, sucking my come from them. It was one of the hottest things I had ever seen, and my clit pulsed in agreement.
“I told you you didn't want me to stop,” he said once his fingers had been sucked clean.
In that moment, I took a sharp emotional turn. I had allowed him to seduce me again, and again, he was about to act like it was nothing; I could just feel it.
“I hate you,” I whispered, furrowing my brow at him.
He let go of my wrists, stepping away from me to return to his desk. “No, you don't.”
“You can't keep doing this to me.”
“I'm only doing what you want me to.”
“How can you possibly think this is what I wanted?”
Dominick looked up at me. “You wanted to get off, didn't you? That's why you were going to go out with that boy. I took care of that problem for you. Now go do your homework.”
“Dominick,” I began to yell, but he simply turned back to his computer and waved at me dismissively.
“I have to work now. Go study.”
“Ugh! I hate you,” I screamed as I stomped out of his office.
“No, you don't,” I heard him say again.
How could he be so hot one minute and so cold the next? I didn't understand it, but I knew I couldn't handle it anymore. I had told him that I loved him—that I loved the man he used to be, and he had taken my emotions and twisted them into something painful. My body still wanted him, but my heart knew it was time to jump ship.
With shaking hands, I picked up my cell phone and dialed Tammy's phone number. It took everything in me not to cry when I first heard her voice. The familiarity of it made me wish I could teleport home.
“What's wrong?” she asked, instantly picking up on the fact that I was upset.
“I want to come home.”
“Why? What happened?”
“Dominick's not the same guy he used to be.”
She sighed, “What's going on? Tell me what happened and I'll talk to him about it.”
“No.” I shook my head, sitting down on the side of my bed. “I don't want you to talk to him about it. I just want to leave.”
“Kim, I can't make this better if you won't tell me what happened.”
“He's just being such a control freak. He won't let me have anyone over, and he won't let me go out with my friends. I feel like a prisoner here.” In truth, that was only half of it, but how could I possibly tell her the rest.
“I was worried he'd be too overprotective of you.”
“Overprotective is an understatement. He treats me like he's my father.”
“You know Dom, he's always been like that.”
“Not like this. Not like this.”
“Well, you can't say I didn't warn you. I had a feeling this wasn't going to work, but you were so insistent on staying with him.”
“I wish I would have listened to you.”
“Big sis always knows best.”
I laughed shortly, “Yeah, I suppose so. So, what do we do now?”
“I'll give Dominick a call tomorrow and tell him I decided that I'd rather have you living in an apartment.”
“I'd rather you not. I don't want him to know I'm moving out.”
“Why not?”
“I don't want to hurt his feelings.”
“Well, Kim, he needs to know. You can't just disappear one day. Do you know how much that would freak him out?”
“Let me tell him, then. I'd rather it come from me than you.”
“If I tell him, he won't even know we talked.”
“I'd rather you let me tell him. I am a grown woman now, after all. This is my responsibility. I'm the one who wants to leave. I think I can handle this.”
“Alright,” she sighed. “Just don't wait until the last minute.”
“I won't,” I lied.
I had every intention of waiting until the last minute. In fact, I would wait until he was out of town. He could find out I had moved in a text message. That was the best way to go about doing this. That way, I wouldn't have to take the chance of him seducing me again. If he thought that everything was alright between us, then maybe he would back off. I couldn't handle the emotional push and pull of our warped sexual relationship anymore.
Tammy and I talked for almost an hour. She updated me on what was going on with her and Marcus, telling me that she wasn't pregnant yet, and that they were thinking about going to a fertility clinic if it didn't happen soon. Then she went on to talk about things going on at her work. She thought she was up for another promotion, though if she got it, they'd have to relocate to Pennsylvania.
“What would happen to our house?” I asked.
“We'd have to sell it.”
“Oh.”
It seemed like everything good I remembered from my childhood was being slowly ruined. Dominick wasn't the same man he used to be. Tammy wanted to have a baby and start her own family. Our home where we had made so many good memories might be sold before I finished college. Just thinking about it all made me want to cry.
“Don't worry though. I'll make sure you have your own bedroom in the new house if we do move,” Tammy said.
“Thanks, Sis,” I replied weakly.
The line was filled with awkward silence for a while. We had both said all there was to say. I knew she was too worried about me to end the call, and I honestly didn't want to let her go. It felt like everything was falling down around me.
“You said you read Behind Her Green Eyes, right?” I asked.
“Yeah. Why?”
“How did you feel about the characters? I mean, about the two main characters.”
“That's an odd question to ask.”
“I'm just curious is all. I just read it a little while ago. It was very intense . . . and familiar.”
“Familiar as in how?”
Was she really that oblivious? Tammy wasn't a stupid woman. Surely, she had picked up on the fact that the main heroine had been her.
“Never mind.”
She sighed, “Alright, I suppose it's time I confessed.”
My breath caught at her words. The change in her tone sounded bad, and I was scared I wouldn't like what she was about to say.
“Confess what?”
“Don't tell Dominick, but I never got past the first chapter.”
I gave the phone a queer look. “Why would you lie about something like that?”
“I didn't want to hurt Dom's feelings. I know he worked really hard on the book, and it was a huge seller, but I just couldn't get into it. The main guy was so sappy and in love that it was pathetic. I couldn't imagine reading five-hundred pages worth of him whining about this woman who never saw him as more than a friend.”
Her words stung. Didn't she have any consideration for Dominick's feelings? Had she not seen that the two main characters were her and him? It made me mad that she was still dismissive of his feelings after all these years. But then I wondered why I should give a crap. He was being completely dismissive of my feelings as well. It was a vicious cycle of pain.
“Oh. Well, I was just curious, is all,” I said again. “They wound up together in the end, the guy and girl.”
“That wouldn't have happened in real life. It was obvious from the first page that she wasn't into him like that.”
“I suppose.”
My heart sank even further. Her words were a reminder of what Dominick felt for me. He was a man, so he naturally wanted sex. But he would never love me. He wasn't into me like that. I was just an easy lay to him.
“I need to go,” I muttered. “I think my phone's battery is about to die.”
“Alright. Well, if you need to talk again, I'm always here for you. Don't hesitate to call.”
“I won't.”
“I love you, Kim. Try to keep your head up until I can find something for you. It might take a few days.”
“I'll try. I love you too.”
“Bye.”
I hung up the phone and laid on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. Why had I allowed myself to fall prey to Dominick's sexual advances again? Every single time, it ripped me apart.
The tears came unbidden, refusing to be denied their descent down my face. If Dominick heard me crying, would he come to me? Would he hold me and seduce me again? A deep part of me wanted it, but my heart was winning the argument this time.
I hid my face in my pillow to muffle the sounds of my sobs, crying to the point of exhaustion. It would all be over soon, and I would have my own apartment. I wouldn't have to deal with Dominick's emotional battery anymore.
In the days that followed, I decided to avoid Dominick. I still cooked his meals, but I ate in the kitchen before I served him, retreating to my room while he ate in the dining room alone. He didn't seem to notice or care, emotionless as usual. Instead of cleaning the condo around him, I waited for him to go to the gym every day.
Tammy called on Thursday to tell me she had found an apartment for me, but that they wouldn't be able to get me in for two more weeks. I groaned at the wait, but at least it was progress. I could hang on for two more weeks. What choice did I have?
The weekend came, and I spent it in my room on Skype chatting with Carmen and Victor and some friends from back home. I promised Victor that as soon as I moved we could go out together. He seemed fine with it and not the least bit offended by the way Dominick had acted, though I apologized to him profusely for it.
Monday rolled around, and Dominick went to the gym that night as usual. While I was cleaning his office, I noticed he had left his computer on. By that point, I was in I-don't-give-a-shit mode. I would be leaving soon, so who cared if he caught me rummaging through his stuff. Besides, Carmen was still nagging me to sneak and see what he had been writing, and this was probably the last chance I would get.
I turned off the vacuum and pulled out his chair, sliding in front of the computer and scrolling up to the top of the document. Dominick had only been gone for about ten minutes, so I knew I'd have around an hour to read.
Like with Behind Her Green Eyes, it was fairly easy for me to get engrossed in the story. It started with the heroine losing her parents and having to go live with a family friend. She was eighteen, but not up on her feet yet. The family friend was a rich guy who seemed rather cold at first. As the story began to unfold, it quickly became apparent that he had feelings for the girl, but he didn't know how to show them because he'd been damaged by a relationship in the past.
It felt like my heart was slowing down with each page that I read. The girl had curly brown hair and brown eyes. She tried to earn her keep by taking care of the wealthy man, and she seemed rather oblivious to the strange way he chose to show his affections. The girl . . . was me.
There were only forty-five pages to read, and when I reached the end of it, I felt absolutely paralyzed with thought. My mind was reeling. I couldn't believe what I had just finished reading. This wasn't a story at all. It was what had transpired these past weeks. Sure, some details had been changed, but the book was very much about us. And all the emotions Dominick had been feeling that he hadn't been showing were poured out on the pages. He did love me; he was just scared and confused. He had shut himself off from love ever since my sister, and he didn't know how to deal with it now. He didn't want to chance losing me by being the nice guy again. His sense of what women wanted had warped over the last five years.
“What are you doing?” his voice startled me.
I looked up at him. He had a towel draped over his shoulders, his forehead and chest glistening with sweat. Seeing him standing there after reading his book was like looking at him for the first time. He was absolutely delicious and desirable, and I wanted nothing more than for him to fuck me right there on the floor of his office.
“The girl in this book . . . is me?”
“What of it?” He gazed down on me with displeasure.
“I want to read the rest as you write it,” I told him.
He sighed, stepping towards me. “You can read it when I finish.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I need to read it while you write it.” Because it's the only way I'll ever understand what's going on inside your head.
Dominick came up behind me, leaning over the chair and wrapping his arms around me. They were surprisingly dry for as sweaty as he looked.
“Do you like it?” he asked.
“I love it.” I squeezed his arm gently.
“Good.” Dominick kissed me on top of the head. “I hoped you would.”
“Well, I suppose I should get back to work. These floors don't vacuum themselves.”
“No, they don't. I'll go take a shower and get out of your way.”
“You're not in my way. You're never in my way. But you could certainly use a shower.”
“Do I smell?”
I twisted around to give him a quick kiss on the lips. “Go shower, idjit.”
“Your wish is my command, Kimlet.” He straightened himself, looking at the computer with a sigh.
“It's just Kim.”
“Whatever you say.” Dominick mussed up my hair before leaving the room.
I grumbled internally. Would he always treat me like a child? Probably. The age difference between us was too great, and some habits seemed impossible to break. At least, his feelings for me weren't childish.
As soon as I heard the water turn on, I ran to my room. Vacuuming the office could wait. I needed to call Tammy.
She picked up on the third ring, sounding absolutely exhausted, “Hello.”
“Tammy.”
“Kim. Is everything okay?”
“Everything is great. Hey, listen, you didn't put a deposit down on that apartment yet, did you?”
“Yeah. Why?”
My heart sank a bit. “Is there any way you can cancel it?”
“I don't know. Did something happen?”
“Yeah. Dominick and I talked things out. I decided I don't want to move after all.”
Frustration filled her voice, “I suppose I can see if there's any way to get out of it. Nothing has been signed yet, so it should be okay.”
“Alright. Awesome. You work on that. I've got to go vacuum. I love you. Bye.” I hung up and ran back to the office.
There was a pep in my step as I finished my cleaning duties for the afternoon, thinking about what I had read. Dominick went back to his office when he finished his shower, and I reveled in the sound of his fingers tapping against the keyboard. Every word was for me.
Things were far from perfect, but at least I knew I had something to work with now. Dominick wasn't the heartless asshole I thought he had become, he was just psychologically traumatized from what had happened with my sister. Sex was the only way he knew how to express himself if not on paper.
Our relationship would be strange for a while, had been strange, but I was willing to work through our problems. Maybe someday I could teach Dominick that it was okay to love again. If I could do that, then I'd finally feel like I had been able to repay him for everything he had done for Tammy and I.