Drew’s eyes flew open, his breathing ragged like he’d run a damn marathon.
As he stared at the ceiling in early morning darkness, his stubborn side wanted to just stay angry. His temper got the best of him yesterday because the anger was so much easier to hold on to, to control.
But one question had him ready to hurl his alarm clock against the wall. It was so simple and had nothing to do with what happened between Luke and Anna. Although he still hated it.
Why hadn’t he been there that night? Of all nights in his life, why hadn’t he been the one who’d opened the door for her?
He would have called her his Sunshine, held her face in his hands, and told her he missed her. He would have leaned into her slowly, the way that drove her crazy, and kissed her the way he’d been dreaming of for years. He’d have done his damnedest to convince her, and maybe they’d have gotten all that time back they missed.
Drew pulled on a t-shirt from the drawer and the first pair of jeans he found. But when he got in his truck, he couldn’t start the engine.
He could get over this.
Right?
Not seeing she and Luke in the same room for a few…years might definitely help.
But, hell, they worked together every single damn day. There was nothing he could do about that. And for her to move back home, to start a life with Drew, they’d partner on the business and work side by side for the rest of their freaking lives.
Could he ever trust them again?
A more important question, the right question was…could he live without her?
And the answer was yes. He could, he had. But no part of him ever wanted to. Even the parts of him that were pissed as hell wanted to pull her into his arms and never let go.
Drew wanted to date her, marry her, and have babies with her, raise those babies in their home, and grow old with her. Whatever the future held, he wanted to face it with her by his side.
After an hour of convincing himself to put the truck in reverse, he drove in the direction of Anna’s parents’ house. Her car wasn’t in the driveway, so he grabbed his phone and dialed her number. The ringtone played back immediately from somewhere under the seat. She must have left it when they came home from the barbeque.
That night felt damn near perfect. Like everything was falling into place, that last puzzle piece fitting just right in the middle of his heart.
Drew fished her phone from the spot where it was wedged in the seat and hit send on the only other place he thought she'd go.
“Hello,” a confused voice answered.
“Layla, it’s Drew. Is Anna there?”
“If she was, there’s no chance I’d let you through this door to see her,” was her response as the phone disconnected.
Well at least he knew where she was.
It was a start.
The long drive gave him too much time to watch her empty spot beside him. He’d find a way to make this right between them. There simply wasn’t another option.
Ryan’s truck sat in the driveway as Drew turned the corner in their neighborhood. Two weeks ago, the four of them had barbequed in the back yard where Drew now parked on the street. He’d worried it would be awkward, the new guy in their group, but Layla and Ryan were nothing but welcoming and kind.
He sucked in a deep breath and walked up the sidewalk to knock.
Layla answered the door, hands firmly planted on her hips. “I thought I said I wasn’t letting you see her. You’re not the first one I’ve had to protect her from, and I’m not afraid to do it now.”
Drew hated being compared to Mason, but he wouldn’t challenge Layla. She blocked the door like a momma bear whose cubs were in danger.
Begging seemed his only option here. He rested his hand on the brick doorway, eyes pleading for sympathy she’d probably ignore. “Come on, Layla. I really need to see her.”
She opened the door a bit wider but still hadn’t extended an invitation inside. “Look, I know you have a right to be…upset about what happened.”
“Did everyone know about this except me?” He scrubbed a hand through his hair and down his face.
“I drove her there that night, stupid. Of course I know about it.”
“So why did you drive her that night? Why not take her home and let her pass out?”
“She’s my best friend, and she asked me to. But, honestly, I wanted her to either find out there was something still between the two of you or be completely over you. One way or the other.”
She wasn’t over him?
“What does that mean, Layla?”
“She’d been talking non-stop about you ever since I’d known her. After the break up, she couldn’t say your name for a while without crying, but you were always in the back of her mind. It’s like her stories or our conversations always ended up with you…no matter what we were talking about. I knew she always wondered what if, and I thought maybe she needed to chase it.”
Drew dropped a hand to Layla’s shoulder, ready to run past her if that’s what it took. “Okay, so now we’re living our what if. So can I please come in the house and talk to her?”
Layla glared, obviously still considering turning him away, as Ryan joined them in the entryway. “Let the man in, honey. He’s trying to make it right. Give him a chance.”
Drew shot her a questioning look. She rolled her eyes but motioned him inside. With a nod of approval, Ryan walked into the garage, leaving Drew with his very tiny but still very angry wife.
They moved toward the living room. Drew took a seat on what was probably the ugliest but most comfortable couch he’d ever seen.
“So where’s Anna?”
“Asleep. She was exhausted when she got here yesterday after being up all night thinking about how to tell you something she knew you’d hate. If you want to see her, you can be patient and let her rest.”
“I’ll wait.” He sighed, running his palms over his jeans. “Hate is an understatement to how I feel about it and how I reacted to her telling me, but I’m sure you already know that.”
“Yeah, probably couldn’t have handled it any worse.” She slapped him on the back, and he winced. “But she’s so happy with you. The way she looks at you, or when she even speaks your name, it’s just…I don’t even really know how to explain it, but that it’s with the awe of someone who’s still in love with the first boy she ever kissed.”
Drew swallowed back the lump in his throat. He knew that look, and damn did he love it. The piercing sparkles in those green eyes shone love like he’d never felt before.
Layla brought him a cup of coffee then joined her husband outside, leaving Drew to his thoughts.
What happened between Luke and Anna could never matter more than being with her, and the more he drilled it down in his mind, the more he realized what really made him angry was the circumstance itself. The pain she went through in her divorce she never should have experienced. He missed years of calling her his Sunshine, showing her how much he loved her. He missed being by her side as they graduated and started their careers. He missed being the first man to propose and watch her coming down the aisle toward him, taking her on her first honeymoon, and buying their dream house together. He missed out on so many moments over the years that they could have shared together, while she married him and he cheated on her.
Drew found the guest room down the hall and slowly peeked inside. The paisley curtains were pulled, the room dark. Her body curled in a little ball on the bed. He smiled at the peaceful expression on her beautiful face, gently covered her with a blanket, then took a seat on a chair in the corner.
His head rested against the soft fabric, eyes falling closed as he mulled over the words to repair the damage this latest storm had caused their relationship.
“Drew?” Anna sat up in bed, clutching the blanket to her chest like a bulletproof vest.
He’d drifted to sleep but blinked the grogginess quickly away. “Hi.”
“What are you doing here? How did you even know where I was?”
“I tried calling you, but your phone was in the truck.”
She stared down at her hands clasped in her lap. “Yeah, I wondered about that.”
“When you weren’t at your parents’ or Beth’s, I called Layla.” He leaned forward in the chair, elbows resting on his knees. “It was the only other place I thought you’d go.”
She gazed up from the bed, anger fighting with the hurt in her eyes. “Okay, so why are you here?”
“Because I need to talk to you. Because I…”
“We both know what you want, so let’s just do it, right now.” Anna stood to the side of the bed. It took Drew several seconds of watching her fling open her shirt buttons to realize what she meant.
“Anna, what are you doing?” he shouted, jumping from the chair.
“You said I would sleep with everyone else in the world except for you, so let’s…let’s get it over with.” She finished with the buttons, throwing the plaid shirt to the floor.
“That’s not exactly what I said.” Not the point, but coherent thought was impossible while she took off her clothes. Her black lace bra was on full display now while Drew tried to keep his gaze on her face instead of wondering if what was under her jeans matched. Pissed off and sassy Anna had always been hot as hell.
She tilted her head, a mock confused expression on her face. “So you didn’t say I’d sleep with everyone except for you?”
“Yes, but…”
“Well, okay then, let’s do this.” She reached down, unbuttoning her jeans, fingers on the zipper.
Drew leaped across the room, grabbing her hands. He stifled a groan when his fingers grazed her skin. That definitely wouldn’t help his case.
“Anna, stop,” he whispered.
Tears filled her lids, but she blinked them away. Stronger than she ever gave herself credit for. “Why, Drew? Sex is what you want, right? So I’m giving it to you, right now.”
“No, sweetheart.”
“Are you sure? Because maybe that’s all you ever really wanted. Maybe you only continued to think about me over the years because we never slept together.” A tear escaped, rolling down her cheek. “Sex is all that ever matters. It’s worth losing everything for, right?”
Did she actually believe that? Standing face to face, his hands on her bare stomach, he searched her eyes for a long moment. It was still there, the imprint Mason’s affair branded on her because he’d been willing to give up everything for a night with someone else. They would never escape him. His part in Anna’s life would always exist no matter how hard Drew tried to wish it away.
But also shining back at him through those green eyes was the look Layla mentioned earlier in the living room. The look from the first girl to ever steal his heart, the girl who’d had it all along.
He cupped her face in his hands. “Anna, you know that’s not true.”
“Do I?”
“I hate what happened, but I love you, and that’s all that matters.” His hands moved to her lower back and the silky skin there. He leaned his forehead against hers. “I just want to be with you. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
Drew’s eyes squeezed shut, trying his best not to stare down at her perfect cleavage. “Now can you please put your shirt back on so we can talk?”
He grabbed the shirt from the floor, placing it in her hands. She stared down at it, then across to the evidence of just how much she affected him. Another second of her eyes on him would break the weak hold he had on his self-control.
“What’s wrong?” Anna bit that damn lower lip, driving him over the top insane. “You just said you didn’t want to sleep with me?
“Well of course I want to. I am a man.” He smirked, causing her nervous laughter. “But I definitely don’t want the words ‘let’s just do this’ or ‘let’s get it over with’ to be what you say before it happens.”
She burst out in laughter, Drew’s whole body relaxing with the sound. A sound he hoped meant they’d weathered yet another storm scratched, but still whole.