Trent
I’ve spent the last several hours sitting in the large black leather chair in my home office searching the internet for anything I can find about the dissolution of the partnership of Davis-Matthews Corp. Unfortunately, there are very few details other than the acknowledgement that there was a dissolution. There is no mention of any falling out. I’ve dialed Jonathan’s number multiple times with no answer. It always goes straight to voicemail. There hasn’t been a response to the numerous voicemails I’ve left. A call to my father’s personal assistant has left me no closer to finding out what’s going on.
I slam my fist on the desk utterly frustrated by the lack of information. I’ve tried my best to stay out of the family business my entire life. Even when Jonathan offered me a legal counsel position at Davis-Matthews, I declined. As much as I respect my family name and everything it represents, I’ve wanted to make my own way in the world. I’ve never even touched the trust fund that became available to me at the age of twenty-one. Last I looked, there was over fifty million dollars in it.
Fuck!
I hoist myself out of the chair and walk over to the bar to pour some Scotch. It’s not the fine bottle that I could definitely drink all the time. It’s a slightly better than average aged eighteen years. One large sip does the job of taking the edge off.
I stare into the crystal, shining brightly from the rays of light bouncing off of it. The amber glow of the liquid reminds me of Beth’s eyes. I think of her in my arms, gazing into my eyes. She is the best thing in my life right now, and even that is going to shit. She’s texted me so many times I’ve lost count. I haven’t been able to bring myself to let her know I can’t leave Parker. I’m guessing by my silence, she’s already figured that out.
I sit back down in my chair and stare at my cell phone hoping that some message will come across the screen cluing me in to what’s going on. Nothing. Just the little number next to my text message box letting me know I have sixteen unread messages. I already know they’re all from Beth.
I lean back and place my feet on the desk, taking another sip of the warm amber liquid. I consider what I should say to Beth. She may look and act like an adult, but nobody handles a break-up well. Am I really breaking up with her? Were we ever dating? I’ve never even slept with her. Heavy petting and kissing is as far as it has gone. Yet, my imagination has taken me so much further. I want to be her first. I want to make her feel how wonderful making love can be. I want to be the only person who can claim her entire body as mine. The hardness of my cock presses against my leg as I imagine myself with this beautiful woman.
My phone rings and a picture of my father pops up on the screen. My heart pounding, I desperately reach for the device, fearful I might not answer it in time.
“Dad, what’s going on? Why haven’t you returned my calls?”
“Where are you, son?”
“I’m in my office.”
“At home or the firm?”
“I’m at home, why?”
“There’s a burner phone in the top left drawer. I’ll call you back on that number. Take it and go into your backyard. I don’t want anyone overhearing this conversation.”
“Dad, what’s going on? Don’t you think you’re being a little parano—” The line goes dead.
I open the drawer to find the burner phone under some papers exactly where he said it would be. I’m puzzled by how it got there but know that anything is possible with him. Unfortunately, this doesn’t say a lot for the security system I have in place. I’m going to have to address that at some point.
I take the phone and follow his directions, heading out back. I go as far back as possible which isn’t far when you live in Boston. I pace the yard waiting for the phone to ring. There’s nothing like Jonathan keeping you in suspense to get the juices flowing.
Finally, it buzzes. Had I not known about this phone, I doubt I would have found it. “You have to tell me what’s going on. This is very strange, even for you.”
“Are you alone?”
“Of course I am. I’m exactly where you told me to be.” I huff in frustration, tired of this paranoid cat and mouse game.
“Good. Son, I have stay underground for a while. Some things have gone down and for your own protection, I need to disappear.”
“What in God’s name are you talking about?”
“It’s better if you don’t know. But I need to tell you this. You cannot trust any of the Matthews, and that includes your own wife. Watch your back. They’ll try to get to me through you. And for God sakes, protect those kids. Don’t let them out of your sight.”
“What the…?” The line goes dead again.
I end the call more frustrated than I was beforehand. It’s so odd. And now my dad is telling me to watch out for Parker? Are you kidding me? I don’t think the woman has one mean bone in her body. I swear to God I think he’s lost his mind.
I call my mom to see if she knows what’s going on with Jonathon. I’ve left her out of it until now because I didn’t want to unnecessarily worry her. But now, things seem to be getting out of control and I don’t know where else to look for answers.
I select Penelope’s name in the directory and it immediately dials. She answers on the second ring.
“Hello, son. It’s been a while since I’ve heard from you. How are my grandchildren?” Her voice is like a ray of sunshine. Always happy and upbeat.
“They’re good. Getting bigger every single day.”
“Oh, I miss them. I’m going to need to come visit before I head out on my holiday.”
“Holiday? Where are you going?” My mother rarely travels, and if she does it’s with my dad.
“Your dad is putting me on a cruise around the world. It’s going to be one-hundred and sixty-one days long. I’m going to see twenty-five countries. I’m very excited! I’ve never done anything like this before!”
“I guess with the dissolution of Davis-Matthews Corporation he can take some much needed time off.” My mind goes wild at the thought of Jonathon not working. He is very much a workaholic.
“Oh, dear. He’s not going. It’s just me and Aunt Lacy. It’s a girl’s trip. When he first told me about this, I thought he was crazy. I’m too old to be going on girls’ trips. The more I thought about it, the more excited I became. Lacy is over the moon!”
I don’t think I’ve ever heard my mom this excited about anything. “How long have you been planning this?”
“Oh goodness. You know your dad. He likes to be spontaneous. He only just told me about it a few days ago. I leave the day after tomorrow. Can you believe it?”
Angst fills my chest. There’s something very wrong going on and Penelope doesn’t have a clue what it is. “Mom, where is dad going to be? Why isn’t he going?”
“As usual he’s working on a new business project. He said he’s going to busy getting it off the ground over the next few months and doesn’t want me sitting at home. He’s going to meet me on some of the ports. When you’ve been married as long as we have, it’s okay to have some time apart. It’s what makes the marriage stronger sometimes.”
“Why did he pull out of the corporation? What happened there?”
“I don’t know. I try to stay out of your father’s business. I just know that he and Edward are quarreling. This too shall pass. This isn’t the first time they’ve had a disagreement. Listen, dear. How about I stop by tomorrow to see the kids? We can catch up before I leave the country.”
My mother is totally oblivious to my father’s shenanigans. I’ve always thought she was wiser than she let on, but now I’m questioning that.
“Sure, Mom. Will you be bringing Dad with you?”
There’s a silence on the other end.
“Mom?”
“Uh, no. Your dad is away on business. He’s going to meet me in San Francisco. That’s where the boat leaves from.” Her voice wavers slightly.
“Are you sure everything's all right?”
Penelope takes a minute before answering. “Why yes. Everything is perfect. I’m very excited for this trip. Oh! That’s the doorbell. I’ve got to go. I’ll see you tomorrow about eleven. How about we have some brunch? That sounds like a splendid idea. See you later!” She hangs up the phone, not allowing me to respond.
I put the phone down and take a sip of the scotch. Unfortunately the call with my mother did little to remedy my concern. If anything it only made it worse. I don't have a clue what's going on and I think that's just the way Jonathan wants it.
I pick my phone up and dial Beth’s number. I guess it’s time to talk to her. At least I’ll have the chance to fix one of my situations. She answers after the first ring.
“Where have you been? I’ve been texting. Is everything okay?” Her concern comes through loud and clear.
I don’t know how to explain to her what’s going on other than to come out with it. Beating around the bush isn’t one of my strong suits.
“Beth, listen. We can’t see each other anymore. There are some things going on with my family that I have to tend to.”
“I see.” Beth pauses. “She broke down and begged for you not to leave her, didn’t she?”
“It’s not important what Parker did or didn’t do. Believe me when I tell you that it’s bigger than you and me. There is something wrong with my parents and I have to focus on that for a while.”
“Do you love me?”
Her question catches me off guard. I think about it. What exactly are my feelings for her? They’re different than anything I’ve ever felt with anyone else. There’s a thrill and excitement every time I think about Beth. The touch of her hand sends jolts of electricity through my entire body, igniting every nerve ending into white hot fire. I’m alive when I’m with her.
“Yes, I do.” The words come out somberly, as though I’ve just lost something so important to me.
“Then I’ll hang on until you figure things out. No pressure, but I will be here waiting for you. Because I love you more than anything.”
How can someone so young be so sure of things? I’m about forty and I still haven’t figured things out. If anything, I’ve made a mess of my life. “I’ll give you a call in a few days. My mother is leaving the country. She’s coming over for brunch tomorrow. I need to spend some time with her.”
“Hmm. That’s interesting. Parker called to see if I could babysit tomorrow. She has a luncheon with some ladies in her woman’s group.”
“Really? This is the first I’ve heard of it. Don’t worry about coming over. My mom wants to spend the time with the boys and I’ll be here.”
Why would Parker plan something like that when she so desperately wants to work on our marriage? Doesn’t she know her social calendar is part of what got us into this situation?
“How about I come over anyway? I’d love to meet your mother. I promise to act like the nanny and not your girlfriend.”
Against my better judgement, I agree. I’m not sure what I was thinking other than I don’t know how I can go without seeing Beth for too long. She’s becoming the air I need to breathe. She’s uncomplicated and doesn’t expect anything from me. It’s refreshing.
I hang up the phone and lean back in my chair. I finish off the scotch. Just as I’m getting ready to pour myself another, a knock at the door disrupts me from the dirty fantasies I’m having of Beth.
The door swings open and Parker pokes her head in. “Can I come in?”
I nod. This is definitely going to require another refill.
“I thought we should talk.”
I remain silent. I don’t know what to say. I love my wife, but I no longer feel the way I used to. It’s almost as if we’re just acquaintances co-habiting under the same roof. There is no intimacy and certainly no sex. That’s been gone for months now.
“So I disgust you so much you can’t even look at me anymore?”
The hurt in her voice cuts me to the core. I take a step back from the bar and turn to look at her. A rogue tear escapes her eye. The pain in her eyes reminds me of a storm brewing over the ocean. There’s a lot going on in there. More than I can possibly imagine.
“I was just pouring a drink. I wasn’t trying to avoid looking at you.” I put the top back on the bottle and return to my seat.
“It’s the middle of the day. Why are you drinking?”
My father’s words flash through my mind. Don’t tell Parker. “It’s been a rough week. There’s a couple of big cases I’ve been working on, my marriage is going to shit, and my mother just announced she’s leaving the country for a few months. It seemed like a good idea.”
Parker wipes the tears from her eyes. “Where is your mom going?”
“A cruise around the world with her sister. Can you believe it? Oh by the way, she’s coming over here for brunch in the morning. Wants to see the boys before she leaves.” I wait to see if Parker is going to tell me about her luncheon.
I can’t quite read her expression although I can tell the wheels are turning in her head.
“When did she decide to do this?”
“I’m not sure,” I lie. “She just told me today. You know how my mom is.”
“I thought your mom hated traveling. It’s a little weird that she’s going without your dad.” Parker crosses her arms and leans against the desk.
“I don’t know. I guess it’s something her sister has always wanted to do.” The lies are easily rolling off my tongue now. Another sign of a great marriage.
“Well good for them.” Parker reaches down and takes a sip out of my glass, letting the liquid coat her palate before swallowing it down.
I’ve never seen her drink scotch before, and I have to say, I’m surprised. I eye her as she stares into the glass.
“We can’t get a divorce. We’ve been together a long time. Our families have been together a long time. The boys need us to be together. This would destroy them.”
I stare at the drawer holding the burner cell phone my father somehow secretly stashed. I nod. “I know it would be hard on them, but people get divorced all the time and kids get through it. They’re resilient.”
“To some extent they are. But it has an impact on them that lasts forever. We can’t do that to them.”
“Do you love me?” I ask her the same question Beth asked me only moments before. I had to think about my answer. I wonder how Parker will respond.
Parker looks at me like I have two heads. “Of course I do. I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t.”
I sigh. “I know you loved me when we got married, and I know you love me. But are you in love with me. For that matter, have you ever been in love with me?”
Parker puts her head down and avoids eye contact with me. “Yes, I am.”
“Really?” I stand up. “Because that sounds an awful like you’re trying to convince yourself of it.” I put my hands on her shoulders. “It’s okay to fall out of love. We’ve been together for years. Sometimes life just takes you in different directions. I think that’s what’s happened here.”
“No! I do love you. But I can see it in your eyes that you don’t feel the same. It hurts. What can I do to make you love me again?”
I’m exhausted. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster today and I’m not sure how to feel or what to do. “I will always love you. You’re the mother of my boys. I just don’t know that I can ever be in love with you again.”
“But there’s a chance?”
I take the glass from Parker and sip on the scotch. “I don’t know. I want to say yes, but I don’t know.”
“Trent, please. We have to try. Maybe we should go to counseling or something. I'm not ready to give up on us. We need to be able to tell our children we’ve done everything possible to make this marriage work. Six months. That’s all I’m asking to get our lives back on track. If we’re still not able to make it work after that, then we can walk away knowing we tried our best.”
I mull it over. Six months isn’t a lot to ask. Plus, Beth said that she’d wait for me. But if I’m just waiting for those six months to be up before I can be with the person I want to, then what is the point? I think about my boys and how everything will change for them. In that moment I know that I have to put them before myself or anyone else.
“Fine. Let’s make an appointment for counseling.” I down the rest of the scotch as the image of Beth waving goodbye flashes before my eyes. I close them, trying to remember her scent and the feel of her touch. When did I let this girl get under so far under my skin?
Parker places her arms around my neck and plants a soft kiss against my lips. For a moment I try to imagine it’s Beth. I try to shake Beth out of my head and I kiss Parker back. It’s been a while since we’ve kissed. Too long. I almost forgot what it was like.
She pulls back, smiling. “That wasn’t so bad was it?”
I don’t know if she’s trying to convince herself or me.
“What would you like me to make for brunch tomorrow?” she asks sweetly.
“You’re going to be here? I thought you had a prior engagement.” The words come out of my mouth before I realize the ramification of them.
“I did, but I’m going to cancel it. I think this is more important.”
I nod, surprised that Parker would change her plans. She has refused to cancel anything I’ve asked her to over the last few months.
“By the way, how did you know about it?”
I scramble for a second trying to find the right answer that would scream out I’m having an affair. “Beth called a little while ago to find out what time she should be here. I told her I’d have you call back. I forgot until right now.” Sounds like a plausible explanation-I hope.
“Yes, it was just with the Daughters of the American Revolution. It’s a monthly meeting so I can go next month. It’s no big deal.” Parker smiles and attempts to kiss me again.
I cut her off. “You’re not hosting it?”
“Amanda and I were co-hosts. I’ll just let her know I can’t make it. You’re not disappointed are you?”
“No, just a little shocked. I’m glad you’ll be here.”
Parker presses her lips to mine. I kiss her back. With Beth still fresh on my mind, I find my kiss to be almost forced. But I promised to try. I at least need to make the effort.
Parker pulls back but continues to embrace me. “What do you say the five of us go out to dinner? It’s been such a long time. We can go get pizza or something.”
“That sounds nice.”
“Great! I’ll go get freshened up and get the boys ready. Just give me a few minutes.” Parker seems almost giddy as she leaves the office. I’m not sure what I’ve signed up for, but I hope to God I don’t screw anything else up.