Navy
Faye hums a familiar tune as she sets down her basket of gardening tools. I take in the massive garden, the biggest plot of land I’ve ever seen tilled into rows with luscious green plants growing in perfect lines. There’s not a weed in sight. The aroma of fresh soil permeates the air.
It was my favorite smell growing up. I’d dig in the garden for hours creating hills, holes, and little cities, eventually drowning it all out with a water hose. Then mud was my best friend until suppertime, and Mom would hose me off, fill my belly, and run me a hot bubble bath.
“Navy?” Faye’s hand comes down on my shoulder. “Sweetie, are you okay?”
“What happened?” I hear J.J.’s voice but can’t tear my stare from the garden.
“We walked up here, and she froze then dropped to her knees,” Faye offers.
I glance down to see I am on my knees. My body is numb from the old memories I’ve suppressed. I don’t even feel the cool grass through the fashionable tears exposing my knees. A large palm comes down on my shoulder. I don’t flinch. I’m paralyzed.
“Go ahead, Faye. I’ll sit with her.”
J.J. sinks down next to me, taking a seat on the grass. I don’t look toward him but feel the warmth of his body next to mine. I’m unable to look away from the rows and rows of plants and ripe vegetables ready to pick. It’s foreign, a feeling I haven’t had for so long.
Home.
Happy memories.
Feeling loved and safe.
It’s overwhelming. Wet stuff rolls down my cheeks when I watch Faye kneel by a tomato bush. If I squint hard enough, I’d believe it was my momma. She loved gathering enough fresh garden tomatoes for BLTs. They were my favorite. Anything garden tomato was my favorite. I’d eat them right off the plant.
“Faye.” J.J.’s large hand extends in front of me.
I watch as she winds back and tosses him a tomato. He catches it with ease. He places it in front of me.
“Toss me another,” he hollers at her.
She does, and once again he catches it with no problem at all. My thighs begin to shake, so I collapse back on my heels and finally look over to J.J. He’s in a white t-shirt, jogging pants, and is clean-shaven. He looks different without his cowboy hat. It’s almost as if he’s more approachable, human, just an ordinary guy. I know that’s not the case; he’s everything opposite of normal. The man is powerful, confident, and brutal.
Faye took a lot longer throwing together her batch of cookies. I had joined her in the kitchen and studied her and J.J., who had his nose in a book. He eventually stood up and left the room without a word.
He brings a ripe tomato to his lips, taking a large bite. I watch as he catches the juices with his tongue before they run down his chin. The action of him chewing holds my complete attention.
“My favorite.” He holds it out in front of him, admiring it like a rare gem. “You like?”
I nod and pick up the tomato in front of me. I roll it around in my hand for long moments while running the pads of my fingers over its meaty flesh.
“Momma always told me eating the tomatoes right out of the garden would give you a belly ache and make you sick.”
J.J. throws his head back in laughter. The muscles in his neck bob and flex. The man sure is something to look at.
“It wasn’t until years later I realized she was telling me that so I wouldn’t eat all the tomatoes before dinner.”
“My story is a little different than that, but this garden is my place of peace.”
I shuffle my legs out from underneath me and then cross them, all the while balancing the tomato in my palms. “It’s the biggest garden I’ve ever seen.”
“Yeah.” He takes another bite out of his tomato, nearly finishing the entire thing in two bites. “How are you doing, Navy?”
I toss the tomato up in the air and catch it, feeling comfortable with J.J. I’m not sure if it’s the beauty of the garden offering peace or the fact Faye is ten feet away. Probably a combination of both, because feeling comfortable with a man of his stature is a fatal move.
“Considering I had a nervous breakdown over the sight of this garden, then I’d say not all that well.”
He turns his gaze to me, giving me all his attention. The man is downright pretty in a handsome, rugged-as-hell way. I don’t know how to describe it. His eyes are haunting like they’ve seen so much more than they’ll ever tell. His lips have the perfect cupid bow. His biceps bulge and flex under his t-shirt. J.J. is determined, powerful, and raw. Those features creep back in, threatening to destroy the peaceful vibe in which I’m saturated.
“You look really good, Navy. Glad you’re eating.” His thigh relaxes into mine. I flinch, but he doesn’t seem to notice. “How are you getting along with Faye?”
My hand goes to my belly, and once I realize the obvious move, I try to play it down by gliding my hand to my thigh yet avoiding his. I should tell him. What if he makes me get rid of it?
“I love Faye,” I blurt out without a second thought. “Thank you, J.J. Thank you for everything.” I turn to him so we are full on face-to-face. What I’m about to say next could be the final nail in my coffin, but it would be hands and feet better than going back to Jordan, my personal fiery hell. “Please don’t give me back to him.”
It’s a brief glimpse, but I see it. His jaw ticks, and those espresso-colored eyes turn dark and angry. He relaxes his fist planted in the grass before speaking. “You will never see him again, Navy. I promise.”
“How? One month, right? And he is coming for me.” The peace and tranquility evaporate from my pores, and I’m left a trembling mess with thoughts of Jordan coming to collect me.
“Navy, do you like it here?” he asks, the fiery anger burning his eyes now long gone and replaced with compassion.
I manage to nod but can’t stop the tears from spilling over. My body continues to tremble out of control. “I can’t go back, J.J., I can’t. He did awful, horrible things to me, and he’ll kill the…”
The last word dies off in my throat. I can’t trust J.J. so damn easy just because he’s taken me in. He could be building me back up only to knock me down, and I refuse to allow any harm to come to this baby.
“Hey now.” He raises one of his large palms, and I flinch. The sting and burn never comes. Something different happens—a warm, gentle caress flutters across my cheek. “I will never let you go back to him. Do you hear me?”
I nod but don’t believe him. He’s corrupt, money, and power, just like Jordan.
“I promise you, Navy.”
“How can you? If he wants me, then I’m his.”
Before he can respond, his cell phone rings. I immediately miss his touch when he drops his palm to dig in the pocket of his pants. His features harden when he looks down at the phone, his “no shit given none taken” mask firmly back in place. He surprises me when he leans forward while answering the call. His lips graze my forehead. It’s not quite a kiss but is still a kiss. The sensation that floods my body is overwhelming. Just a simple touch that’s not threatening has me coming undone.
“Excuse me.” He covers the mouthpiece of the phone with a large hand. “I have to take this.”
He rises to his feet. His towering frame above me is a simple reminder how powerful a man he is. Jordan didn’t start out showing his true colors; it took him time. But once that evil veil lifted, it was nothing but torture and pain.
I study J.J.’s retreating form as he strides back up the lawn and to his mansion. His back flexes with each movement. His long, lean legs pound the ground. I don’t have to see his face to know the call was an unwelcome one, pissing him off. And this is how it all starts. I’ll be the object he takes his aggression out on. It’s my reality no matter how delightful the feel of his touch was. I’m cursed.
I lie back in the grass, balancing the tomato on my sternum. I clutch the short, clipped grass in my hands and stare up at the clouds. The sounds of Mother Nature sighing all around me tickles all my senses. I go back to a place I never should’ve left. Home. I get lost in the memories and lose reality for the time being.